Some news I feared I’d someday have to report- is Dario Argento’s The Card Player a piece of crap? According to Dom, it just may be… also inside Dom talks about how unlucky thirteen really is, read on for the fun story-telling of Dominic F. Marceau, your FanTasia groupie! Keep up with all of Dom’s great stories by clicking here.
Dario Argento is a scary guy. Period. This man can conjure up the most indelible imagery to grave the silver screen. I remember a long time ago, I rented the film “Deep Red Hatchet Murders”. Of course, I’m referring to the heavily cut version of his brilliant: “Profondo Rosso”. Now, the film I saw back then was really heavy on the dialogue but some of its imagery scared the Holy Crap out of me! That laughing wind-up doll towards the end, sent chills down my spine. The movie was kind of a mess, being that it was butchered by censors, but I still took some of it with me when I went to bed that night. And that music! The fantastic score by Goblin was something I’d never heard in a horror film. I wanted to know, and hear, more! Ever since, I’ve been a fan of this man’s work, seeing film after film, wanting to see what he would conjure up next. I sure hope, dear bloody-disgusting reader, that you own your copy of this man’s masterpiece: “Suspiria”. If you don’t, you suck. Stop reading this and go out and buy it! It is, bar none, the most intense fright fest this reporter has ever seen. It is the most visually arresting, sonically charged, dripping-with-maggots horror film ever made. I cannot recommend it enough. Anchor Bay Entertainment issued a triple DVD set a few years back that is a gift from above. As soon as I am done with this report, I’m going to watch it again! Dario Argento, unfortunately, has never matched this brilliant film. With every new entry, he went further and further down from the zenith he had reached with “Suspiria”. Some of his subsequent outings were interesting, but we all sensed that our favorite scary guy was losing ground. It is that thought that was going through my mind when I sat down to watch his latest effort: The Card Player.
There’s a serial killer on the loose that has Roman officials baffled. One of their officers, Anna (the beautiful Björk-like Stefania Rocca), receives an e-mail from this unknown assailant. He wants her to play a game of Internet Poker. The stakes are high: if they win four hands, he lets his victim go. But, with every hand that he wins, he cuts something off. After four wins, he “ends the game” for his victim. The police are witness to this as this maniac has a webcam pointed straight at his victim’s face. They call his bluff, but when the first abducted female, a British citizen, is killed “live”, the police know that this guy is serious. A British forensics specialist helps the Roman police to track down this clever killer before he abducts another female. But, this is a Dario Argento film. You know there will be plenty more to see…
This evening was a complete letdown. I was expecting to be thrilled, to be stressed out of my wits, to have my blood pressure go up. Sadly, I experienced nothing of the sort. So, after the screening, I stopped by Krispy Kreme.
Maybe my blood pressure will go up after all…
Cut to credits.