On July 7, 2011, I published what may very well be the finest 1,256 words I’ve ever written. It was a love letter review of an elusive new flavor of Dew inspired by the woefully underappreciated black grape and infused with the essence of Halloween. That Dew was Mountain Dew Pitch Black.

This is the first soda to earn my fear and my respect. I fear it because of what it did to me one crisp autumn morning back in 2012. It was a Wednesday I’ll never forget. My very own Pitch Black Wednesday.

The day before the horrific incident, an exceptional friend of mine had gifted me two twelve packs of the tasty beverage, earning a place in my heart forever and ever. I plowed through half the cans in no time at all, then, it happened. I had to pee super bad. Like, Jim Carrey in a dog-shaped van bad.

I made it to the bathroom with minimal seepage, like a professional adult, and proceeded to hastily uncoil the beast so I could begin. It didn’t take long for me to realize he was spitting out a sickly green sewage water that lacked the subtle luminescence and warm amber hues I usually see. I came frighteningly close to being traumatized for life that day had I not acted fast and sought answers on Google.

I’m better now, but I am still pretty shaken up about it.

The reason I’m telling you this is so you can better understand what this supremely satisfying soda means to me, as well as what it could mean to you, if you open the still-functioning (for now) arteries of your heart to it.

Mountain Dew Pitch Black is as much a proprietary blend of chemicals and sugar designed by a team of scientists wearing Dew branded lab coats as you and I are people-shaped skin bags filled with meat. It’s so much more than the sum of its parts, just like us. It’s what I imagine Charlie Sheen’s tiger blood tastes like, only better. It’s so delicious, thousands of black grapes willingly volunteer themselves to be drained of their precious juices so they can be reborn as the greatest of mankind’s carbonated inventions.

Prince even dedicated an album to it! Surely you’re sold by now.

You can find out for yourself whether or not Pitch Black is for you by visiting a beverage retailer of your choosing and giving it a try. Go ahead, taste it. Come on, put it in your mouth, you know you want to. Everyone else is, so you should to unless you want to be weird and die alone. What have you got to lose, besides your health or whatever?

Pitch Black is only here for a limited time, unless we enlist Lady Democracy to keep it here until the end of time. As much as I like Baja Blast, it can fuck off back to Taco Bell. There can only be one, and unless that one is Keanu Reeves, it better be Mountain Dew Pitch Black.

Unfortunately, it’s an insanely tight race, with only 1% — one goddamn percent — separating the two. I’m not saying everyone who votes for Baja Blast should die in a fire, but you should vote for Pitch Black.

#VOTEPITCHBLACK

The post Pitch Black is Back, Y’all appeared first on Bloody Disgusting!.

Here’s a rhetorical question: is there anything more American than swaddling the PS4 I waited to buy specifically so I could get a white one in a tasteful walnut shell, emblazoned with the fierce face of a bald eagle that silently judges me for neglecting my patriotic duties every time I try to get my video game fix? No, there obviously isn’t.

I’m kidding. Only a deranged individual would put a bird on a gaming console, so I settled on the Bloody Disgusting logo, because there’s nothing deranged about a human skull in mid-devastation by a saw blade. Some proof:

Make sure the volume’s cranked up on your computer or you’ll miss the choir of angels singing the PlayStation theme that plays when the console is switched on, and if you’re using a 4K monitor, you should see a seemingly sourceless ray of heavenly light that gently illuminates the console in an otherworldly glow. That, my friends, is what your visually impaired console could look like, so long as you’re willing to pretty it up a bit, a la Freddie Prinze Jr. in She’s All That.

You might not get it, and that’s okay. The point is, Toast does.

Toast started out with a man, a dream, and a modestly successful crowdfunding campaign. Today, it’s a rapidly growing online retailer run by a team of 10. The engraving process, which involves lasers and burning, is what inspired the name.

The site offers a myriad pre-designed cases that come in a variety of colors, styles and materials, including genuine leather (colored or natural) and various woods (ash, walnut, bamboo, ebony). You can also submit your own design, as I did, and they’ll slap it on a case of your choosing.

The quality of the materials is certainly impressive, as is the incredible amount of detail they’re able to retain in the engraving. Nothing was lost in the transition, as far as I can tell. Every gruesome detail of the original design seems to be intact.

When my PS4’s new wooden wardrobe arrived, I set about applying the sticky side of each piece to the console’s woefully plain exterior. It didn’t take long, maybe five minutes, and the result was transformative. I will note that for the PS4 or any other gadget that has an interface as small as the console’s power and eject buttons, the shell can make it somewhat tricky to get at them.

I suspect this won’t be a problem for most. It’s barely a problem for me. But if you have a little extra girth to your digits, you might want to keep it in mind.

Finding the right case for your gadget isn’t easy, nor should it be taken lightly. No sane person would ever wear a shirt that didn’t compliment their eyes so they pop. All Toast has done is take that rule and apply it to the world of technology. They’re ahead of the game, I say.

When the machines we take for granted inevitably rise against us, Toast will be there, providing General Siri and the legions of murderbots I assume she’ll command with bold accessories made from natural materials. Eventually, they’ll probably have to start using human skin, but we don’t need to get into that right now.

For more on Toast and the post-apocalyptic future they’ll soon capitalize on, head over here.

The post Toast is Ridding the World of Ugly Gadgets appeared first on Bloody Disgusting!.

