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[Review] “Scream Queens” ‘Beware Of Young Girls’ They’ll Rip Your Heart Out

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Now that baseball is over we can get back to our snarky bitchy Tuesday night viewing. This week on “Scream Queens” Ariana Grande made a guest appearance as dead Chanel #2, Gigi revealed herself to be even crazier than we thought (yeah, sure you’re not “touched in the head”), Dean Munsch is straight Single White Female crazy, and Grace and Pete continue to be the least interesting part of the show.

We open on a funeral for Chanel #2 (Grande) and Chanel #1 narrating her disdain for the fallen sister. She’s glad she’s dead and she doesn’t care who knows it, especially since Chanel #2 was sleeping with Chad Radwell, who will sincerely miss porking her. After the funeral the Chanel’s gather around a Ouija board to ask Chanel #2 some questions and find out who the killer is. After the board seemingly works, Chanel #2 pegs Chanel #1 as the killer causing the rest of the group, lead by #6, to decide Chanel must die. After all, they are all guilty of being involved with Chad Radwell behind Chanel’s back.

Scream Queens

Any episode that features Chanel #4 and #5 predominately automatically makes me smile. I can’t get over how hilarious Abigail Breslin and Billie Lourd are both together and separate. The girls consider various plans to kill Chanel but can’t seem to agree on either grinding up her diamonds and feeding them to her at a sugar party (this is not a thing, I refuse to believe it is) and Breslin’s overly complicated plans crack me up.Any episode that features Chanel #4 and #5 predominately automatically makes me smile. I can’t get over how hilarious Abigail Breslin and Billie Lourd are both together and separate. The girls consider various plans to kill Chanel but can’t seem to agree on either grinding up her diamonds and feeding them to her at a sugar party (this is not a thing, I refuse to believe it is) and Breslin’s overly complicated plans crack me up.

Their plan is foiled when Chanel #2 comes back from the grave in a dream(?) sequence to reveal hell is not all it’s cracked up to be and to warn Chanel what her cohorts are up to. Of course, she confronts them and gains their trust back with material goods in true Chanel fashion. But we all know from the past that these girls are out for blood, figuratively or not, and can’t be entirely trusted to be back on Chanel’s side. My only issue with this sequence is introducing the possibility of supernatural occurrences. I will take the campy attitude and over the top dialogue but I have to draw a line somewhere and that line is introducing the idea of a spirit world that could be a really big plot killer. I’m going to just assume it was a dream and that the Ouija board was being controlled by the Chanels.

SQ quija

After a week off I was happy to join the show again and for me it seemed to be much funnier than the last couple of episodes. It also gave us more background on Dean Munsch, which may have been superfluous to everything else, but I will take any and all extra time with Jamie Lee Curtis. In fact, one of the more clever references I thought was the use of “Beware of Young Girls” by Dory Previn. The song’s title is the title of this week’s episode and comes to a head at the end of the episode with Munsch dancing around to it revealing that she did, in fact, kill her husband because of his affair with former KKT member Feather. Previn wrote the song after her husband had an affair with Mia Farrow, whom Feather looks almost identical to. Curtis is the absolute best part of this show and her tumble down psycho hill makes me smile.

Finally my least favorite aspect of the show, Grace, and Pete. I don’t dislike either character and I certainly don’t understand the hate for Grace’s hats (I mean why? They are just hats…) but these two are extremely uninteresting compared to the rest of the characters. Pete’s Matthew McConaghuey’s accent was entertaining once but using it as a running gag makes me want to punch him in the teeth. Also, are we just going to forget about his former obsession with Chanel and chalk it up to a lazy red herring or will that come back into play?

“Beware of Young Girls” cements what I had been thinking the whole time. This show is not about Grace’s journey to becoming some kind of final girl it’s about the idea of everyone being certifiable. Yeah, it could have been a paint by numbers whodunit with some snark thrown in but it’s focus is on the crazy and absurd which is fine by me.

And speaking of absurd, where is Denise Hemphill? I know most of you hate her, but I’ve been missing her these past few weeks.

Favorite Lines:

“Didn’t you see the movie?”
“The movie Ouija? No! No one did!”

“I don’t trust a girl with a big bush of pubic hair. Makes me think she’s got something to hide.”

*On the subject of hell and the lack of dinosaurs* “We know, Jesus broke in and stole them.”

“I was probably in a bad mood because Adolph Hitler was motor-boating my boobs.”

Jess is a Northeast Ohio native who has loved all things horror and fringe since birth. She has a tendency to run at the mouth about it and decided writing was the only way not to scare everyone away. If you make a hobby into a career it becomes less creepy. Unless that hobby is collecting baby dolls. Nothing makes that less creepy.

