[BD Caption Contest] Win ‘Jaws’ On Blu-ray!!!
The First Prize winner this week is wildgator25 (please DM me your US mailing address to receive your Limited Edition Walking Dead Season 2 Head Blu-ray).![Bd Caption WildGator 8 16 12 1024x649 [BD Caption Contest] Win Jaws On Blu ray!!!](http://cdn.bloody-disgusting.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/08/Bd_Caption_WildGator_8_16_12.jpg "Bd_Caption_WildGator_8_16_12")
This week we don’t have a mystery prize, instead we’re giving away Jaws on Blu-rays. It’s a truly amazing restoration of the film with a TON of extra bonus features! You can get an idea of it here. BOTH First prize and the runner-up in the upcoming contest will receive Blu-rays. First prize winner will also receive a Jaws bottle opener!
Head inside to see the runner-up and to start this week’s contest!
![Bd Caption ThatMovieNerd 8 18 12 1024x649 [BD Caption Contest] Win Jaws On Blu ray!!!](http://cdn.bloody-disgusting.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/08/Bd_Caption_ThatMovieNerd_8_18_12.jpg "Bd_Caption_ThatMovieNerd_8_18_12")
Our runner up is ThatMovieNerd. Sadly we can’t provide a prize for the runner-up for last week’s contest. Now, on to this week’s contest!
Rules:
1. We pick a still from a movie. You head to the comments section and submit your best one-liners, zingers, pathos riddled couplets etc…
2. You can enter as many times as you like and submit as many captions as you want, but each caption must be in a separate comment. Otherwise it will be too hard to tell where one caption ends and the other begins. Your entries can be posted anytime after the still is announced – just be sure to check that I haven’t announced that the contest is closed in the comments (you don’t want to submit your winning zinger after we’ve picked the winner). Also any racist, sexist, homophobic or generally hateful jokes will be disqualified. You don’t have to be insanely PC – just use your best judgement. Try and keep it brief! It has to fit on the photo now!
3. We pick the winner and announce them and their winning caption when the next photo in the contest is posted. We will address you by your BD Infected name. You can then DM me your US mailing address (no PO boxes) and I will send you your prize in a timely manner (i.e. you should have it in a couple of weeks). You must be a US resident to receive your prize!
First Prize and Runner-Up receive Jaws on Blu-ray.![BD Caption Halloween 6 8 18 12 1024x540 [BD Caption Contest] Win Jaws On Blu ray!!!](http://cdn.bloody-disgusting.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/08/BD_Caption_Halloween_6_8_18_12.jpg "BD_Caption_Halloween_6_8_18_12")
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Like my career,
He’s dead
Really, in the future I am funny!
I love you, MAN!!
Loomis: It’s over.
Rudd: Good, cause I got to go make Clueless
Paul Rudd looks pretty “Clueless”
Look, I understand you’re a virgin, but this isn’t the answer. I’ve helped others before.
Shoots him 6 times and doesn’t die.
Then shoots him once and is satisfied.
Loomis: Wow, that was disappointing
Be sure Michael understands…I want Phoebe’s head!!!
I triple dog dare you to do a movie called “Clueless”
Damn it, not another EMT
And that is how you dispose of a dead hooker
Tommy: I can smell that Loomis… Why would you just walk away?
Whatever you do, dont say Halloween 3 was a worthy sequel
Is that a gun in your pocket or you just happy to see me….oh darn it is a gun
Do it again and you’re grounded.
Man I’ve got to get me one of those canes. Such a pimp.
Have that report on my desk by noon.
damm i forgot my cell phone… you take care of Michael Myers ill be back in a bit
oops forgot the bullets ill be back
He’s still watching me isn’t he?
Don’t look at his ass, don’t look at his ass… D’oh!
RUDD: wait your leaving
LOOMIS: yes
RUDD: why
LOOMIS: Because you’re so clueless
Put some pictures up while you’re at it these walls are rather bland.
ok ok i wont fart again ..sorry
Don’t be embarrassed, Mr. Loomis. It happens to every guy as they get older.
Loomis: Oh my God. What’s that smell?
Tommy Doyle: That’s the smell of desire, my lady.
The Expendables 6
Doc! The Producer’s Cut is better, I swear!
Louis CK didn’t age well…he looks pissed off too.
Say what again…
Loomis: Doyle stand guard…there has to be a bathroom somewhere around here..
Anyone else says I didn’t “get” Prometheus gets shot in their stupid face.