I’m telling you all of this so you’ll better understand why I love the Sumo Omni Plus. One of the latest additions to Sumo Lounge’s growing line of soft things I want to live on — and live on one I did, when I used my Sumo Gigantor in the place of a bed for a full college semester. The Gigantor may be my favorite of the products they’ve sent me to review over the years, but the Omni Plus definitely gives it a run for its money.

This is because it’s essentially a giant pillow, and as I said before, I love me some pillows.

Almost any pillow is a friend of mine. Big pillows, small pillows, body pillows, pillows shaped like the people who have wronged me over the years — if you aren’t a fan of them, I suggest you get on that. The only pillow I don’t get along with is the throw pillow. Those uncomfortable bags of broken dreams should be thrown at your enemies, not used as cheap decorations.

Oh yeah, the Omni Plus. If the name sounds familiar, you may be remembering the Sumo Omni Reloaded, an adjustable chair thing I reviewed back in November. I liked the concept, but the execution could use some work. It’s really only worth it when they drop the price make it feel a little more solid.

If the Omni line is Sumo’s experimental branch, then the Omni Plus is, in my humble opinion, its biggest success. The original Omni looks like it would be perfect for a night of gaming, but it can’t compare to a gigantic, all-encompassing pillow. The first thing I noticed was its thicker filling, which they tell me is a “slightly more dense polyurethane foam” compared to the squishier Gigantor. It feels more solid, like you won’t sink all the way through it during a movie or gaming marathon.

I’ve had that problem with other large beanbags. Sit on them long enough and they start to engulf you until all the good stuff that was keeping your bum happy has retreated to the places where you aren’t. Being of the thicker persuasion, the Omni Plus doesn’t have that issue. It keeps its form remarkably well.

I was sent a charcoal grey beanbag for this review, because I figured it’d go with the bizarre way I’ve decorated my apartment. If you’re worried about matching it to the subtle hues of your own living space, Sumo Lounge is offering this beautiful thing in 11 different colors. Should you decide the color you chose ruins the spirit current of your feng shui, just replace the cover.

The thing I really enjoyed about the Omni Plus is its shape. It’s a 6×5 ft pillow, and that gives it more ways to be used. It can be folded, laid on its side, etc. You can even lean it up against a wall, transforming it instantly into a super comfortable chair.

If you’re interested in grabbing one of these for yourself, you can purchase it from the Sumo Lounge store for $199. They have an impressive array of beanbags to choose from, and while I can’t speak for all of them, here are my reviews of some of their other products:

Also, so you know all the truths, Sumo Lounge did send me an Omni Plus for this review.

The post Sumo Omni Plus Review: King Pillow appeared first on Bloody Disgusting!.

I’ve spent a substantial portion of my life engulfed in the foamy goodness that is Sumo’s line of products. I still have my Sumo Titan, which currently resides in my living room, and my love for it hasn’t diminished. It’s still ridiculously comfortable and it’s managed the incredible feat of retaining its original shape. It’s had some butts on it over the last year that would’ve ruined most beanbag chairs, but the Titan always manages to bounce back.

The Omni Reloaded is nothing like the Titan or Emperor. Like the Omni beanbag, which this product seems to have been inspired by, it’s meant for one person. It’s also portable, though I’d use that term loosely.

Even though it’s significantly smaller than their beanbags, this chair isn’t as easy to move around as I would’ve thought it would be. If you’re looking for something you can bring to the beach or to a friend’s place for a movie night, that’s when you’ll use this. It folds up, somewhat awkwardly, so it can fit inside the bag it comes bundled with. Unfolding it is easy, and sitting on it is even easier.

While the Omni Reloaded is way more comfortable than any other fold-up chair I’ve ever used — and I’ve lived on the coast most of my life, so bringing chairs to the beach is something I did often growing up — its debut is in need of some fine-tuning before I’d say it’s definitely worthy of a purchase. For a chair with a $199 price tag, I expect a little more than its current iteration offers.

Even still, it’s a good product and one I plan on using every time I need additional seating. Because it’s a Sumo chair, it’s high quality stuff, so it should last awhile. It also comes in a variety of colors, from a subtle tan color to neon orange, if you’re feeling brave.

I think the issue that’s keeping me from being as excited about this product as I’ve been with the rest is, while I enjoyed the Omni Reloaded and the impressive level of comfort it offers for what’s essentially an evolution of the fold-up chair, I came into this with high expectations. It isn’t easy following up the Gigantor, Titan or Emperor with something so different.

Even still, there’s serious potential here that could eventually turn it into a real hit. But for now, it’s not a must-buy, at least not yet.

As soon as Sumo Lounge shaves a little off that price tag and makes some tweaks to its portability, I’ll be the first to give it two massive thumbs up. Until then, I’d only recommend it if you often find yourself in situations extra seating is important. It’s also worth considering for those of you who make lots of trips to the beach or pool. Otherwise, wait for the sequel.

If you’d like to check it out, you can find the Sumo Omni Reloaded on the Sumo Lounge website.

For more of Sumo Lounge’s products, check out their website.

Disclaimer: Sumo Lounge sent me an Omni Reloaded for this review.

The post Sumo Omni Reloaded Review: Sit Back, Relax appeared first on Bloody Disgusting!.

Read on for my review of the Plantronics RIG.

