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Christmas Playlist: 8 Holiday Songs for the Horror Fan!

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Gremlins

Horror fans love the holidays too, if the ever-growing catalog of holiday horror movies is any indication. But the endless loop of the same holiday songs playing in the department stores has long grown stale, and it lacks that macabre twist anyhow.

Specifically for horror fans, here are 8 songs to add to your holiday playlist!


Misfits – “You’re a Mean One, Mr. Grinch”

The original song was created for the 1966 cartoon based on Dr. Seuss’ book How the Grinch Stole Christmas, and Seuss wrote the lyrics himself. I suppose a family Christmas cartoon doesn’t exactly scream horror, but the lyrics are one endless stream of insults. Catchy and mean! It’s even catchier as a cover by horror punk band Misfits, released on their EP Horror Xmas.


Christopher Lee – “Jingle Hell”

At nearly 92 years old, horror icon Christopher Lee became the oldest living performer to enter the Billboard music charts, and with a heavy metal take on a Christmas classic no less. His second Christmas album A Heavy Metal Christmas Too, features another round of rousing metal covers of well-known holiday songs, but “Jingle Hell” is a great place to start.  Lee began his music career singing on The Wicker Man soundtrack, but who knew he’d eventually melt Santa’s face off with heavy guitar riffs?


Tales from the Crypt – “Have Yourself a Scary Little Christmas”

Remember when the Cryptkeeper released a holiday album, titled Have Yourself a Scary Little Christmas? Released in 1994 and now long out of print, it was full of spoofs and puns of popular holiday songs sung by John Kassir as the Cryptkeeper. This means that the entire album is appropriate for your holiday horror playlist, but this song in particular features a dramatic reenactment over the song of horror comic story “And All Through the House” that accompanied the comic reprint in the CD’s booklet.


Anna and the Apocalypse – “It’s That Time of Year”

The entire soundtrack for this Christmas set zombie musical is worth a listen, but “It’s That Time of Year” sung by actress Marli Siu is a holiday standout. It’s a tongue-in-cheek Christmas song in the vein of “Santa Baby,” and it’s dripping with sexual innuendo. Once you see it performed in the film, the comical number will forever be etched in your brain.


Krampus – “Karol of the Bells”

Composer Douglas Pipes gave a haunting twist to popular Christmas song “Carol of the Bells” for the holiday horror-comedy’s end credits. But director Michael Dougherty wanted to include a children’s choir so he added lyrics that served as a cautionary tale and called upon his nephew’s show choir at California’s Brea Olinda High School to record it. Thus, “Karol of the Bells” superior horror twist to a familiar Christmas tune was born.


A Christmas Horror Story – “It’s Christmas Eve”

Alex Khaskin’s opening theme to holiday horror anthology A Christmas Horror Story begins as seemingly normal Christmas music, with saccharine vocals and light-hearted instrumentals. Even the lyrics are traditional. But then the music gets heavier and more ominous, and the chanting kicks in. The lyrics also take a decidedly dark turn, making references to the changelings, demons, and dark spirits in the film.


The Nightmare Before Christmas – “Making Christmas”

Tim Burton’s stop-motion animation feature that sees the gothic, monstrous residents of Halloween Town attempt to take over Christmas is a holiday classic. It helps that the music by Danny Elfman is extremely catchy. “Making Christmas” perfectly encapsulates the spooky holiday tone, in which the town gets to work creating creepy holiday toys and décor. As an alternative to the movie’s version of this song, Rise Against covered the song for Disney’s cover album Nightmare Revisited.


The Gremlins – “The Gremlin Rag”

One of six songs composed by Jerry Goldsmith for the soundtrack, “The Gremlin Rag” is the main theme song to this seminal holiday horror movie written by Chris Columbus and directed by Joe Dante. The theme will embed itself in your head on its own, but this clip from the movie that shows the pint-sized terrors caroling to their own theme song is the best.

Horror journalist, RT Top Critic, and Critics Choice Association member. Co-Host of the Bloody Disgusting Podcast. Has appeared on PBS series' Monstrum, served on the SXSW Midnighter shorts jury, and moderated horror panels for WonderCon and SeriesFest.

Editorials

‘A Haunted House’ and the Death of the Horror Spoof Movie

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Due to a complex series of anthropological mishaps, the Wayans Brothers are a huge deal in Brazil. Around these parts, White Chicks is considered a national treasure by a lot of people, so it stands to reason that Brazilian audiences would continue to accompany the Wayans’ comedic output long after North America had stopped taking them seriously as comedic titans.

