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5 Of The Dumbest Plans In Horror!!!

Let’s get something out of the way up front, I’m not necessarily condemning all of these movies. A few of them are great! But even great horror films are filled with characters who have ill-conceived plans (to out it mildly). Still, without the plans – there’d often be no movie!

So I come here to celebrate dumbness – not condemn it. Head below for 5 Of The Dumbest Plans In Horror!!!

Tommy Jarvis – Friday The 13th: Jason Lives

I flat out love this movie, it’s my favorite Friday The 13th. That being said, Tommy’s plan at the beginning is jaw droopingly stupid. If your entire plan is to dig up the corpse of the guy who tried to kill you just to make sure he’s dead, head directly back to the mental institution. You’re not done yet.

Mary Loomis – Psycho II

A notorious serial killer gets out of the mental hospital and your plan is to live with him and f*ck with his head? Congratulations genius! Considering everything that could have gone wrong, she got off easy by just getting shot by the cops.

Roman Bridger – Scream 3

Roman is actually a pretty smart guy in a lot of ways. After all, he’s talented enough to be the hottest young director in Hollywood. And he’s patient, I’ll give him that. His stupidity actually lives inside his predilection for convoluted plans. He goes through all that just to try to kill Sidney? I mean there’s got to be an easier way than upending all of tinseltown right? Extra dumb points are allocated here because he dragged the Scream series to its unquestionable low point.

Jack – Below Zero

Jack needs to finish his script so he locks himself away. That part’s fine. But he locks himself in a freezer. That part’s pretty f*cking stupid. The proof is sort of in the pudding with this one, since the screenwriter for this film actually locked herself in a freezer to write the script. It didn’t turn out as bad as could be expected I guess, but there’s one fatal flaw – the film still has a protagonist who locks himself in a freezer.

Zoey’s Boyfriend Henry – The Purge

Hey bro, I know you can technically kill anyone you want during “The Purge.” But, even if you hadn’t wound up dead, did you really think that was the way to your girlfriend’s heart? Killing her father before her very eyes? You’ve got a lot to learn about life, women and love sir. Congratulations on your plan!



  • EvanDickson

    FYI: Some of these appeared in a list yesterday. However, that list may have hit a bit closer to real social issues than it should have. Since the point of these lists it to have fun – I’ve changed it.

  • dr.lamb

    “Loomis” is maybe the most overused “reference names” of horror movies.

    • EvanDickson

      True! But I wonder if PSYCHO II was intentional. It seems like it came out before movies really started doing that. it’s possible though!

      • dr.lamb

        I looked it up. The original “Psycho” was the first to use it. The chick from Psycho 2 is the daughter of the sister of victim No1 in the first movie, so it gets a pass. “Halloween”, “Scream” and a bunch of others then reference the name.

      • GoreFaceSupreme

        WTF? She’s related to Sam Loomis from the original Psycho. And then Carpenter used it in Halloween. Come on!

        • dr.lamb

          I know, I know… shame on me. Just let us never talk about it again….;)

          • EvanDickson

            Same lol

  • I would have to nominate Saw 3.

    I love the movie, but Jigsaw was supposed to be this mastermind/genius, right? Well, why would you plot to (and his accomplice, Amanda) kidnap someone to perform BRAIN SURGERY of all things, a surgery that’s supposed to save your life, without the proper tools and resources? That didn’t make any sense at all.

    And in the 2011 Thing remake/prequel, didn’t Mary Elizabeth Winstead’s character put out an order to disable all the vehicles? I’m like 90% sure, because my memory is a little bit hazy. Haven’t seen it in a while. Anyway, I get the point of stopping The Thing, but disabling your only means of escape? That’s just fucking stupid. Remember how everyone panicked in Carpenter’s Thing after Blair destroyed the chopper? Yeah, you don’t destroy your only chance(s) of survival.

  • diapers

    Tommy Jarvis gets a double F-minus for choosing to bring Horshack along for the exhumation.

