12 Bloody Days of Christmas: Day 7 ‘Terrifying Toys’

Let’s face it; Christmas is a consumer driven holiday. Much of what we consider tradition wouldn’t be possible without Black Friday, over the limit credit lines, and constant cash flow. In the minds of children everywhere (thanks in part to Santa), Christmas just wouldn’t be Christmas without presents. It’s not until you start to realize that many childhood wish lists are filled with over the top, nightmarish novelties that Christmas morning suddenly has a whole new meaning. On the seventh day of Christmas, Bloody-Disgusting gave to me – “Terrifying Toys.”

Day 1: Creepy Christmas Traditions
Day 2: Christmas Characters Gone Wrong
Day 3: Horrifying Holiday Decorations
Day 4: Twisted Yuletide Tales
Day 5: The Nightmare Before Christmas
Day 6: Creepy Christmas Movies
Day 7: Terrifying Toys
Day 8: Top 10 Potential Holiday Weapons
Day 9: Horror’s New Year’s Resolutions
Day 10: Top Picks for the New Year
Day 11: Ghosts of Christmas
Day 12: Happy Horror Holidays

Day 7: Terrifying Toys
There’s something about Christmas that brings out the greedy little brat in all of us. With lists a mile long, lengthy mall excursions, and empty bank accounts- Christmas has become an excuse to `shop till we drop.’ Toys in particular get the most attention during the holidays. There’s always one toy that sticks out to a child, and every year a new fad takes over. I can name dozens of different toys that hit shelves during the holidays, causing parents to do everything from steal to throw punches. The funny thing is, looking at some of these toys, they’re downright terrifying. They’re the kind of things that you would see in a horror movie (think Chucky people, come on). And they say horror fans are a bit crazy.

TICKLE ME ELMO

Elmo has quite the racket going. He’s a little red monster that teaches the alphabet and lives in a crayon house with a pet fish. That’s his gig. But when the toy companies decided that he would make a better toy than a celebrity, all hell broke loose. Tickle Me Elmo was the `must have’ toy of 1996… and to this day, I think he’s just a bit too much.

FURBY

Remember Giga Pets? I had one- probably more than one- but it was like a handheld game. You were given an electronic `pet’ and had to take care of it or, well, it would die. It was a first dose of reality. A Furby is kind of like that- only a lot creepier, and it talks back. It also has its own language called Furbish that it speaks fluently, at least until you teach it English. I don’t know about you, but that voice sure reminds me of a certain red headed doll…

SINGAMAJIGS

I’m not even going to censor my thoughts here- not only do these things look like sex dolls but they’re like little sad monsters. They look flat out depressed! Add in some kind of upbeat tunes that come out of them when you squeeze their bodies and these things are just, well, wrong. And they’re supposedly a pretty hot toy this year. Thank goodness I don’t have children yet.

MR. POTATO HEAD

The latest and greatest versions of Mr. Potato Head and his wife, the infamous Mrs., really aren’t that scary. They’re just a brown lump with some attachments. But looking back at the original Mr. Potato Head, the one that popped up in 1952, as a kid, I never would have eaten another potato in my life.

IT’S NOT JUST THE FADS…

While there are plenty of creepy mainstream toys, it’s usually the ones I find in the clearance aisle that give me the willies.

Maybe we should rethink this whole Zhu Zhu pet thing…

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