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[Dead Days Of Summer] ‘Alan Wake’ Series Giveaway!

Welcome to the Dead Days of Summer, where we try our best to give you something to play/read during the dreaded summer video game drought. Because who goes outside anymore?

Alas, poor Yorick. The Dead Days of Summer have reached their end. I knew them well. But they will not end with a whimper, but with a bang! And what provides a brighter bang than everyone’s favorite horror writer — okay, second favorite — Alan Wake. has bestowed upon us five codes for Alan Wake and its pseudo sequel American Nightmare, which we will be giving away today to five lucky readers.

Read on for details!

You guys seem to be fond of caption contests, so I figured we’d end this series with one of those. My favorite addition to the Alan Wake fiction came from American Nightmare, which introduced the giddy psychopath known as Mr. Scratch. He absolutely made that game, so today, we’re going to honor him.

What I want you to do is look at this lovely image:

And come up with a caption for it, which I’d like for you to post in the comments below. You can create as many as you like, just make sure you post one caption per comment.

Now set forth and make haste, dear reader! Make me proud.

Winners will be chosen a week from now, on Monday, July 29th.

For all the PC gaming goodness you can possibly handle, head on over to

Have a question? Feel free to ever-so-gently toss Adam an email, or follow him on Twitter and Bloody Disgusting.



  • Raziel_cz

    Really… I’m a psycho.

  • Raziel_cz

    Hi, I’m Mr. Scratch, welcome to Jackass!

  • Sick_skwerl

    I don’t always drink beer, but when I do, I like to do it out of a human skull.

  • Sick_skwerl

    Why does everyone keep asking if I am Uncle Jesse from Full House?!

  • Hitch

    Stay bloodthirsty, my friends.

  • iiSterlingRed

    How do we enter? Just comment?

  • iiSterlingRed

    Hi, my name is Mr. Scratch, ill be your guide thru this tour of insanity today -creepy smile-

  • don’t_cry

    This is my life, and my suit…go get your own!


    Oh I’m sorry, you have an itch?

  • bedbugz

    “Hey Alan, guess who took a big dump on someones favorite typewriter?”

  • bedbugz

    “Mmm…Alan, you forgot to put on underwear.”

  • WankingTheDead

    “Well, well, Alan, I’ve been expecting you.” -strokes cat-

  • MissUsagi

    “wanna know what happens to an eye ball when it gets punctured?”

    “The boogeyman is real, and you found him”

    “prepare your anus.”

    “you got a purty mouth Alan.”

    “Oh yes, there will be blood.”

  • GnawedDigits

    “I pooped a little.”

  • badhatharry

    Only Gyllenhaal Forgives

  • Naedtrax

    My body is ready.

  • chris99x

    Don’t worry, the chair is pleather.

  • Nasher

    Well Alan you bag of bones. You were an apt pupil even when you were just a body to me.

    I was always inside: your dark half, your talisman, the eyes of the dragon looking out when your insomnia and writers block was worst. even the doctors couldn’t help you sleep. Just after sunset, till four past midnight when it’s full dark with no stars and the night shift starts in your nightmares and dreamscapes, I was keeping you from misery, rage and desperation as I fed you needful things.

    A fertile mind ablaze, looking at the waste lands from your cell in a dark tower until I gave you shining inspiration. I am your firestarter when what was under the dome was in that dead zone.. I showed you a joyland.

    Make a stand Alan. You don’t have to be a running man getting thinner and thinner. Use that breathing method Christine taught you and you’ll get past these roadworks to be more than just a face in the crowd

    Is there something I Mist or should I Carrie on writing?

  • RoomOfAngel

    I don’t always sit in a couch, but when I do, RUN.

  • Karen

    Blood? I don’t see any blood. I’m quite sure I don’t know what you’re talking about.

  • Hitch

    With a set like this, “Scratch My Ass” is a lock for Best Art Direction at the AVN Awards.

  • Hitch

    When I asked to see a psychotherapist, this isn’t what I had in mind…

  • WombatButler

    That’s quite a marvelous member you have there. Come, let me show you something.

  • Riadon

    “I don’t always read online blogs but when I do I read”

  • mikekittle

    Chris Hansen and Dateline do not have anything on this if a predator enters the home; I’m the face behind hornyhoneybunny.

  • mikekittle

    Yes it is elmm hardwood flooring, thank you for noticing, no one seems to care much for my mad interior designing skills.

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