  • pyrepunk

    Hell you could have written the whole article with stupid ideas that The Purge had…That movie had the best potential and it turned out so pitiful…

  • Rake

    Tommy Jarvis’ plan was to dig Jason up and burn him. Considering how many times before Jason was killed and came back, I don’t think it was a bad idea. The execution of his plan was sloppy. His second plan to go out in a boat in the middle of crystal lake and lasso Jason to a giant boulder is the plan I’d reject. That was a silly plan but it worked for a minute. However, his first plan makes sense because burning Jason to ashes would solve the problem. His second plan is the equivalent of leaving Jason buried, there is still a Jason, he’s just in crystal lake instead of underground. So Tommy’s agenda makes no sense in the end, as is proven by part 7.

    • greg

      Huh? Jason was never killed until Tommy killed him in part 4. He never actually drowned, he was only thought to have drowned(explained in part 2), part 2,3+4 all took place over three days, and he never died until Tommy plunged the machete into Jason’s head at the end of final chapter. Part 6 is the FIRST time he came back to life.

      I agree completely though that the tying him to a rock thing was just unbelievably stupid, and made no sense whatsoever.

      • MrMyers

        Why does everybody think that it was explained in part 2 that he never drowned?It never says that in the film.
        Its hinted at by a character that knows nothing about it.
        Paul says that he supposedly drown and they didnt find his body.
        Nobody says that he didnt drown.
        And in my opinion he died at the end of part 3 aswell.
        He gets taken to the morgue.
        Even the makers of part 3 say hes supposed to be dead.
        Joseph Zito even says part 4 starts with a dead Jason.

      • Rake

        I would suggest watching 2-4 again. each film ends with him taking on damage that no one could survive. And generally they take a pulse before taking someone to the morgue. The first film also shows he drowned.

        • MrMyers

          Nice to know im not the only one with this opinion.Your the man Rake!!

  • Krug09

    GREAT ARTICLE!!! Yeah, below zero sounds fucking dumb! The Purge is a silly ass movie and what a dumb ass plan that kid had. All he said was he would talk to her father, i am guessing everyone in the family would not be happy with that dumb ass fuck!!!

  • VictorCrowley

    I’ve always thought Scream 3’s plot was retarded. Poor all the way around and an anticlimactic villain reveal. I thought for sure it was gonna be Sid’s dad, which would’ve been more fitting than writing in some guy to play Sid’s surprise brother we’ve never heard mention of in the previous films. Just cheap, dumb, and effectively killed the franchise.

    Friday 6 at least made some sense. Tommy Jarvis had been having hallucinations of Jason Voorhees since he had been a child. So, it wouldn’t be a huge stretch to suggest he thinks he can get some kind of closure on the ordeal by seeing his corpse for himself and destroying it, eliminating the fear he has of him coming back. For me, the only off-the-wall stupid thing that happened (aside from a lighting bolt resurrecting Jason) was the movie suggesting two guys with shovels would be able to dig a giant, six-foot deep hole in a couple hours. NOT!

  • As far as The Purge goes, Evan’s example is the main reason why it’s hard to buy into the heavily flawed concept of The Purge: Instead of killing for the good of mankind in some kind of sick and twisted cleansing mission, people will inevitably succumb to their own desires to kill for selfish reasons.

    And what’s going to stop people from killing, when The Purge is over? Once The Purge started in the movie, I had a hard time suspending disbelief into believing something like this could ACTUALLY work. Sounds like a clever idea at first, but when you dissect it down to the core, The Purge is loaded with too many nonsensical problems.

  • mobstar67

    dumb plans
    Shaggy the 90lb beatnik stoner always had to go into the haunted mansion with the dumb ass dog Scooby Doo. never a smart plan. meanwhile Freddie who’s big and buff has the smart chick Velma out front looking for clues while he doing who knows what with the hot one “Daffney”…a much better plan..

  • Lord-Alaster

    The “do the right thing plan” from feast 2 was pretty stupid!

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