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Story Time: If You Want to Break Up With Me I Won’t Kill You With My Mind.

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He’s sick, sad, and strange. And he explores that weird place where humor and horror run into each other. Welcome to the darkly funny world of Paul Bibeau.

Inside you’ll find a creeptacular story entitled “If you want to break up with me I won’t kill you with my mind.” You’ll find more from Bibeau over at Goblin Books.
Just tell me how you feel, okay? I want you to be completely honest. Because if you don’t want to go out with me anymore I need to hear that. I’d be upset sure. But I promise we can still be friends. And I definitely won’t use my powers to put a blood clot in your brain and kill you.

Don’t say nothing’s wrong, because I can tell. There’s this, this distance between us lately. You won’t acknowledge it, but I know it’s there. It’s been there since Tuesday, when that old woman tried to steal your parking spot, and I got into her mind and made her slam the car door on her hand.

What is it? Do you need more time to yourself? Are we moving too fast? You can tell me, because there’s no pressure. I love you so much that I truly want what’s best for you. I know you’re a little worried, because of what happened to Troy, but he was nothing like you. He just didn’t care about people and he hurt me. You’d never do something like that. I don’t want to say more, because that task force is still trying to find him. But he’s not dead or anything. He’s alone somewhere, and he’s going to have a lot of time to think about what he did.

You want to see other people, don’t you? Go ahead! You can say it. Nothing bad will happen. Just say it. Don’t you want to see other people? Seriously. Is that what this is all about?

It’s that bitch, Shelley, isn’t it? The one I’m going to give ovarian cancer? Not because of you, though. She just… she just annoys me sometimes, and I think it would be good to force her go through that so she wouldn’t be so fake all the time. And I know that eventually we’ll be together, so even if you need some space right now, I know it won’t be forever. We were meant to be. I can feel it. This is fine. Fine!

I’m sorry. I don’t mean to start crying. It’s just… I get so emotional when I think about how important we are to each other. And it makes me mad. No, not mad. Frustrated. I’m not really mad, honey.

Wow, what happened to that guy? Over there by the Food Court? It looks like a heart attack – the way he’s turning all purpley. I hope he’s okay.

I didn’t cause that, if that’s what you’re thinking. Really, that wasn’t me. I honestly don’t think it was. I mean, sometimes I get upset, and I can feel this rush of energy, and things just happen. But I’m not doing it on purpose. Like with Shelley. I said I wanted to give her cancer, but I was just kidding. I don’t want her to die. It wouldn’t be my fault if she just… y’know… threw herself off the roof of the school.

Anyway, here: I wrote you a 28-page letter and made you a Paula Cole playlist. Let’s talk this out. I know we can make it work.

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‘Phantasm’ – Why the Horror Classic’s Exploration of Death Still Resonates 45 Years Later

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As Benjamin Franklin famously wrote, “In this world nothing can be said to be certain, except death and taxes.”

The horror genre offers a controlled environment in which viewers can reflect on their own morality, whether it be via catharsis or escapism, but a personal loss can complicate one’s relationship with horror. Even the most hardened of fans may struggle to find comfort in the genre after experiencing the death of a loved one.

45 years ago today, Phantasm helped viewers confront death head-on while subtly exploring the grief that accompanies it. In the film, 13-year-old Mike (A. Michael Baldwin) convinces his older brother-turned-guardian Jody (Bill Thornbury) and their affable neighborhood ice cream man, Reggie (Reggie Bannister), to investigate a mysterious mortician dubbed The Tall Man (Angus Scrimm).

Phantasm was the third feature from writer-director Don Coscarelli (The Beastmaster, Bubba Ho-Tep). The seed was planted upon witnessing the audience react to a small jump scare at a preview screening for his previous effort, the 1976 coming-of-age tale Kenny and Company. Chasing that jolt of adrenaline, he challenged himself to make a movie that delivers scares regularly throughout.

The independent production was shot in 1977 on weekends over the course of nearly a year in and around southern California’s San Fernando Valley. The 23-year-old Coscarelli shrewdly rented the film gear on Fridays and returned it Monday morning, getting three days of work out of a single day’s rental fee. When all was said and done, the film cost an estimated $300,000.

Unable to afford a full crew, Coscarelli also took on director of photography and editing duties. His father, Dac Coscarelli, receives a producer credit for providing a large chunk of the film’s funding. Additional financing was invested by doctors and lawyers, accruing a total estimated budget of $300,000. His mother, Kate Coscarelli, served as production designer, wardrobe stylist, and makeup artist under different pseudonyms, and she later wrote the novelization.

Hot off the success of John Carpenter’s Halloween, AVCO Embassy Pictures purchased Phantasm for distribution. It was released on March 28, 1979 in California and Texas before expanding to other territories and becoming a box office success. It spawned four sequels, with Coscarelli and the core cast on board throughout, along with a cult following that counts Quentin Tarantino, Rob Zombie, Snoop Dogg, and JJ Abrams (who named Star Wars: The Force Awakens‘ Captain Phasma in its honor) among its ranks.

PHANTASM Remastered

The film embraces nightmare logic – in part by design, as Coscarelli drew influence from Suspiria; partly the result of extensively editing down an overlong first cut to a tight 89 minutes. The it-was-all-a-dream ending is a rare one that doesn’t undermine the entire movie that preceded it. Not every plot point is spelled out for the viewer, and some dots may not completely connect, but the narrative is conveyed in such an engrossing manner that it hardly matters.

A particularly striking pair of back-to-back sequences occur at the conclusion of the first act. Following a late-night graveyard excursion, the camera pulls out on a shot of a sleeping Mike to reveal his bed in the cemetery with The Tall Man poised over him while ghouls attack from their graves. The next day, Mike witnesses The Tall Man affected by the chill of Reggie’s ice cream truck via a spine-tingling slow-motion zoom.

The special effects also shine, from flying metallic spheres that suck the blood out of victims’ heads to lifelike severed fingers that bleed viscous yellow gore. The visuals are supplemented by progressive music composed by Fred Myrow and Malcolm Seagrave, to whom Coscarelli recommended electronica maestro Vangelis and Pink Floyd’s Dark Side of the Moon. Despite its repetition throughout the film, the power of their haunting musical theme is never diluted.

The cast was populated by amateurs, but occasionally hammy performances are far outweighed by naturalistic character moments, best exemplified by the scene in which Jody and Reggie jam on their guitars together. In addition to serving the plot by introducing the tuning fork that plays an integral role in the finale, it allows the viewer to better connect with the characters, thereby making their peril all the more frightening.

It’s character building like this that makes Phantasm‘s exploration of death so effective. The film is ultimately about Mike coming to terms with the passing of Jody, portrayed as the cool older sibling every adolescent wishes they had. Mike confronts his fear by dreaming up a final adventure with his dearly departed brother in which they manage to defeat death itself, represented by The Tall Man. Upon doing so, he’s awakened to the harsh reality that Jody died in a car accident, allowing Mike to reach the final stage of grief: acceptance.

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