Why ‘Sharknado’ Isn’t the Best-Worst Movie, and Why It Doesn’t Deserve Your Time…

sharknado-2

Right now I’m chilling in a Chicago suburb where every word out of everyone’s mouth is “Sharknado” – it’s about as aggravating as when everyone around me thought Quentin Tarantino directed Hostel.

What has steam coming out of my ears is that everyone acts like this is some one-off, brilliant idea that SyFy so ingeniously programmed into their line-up. It’s not. It’s about as stale as the photos of McDonald’s cheeseburgers found on people’s shelves 20 years later.

Take a second to browse the IMDB credits for Asylum, the production company behind “Sharknado”, and you’ll see nothing short of 143 cash-grab titles. Cash-grab? Well, allegedly these movies aren’t make out of passion, and more often than not, are knock-offs of major motion pictures created to get dummies at video stores (or VOD channels) to accidentally rent it (see Atlantic Rim for the most recent example). Clearly, there are still people who work hard on the movies, and always strive to achieve something great, but the outcome is typically something along the lines of Jack the Giant Killer, Hansel & Gretel, Clash of the Empires, Hold Your Breath, Super Cyclone, Abraham Lincoln vs. Zombies, 2-Headed Shark Attack, The Amityville Haunting, Mega Python vs. Gatoroid, Mega Shark vs Crocosaurus, Mega Piranha and even Snakes on a Train.

But it’s not the quality of “Sharknado” that annoys me, or even the fact that it exists, it’s that everyone keep jabbing in my ear like I’m supposed to be impressed by how “good-bad” it is, like I’m some sort of jackass who didn’t enjoy Troll 2 growing up, discover Birdemic, or haven’t seen The Room – three films that earned the title of “Best-Worst Movie.” Why? Because the filmmakers were filled with passion and trying to create something special. You can’t strive to make a good-bad movie – that’s just not cool, or funny for that matter.

Thankfully, America is in love with “Sharknado”, so I get to hear all about a sequel when it comes out next year (although, it wouldn’t shock me if it’s released by October).

  • LaurenTaylor

    You make me proud to be a part of Bloody Disgusting. THANK YOU, sir.

  • snodawg666

    Hipster Bloody-Disgusting. You’re so cool.

  • Zombie-Killa

    “You can’t strive to make a good-bad movie – that’s just not cool, or funny for that matter.”

    Amen, Mr. D.

    I genuinely despise anything that comes out of The Asylum’s crap factory of horrors. Their movies are not funny in the slightest, and the production values are so pitifully bad it’s embarrassing. Paranormal Entity was the only Asylum spoof that came close to resembling something decent, and that’s it.

    But yeah, Sharknado won’t get any of my time. I keep hearing about how it’s a must-see awfully good movie, but there’s a difference between making a spoof with some real thought and effort, and well, just making a shit movie…..that’s a shit movie.

  • dr.lamb

    The title and the poster are good for a chuckle and that’s it. There are less and less “so bad it’s good” movies out there, especially in the B-movie sector. There is a bigger chance you see an A-movie that falls into that category nowadays.

  • coldblood

    Mr. Disgusting: No disrespect to you, Troll 2, Birdemic, or The Room – but Samurai Cop is the best-worst movie ever.

  • TwistedCritic

    I wholeheartedly agree. There’s nothing funny or charming about movies that are bad on purpose. Troll 2, by comparison, was made by a group of people who really thought they were making a legitimately scary horror flick, including a batshit crazy director who still seems to think he made a serious piece of art.

  • lilmarkuk

    I totally agree

    I love quiet a few good-bad movies that are not trying to be bad on a purpose lol

    these ones like sharknado are just bad-bad

  • GeneralUrsus

    This is what happens when a sub-culture aesthetic is mainstreamed & becomes appealing to the masses. Screw you, Mystery Science theater for chewing up, pre-digesting, & regurgitating B-movies for the masses, like a mama bird feeding her chicks. While I’m at it — screw you, Green Day, for mainstreaming punk.

    Still, the idea of a Sharknado captures the imagination with a compelling combination of the preposterous and the awesome, it transcends even its lamest possible execution. As Victor Hugo said, “You may resist the invasion of an army, but you cannot stop an idea whose time has come.” Sharknado now. Sharknado tomorrow. Sharknado forever. Maybe not.

  • Canucklehead

    People need to just watch the movie and shut up aboot it. Or don’t. I’ll wait.

  • ThunderDragoon

    “…it’s that everyone keep jabbing in my ear like I’m supposed to be impressed by how ‘good-bad’ it is” That’s the same way I feel about people talking about Troll 2. It’s fucking annoying. So in that sense, I see your point.