[Official Review] ‘Dear God No!’ A Throwback That Lacks Depth

Reviewed by Mike Ferraro

What a film. Dear God No is a throwback genre film bringing us back to the glory days of Grindhouse cinema. Writer/director James Bickert made the brilliant choice of shooting this film on actual 16mm film – a giant step in the right direction of filmmaking! As you’re watching, you can’t help but miss the format. It’s not like digital cinema has cinematography as a whole. It’s just so painfully obvious how it all lacks a certain depth. With this film, it’s nice to see things like how the foreground separates from the background, a little bit of grain covering the whole image throughout the entire picture, and how the lighting looks way more realistic.

But that is about all for which we can really praise.

Dear God No tells the story of a Jett (Jett Bryant), the leader of a devil-worshipping motorcycle gang, who spend their time raping nuns and murdering people. The group decides to pick on a group of wealthy college types at a cabin in the middle of the woods.

In this cabin, Dr. Marco (Paul McComisky) has been dabbing a bit with trying to cure the dead (most notably, his dead wife). With that, however, also comes a giant sasquatch-like creature, roaming the woods and knocking off heads of passersby. So when the undead wife comes from out of the basement as this gang prepares themselves to rape a pregnant lady, they just see it as another opportunity to rape someone else. If Dead Girl taught us anything cinematically, it’s that thou shall not rape that which no longer lives.

Since the Tarantino/Rodriguez created Grindhouse double-feature from a few years ago, filmmakers far and wide have created films of that ilk to keep the genre going. Only a few of them have really succeeded (like Hobo With a Shotgun and maybe Bad Ass) and the others just try too hard. Dear God No definitely falls into that latter category. The harder the filmmaker tries to shock us – and there are moments – the easier it becomes to not care about what we are seeing. It’s one thing to shock for a purpose but it is another to shock for no reason whatsoever, simply because you are trying to tap into certain genre requirements.

The DVD is chocked full of special features regarding the making of the film. It even contains traces of its marketing campaign – most notably, specific genre related spots (torture porn, zombie). We are also blessed with 2 commentaries – filmmaker and actor – if you are so inclined to sit through this film a couple of more times. That is not going to be an easy task.

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42nd Street Forever

Synapse Films’ best-selling 42nd Street Forever series has been a favorite of grindhouse and exploitation fans around the world. This colossal best of collection combines a selection of vintage theatrical trailers from the first two volumes of the series and mixes them up with some all-new selections! Remastered in true 1080p high definition, this mind-numbing dose of classic original coming attractions will have your Blu-ray player exploding with more than three and a half hours of sex, exploitation, action, horror and science-fiction advertisements from around the world! Can your brain take all this sleaze in one sitting?

Blu-ray Review: ‘Hobo With A Shotgun’

I get what director Jason Eisner was trying to accomplish with Hobo With A Shotgun. Really, I do. It revels in anarchy, contains the sort of ultra-violence that would make Alex DeLarge blush and seems to sweat sleaze from every pore. And yet, the feature length adaptation of the Grindhouse faux trailer contest winner is lacking in a way that can’t be explained away with the “…but it’s supposed to be bad!” excuse. Eisner might have had the best of intentions with his poorly plotted film loaded with bad, unfunny dialogue, but do the characters have to yell at me the entire time like I did something wrong?
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