This is my final film…you have to live with it for the rest of your life.
Doyle: Could you find a smaller gun?!
Loomis: Size don’t matter my boy
Roy Scheider In the exciting prequel : All That JAWS !!!
Knows gun won’t do any good, brings it anyway…
Doyle: How many shots does it take to kill Michael Myers?
Loomis: Fuck if I know.
Serious as pumpkin shit.
Loomis: I’m going in
Doyle: No prob,scream if you need me
Got prostate exam…. can’t look anyone in the eye.
Loomis: I said grey jacket, black shirt and green pants….not green jacket, grey shirt and black pants!
Damn, looks like someone needs to do their lunges!
Why does that guy keep checking out my ass?
It’s not for the career…It’s for the paycheck
This Myers kid is beginning to be a HUGE pain in the ass.
Doyle: Omg that smell… Talk about being scared shitless
You’re gonna need a bigger gun.
Wait… Did I leave the stove on?
Hold up.. I love you man
“Why do you have a gun?!” “They tell me I’m not Dr.Loomis!”
There must be a good Halloween Sequel somewhere around here.
Whatever, you go ahead.
I’ve got that Knocked Up sequel to make.
Really, in the future I’m funny!
If you tell that Michael Myers and his doctor joke one more time I’m gonna shoot you!
You mean I’m not Tim Matheson?
I guess I need to talk with Michael about being replaced and cancelling my contract after this picture.
Your asking yourself, was that 6 or 7 shots?
Do you feel lucky punk?
So, it takes a gun to get a lifetime contract with these guys, thanks for the tip.
“You know how I know you’re gay? Wig in Escape.”
Damn, was that a left followed by 2 rights or was that 2 rights followed by a left to find the exit?
Doctor your an old hack and your career is over.
I guess I need to talk with Michael about being replaced and renegotiating my contract.
Damn you can never find a nurse when you need one!
“Is it really a mugging if he only took my SAG card?”
Maybe I shouldn’t have told Pleasence they wrote him out of the series.
I did not know that about myself…
Well…that escalated quickly.
“Dr. Loomis, don’t move, there is a HUGE bee on the back of your head..”
Loomis: This is the last time the pharmacy f***s up my perscription.
Tommy, the bottle said ’4 hours’. Its been 3 days!
Loomis are you Prairie doggin it?
Your ass looks delightful from this angle, Dr. Loomis.
Watch my back
Did you really just crop dust me?
I see you baby… Shaking that ass.
Loomis: Which way to the daycare?
Must stop.. Rob Zombie.
You can keep the gun… I’ve got rune stones.
This all makes much more sense in the producer’s cut.
Are you sure this is the right way to the bathroom?
Doyle: I dont think that gun will help
Loomis: That’s why I brought my cane, dumbass
Stay here. I’m going to take out the director before it’s too late.
Loomis: Run! Pure evil is coming!
Doyle: Michael Myers?
Loomis: No, Judd Apatow.
“Don’t go…I can dress like a child if it helps?”
You probably won’t, win but you should. Wading through all the garbage submissions to find this one very edgy nugget was worth it.
Thank you.. it was one of my better submissions
“We don’t talk anymore… it’s just Michael this and Michael that”
With Cialis Daily Use… you can be ready anytime the moment is right.
“I met this six-year-old child, with this blank, pale, emotionless face and, the blackest eyes…” WE GET IT… HE’S EVIL!!
Tommy – “Doctor Loomis, you know that can’t stop Michael.”
Loomis – “Nothing can stop Michael, but it can stop who ever is creating these sequals”
New Line Cinema brings you the remake you’ve all been longing for…
Paul Rudd as Frodo, Donald Pleasance as Gandalf.
I’m working on this killer stride, watcha think?
Your friend was right. Steely Dan does gargle my balls.
We’re calling our kingdom ‘Kiss My Anthia’ and we really need a wizard….
Hey, Blofeld, did you loose your pussy or did Bond find double tap that thing?
You know how I know you’re gay, Rudd? You are starring at my ass as I walk away, you pervert.
Hey, Blofeld, did you loose your pussy or did Bond finally double tap that thing? (Edited for better understanding.)
“I met this sixty-year-old child, with this blank, pale, emotionless face and, the blackest eyes…” and I knew his ass was going back into the old folks home.
Should I tell ‘em about that “Kick Me” sign?
Dude…it’s Donald Pleasence!