Aesthetically, the RIG falls under a somewhat rare category of over-the-ear headsets that I call the Sexy headsets. Sexy headsets are hard to come by, since many tend to be bulbous, bulky, and heavier than they need to be. They’re practical, sure, and the quality tends to be great, but I wouldn’t wear them in public. The RIG is sexy and practical. Its 40mm speaker drivers deliver incredible audio quality, and the textured black look paired with the orange accents looks great.

And you really can’t lose with Halloween colors, right?

The only thing that bothered me about the design — and this could totally be blamed on my the fleshy bowling ball I call a head — is it felt a little tight. I’ve swapped this out for my Astro A30s a few months ago, and in that time I’ve hosted a few late-night gaming marathons. After about 3-4 hours of wearing it almost non-stop, it starts to hurt a little bit.

If you travel a fair amount, like me, then the suite of features this headset brings with it makes it the only one you’ll ever need to take with you on the go. It’s compatible with PC and console gaming (PC/Mac, Xbox 360, PS4, PS3), and its mixer has a nifty feature that lets you instantly switch between the primary (movie, game, whatever it is you’re using it for) audio and mobile phone.

The RIG comes with two mics, an inline mic for when you’d like to take it on the go, and a boom mic for gaming or even chatting with friends on Skype. Swapping them out is crazy simple, as each mic just plugs in to the base of the headset.

This translates to two glorious things. The first is no more lost calls, missed text messages, or ignored Twitter mentions because you were too busy fragging noobs in Battlefield 4. The second is you can listen to your special murder playlist to pump you up before each match. For the multi-taskers out there, you can even have it going along with your game audio and voice chat.

The mixer has a few other features that help it rival competitors, such as my former favorite, the Astro MixAmp. It has a bevy of features to keep you busy for awhile, including the necessary option to adjust the game audio and voice chat to a perfectly tuned balance.

It also comes with three preset EQ profiles to suit whatever activity you’re looking to use the RIG for — Pure, Intensify, and Seismic — that adjust the settings with the press of a button for when you’d like to take a break from video games (ha!) to watch a movie before more gaming.

The Verdict: If all of the above hasn’t made my point clear, here it is, plain and simple. The Plantronics RIG rocks. It suits essentially every use I’ll ever need it for, and it’s one of the few that accomplishes that while looking exceedingly good at the same time. At $129.99 it isn’t cheap, but if you need a good-looking gaming headset, this is worth checking out.

Now, though I understand very little of it, I do like to include the technical stuff for those of you who actually know what it means. So with that said, here you go:

Speaker size – 40mm diameter
Speaker frequency response – 20 Hz-20kHz
Microphone frequency response – 100Hz-10kHz

If you’d like to learn more about this headset or where you can get one for yourself, head over here.

The post Plantronics RIG Gaming Headset Review: Aural Pleasure appeared first on Bloody Disgusting!.

Today, we’re taking a look at the Sumo Titan — a bean bag that lives up to its name. Read my review of this big beauty after the break.

When I say big beauty, what I really mean is something more along the lines of colossal beauty, or better yet — gargantuan beauty. What I’m trying to say is this thing is huge. It’s like a slightly smaller (specifically 70″ x 49″ x 36″), though no less intimidating younger sibling of the Gigantor, which happened to be the first Sumo bean bag I reviewed nearly four years ago.

The Titan is ideal for the bean bag enthusiast who wants something big and cozy without taking over the room it’s in. The Gigantor will take over a room. This is a wee bit more subtle.

It’s one of the newest additions to Sumo’s ever-growing line of forever squishy heaven furniture and as such, it comes with a bunch of customization options, including a handful of colors (Pitch Black, Khaki, Funky Brown and Fiery Red) as well as two possible covers, Microsuede and Corduroy. The Microsuede is a classic and probably my favorite, but Corduroy still feels great and it also looks classier, for some reason, like you could get away with smoking a pipe on it. Whichever cover you use, both can be washed after you realize you’ve essentially been living on it.

For something this size, it’s remarkably easy to get the cover on and off, all you have to do is unzip it and slip it off, then shove it back in after the Cheetos dust and sticky patches of spilled soda have been cleansed from its exterior.

I have to tell you that when Sumo says their bean bags never go flat, they mean it. As someone who’s owned two (the Gigantor and Sway) for a few years now, I can happily confirm it. I’m not sure how they accomplished such a thing — when asked if black magic played a part, they declined to comment — but my Gigantor is only a little bit lumpy after years of (ab)use. Other than that, it’s managed to retain its original shape and is just about as comfortable as the day I got it.

I suppose it goes without saying that there’s a plethora of uses you can get out of these bean bags. They’re fantastic for cuddling, video game or movie marathons or reading books, assuming you still do that. On an unrelated note, why don’t people read books anymore? Come on, books are amazing. If you do decide to get a Titan — it’s $399 here, or $419 for Corduroy — I recommend you get a book to go along with it. Might I suggest Doctor Sleep?

If the Titan isn’t exactly what you’re looking for, I’d also suggest taking a look at the Emperor and Gigantor. I hear they’re pretty great, too.

BIG thanks to the fine folks at Sumo Lounge for providing me with a Titan. I will love and cherish it forever, or at least until I die and am found a week later lying on it with a controller in one hand and a mostly empty Monster energy drink in the other.