This is the only reason why I originally watched Michael Tiddes and Marlon Wayans’ 2013 horror spoof A Haunted House – appropriately known as “Paranormal Inactivity” in South America – despite having abandoned this kind of movie shortly after the excellent Scary Movie 3. However, to my complete and utter amazement, I found myself mostly enjoying this unhinged parody of Found Footage films almost as much as the iconic spoofs that spear-headed the genre during the 2000s. And with Paramount having recently announced a reboot of the Scary Movie franchise, I think this is the perfect time to revisit the divisive humor of A Haunted House and maybe figure out why this kind of film hasn’t been popular in a long time.

Before we had memes and internet personalities to make fun of movie tropes for free on the internet, parody movies had been entertaining audiences with meta-humor since the very dawn of cinema. And since the genre attracted large audiences without the need for a serious budget, it made sense for studios to encourage parodies of their own productions – which is precisely what happened with Miramax when they commissioned a parody of the Scream franchise, the original Scary Movie.

The unprecedented success of the spoof (especially overseas) led to a series of sequels, spin-offs and rip-offs that came along throughout the 2000s. While some of these were still quite funny (I have a soft spot for 2008’s Superhero Movie), they ended up flooding the market much like the Guitar Hero games that plagued video game stores during that same timeframe.

You could really confuse someone by editing this scene into Paranormal Activity.

Of course, that didn’t stop Tiddes and Marlon Wayans from wanting to make another spoof meant to lampoon a sub-genre that had been mostly overlooked by the Scary Movie series – namely the second wave of Found Footage films inspired by Paranormal Activity. Wayans actually had an easier time than usual funding the picture due to the project’s Found Footage presentation, with the format allowing for a lower budget without compromising box office appeal.

In the finished film, we’re presented with supposedly real footage recovered from the home of Malcom Johnson (Wayans). The recordings themselves depict a series of unexplainable events that begin to plague his home when Kisha Davis (Essence Atkins) decides to move in, with the couple slowly realizing that the difficulties of a shared life are no match for demonic shenanigans.

In practice, this means that viewers are subjected to a series of familiar scares subverted by wacky hijinks, with the flick featuring everything from a humorous recreation of the iconic fan-camera from Paranormal Activity 3 to bizarre dance numbers replacing Katy’s late-night trances from Oren Peli’s original movie.

Your enjoyment of these antics will obviously depend on how accepting you are of Wayans’ patented brand of crass comedy. From advanced potty humor to some exaggerated racial commentary – including a clever moment where Malcom actually attempts to move out of the titular haunted house because he’s not white enough to deal with the haunting – it’s not all that surprising that the flick wound up with a 10% rating on Rotten Tomatoes despite making a killing at the box office.

However, while this isn’t my preferred kind of humor, I think the inherent limitations of Found Footage ended up curtailing the usual excesses present in this kind of parody, with the filmmakers being forced to focus on character-based comedy and a smaller scale story. This is why I mostly appreciate the love-hate rapport between Kisha and Malcom even if it wouldn’t translate to a healthy relationship in real life.

Of course, the jokes themselves can also be pretty entertaining on their own, with cartoony gags like the ghost getting high with the protagonists (complete with smoke-filled invisible lungs) and a series of silly The Exorcist homages towards the end of the movie. The major issue here is that these legitimately funny and genre-specific jokes are often accompanied by repetitive attempts at low-brow humor that you could find in any other cheap comedy.

Not a good idea.

Not only are some of these painfully drawn out “jokes” incredibly unfunny, but they can also be remarkably offensive in some cases. There are some pretty insensitive allusions to sexual assault here, as well as a collection of secondary characters defined by negative racial stereotypes (even though I chuckled heartily when the Latina maid was revealed to have been faking her poor English the entire time).

Cinephiles often claim that increasingly sloppy writing led to audiences giving up on spoof movies, but the fact is that many of the more beloved examples of the genre contain some of the same issues as later films like A Haunted House – it’s just that we as an audience have (mostly) grown up and are now demanding more from our comedy. However, this isn’t the case everywhere, as – much like the Elves from Lord of the Rings – spoof movies never really died, they simply diminished.

A Haunted House made so much money that they immediately started working on a second one that released the following year (to even worse reviews), and the same team would later collaborate once again on yet another spoof, 50 Shades of Black. This kind of film clearly still exists and still makes a lot of money (especially here in Brazil), they just don’t have the same cultural impact that they used to in a pre-social-media-humor world.

At the end of the day, A Haunted House is no comedic masterpiece, failing to live up to the laugh-out-loud thrills of films like Scary Movie 3, but it’s also not the trainwreck that most critics made it out to be back in 2013. Comedy is extremely subjective, and while the raunchy humor behind this flick definitely isn’t for everyone, I still think that this satirical romp is mostly harmless fun that might entertain Found Footage fans that don’t take themselves too seriously.

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