Valentine’s Day is the time for couples to show how much they mean to each other, but when most couples are dining at fancy restaurants or cuddling at the movie theater, some of us just want to stay at home and play video games with the person that makes us the happiest.
This assumes, of course, that you’ve found that special someone in your life, the yin to your yang, the peanut butter to your jelly, the Peach to your Mario. If you have then I suggest you read on for a few suggestions that might just add a little video game flavored love sauce to your life.
This is for the lucky souls who’ve found someone with gaming skills that match their own since it’ll take teamwork and more than a fair share of rough action in the shadows to get the job done in this game. If you think you and your partner are up for it I suggest a night of Conviction where you and the potential love of your life can work together to silently dispose of waves of bad guys. Just make sure the lights are turned off for maximum… stealthiness.
Is your romance on the fast track to full on love? Do you share your affection with more than one person? Good, because Blur is the perfect game for hot car on car action you can share with up to three special someones. Hell, you could even make them fight for your affection in a splitscreen brawl where whoever wins gets a date with you. Throw in some electronic beats and a hefty amount of incredibly sexy cars and you have yourself a fun night.
Have you found yourself in a relationship of suppression? Does your partner order you around like you’re an incapable monkey? Do they force you to wear a crazy head gadget that bends you to their will? Alright, that last one might’ve been a bit of a stretch but if you’re in a repressed romance I suggest a little Enslaved to send the subtle message that you’re feeling a little stifled. Plus, if your special someone doesn’t necessarily enjoy playing video games, perhaps they’ll like watching you play.
Are you in a tough long distance relationship? Do you and your sweetheart share a fondness for beating up hookers, spraying the town with feces or pimping out cars so you can run over pedestrians in style? If you answered yes then I highly suggest giving Saint’s Row 2 a go as it provides all that and so much more. And when you get sick of the game’s story, though I don’t know how anyone could, you and your beloved can pull a Bonnie and Clyde and make a spectacular last stand against the fuzz.
This is a game that requires teamwork and preferably a partner that doesn’t have a weak stomach as you’ll be fighting all sorts of monsters that’ll require a quick trigger finger and . When you’re done you can try a little role play by throwing on some of the costumes for Chris and Sheva including a badass leather suit for the Chris and a skimpy tribal bikini for Sheva.
Whether your shnookums has a fondness for video games or couldn’t care less about them, this is the game that has the best chance of getting them to pick up a controller. The best thing about it is its shallow learning curve, adorable art style and the option to pick out your Sackboy or Sackgirl’s ensemble. And when the campaign gets old I suggest checking out the community created maps for endless hours of fun.
Sure Activision might’ve shuttered the Guitar Hero franchise but that doesn’t mean you can’t still come together with your sexual sidekick for some musical shenanigans. If you really want to impress them I suggest a duet, just make sure you warm up first. And remember, if you’re insanely good at these types of games and know your partner isn’t, go easy on them, it’s no fun for them if they have to witness you jump on the table to beat your high score on a song.
They say horror movies are the ultimate aphrodisiac, so assuming that rule also applies to video games, that would make Dead Space 2 the skeleton key to your other half’s lower regions. Just light some candles and cozy up on the couch for some raunchy strategic dismembering action. Or, if you have Extraction and a partner that’s willing to brave the Necromorph filled halls of the USG Ishimura than that could be just as fun. Just make sure they know what they’re getting into.
this week in horror
This Week in Horror - May 1, 2017 - The Mist, Hellboy, Michael...
The Mist has an extra gory new trailer, Hellboy is getting an R-rated reboot, and legendary actor Michael Parks passed away.Posted by Bloody-Disgusting on Wednesday, May 17, 2017
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