The above picture is of our new family dog, Vinny, who immediately fell paw over paw in love with the Titan as soon as it arrived. Unlike Samson, Vinny’s new to the world of puppy modeling. I’ve told him not to be too self conscious about his body, but he just can’t seem to get over his ears, which he wishes were bigger.

The post [Ultimate Gamer Lounge] A Review Of The Sumo Titan appeared first on Bloody Disgusting!.

In July of last year, Spring — who I’ve just realized I forgot to mention has the best name ever — decided to take her dream of elevating the marshmallow to the Internet, and specifically, the crowd-funding site, Kickstarter.

She asked for $2,023, and after thirty days her campaign had raised $104,667. Apparently, people were on board.

As a marshmallow connoisseur myself — okay, not really, I just really enjoy sweets — I was giddy when Spring responded to my request to send over some samples so I could write about them. I’m sure it was a little strange getting a request like that for a feature on a horror site like Bloody Disgusting, but us horror fans enjoy our sweets too, and marshmallows pair fantastically well with horror movies, games, books, ghost stories, etc.

It didn’t take long for a box filled with bags of squishy goodies to arrive on my doorstep. In it was five bags and two adorable key chains. Three large bags held a couple dozen Kerfluffles in chocolate chip cookie dough, orange dreamsicle and mocha chip flavors. Nestled alongside those were two smaller bags filled with Triple Berry Chip and Cookies ‘n’ Cream.

I was like a kid on Christmas. A kid with a hunger in his eyes and a box filled with delicious homemade treats.

Before my stomach could take over, professionalism took its place. Instead of embracing my instincts, which were shouting at me to forget the review and just gorge myself on these tasty treats, I decided I would take one from each bag to sample the flavors, texture, mouthfeel.

That’s right, I said mouthfeel. In the mouthfeel department, I’d rate Kerfluffles somewhere between amazing and unforgettable. They’re soft and chewy, cut into bite-sized cubes that are perfectly sized for a single, glorious bite.

My favorite was difficult to pinpoint, but I think it ended up being the orange dreamsicle. They’re so refreshing, like taking a bite out of spring. Not Spring, that’d be mean — and rude, especially after she sent me treats.

The vanilla bean and the citrus flavor from the oranges — there are even little bits of orange zest sprinkled about for added texture — work brilliantly together. I immediately fell in love with them.

The orange dreamsicle ones were fantastic, but the flavor that came in at a close second was easily chocolate chip cookie dough.

They’re sweet and chewy, like the others, but each bite also brings with it a strong probability of getting a chunk of chocolate chip cookie dough. These babies are all completely hand-made, and this fact extends to the cookie dough, which is made from scratch before being mixed with the vanilla flavored marshmallows.

They. Are. Amazing.

The cookies ‘n’ cream ones were pretty great, too. I emptied that bag over a late-night Saints Row IV marathon and I found they made me roughly 56% more badass at the game. Individual results may vary, but they helped me kick Zinyak’s shiny pink ass. I also used a few of these in s’mores.

Yeah, I definitely recommend you do that.

Next up are the mocha chip Kerfluffles. I’m not a huge fan of espresso or dark chocolate, but that didn’t keep me from eating the entire bag of mocha chip ones by the end of the first week. They were the last to go, but only because my stomach was threatening to release its contents after I finished the first four bags.

In case you haven’t noticed, I have no willpower whatsoever.

The mocha chip Kerfluffles come with freshly brewed espresso flavoring that’s mixed with natural cocoa and tons of mini dark chocolate chips. They’re an amazing treat in the morning… or the afternoon, evening, whatever.

And finally, we have the triple berry chip. It’s no secret that berries and chocolate work wonderfully together, and that doesn’t change when we’re talking about marshmallows. These Kerfluffles were the most complex, as they married strawberries, raspberries, blackberries and mini-chocolate chips. There’s a lot going on, and unless you don’t like one or more of those ingredients, I guarantee you’ll enjoy them.

If you’d rather I shut up so you can get your own Kerfluffles, you can do so by Kerfluffle shuffling on down to the home of the Kerfluffle and placing an order. Tell them Adam sent you. It won’t do anything, but maybe Spring will hear about it and send me more.

Also, if you’re worried about your health — you weirdo — these treats are all-natural and free of gluten, preservatives, dyes, and sulfites. There are some that are dairy-free and they even have vegan Kerfluffles. Everyone can be happy!

In case you’re wondering why I just reviewed homemade marshmallows, feel free to take a look at other reviews I’ve done in this series. Ultimate Gamer Lounge is essentially a library of reviews of things I think are essential for the average gamer. They range from edibles, like Mountain Dew Pitch Black, to computer peripherals and even massive beanbag chairs.

This series covers a little of everything, but if I’m reviewing it here, you can be sure it’s something you should be interested in.

They will ruin marshmallows, or make them better, depending on how you look at it.
Chocolate chip cookie dough has bits of dough lining wall of package
Kerfluffle shuffle

Have a question? Feel free to ever-so-gently toss Adam an email, or follow him on Twitter and Bloody Disgusting.

The post Kerfluffles Review: The Marshmallow Has Evolved appeared first on Bloody Disgusting!.

Read on for my reviews of the only mouse and keyboard you’ll ever need.

First up, the Roccat Kone.

My time with the Kone brought up a mildly worrying question. Is it wrong to feel sexually attracted toward a computer mouse? I still haven’t found an answer, but even still, I can’t help it. The way its ergonomic design fit my hand, I dare say better than a glove. It’s smooth, polished exterior, begging to be cupped. It’s willingness to stay with me during even the longest of gaming marathons. I don’t mean to alarm any of you, but I think I’m in love.

