Admittedly, I’ve never seen the appeal of tattoos. That said, living in the part of Toronto known as The Annex for the past four years has granted me an opportunity to see just what people today are putting on their bodies. Some of the stuff is pretty cool, while others I think lacked foresight into just what they paid someone to do. And don’t get me started on the subdermal stuff. Directors and co-writers Kenny Gage and Devon Downs decided to take the practice to the extreme with Anarchy Parlor, while throwing in a bit of Eli Roth’s Hostel for good measure. The result definitely gets under your skin in several ways (sorry).

On a graduation trip in Lithuania, a group of Americans decide on a stopover in the city of Vilnius for party time. While at a club, Amy (Tiffany DeMarco) and Brock (Ben Whalen) meet up with the heavily-inked Uta (Sara Fabel), who invites them to get tattooed at a parlor where she works. There, Amy and Brock meet Artist (Robert LaSardo), who promises Amy the tattoo of her dreams. Unbeknownst to the Americans, Artist is more interested in their actual skin, and overtakes the two for later nefarious deeds. The rest of the American troupe set out to find Amy and Brock, but now have to navigate the resistance put up by the hostile locals.

With Roth’s Hostel, we had a group of ignorant American tourists who waltzed into a foreign country, acted like pricks and paid for it with decidedly squeamish results. In Anarchy Parlor, it doesn’t stray that far from the concept, so those of you who dig torture porn are in luck. Scalpel meets skin a lot in this one, and in typical torture porn fashion, the whole thing is drawn out in agonizing detail. The effects are quite well done during these parts, with only a few shots of blatantly-obvious CGI in the non-skinning scenes. I will warn in advance that there are instances of victims wetting themselves during the skinning scenes, and like the skinning itself, is fixated upon by the camera. Thankfully, there’s good cinematography with this one, as well as some great atmosphere that only heightens the squeamish visuals. Nicely done.

Also, Gage and Downs give the man behind the gory happenings some substance. Film vet LaSardo goes the calm and collected route with his role as The Artist. It’s definitely more off-putting to have an antagonist that’s mild-mannered and deliberate than a crazy, over-the-top villain. Of course, it also helps that LaSardo looks the part with his shaven head, tattooed upper body and emotionless face. As for our protagonists, the acting quality is inconsistent. DeMarco is okay as Amy, but the rest of the group don’t lend themselves to much sympathy from the viewer, as guys like Whalen and do the jerk thing a little too well, coupled with overacting and copious amounts of “dude” and “f*ck”. Needless to say, the film doesn’t take itself too seriously.

The lack of developed protagonists outside of Amy hurts Anarchy Parlor. As mentioned, the disposable dialogue peppered with expletives doesn’t give the audience much to side with as the torture commences. It also doesn’t help that the protagonists are oft to doing cliched stupid tourist stuff (such as starting fights with the locals). It also doesn’t take much a stretch to see that Gage and Downs borrowed a little too much from Hostel. Roth made Hostel‘s premise of foreigners backpacking across Europe and getting caught in a paid-to-torture ring plausible. Anarchy Parlor‘s premise of a group of college students going to Lithuania of all places for vacation makes about as much sense as going partying in Lithuania. And, not being spoilerish, while The Artist’s motivations behind what he does make sense, the end results of his endeavours nullify his actions. Really, is this what all of these folks are dying over?

Anarchy Parlor is another one of those films that will end up dividing horror fans. Those who went nuts for Hostel and the subsequent wave of torture porn films will be definitely have much to enjoy with this one. LaSardo definitely makes for an interesting antagonist that keeps the film from venturing into being too over-the-top. Those fans who aren’t so keen on the fixation of drawn-out gory torture won’t be won over with the lackluster acting by the characters we’re supposed to be rooting for, nor the derivative premise. Myself, I’m not into the subgenre, but I can see that Gage and Downs have talent behind them. So while I pass on visiting this parlor, I’m interested in seeing what they have next.