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Best & Worst ’10: MR. DISGUSTING’S BOTTOM 10 OF 2010

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If I hadn’t been checking out the various film festivals over the past year, I doubt I would have been able to assemble a top 10 list. This year was such a crap-fest that making my list of the 10 worst films of the year was a breeze. It was too easy. In fact, I had to leave a dozen or so films off the list. Feelings will be hurt, but you know what, get over it. Grow some thick skin. Make a better movie in 2011.

Mr. Disgusting (Best/Worst) | Ryan Daley (Best/Worst) | David Harley (Best/Worst)
BC (Best/Worst) | Micah (Best/Worst) | Keenan (Best/Worst) | Theo (Best/Worst)
Best One Sheets | Worst One Sheets
Most Memorable Moments | Top Trailers | Memorable Quotes

MR. DISGUSTING’s BOTTOM 10 OF 2010

10. A Nightmare on Elm Street (April 30; New Line Cinema)


Freddy Krueger’s return to the big screen had so much promise: a huge budget, sweet special effects, and a pretty solid script that involved “micro-naps”. The unfortunate hiring of music video director Sam Bayer proved costly as Elm Street had zero scare, and even found a way to completely ignore the micro-nap subplot. The film was damaged by multiple cuts and reshoots that we unfortunately never got to see on DVD/Blu-ray. While it could have been worse, it was pretty “meh”. I didn’t lose any sleep over it.

9. My Soul to Take 3D (October 8; Rogue Pictures)


I almost hate including Wes Craven’s disasterpiece in my top 10 worst because it’s so darn entertaining. I guess I could easily dub it the “best of worst of 2010”? Confusing, odd and strangely hypnotic, it’s easy to recommend the film to horror fans, but with the stern warning that it will in fact melt your brain.

8. The New Daughter (January; Anchor Bay)


I saw this so long ago I barely remember it even coming out. I sat in a theater by myself as zero people showed up for the single screening in Beverly Hills. It was a laugh riot as New Daughter is littered with horrid dialogue. But what made it unbearable was how darn boring it was. Daughter feels like a made-for-TV movie that would eventually hit SyFy or get dumped on DVD.

7. The Wolfman (February 12; Universal Pictures)


If you can’t even make the transformation sequence cool, what else is there to talk about? Fail.

6. The Ward (TBD; TBD)


In my humble opinion, John Carpenter is the best horror director of our time, or at least the 1980s. The sheer number of incredible films is hard to ignore, so when Carpenter announced his return to director’s chair for this Amber Heard psychological thriller, how could I not be excited? It was heartbreaking to return from the world premiere with the news that The Ward should be committed, especially for completely failing to decide what kind of horror movie it wanted to be.

5. Jonah Hex (June 18; Warner Bros. Pictures)


The “frankenfilm” of the year, this comic book adaptation is quite simply soulless. There’s nothing here but forgettable characters and forgettable action sequences; sh*t, I can’t remember I single thing about the movie other than the fact that Megan Fox had her breasts all greased up throughout. Win?

4. Chain Letter (October 1; New Films International)


Yet another Twisted Pictures failure; the production team behind the Saw franchise can’t catch a break outside of Jigsaw’s games as they delivered a slasher movie that involved, gulp, a chain letter. Scaaarrry. Some of the kills are cool, but they are far and few between. If anything, Chain Letter felt like a really crappy direct-to-disc release. Full theatrical release? Come on.

3. Legion (January 22; Sony Screen Gems)


When all is said and done, Legion is all talk and no “do”, a prude film with some seriously wasted potential. It’s boring, slow-paced and takes itself way too goddamn seriously. Snore. The film’s worst offense is stealing it’s plotline from James Cameron’s Terminator.