Books

‘In Search of Darkness’ Book Review: A Must-Have for ’80s Horror Fans

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In 2019, the documentary of 80s horror In Search of Darkness became an instant hit with horror fans. Now, a beautiful coffee table style companion book is available and is a must-own for all fans of one of horror’s greatest eras. The book is a walk down the horror aisle of the best mom and pop video store in the heyday of VHS, featuring full color photos, poster art, insightful essays and more. More than just a nostalgic throwback, In Search of Darkness is the kind of book I wish I’d had back in my years as a burgeoning horror fan but is also satisfying for the film fanatic I have become in the years since.

The format is beautifully and simply laid out, with at least a dozen (usually more) movies from each year of the decade presented in order of release accompanied by informative and insightful essays by the authors Heather Wixson and Patrick Bromley. Both authors have been mainstays of film journalism, specializing in horror, for many years. Wixson began her career in 2007 with Dread Central and has spent the past ten years as the Managing Editor of Daily Dead, from which she recently retired to focus on books and other projects. She has devoted the past several years to interviewing and writing books about the Make-up and Special Effects wizards that have brought so much to film over the years, specifically the horror genre.

Bromley is a film journalist and critic whose work can be found all over the place including right here on Bloody Disgusting. He recently provided the commentary for the Vinegar Syndrome release of The Texas Chainsaw Massacre 2 and is known as something of a Tobe Hooper expert. He is also the founder and editor of F this Movie!, an eclectic film website, and host of its accompanying podcast. So, to be clear, the authors know their stuff.

Wixson and Bromley divide writing duties roughly in half and though each has a distinctive voice, their writing styles dovetail beautifully into a cohesive whole. Each author plays to their strengths. Being familiar with both their work I didn’t even have to look at the bylines to know that Heather covered Christine and Terror in the Aisles and Patrick took on The Funhouse and Hollywood Chainsaw Hookers. Wixson’s passion for make-up effects is clear and comes through in many of her contributions. In general, Wixson takes on the “big” titles, the movies that defined the decade the most, and Bromley covers what the more cynical among us might call schlock, but he would likely call pure cinematic bliss. There are exceptions and surprises, of course, as there should be (Patrick covers The Shining for example). Each essay dives into the history behind the film, the major players involved, the reception, and legacy with often surprising aspects drawn from interviews with the filmmakers from various sources and insights from the authors.

For all their in-depth explorations of each film, in general the authors keep their critics’ hats safely stowed, keeping in mind that every entry on the book has its fans. In fact, they may well have sold me on finally hitting play on some of the schlockier offerings of the decade like Evilspeak, Nightbeast, and Blood Diner. Hell, I may even give The Beast Within a spin for shits and giggles. The point is that this book is a celebration through and through. The authors are honest about the critical receptions of the films, which were often unkind, and sometimes let their own opinions shine through, but recognize how beloved even the schlockiest films can become given time and availability. And that is an ongoing theme of In Search of Darkness. What may have been dismissed in its day often becomes revered as the years pass. Variations on the phrase “the years have been kind to…” referring to various maligned projects like The Thing, Halloween III: Season of the Witch, The Blob and many, many others, can be found throughout the book for good reason.

Each chapter of the book also includes a rundown of the top horror movies at the box office for the year as well as the top movies of all genres for context. The final page for each year highlights some of the major news and pop culture events including the top songs, albums, and television shows. There is a large central section that pays tribute to the talent involved with the greatest horror films of the 80s including directors, actors, effects artists, and more. This section includes brief biographies of John Carpenter, Wes Craven, Stephen King, Tom Savini, Barbara Crampton, Robert Englund, and many others presented in a dynamic and engaging fashion.

One of the beauties of the book is that it covers so much ground. Sure, you’ll find Friday the 13th, A Nightmare on Elm Street, Hellraiser, and the Halloween sequels in it, but you’ll also find deeper cuts like The Changeling, The Being, and Tetsuo: The Iron Man. I was happy to find the same love given to Frank Henenlotter and Larry Cohen as to George A. Romero and David Cronenberg. In other words, In Search of Darkness is extraordinarily eclectic, highlighting the diversity that truly defined what is often viewed as a homogenous decade. The authors make the case that the 80s was horror’s greatest decade, and with what they lay out throughout this book, it’s tough to argue against that. I even came across a film or two I hadn’t even heard of before, which has become increasingly rare as the years go by.

At just shy of $85, the cover price may give some horror hounds pause, but believe me, it’s worth every penny. This is a beautiful volume that every fan of 80s horror will want on their shelf or prominently displayed on their coffee table. Filled with favorite titles, hundreds of full color photos, insightful and informative writing, this is simply a must own.

You can order your copy now.

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