Desperate measures are called for after Obama cuts medicare once again.
-Ey Vincent…what do they call a quarter pounder in France?
-Roy-all wit cheese…
Have you had yer dia-beet-iss checked?
-Oh fuck I shit myself…
-Oh fuck he shit himself
If my wife calls tell her I’m off to kill my illegitimate son…
Paul Rudd…speechless!?
Time to give out candy till one of the little bastards tries to stab me….
For the last time I don’t need glasses to shoot a gun!!!
NO MORE WARNING SHOTS!!!
Would it kill ya to smile???
Wouldn’t be easier to do this on some other day beside Trick or Treat night???
Hold me closer…….tiny dancer
This was a warning, but next time you drink the last of the milk I won’t be so nice.
SO this is what hollywoods game of LIFE looks like.
Hey dad.
Ya
FUCK YOU
I love petting pussys.
You know the cat.
Frankly old man I’m sick of you boozin’ up and shooting at beer cans in the hallway.
“So…no more slapping the bass?”
Don’t…go. I’ll be Paul Rudd without you…
“Hey Loomis…can you say Mauve?”
Maaaaaaaauuuuuuve!!!!
Busta Rhymes is going to be in a sequel? Not on my watch…
I’m going to go have a word with the writers…
Explosive diarrhea – it can strike anytime, anywhere.
It’s all because of the Mark of… what? Nevermind, I’m out.
I’m sorry Paul. I’ve seen what you are going to do with your career, and I just can’t let you live.
I treat all film roles one way – very seriously.
Time for the salary negotiations.
loomis: i’ve buried ghosts, like you buried your career
Craigslist, creating awkward meetings since 1995.
He looks nothing like his Myspace picture
Internet Dating 101, the sly walk by.
Like Ohmygosh He’s totally looking at me. Don’t look back Loomy you got this.
Maybe he didn’t notice…Dude I know you farted
Loomis: “What’s in your pocket?”
with capital one you never have to wonder
Shaft 2: Suburban Nightmares
Tommy: You know you can’t kill him, right? Only a Myers can kill a Myers.
Sam: Wrong movie, jackass.
You got get your friend laid.
I’m going to get paid.
Where are you going?
To get Michael! I’m determined to bring him to our “Dinner for Schmucks!”
Loomis was prepared for the next time someone yelled “Dat Ass” to him.
I take it you don’t like the formidable scent of my ‘Sex Panther’
If I did, I wouldn’t be contemplating shooting myself!
That’s right, walk away. You’ll come crawling back. They do every time… 60% of the time.
I don’t know why you always go on and on about Michael Myers. He’s a poser. He wears a Shatner mask, but ask him ONE Star Trek trivia question and all you get is a blank stare. I wouldn’t be surprised if he’d only ever watched the remake!
Paul Rudd: Hey! I just met you, and this is crazy, but here’s my prostate, so check it, maybe?
Fine, you do it. You kill Michael Myers.
You think it’s easy to f*ck with Myers? Damn, you’re “clueless”.
Sorry Paul Rudd, “I Could Never Be Your Woman”.
For God Sakes! I don’t have Diabeetus!
Sir Loomis, “I Love You, Man”. Now go kill Myers for me.
I promise you 60% of the time bullets work every time.
I’m kind of a pacifist, I don’t really believe in imaginary bloodshed.
HEy before you go die I just want you to know I love you, Bro Montana.
Was it something you read in my gournal?
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Tommy ) Dr Loomis guns wont work against Michael Myers he’s the boogy man 1
Loomis) Ive just read the script Tommy im going to shot the director.
Tommy ) Dr Loomis guns wont work against Michael Myers he’s the boogy man !
Loomis) Ive just read the script Tommy im going to shoot the director.
What, was it something I said?
Of all the days to forget my Geritol. . .
Don’t worry kid, your career survives this. I don’t.
Mind fetching me a fresh pair of depends? There’s a good lad.
I’m not your father? I’ll take care of her…
hey man where are you going?
leaving this series
Did you see the remake of halloween?
goodbye the series is dead like me
the original version of “I love you,man.”
well at lease Alex Delarge is playing you in the remake
my next movie after this is clueless.
what is your next movie roll?
Donald pleasence’s reaction to paul rudd’s career
Loomis reaction to Paul Rudd’s career.
Rudd:I was in the movie our idiot brother.