2. Clash of the Titans 3D (April 2; Warner Bros. Pictures)


I’m a huge fan of the original Clash of the Titans, but it was one of those films that a remake could have done it some good. Unfortunately, many of the original film’s problems remain intact in this 2010 version, not to mention how simple Perseus’ quest is. There’s zero suspense and even the CGI is overdone (not all that surprising). It also gets a big f*ck you for post-converting to 3-D so they can charge exuberant ticket prices.

1. Case 39 (October 1; Paramount Pictures)


I can’t even begin to tell you how much I hate this movie. I hate Every. Single. Thing. about it. HATE. I hate that the running time just missed two hours. I hate that Renee Zellweger stars. I hate that it was released because Bradley Cooper was hot off of The Hangover. I hate that there are 13 fake scares. I hate that director Christian Alvart can’t decide what red herring to run with (is the little girl bad?) I hate the way it looked. I hated every inch of this movie and pray to the gods that none of you have to bare witness to such an atrocity of cinema. FAIL FAIL FAIL.

Dishonorable Mentions:


The Butcher Brothers’ The Violent Kind took what could have easily become a cult film and turned in into a mindboggling mess. From horror pacing issues, to oddball dialogue choices, Violent Kind never gains the audience’s attention nor asks for them to even care. The characters are forgettable, unlikable and remarkably stupid (literally) that it’s nearly impossible to avoid looking at your watch. Tim Sullivan returned behind the camera for the much anticipated 2001 Maniacs: Field of Screams, which ended up being the single worst movie I saw this year. I opted not to include it on my list because it only screened in one theater (that I’m aware of) for the DVD release. From the horrid cinematography to the oddly racist jokes (I don’t find myself overly sensitive or easily offended) and terrible sound design, 2001 Maniacs 2 can easily be summed up as “embarrassing'” — at least there’s one cool kill (a circular blade to the crotch). Another highly anticipated sequel that I found quite disappointing was Adam Green’s Hatchet II. While it didn’t make the bottom 10, I was extremely disappointed, with the crux of the problems being the screenplay. The pacing was off, Tony Todd talks wayyyyyy too much, and Danielle Harris takes the role to a new level of overacting. Beyond the script flaws, there are some absolutely incredible kills, and the movie does find a way to end on a high note with one hell of a extraordinary kill.

Horror movie fanatic who co-founded Bloody Disgusting in 2001. Producer on Southbound, V/H/S/2/3/94, SiREN, Under the Bed, and A Horrible Way to Die. Chicago-based. Horror, pizza and basketball connoisseur. Taco Bell daily. Franchise favs: Hellraiser, Child's Play, A Nightmare on Elm Street, Halloween, Scream and Friday the 13th. Horror 365 days a year.

Editorials

Finding Faith and Violence in ‘The Book of Eli’ 14 Years Later

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Having grown up in a religious family, Christian movie night was something that happened a lot more often than I care to admit. However, back when I was a teenager, my parents showed up one night with an unusually cool-looking DVD of a movie that had been recommended to them by a church leader. Curious to see what new kind of evangelical propaganda my parents had rented this time, I proceeded to watch the film with them expecting a heavy-handed snoozefest.

To my surprise, I was a few minutes in when Denzel Washington proceeded to dismember a band of cannibal raiders when I realized that this was in fact a real movie. My mom was horrified by the flick’s extreme violence and dark subject matter, but I instantly became a fan of the Hughes Brothers’ faith-based 2010 thriller, The Book of Eli. And with the film’s atomic apocalypse having apparently taken place in 2024, I think this is the perfect time to dive into why this grim parable might also be entertaining for horror fans.

Originally penned by gaming journalist and The Walking Dead: The Game co-writer Gary Whitta, the spec script for The Book of Eli was already making waves back in 2007 when it appeared on the coveted Blacklist. It wasn’t long before Columbia and Warner Bros. snatched up the rights to the project, hiring From Hell directors Albert and Allen Hughes while also garnering attention from industry heavyweights like Denzel Washington and Gary Oldman.