I’ve reviewed some excellent mice before, but this one really stuck with me. It’s weighty without being too heavy, so you feel like you have something substantial in your hands without it ever over taxing your (read: my) dainty wrist.

Also, and I know this is silly, my favorite thing about it are the dual strips of LED lights that slowly blink between different colors. Purple, pink, red, orange, yellow, green, blue, then back to purple. It’s like those rainbow light show screen savers that you can’t help but stare at for longer than a normal person probably would. It’s oddly hypnotizing. It also makes for a fantastic distraction, just watch as your enemies find their eyes lured away from their monitors to your sexy mouse, giving you ample time to squash them with a Zerg rush. That’s what they get for building a support base before they get their Zealots up. Dummies.

Like any hardcore mouse — and believe me, this mouse is hardcore — the Kone XTD is stupid customizeable. It comes with eight fully programmable buttons and a 4D mouse wheel (I’m still not sure if that means it breaks the fourth dimension) and enough on-board memory to store every one of your macros and profiles.

Me? I have a single macro assigned to one profile, and that’s fucking victory.

If that doesn’t satiate your appetite for customization, this baby comes with a set of four 5-gram weights so you can choose how heavy you want it to feel. I prefer all four weights, because I like to get a workout in while I game.

If you’re a fan of technical specs, here’s what this fine piece of technology brings to the table, er, desk:

The Kone XTD comes loaded with an 8200 DPI Pro Aim R3 laser sensor — this definitely sounds like something Dr. Evil would aim at the polar ice caps as he holds the Earth ransom for one billion dollars — a 32-bit Turbo Core V2 72MHz ARM MCU processor, and the most advanced Tracking & Distance Control Unit available. Basically, it’s Skynet, packaged in a goddamn mouse.

If you like what you see, you can get it here.

Thought we were done? We’re only halfway there, and I may or may not have saved the best for last.

Next up, we have the Roccat Ryos MK Glow. It’s like the irradiated sibling to the Ryos MK, because this baby is illuminated.

Ever since I started saving my shameful gaming marathons — sponsored by Cheetos and Mountain Dew — I became a big fan of keyboards with LED lights under the keys. I don’t like gaming with the lights on, even if that means I’ll be blind when I’m 30. I guess that’s a risk I’ll just have to take.

This guy has an LED light under each key, no matter how unimportant it may be. Even F6 has a light under it, and I don’t think anyone’s pressed that key since 1996.

With their patented (I’m not sure if it’s patented) Easy-Shift technology you can completely remap every key on the fly. This lets you assign a new function to nearly every key so you can adapt it to each game. On top of this, you can store over 500 macros in the Ryos’ flash memory. That’s at least 499 more macros than I know what to do with.

Still not satisfied? Did you know the Ryos features ultra-advanced anti-ghosting with n-key rollover? It’s technology that’s so advanced, I have no idea what I just typed. Seriously. I’d need one of those Apple geeks to explain it, I just copied and pasted that line because it had ‘ghosting’ in it. My best guess is the anti-ghosting technology means you’ll never have to worry about a haunted keyboard. Roccat has you covered.

Speaking of neat tech, one of the coolest things about this keyboard is how difficult it is to get fingerprints on it. You would think a shiny piece of plastic would be a magnet for all sorts of hand grime, but not the Ryos. It repels those as well as it does ghosts.

If you like numbers, there’s a solid chance you’re going to lose your mind over the Ryos’ 32-bit ARM Cortex processor and 2MG of flash memory.

There are even achievements, because Microsoft decided to ruin gaming and now everything game-related needs to reward the player with achievements. Oh, you just spent twelve hours clearing Azeroth of Orcs so you could power level your Paladin? HERE’S AN ACHIEVEMENT.

Overall, I really enjoyed the Ryos. It’s a solid, hugely customizeable keyboard that looks great and won’t break the bank.

In the market for a new keyboard? Get the Ryos here.

HUGE thanks to the fine folks at Roccat for providing me with some of their amazing products. You can learn more about Roccat and their impressive arsenal of PC gaming peripherals here.

Have a question? Feel free to ever-so-gently toss Adam an email, or follow him on Twitter and Bloody Disgusting.

The post [Ultimate Gamer Lounge] The Only Mouse And Keyboard You’ll Ever Need appeared first on Bloody Disgusting!.

I haven’t been able to figure out what it’s made of, though I’m pretty sure its ingredients include ground up unicorns and the happiness of young children. Read on for my review of the newest addition to the Sumo line-up — the Sumo Emperor.

I’d like to get two things out of the way before we get this review rolling. The first is when my bean bag arrived, my friend mistook the Emperor for packing material and decided to ventilate the bean bag with a kitchen knife. Thanks for that.

Secondly, the plus-sized pug you see in these pictures is Samson. I’d like to get his modeling career going, so I figured this review would provide a fantastic kick-start to his career in the dog-eat-dog world of puppy modeling. You can email all your fan letters here.

Obviously, I tested the bean bag — rigorously and often, I might add — but I also had some other people try it out, too. My parents enjoyed it, even if they couldn’t quite grasp the idea of why someone would choose a bean bag over a chair. Blasphemous old fogies. My brother had kinder things to say when he tried it out, like Oooohhh yeeeessss, and Mmmmmmm. A man of few words. The one who enjoyed it the most is Samson, who always fell asleep thirty seconds after his paws touched the bag.

