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[BEST & WORST ‘13] Bree Ogden’s Top 5 Comic Book Kills Of 2013

When you’re a horror comic critic, bloody deaths are a dime a dozen. But every once in a while, there is a kill so dastardly thought provoking that it completely changes the game.

My favorite kills of 2013 combine both utter gore and emotional awe. In horror comics, a kill doesn’t register on my “profound radar” unless it signifies something greater than the comic itself. It’s not just about blood and violence, it’s the meaning behind the blood and violence.

Lonmonster (Best) | Jimbus_Christ (Best Debut Issues) | Jorge Solis (Best) | Shadow Jayd (Best Covers) | GreenBasterd (Best) | Brady (Best OGNs/Ongoings) | Bree Ogden (Best Kills)

5. Escape From Jesus Island #1 (Wisdumb Productions), Russell Gets Bashed

Death abounds in the first issue of Escape From Jesus Island, but the best kill in this horrifically outlandish look at inhumane splicing/genetic experiments is that of classic self-centered twit, Russell, a schmactivist visiting the island to stop the animal cruelty.

Prior to his gruesome death, we see what appears to be a half human (literally “halved” human, as in, no legs) waxing poetic about eyeballs being the perfect treat because there are “no sharp bones to choke [him].” This is one of my favorite instances of foreshadowing. It’s subtle, which is hard to pull off in such an utterly unsubtle comic.

Shortly after our halved human gushes over tasty eyeballs, Russell gets his face bashed in so hard his eyeballs go flying. Perhaps the most disturbing part of his death is when the halved human offers to share Russell’s eyeballs with his terrified friends.

4. Lot 13 #3 (DC Entertainment), Dad’s Bloody Pulp of a Head

I’m fairly certain no one saw this one coming. It’s not just the manner of death that makes this kill so awesome but also the mere fact that it occurred in the first place.

In “Lot 13” issue #1, the Wyatt family sits on trial. Dead. Their blown out heads covered with burlap sacks—save for their father—whose head is visible and half gone. As if one death isn’t bad enough, they are subsequently deemed guilty of sins against God and therefore crowd-beaten, dragged, and brutally tossed into a shallow grave. Which, you know, naturally makes sense (sarcasm), because it’s 1670 and the law is to punish those for their sins, dead or alive.

In present day, an all-American family is traveling to their new home but wind up trapped in a haunted apartment building (presumably in the location of the Wyatt family trial). And because “evil stays where evil dies” (says one of the haunts), Ron, all-American father, ends up on trial for trespassing. Only it’s a supernatural trial led by the outrageously vile dead judge from 1670.

The kill comes in the form of a blow to the head with a gigantic mallet, sending globs of pulpy blood, brain, skull, and hair flying outward, leaving nothing left of his head. All the while, his confused and terrified family watches in horror. It’s a jaw dropping death, to say the least. This kill sets the comic in motion, readying the plot for some proactive slaughtering.

3. Colder #5 (Dark Horse), Nimble Jack Finally Gets His

Nimble Jack has been acrobatically and psychotically killing people for decades, feeding on their insanity once they’ve died. So naturally, his final death scene is wonderfully played out.

Not only is he torn to bloody shreds by his own gigantic and beastly dogs (hardly dogs—they look like the byproduct of a zombie and a werewolf) but then his own insanity is feasted upon by our hero, Declan Thomas, a former victim of Nimble.

The justice of this death is nothing short of perfection. And the irony of poor Nimble’s fate is delightfully sound.

2. Criminal Macabre: The Eyes of Frankenstein #1 (Dark Horse), Explosive Birth

Never have I laughed so hard at a comic book death. I literally (using “literally” correctly) did a spit-take when I read this death.

We open up on a very angry, very distressed, very pregnant woman in labor. She’s screaming, she’s unhappy, she wishes death upon everyone in the room, sweetly declares her love to her unborn baby and then BOOM!

Yea, BOOM.

She quite literally explodes as a result of childbirth. Causing every girl in the world who is already fearful of giving birth (THIS girl) to officially decide never to have unprotected sex, ever.

Aside from the psychological ramifications of this kill (I consider it a kill… murderous little baby…) it’s genuinely beautiful. I think that’s when you know you’re a horror fiend—when you find an explosion of blood and guts beautiful.

It is insane, shocking, terrifying, and a great way to start off a horror comic series. But more than anything, it’s ridiculously unique. Find me another comic with an explosive birth and I will eat this keyboard I’m typing on.

1. The Memory Collectors #1 (IDW/44Flood), Fetish Models With Weapons

They wear latex like no one else. They fight in heels like no one else. And they detect true evil like no one else. These fetish models-turned-vigilantes can see through the human visage, penetrating deep enough into the psyche in order to see the evil underneath. A skill they are highly trained in.

“He knows we can see him. The true him.”

Edith needs to complete her first solo kill and complete it she does. This is, hands down, my favorite comic book kill of 2013. What appears to be an attractive, albeit dark man, morphs before our eyes so that we are able to see what Edith can see. Evil. He’s easily three times her height with menacing claws and mad fighting skills. But with swift expertise, Edith crouches, jumps, flies through the air and beheads that sucker with a single swing of her blade.

Because of Menton3’s artistic style, you feel as if you are watching this happen in motion as opposed to viewing still images. So when Menton3 illustrates a fetish model and an evil entity fighting in mid-air, ending in the sexiest kill of 2013, you can’t help but want more and more and more.



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