Loomis: you sucks
the original version of dinner for schmucks was darker
Loomis after seeing dinner for schmucks
want to see the movie year one
“Hell No”
Remember to shoot Michael in the head
or this series will keep going forever.
going to shoot Michael Myers now
which one the boogieman or shrek
auditions for 50 shades of grey the movie
where are you off to Loomis?
going to Miami to kill zombies
you sure you want to go now
my man Seth Rogan will be here in a few
wait we are still filming
Danielle Harris was right about leaving this movie
Screw you Pleasance. I’m Apatow’s bitch now!
“I think that old guy just pooped himself.”
“Did I just poop myself?”
I heard Rob Zombie’s taking over the franchise. I hereby resign.
Next season on “Top Shot”…
I love you, my psy-BRO-therapist.
…Nothing?
Dr Loomis and his assistant prepare to take on one of the worst cases of gonorrhea ever !
But, Mr. Sandusky … are you sure this is the way to the locker room?
seriously dude?… How are you going to fart and walk away like that?
You’ll never be as famous as me kid….challenge accepted.
im sorry the movie was awful… please dont leave me here in it!
TOMMY – Whoa! What is that?
LOOMIS – Sex Panther, by Odion.
Whoops! I pooped
Nobody messes with my Medicare!
This time, I going to shoot Michael in frank and beans.
This time, I’m going to shoot Michael in his frank and beans.
I’m going to force ILM to fix this train wreck.
We’re gonna need a bigger gun.
Time to put this series out of its misery.
This was the moment that Paul realized “tripping” with Donald Pleasance was a bad idea.
Agents are for p*ssies. This is how I negotiate for sequels.
Did you just fart, old man?
Uhh…. I must find him.
Loomis: If you say “slappa da baaaaaassss” one more time…
“Donald, where are you going? We’re still filming.”
Age gap dating often sounds like something that is daunting and ridiculous. Google— ❤❤ ageloving-❤❤ —-for inter-generational “real love” “friendship” “ chat” or ” dating “, Sincerely, I’m not kidding you, just have a try.—”seeing is believing”,..Join the age gap dating heaven to .make yourself believe that ” Age should never be the obstacle of seeking love.” Nothing lose for you, Good luck!!!
“Never trust a fart son, never trust a fart.”
“i’m gettin to old for this sh*t”
“i can’t work with somebody who starred in clueless”
Dad, are there days that you don’t feel fresh?
“When will blowing old men stop feeling weird?”
“You taste like burger. I don’t like you anymore!”
“I am Haddonfield’s RECKONING!”
“Really, Achorman 2?? I worked with a monkey. BOOM!”
-Michael…get up…Tommie’s giving that weird stare again.
-I can feeeel…your Rudder…
- Michael, my love. Don’t leave me with Rudd.
Wool Trench Coat: $59.00
Beard Wax: $15.00
Walking Cane: $39.00
Trying To Kill The Same Unkillable Maniac Over The Course Of 5 Films Using Bullets: CLUELESS
“Enough of this bullets shit, it’s time to cropdust this druidic bastard.”
“Don’t just stand there looking clueless, help me find the missing pages from the script!”
Rudd: “You got it Joben!”
Loomis: “…. What the F*** Did He Just Say?!”
I’m getting out of this shit movie and you should too!
That’s doing it geriatric style.
That guy stole my lunchbox in 1938! Oh man, this is gonna be sweet….
DAT ASS!
………
Hold it right there, pal. I’m gonna give you a lap dance you’ll never forget.
Just watch my feet. It’s step, cane, step step cane, BANG.
I just remembered…I forgot my Depends
“If you ask me ‘Do you know how I know you’re gay?’ just one more time tonight Mr. Doyle, so help me I will kill you myself.”
Yeah, you better walk away, hard-ass.
Hello…. is it me you’re looking for?
Dr Loomis, what is your secret? Your burn scars are hardly noticable anymore.
Dr Loomis finally had enough of the “DOYLE RULES” chant from Tommy.
Well yeah … I bet you my gun is bigger than yours
For get y– Wanderlust? You ass!
If you throw up, I’m not picking it up
At least my loins don’t look like my face
Stuck in a rudd, are we? God knows why you got hired
Celebrity ghost stories … I saw Paul Rudd.
Sorry, Kid, but you in fifty years isn’t all the bad.
You found the baby, I found the killer. Need I continue?
Michael Myers? That Canadian guy?
Tries to stop a knife-wielding maniac.
Scares kids, blows up cars, threatens police, brings gun to public hospitals.