I’ve had the Sumo Emperor for a couple months now and like their other bean bags, the thing hasn’t lost any of its fluff. Even after months of stress tests — i.e. gaming/movie marathons and my occasional jumping up and down on it like a over-caffeinated child — the Emperor looks exactly as it did when it first arrived, stab wound included. The same went for the Gigantor and Sway, both of which retained their shape even after a year of enduring me as an owner.

Of the Sumo bean bags I’ve reviewed, the Emperor is bigger than the Sway, but smaller than the Gigantor. So if you’d like a big, cozy bean bag that can fit two people without having to sacrifice half your living room to accommodate it, the Emperor may be the perfect fit for you. It measures 55″ x 25″ of pure, heavenly comfort.

Unfortunately, because it’s a new product, you can only get the Emperor in Fiery Red — at least for now. This of course limits where you can put it, unless your home has a race car red theme to it. The other bean bags have multiple options to choose from, so I hope they’ll introduce a few more colors soon. I love red and all, but a gargantuan red bean bag is a difficult thing to bring into any household, unless it’s like my place, which I’ve given a roller coasters and deep sea diving theme, so as to guarantee that everything fits in there.

Size is always an issue when you’re talking about a giant, cushiony bag you use as furniture. If you’re thinking about purchasing one of these big beauties, you’ve probably already decided that it’s size isn’t big deal. What about the comfort?

I won’t bury the lead: the Sumo Emperor is an intensely comfortable bean bag. Even more so than the Sway — it’s more of a giant bean bag chair — and right in line with the Gigantor, which is a bulbous mass of a bean bag that grabs hold of your ass and refuses to let go. I only had one issue with it, and it’s a small one.

The way the Emperor is designed gives it a little bum-shaped crater in the center that’s surrounded by walls of hold-me-and-don’t-ever-let-me-go goodness. If it’s just you, then this makes the bag more comfortable. However, it also makes it more difficult to remove yourself from. I’ve already discovered there’s no elegant way to get off of a bean bag — it’s all grunts, sweating and a serious reliance on upper body strength — but it’s worth mentioning.

This divot also makes bringing two people onto it a little more difficult. You can’t lay on the walls and awkwardly stare at the center as you wait to see who’s going to plunge into it first, and unless you don’t mind getting real friendly with the person you’re sharing the Emperor with, the shape of it is going to send both of you toward the center.

The Emperor also makes for a fantastic trap. It’s a great tool for getting close to someone you’re fond of, because all you need to do is use its cozy disguise to lure in your prey with the promise of hours of comfort. Then, when the two of you are on it and its clever design sends both of you hurtling towards each other, they’ll realize they can’t escape because it’s a bean bag and those things are so goddamned hard to get off of.

You’re welcome.

The Final Word: Drop $249 and get one. Your butt will thank you.

Disclaimer: A Sumo Emperor bean bag was provided by Sumo for this review.

Have a question? Feel free to ever-so-gently toss Adam an email, or follow him on Twitter and Bloody Disgusting.

The post [Ultimate Gamer Lounge] A Review Of The Sumo Emperor appeared first on Bloody Disgusting!.

Do you consider yourself to be a tough individual? Rough around the edges, as they say? Do you find the current selection of small and colorful earbuds and headphones to be lacking in the manly department? If you answered yes to any of those questions then I have a pair for you. If cutesy, colorful earbuds aren’t your thing, maybe it’s time for you to shove some bullets in your ears.

UPDATE: The contest is now closed, thanks for participating! Now, I’m the type of person who sees something shiny in a store and I immediately need it. That’s why I stay clear of Apple stores, because literally everything is shiny there, even the Geniuses. Earphones shaped like bullets falls into the category of things I’d very much like to have five of, and while I tend to hate myself after most of my impulse buys, these actually sound as great as they look.

For starters, they’re crafted from aircraft grade aluminum, and the rubber cable has been reinforced with Kevlar. In other words, if you ever find yourself in the middle of a zombie apocalypse, these are the earphones you need to be sporting, because they’re almost definitely going to last longer than you.

Obviously, the most important thing about a pair of earphones is how they sound, and thanks to some things I’m sure no one but the most dedicated of audiophiles will understand, these earphones really pack a punch.

I have a pretty eclectic taste in music, so I was able to hear the way many different flavors of music sound as they’re being fired into my ears. Everything sounds clear, much like you’d expect a pair of higher end earphones to sound. The best part of all this is the noise-isolating earbuds mean you can enjoy your music without the hassle of hearing other people’s annoying voices. The only downside to this for me was using the earphones for hands-free calling. It’s a nifty feature, but it was difficult getting used to hearing my voice while I talked on the phone.

I really put these guys to the test, bringing them with me on my jogs, to work, on the bus, and even on a plane. After all that I learned a few things. First off, these earphones stay remarkably comfortable, even after they’ve been stuck in your ear for 4-5 hours. They’re also snug enough to really stay in there, even if you’re moving around a lot. They also do a pretty decent job of cancelling out surrounding noise, so if you spend a good amount of time on public transportation, at airports, etc., this will definitely come in handy.

