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Lost Boys The Thirst (V)

“While there is a lot to like about this sequel, it adds nothing new to the genre. The Thirst is a basic horror comedy vampire procedural.”

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The Frog brothers are back together for the first time since 1987 in the third installment of the Lost Boys franchise. After the abortion of a film that is The Tribe, many horror fans (myself included) were decidedly cautious about The Thirst. Is it even worth another go? Should fans stick with the original? Pretend the sequels weren’t made? Well, surprisingly The Thirst is a lot of bloody goofy fun.

Edgar Frog is down on his luck. With most of his close friends dead or turned, his rent past due, and little to no discernable skills outside of a grufftastic voice, it’s safe to say the Edgar has seen better days. Enter Stephanie Meyer, err, Gwen Lieber, a writer of crappy romantic vampire novels, whose brother was kidnapped by real vampires. The kind that don’t sparkle. Gwen recruits the old vampire hunter and a rag-tag crew including a douchebag reality actor and a comic book clerk to help save her little brother.

While the vampires aren’t as worthless as they are in Twilight books, they are by no means frightening or badass. The lead vampire is a big-time DJ who is still into raves. In fact, it’s his big rave in San Cazador that serves as climax of the film. Hey, 1999 called and it wants it glow sticks back. The vampires are also into skydiving, some of them do this while wearing 5-inch heels. As grandpa would say (if he was still around), “If there’s one thing I hate about San Cazador, it’s all the damn skydiving vampires.”

The best moments come from Feldman’s over-the-top cheesy dialogue. The film is presented with much less gravitas than the prior sequel. And that’s a good thing. Feldman’s character in the first film was mostly comic relief. It only makes sense that the film should have plenty of fun with him in the lead role. And the Feldster does deliver several great lines. One of my personal favorites being, “Vampires are like ten times stronger than grizzly bears.” His comedic timing is spot on and his random grunts are sure to please.

If you are looking for gore and boobs, The Thirst delivers both in spades. Plenty of blood flows, squirts, and oozes all over the screen. The deaths are pretty decent and feature everything from live heart removal to weird spikey grenade thing. Yes, Edgar brings plenty of new “toys” to play with at the vampire killing party. And as mentioned, several sets of breasts are freed from the tyranny of the shirt.

While there is a lot to like about this sequel, it adds nothing new to the genre. The Thirst is a basic horror comedy vampire procedural. Some of the acting is lame as well as almost the entire plot. But, unlike the abomination that was The Tribe, this film recaptures some of what made the The Lost Boys such an enjoyable watch. Not a whole lot of it, mind you, but just enough to make it worthy of a view.

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Julia Garner Joins Horror Movie ‘Weapons’ from the Director of ‘Barbarian’

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'Apartment 7A' - Filming Wraps on ‘Relic’ Director's Next Starring “Ozark’s” Julia Garner!
Pictured: Julia Garner in 'We Are What We Are'

In addition to Leigh Whannell’s upcoming Universal Monsters movie Wolf Man, Julia Garner (The Royal Hotel) has also joined the cast of Weapons, THR has announced tonight.

Weapons is the new horror movie from New Line Cinema and director Zach Cregger (Barbarian), with Julia Garner joining the previously announced Josh Brolin (Dune 2).

The upcoming Weapons is from writer/director Zach Cregger, who will also produce alongside his Barbarian producing team: Roy Lee of Vertigo and J.D. Lifshitz and Raphael Margules of BoulderLight Pictures. Vertigo’s Miri Yoon also produces.

The Hollywood Reporter teases, “Plot details for Weapons are being kept holstered but it is described as a multi and inter-related story horror epic that tonally is in the vein of Magnolia, the 1999 actor-crammed showcase from filmmaker Paul Thomas Anderson.”

Cregger was a founding member and writer for the New York comedy troupe “The Whitest Kids U’Know,” which he started while attending The School of Visual Arts. The award-winning group’s self-titled sketch comedy show ran for five seasons on IFC-TV and Fuse. He was also a series regular on Jimmy Fallon’s NBC series “Guys with Kids” and the TBS hit series “Wrecked,” and was featured in a recurring role on the NBC series “About a Boy.”

Weapons will be distributed worldwide by Warner Bros. Pictures.

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