Hey Evan, ever thought of restricting people to only one submission? Force them to think of their best and then submit it. I don’t envy you having to wade through so many ridiculous submissions from people who have no concept how to create a caption, or just copy something someone else already posted.
Benjamin Algar didn’t really need 9 entries.
@Michael_M There are issues with the current thing – but part of the fun is people submitting multiple times and – hopefully – getting better as they go along.
Son: I love you dad! Dad: Yes I know and I must tell that before I kill Micheal or he kills me that either way you still arent getting my bud light!
Where are you going Grampa? I forgot my viagra, when Im done here Im going to party!
Two guys, one gun…
Rudd: Okay here’s one. If Jamie Lloyd is Laurie Strode’s daughter and her uncle is Michael Myers. Then who is Michael to Laurie?
Dr. Loomis: Her “idiot brother”!!!!
Rudd: Oh, so you’ve heard that one before?
- Hold it right there…
It’s me…Snakes…
- I knew it was you…I could smell ya gettin off the elevator!
“Snakes…I know I’ve heard that name “Snakes” before.”
Tommy Doyle: Are we in one of those lame caption contest?
Dr.Loomis: I’m afraid we are.
Hold that thought, I REALLY gotta go!
“Hey Loomis, is that a gun in your pocket or are you just pleased to see… oh right, it’s a gun”
“Doyle, is it me or is your right hand really tiny?”
“You look familiar to me Doyle. Don’t tell me, don’t even give me a clue, less you tell me.”
Off to find Myers again?
At least I’m not slappin da bass…
I know he’s here somewhere, I can smell Bigfoot’s Dick!
“Even when things heat up in your bunker… Jackets by London Fog will keep you cool!”
We’re gonna need a bigger diaper.
Son of a bitch, who designed this crooked ass hallway?
You think this pistol’s weak? Wait until you read the script…
Nice buns, Loomis.
Loomis: I work out.
Tommy: Where are you going?
Loomis: To Shoot him 6 more times!
Tommy:Why are you leaving?
Loomis: I’ve already shot him 600 times!
“DEAD MAN WALKING”
Tommy: You don’t have any balls
Loomis: Thats why I have a Gun!
Tommy:Where are you going?
Loomis: I forgot to bring Bullets.
Tommy: Where are you going?
Loomis: Far away from you!
You’re eyes aren’t THAT hypnotic!
If you’re waiting on me, you’re backing up.
Hey Joe, where you going with that gun in your hand?
Oh Shit, I forgot about the muffins at home, be right back, Tommy.
I’m off to take out that Austin Powers guy once and for all!
We’ll meet back here in one hour, hopefully with KISS tickets!
You said $400, you didn’t say I had to kiss you on the mouth!
Paul: Don’t do anything stupid, Don. P.J. Soles wasn’t in The Fog either.
A Behind The Scenes Look At Chris O’Donnell and George Clooney In ‘Batman And Robin’!
You’re right Paul, I won’t pay a lot for that muffler!
“Slowly reach into your right pocket… and pull out your bitch card.”
A horrible thing to do jumping out wearing that mask… Nearly shot the little prick…
I don’t know about you but I’m off to see the wizard the wonderful wizard of oz……
Fuck he really lost it….
Fuck Michael I after the hooker that stole my wallet. Thieving little bitch….
Correction
Fuck Michael I’m after the hooker that stole my wallet. Thieving little bitch…
Mr. Loomis I have a Subpoena for you.
Oh I have something for you too my boy…
Meh I have better things to do with my free time….
Loomis: I’ll be right back.
Rudd: Ok! (mumbles under breath) Who the hell was that guy?
Rudd: Where you going?
Loomis: Forgot the bullets. Be right back.
Alright guys! Thanks for entering! Winners will be announced shortly.
I like your white hair. Does the carpet match your pubes?
It’s not the size, it’s how you use it.
It was either this or Escape from L.A
All right, time to die.
“I Love You Man” was not the first movie in which Paul Rudd used the phrase “Totes McGoats” to end a conversation with ill effect.
That bitch better have my money.
Tommy: Whats wrong?
Loomis: I heard Malcom Mcdowell is gonna play me in the Halloween remake, What should I do?
Doyle: Kill the B$#%@!
Loomis: Genuis!
tommy:(tells dirty joke) loomis: im going 2 pretend u never said that….
“You don’t know what death is”. But im off to show Rob Zombie what it is!