You might be saying aloud to your computer, Why Adam, how will I know if these splendid earphones are compatible with my current selection of music players? to which I’ll reply, Dear reader, why are you talking to your computer? I was able to use these for my computers (Mac and PC), and iPhone, and according to the Billets website they’re compatible with the “industry-leading smartphones, MP3 players, laptops, and tablets.” So more than likely, these earphones will work with whatever it is you need them for.

Overall, I love these things. Like, if I could and people wouldn’t think it was strange, I would totally take them out for a nice dinner and a night on the town. I wouldn’t even care if they put out, because I love them that much. If you’re in the market for a sleek and sexy pair of earphones that are stylish and sound great, these won’t disappoint.

For the hardcore audio enthusiasts, here’s a full list of specs:
Anodized machined drivers
9mm neodymium drivers
Noise isolating SiliconeHollowPoints
MUNITIO’s BassEnhancingChamber
Kevlar reinforced cable with cloth cover
24K gold plated 3.5mm plug

This particular pair of earphones brings with it a Battle Gray finish, two earhooks, 6 sets of earbuds (3 in clear/black, and 3 in smokey/red, in 3 different sizes), and an in-line mic for hands-free calling, and finally, a two-year limited warranty. They retail for $69.99 USD.

If you’d like to win a pair of these stylish earphones, what I need you to do is comment on this review telling me where you plan on using them, if you won a pair. On a plane? Bus? Car? Walking? Sexing? Reading? Showering? I’d like to know.

Full disclosure: A pair of Billets 9mm earphones were made available to me for the purposes of this review.

Get an extra dose of Adam on Twitter.

The post The Ultimate Gamer Lounge: Billets 9mm Earphones Review + A Giveaway appeared first on Bloody Disgusting!.

I fall into the latter category, and I have pictures of a younger me with felt tip penises and Hitler mustaches marked on my sleeping face to prove it. Before I discovered the Epinephrine-like powers of Amp and Monster, I relied solely on a single drink to keep me alert over late night playthroughs of Resident Evil 4 and Halo 2.

This beverage was Mountain Dew. But this article isn’t just telling you to stock your fridge with Dews, instead we’re going to take a long hard look at my all-time favorite soda ever. Nay, that doesn’t fully cover it: this isn’t just a tasty beverage, it’s quite possibly the most delicious thing I’ve ever put in my mouth. And it’s a pleasure you can’t easily find.

There have been a plethora of Mountain Dew flavors that have come and gone, some you might recognize, others you might not. There are mainstays like Code Red, a cherry fan’s wet dream, and the orange injected Livewire, that always makes me think for summer. Then there are the rarer Dews, like the Taco Bell exclusive Baja Blast and the various Game Fuel flavors that promoted Halo 3 and World of Warcraft.

And finally, there’s the darker Dew. The Dew with an attitude and a moral ambiguity that’s terrifying right up until you take a sip. After that, there’s no turning back. You don’t share a sidewalk with this Dew, no, you cross the street so you don’t have to endure its steely-eyed glare. This Dew is Mountain Dew Pitch Black.

Originally launched way back in 2004, before any of us had traversed the empty, broken halls of Rapture, or the bloodied corridors of the USG Ishimura, we were introduced to something far more terrifying than a Big Daddy. Pitch Black was an homage to my favorite holiday, Halloween, and though my first affair with the drink was brief, it was oh so memorable.

Pitch Black’s brief stint on store shelves was like having a quick fling with the person of your dreams, only to have them suddenly disappear. It was heartbreaking.

Then, just as you’re starting to get over them they return, and there y’re amazing than you remember (if you’re confused, this would be Pitch Black II, the sour “sequel” that released the following year). You have a few more months with them, just enough time to fall back in love, before they leave again, never to be heard from again.

Well, not for six years at least. Over the years the memories of your time with them have faded but never completely dissolved. You remember the good times, because you’ve since tried to forget about their leaving so suddenly and the weeks that followed where you spent most of your time balled up on the floor of your dark room sobbing violently, wondering if they’ll ever return. Then you see it, on Facebook no less, that they’re coming back. Again, it’s for a limited time, but you can’t be angry because at least they’re coming back, right?

Alright, brace yourself, because I’m dropping an analogy.

Back in January I was notified by a friend who helped me during those dark times after Pitch Black first left me that it was finally coming back. Usually, I would ignore such a comment, dismissing it as improbable, but this same person had helped me when I needed them the most. They were there for me when I was suffering from the shakes, sweats, and incoherent mumbling that are the common signs of Pitch Black withdrawal. It didn’t take long to confirm the soda was indeed being brought back thanks to Mountain Dew’s “Back by Popular DEWmand” campaign.

What a genius idea. Bring your community together, a group that’s more vocal than say, Charmin Ultra’s community (thought a clean bum is very important kids), and have them vote on discontinued flavors so the top picks can be brought back for a limited run. Whoever thought of that will forever be one of my many heroes, right up there with Isaac Clarke and that one guy who said “Hey guys, maybe we should just let Duke Nukem die?” Sadly, no one listened to him, but at least someone paid close attention to the other guy’s idea.

Once the dust had settled, there were three winners: Pitch Black, Supernova, and Typhoon.

Sadly, I haven’t had the opportunity to try the other two flavors (I blame it on my inability to find anything but the permanent Dew flavors near me), but Supernova is supposed to be a fusion of strawberry and melon (yum), and Typhoon is all about the strawberry and the pineapple. But this isn’t about that strawberry infused duo — this is about Mountain Dew Pitch Black.

