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[BD Caption Contest] Last Week’s Winners Announced, Two New Prizes This Week!

We have our winners from last week’s contest!

First PrizeThe Divide on Blu-ray. I Spit On Your Grave (1978) on Blu-ray. The Walking Dead Season 1 on DVD. The Winner is bunny boiler with “That is Mahogany!

Second PrizeThe Divide on Blu-ray. I Spit On Your Grave (1978) on Blu-ray. The Winner is tdmm69 with “I am not Chelsea-f*cking-Handler!

Third PrizeThe Divide on Blu-ray. The Winner is chadstephen2005 with “This is Spartaaaaaaa!!!!” Winners, please DM me your US mailing address for the prizes. The rest of you, The Divide is released Tuesday 4/17 on Blu/DVD. On to this week’s contest.


1. We pick a still from a movie. It’s included after the jump. You head to the comments section and submit your best one-liners, zingers, pathos riddled couplets etc…

2. You can enter as many times as you like and submit as many captions as you want, but each caption must be in a separate comment. Otherwise it will be too hard to tell where one caption ends and the other begins. Your entries can be posted anytime during the first five days after the still is announced (you don’t want to submit your winning zinger after we’ve picked the winner). Also any racist, sexist, homophobic or generally hateful jokes will be disqualified. You don’t have to be insanely PC – just use your best judgement.

3. We pick the winner and announce them and their winning caption when the next photo in the contest is posted. We will address you by your BD Infected name. You can then DM me your address and I will send you your prize in a timely manner (i.e. you should have it in about a week). You must be a US resident to receive your prize!

First PrizeThe Walking Dead Season 1 on DVD, Corman’s World on Blu-ray and Apollo 18 on Blu-ray.

Second PrizeApollo 18 on Blu-ray and Camel Spiders on Blu-ray.

Head inside for this week’s picture!



  • Slacker2387

    Doctor-“Are you sure this is the look you want? I think the public will be more receptive with a little less teeth and a little more sparkle”

    • But, Grandmother, What big teeth you have! The better to eat you with!

  • redeyedjedi410

    See kids, this is what watching too much TV can do to you

  • A-Devils-Reject

    Sacha Baron Cohen before he was famous.

  • Looks like the meds have finally kicked in…

  • DeadGirlsDontSayNo

    Where are you going with my bedpan!?

  • Forever alone.

  • “The doctor says it may be Jaundice”

  • horror_geek1331

    “Whaddya mean ‘smile’? I AM smiling.”

  • hellogarrett

    ‘Go to med school’ they said…’It would be fun’ they said…

  • “is there something is my teeth?”


  • Watch Twilight they said. It will be fun they said…

  • What a man really looks like when he has an orgasm.

  • RammsteinForever

    “The doctor said I need more sparkles in order to appeal to people these days.”

  • horror_geek1331

    “Don’t touch me there. I don’t like it when people touch me there.”

  • ExecuteOrder66

    The vampire picture. The new replacement of the classic “duck face” pictures on facebook profiles.

  • “I’m 5 foot 9 inches. I like long walks on bodies. I like to play games…. I mean play with brains. People say I’m to die for. My perfect date would be the usual— Dinner at McMeaties and a movie about the Human Apocalypse.”

  • Sparkle?! I haven’t sparkled for over a thousand years you @#!hole!!

  • “This is what happens when you do Dr. Pepper Commercials.”


    Talk about beer goggles!

  • “I don’t want a cookie!”

  • No baby, I’m not mad. Why don’t you just go to sleep…

  • Well we have examined the bite on your neck and I have some good news and some bad news. The good news is you’re going to live, the bad news is you’re going to be on a permanent liquid diet.

  • BUB237

    What the hell do you mean,I’ve got 3 weeks to live!!!!!!!

  • “Why, yes, the doctor did say it was just allergies! I have allergies, and by allergies, I mean I’m a f*cking vampire!”

  • see I told you us Brits don’t all have bad teeth.

  • ExecuteOrder66

    ♫ Die…Die…Die….
    ….I can’t♫

  • “Wow I just had the craziest dream. It was about the human apocalypse.”

  • RammsteinForever

    “Oh, no, this is just how I look on Mondays.”

  • “Vampire? No!!!! I just got my new Billy Bob teeth in!”

  • RammsteinForever

    “They told me I need to work on my smile.”

  • el terror


  • thefrozenburrito

    “You know what’s the best thing to do?”

    “talking to your dead victims in the theatre”

  • “I just LOVE candy-stripers….for breakfast.”

  • melissags

    Would you say my teeth are off-white? Taupe? Café au lait? Ecru? Seriously, be brutally honest with me.

  • Doctor I told you I didn’t want that suppository.

  • dmills

    “I knew getting these veneers would be a good idea”

  • Orestes

    There’s bacon?!?!

  • purplek

    “So you’re who’s taking my daughter to prom? Oh, thank God haha I thought she was a lesbian.”

  • redeyedjedi410

    “Good news jack, we got ya more morphine!!”

  • SimplyCiara

    “You see these? Play that stupid Twilight movie one more time, and I will chew you to shreds with ’em.”

  • onegodofpsp

    “Thank you OBAMACARE!!”