After a series of revisions by Anthony Peckham meant to make the story more consumer-friendly, the picture was finally released in January of 2010, with the finished film following Denzel as a mysterious wanderer making his way across a post-apocalyptic America while protecting a sacred book. Along the way, he encounters a run-down settlement controlled by Bill Carnegie (Gary Oldman), a man desperate to get his hands on Eli’s book so he can motivate his underlings to expand his empire. Unwilling to let this power fall into the wrong hands, Eli embarks on a dangerous journey that will test the limits of his faith.


SO WHY IS IT WORTH WATCHING?

Judging by the film’s box-office success, mainstream audiences appear to have enjoyed the Hughes’ bleak vision of a future where everything went wrong, but critics were left divided by the flick’s trope-heavy narrative and unapologetic religious elements. And while I’ll be the first to admit that The Book of Eli isn’t particularly subtle or original, I appreciate the film’s earnest execution of familiar ideas.

For starters, I’d like to address the religious elephant in the room, as I understand the hesitation that some folks (myself included) might have about watching something that sounds like Christian propaganda. Faith does indeed play a huge part in the narrative here, but I’d argue that the film is more about the power of stories than a specific religion. The entire point of Oldman’s character is that he needs a unifying narrative that he can take advantage of in order to manipulate others, while Eli ultimately chooses to deliver his gift to a community of scholars. In fact, the movie even makes a point of placing the Bible in between equally culturally important books like the Torah and Quran, which I think is pretty poignant for a flick inspired by exploitation cinema.

Sure, the film has its fair share of logical inconsistencies (ranging from the extent of Eli’s Daredevil superpowers to his impossibly small Braille Bible), but I think the film more than makes up for these nitpicks with a genuine passion for classic post-apocalyptic cinema. Several critics accused the film of being a knockoff of superior productions, but I’d argue that both Whitta and the Hughes knowingly crafted a loving pastiche of genre influences like Mad Max and A Boy and His Dog.

Lastly, it’s no surprise that the cast here absolutely kicks ass. Denzel plays the title role of a stoic badass perfectly (going so far as to train with Bruce Lee’s protégée in order to perform his own stunts) while Oldman effortlessly assumes a surprisingly subdued yet incredibly intimidating persona. Even Mila Kunis is remarkably charming here, though I wish the script had taken the time to develop these secondary characters a little further. And hey, did I mention that Tom Waits is in this?


AND WHAT MAKES IT HORROR ADJACENT?

Denzel’s very first interaction with another human being in this movie results in a gory fight scene culminating in a face-off against a masked brute wielding a chainsaw (which he presumably uses to butcher travelers before eating them), so I think it’s safe to say that this dog-eat-dog vision of America will likely appeal to horror fans.

From diseased cannibals to hyper-violent motorcycle gangs roaming the wasteland, there’s plenty of disturbing R-rated material here – which is even more impressive when you remember that this story revolves around the bible. And while there are a few too many references to sexual assault for my taste, even if it does make sense in-universe, the flick does a great job of immersing you in this post-nuclear nightmare.

The excessively depressing color palette and obvious green screen effects may take some viewers out of the experience, but the beat-up and lived-in sets and costume design do their best to bring this dead world to life – which might just be the scariest part of the experience.

Ultimately, I believe your enjoyment of The Book of Eli will largely depend on how willing you are to overlook some ham-fisted biblical references in order to enjoy some brutal post-apocalyptic shenanigans. And while I can’t really blame folks who’d rather not deal with that, I think it would be a shame to miss out on a genuinely engaging thrill-ride because of one minor detail.

With that in mind, I’m incredibly curious to see what Whitta and the Hughes Brothers have planned for the upcoming prequel series starring John Boyega


There’s no understating the importance of a balanced media diet, and since bloody and disgusting entertainment isn’t exclusive to the horror genre, we’ve come up with Horror Adjacent – a recurring column where we recommend non-horror movies that horror fans might enjoy.

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