For the uninitiated, I’ll explain Pitch Black as I would if I were writing its Baby Factor in a game review. Essentially, it’s what would happen if Mountain Dew got together with grape soda and a little bit of sweet, Halloween love, for a steamy night of soda on soda action.

I’m going to lean in a little closer so it’s easier for me to coo this softly in your ear: it’s Mountain Dew, with some Black Grape, and a little bit of Halloween thrown in. I’ll give you a minute to wipe yourself off.

Now, if you look at the label, it says it’s been infused with Black Grape. What is this Black Grape, because I’d very much like to plant some Black Grape seeds in my yard so I can grow these tasty motherfuckers all year long. I’ve always been a fan of grape soda, so the lovechild of Mountain Dew and one of my favorite soda flavors was bound to be a hit with me. The fact that it was a limited edition, Halloween branded anything pretty much sealed the deal right away.

So that, as they say, is that. I could talk about how strange it felt to be drinking what I still consider to be a Halloween drink in the midst of summer but I won’t because it came back. Now that it’s gone and I’m beginning to feel the all too familiar shakes and sweats returning, I can only hope that it will return again. Not many people can say they got to have the love of their life long after they thought they were dead. But now, thanks to DEWmocracy, the thing this country of ours was built on, I can say that I did.

And to Pitch Black: if you’re reading this, come home. Daddy wants his purple baby back.

I’d also like to thank Mountain Dew for hearing my pleas and sending me a couple bottles of Pitch Black, which I quickly emptied and placed atop my mantle like the stuffed head of an animal I just conquered.

The post Mountain Dew Pitch Black is Purple Liquid Sex appeared first on Bloody Disgusting!.

Few of us are lucky enough to have such a place set aside just waiting to keep us comfy while we explore City 17, Raccoon City, Rapture, or a certain foggy resort for hours on end. That’s what this series is all about because every week or two we’ll take a look at some of the best gear and furniture ideal for gamers. And what better way to start off such a series than with one of the best inventions since, well, the gaming console: the beanbag chair.

I’ve long been a fan of the beanbag chair. It’s alluring bulbous shape, the sound it makes as it conforms to your bum, the way even the most talented Interior Designer doesn’t have the skill to match this loud, comfy mass with other furniture in even a slightly appealing way. I’ve owned a handful of beanbag chairs in my time, most of which were in my possession when I was too young to fully realize their potential as a small animal cannon, but never have I owned anything as large or welcoming as the Sumo Gigantor.

Now I’m old, or older, and even if I had owned a thousand beanbag chairs before this nothing could’ve prepared me for the hulking monolith of beany comfort that is the Gigantor. This thing isn’t a piece of furniture, it’s a way of life, and it’s the first thing you see when you enter my apartment, mainly because everything else is hidden in its rather substantial shadow.

So you can more fully realize the size and beauty that is the Gigantor, it’s six feet wide and stands close to four feet tall. It’s easily my newest favorite thing in my room (sorry Sony Bravia, you’re no longer the Hot Stuff) and I dare say it has an aura of intimidation about it, like the room it occupies is no longer yours and you’re now the furniture and the Gigantor your master.

If you’ve ever owned a beanbag chair you already know the basics; they tend to be comfy, mound-ish, and they make a satisfying soft crunching sound when you place your weary bum upon them. This alone might sell the idea of a beanbag chair to most, but wait, it gets better. You can customize it with four different micro suede covers that come off easily for washing, they’re essentially waterproof, as everything I’ve accidentally tossed upon it has harmlessly slid right off, and they’re guaranteed to never go flat.

In past experience with such furnishings, they usually go flat or transform into odd, butt-shaped forms after time. The Gigantor, being above such cruelty, shrugs off any indentations left by behind abuse in a half hour, tops. Then it sits there, daring you to sit upon it again so it can swallow you up and not let go until you find the strength, or will, to escape its cozy clutches.

If you’re lucky enough to have a room dedicated to entertainment (or for the luckier amongst us, a Game Room, err, Lounge) the Gigantor is one of the comfiest things you can stuff in such a room. Its customization arsenal is limited to four options but that should be enough to match it to your room’s décor. It can fit multiple people, assuming you know each other well enough to snuggle within close proximity of one another. Or if you’re like me there’s more than enough space for a single individual to sprawl out and make bean angels for hours on end. Hell, it could even double as a bed, and believe me; mine managed this feat on more than one occasion.

The only issue, assuming you haven’t gathered this already, is just how colossal the Gigantor is. Once it’s in a room it owns the room. But that’s not necessarily a bad thing, it’s just an incredibly noticeable one. Mine replaced my ailing futon to become my new throne, ideal for gaming/movie-watching/[CENSORED]. If you’re looking for something that places comfort above all else, or if you’re simply looking for a way to force your date/significant other to get real close, the Gigantor might be the perfect addition to your home. Just make sure you have room.

The Sumo Gigantor beanbag is a product of the fine people at Sumo Lounge, and it retails for $399 USD, but how can you put a price on comfort? If you’re looking for something a little less room-engulfing there are a plethora of other Sumo bean bag chairs available at the Sumo Lounge website.

The post The Ultimate Gamer Lounge: Meet the Sumo Gigantor appeared first on Bloody Disgusting!.