  • MAC2000

    31 years later, Dr. Pepper still denies any malpractice.

  • alimoney


  • chone

    Have you seen my sister, Regan? She was last seen spitting pea soup at a priest or something.

  • inthemouthofmadness2012

    Oxycotton Posterboy

  • Ozzfreak

    you have bacon?? I LOVE BACON!!

  • Jon Weaver

    Say “Twilight” again. Say “Twilight” again. I dare you. I double-dare you, motherfucker. Say “Twilight” one more goddamn time.

  • Jadedangel

    Wakey, Wakey, brains and bacon!

  • HorrorFan__180

    “The Doctors say its probably just the flu, but they want to keep me under 24 hour observation just to be sure.”

  • aerokorngal

    I am vampire. I am invincible. I am stir crazy!

  • aerokorngal

    Careful folks, if you don’t watch out your face will stay this way!

  • aerokorngal

    For dinner? Pus spread on a slice of bread. ‘Cause that’s what you eat when you are dead.

  • Michael

    Ridiculously Photogenic Guy

  • Ronster

    Hey baby, glad to see you. Let me show you how a REAL vampire does it! …come a little closer and satisfy my meat tooth! You’ll be glad you came!

  • katakhom

    At that age it would only look too weird to have braces.


  • jonathan562

    say cheesee!

  • jonathan562


  • jonathan562

    I’m the new Robert Pattinson

  • jonathan562

    I’m hot right?

  • jonathan562

    team Rob!

  • jonathan562


  • After he dropped out of the election, the real rick santorum surfaced.

  • RedDead83

    Proactive Solution: Clear skin…and the sudden urge to eat people.

  • “HEY! Next time, warn me BEFORE you begin the prostate exam!”

  • R. Flagg

    Morphine is fucking AWESOME!!!

  • Raze55

    Who would you screw for a klondike bar?!?!

  • R. Flagg

    Warning!!! Use of this product may cause:

    1.Pale, pasty skin.
    2.Jaundiced eyes.
    3.Mouth rot.
    4.Demonic possession.
    5.The sudden urge to feast on the the souls of unbaptized babies.

    If you experience any of these side effects please seek medical help from a doctor or soul cleansing from an exorcist immediately.

  • Whatsamovie

    I’m gunna smash that f*cking alarm clock!!!!!!

  • Screamin-Larry

    “Oh yeah…you’re dutch oven was just hilarious. Get the fuck out of my room!”

    • Screamin-Larry

      your….not you’re. damn….

  • R. Flagg

    The hospital cafeteria has tapioca pudding? YES, YES, YES!!!


    Say Brains and Cheeeeeessseeeee!!

  • Raze55

    Joan Rivers plastic surgeon is terrible.

  • R. Flagg

    Pazuzu was very happy when he found out that Zelda Rubinstein had finally died.

  • ControlledChaos

    I’m so full of shit, you can see it in my eyes

  • zaglewiz

    This is my shit eating grin.

  • Manuel Jimenez

    Toothpaste? Sunglasses? I’ve never heard of such things. Please, tell me more.

  • Dark-one

    Go ahead…Call me a vampire one more time i dare you

  • alienxphile

    Give it to me straight doctor . . . how bad is it?

  • alienxphile

    I have how long!? Well, at least I had my orange juice.

  • alienxphile

    In my professional opinion I recommend plastic surgery.

  • alienxphile

    After some much needed plastic surgery, Khloe finally became the prettiest Kardashian.

  • “Where the Fuck is my Bella? Damn, Edward!”

  • nicole gunter

    I swear …….I know I look like her but I am not the father of the little girl in the movie Exorcist……

  • R. Flagg

    Why so happy? I just found out the new blonde candy stripper is giving me my sponge bath.

  • alienxphile

    What do you mean you can’t find a heartbeat!?

  • alienxphile

    Doc, I have been with A LOT of women and A LOT of men and I think it is time to get an AIDS test. Ya know . . . just to be safe.

  • Please do not disturb John. He already is!

  • cwill2251

    I just came…

  • Klepto4

    Twilight – The PreSparkly Years

  • Shoulda’ had V8

  • KreturOfTheWheel

    And I jizzed in my pants!

  • tim sanford

    Hospital food will be the death of me.

  • KreturOfTheWheel

    Andy Samberg: Vampire Hunter

  • K31SH1

    You too can look as terrifying in Halloween with these ACME fake teeth.

    Fine print: Prolonged use causes Hepatitis C

  • bumperbob

    What do you mean, you don’t drink Dr. Pepper!

  • skullz3181

    Those sheep s@!& on my pack!


    No. Really. Do I have anything in my teeth ?

  • “4 out of 5 zombie dentists recommend Dentyne with whitening gum…for their patients that chew…BRAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAINS!”

  • zafisher94

    “i’m sexy and i know it”

  • Sooooo….a man walks into a bar with a monkey and i forgot the rest of this joke but your mom is a whore

  • rpetrulsky

    Got blood?

  • zafisher94

    “Are u talkin’ to me?”

  • zafisher94

    “I think my wisdom teeth are coming in”


    Fuck it! Ya’ll want pick me anyway.

  • chadstephen2005

    You got a pretty mouth.

  • chadstephen2005

    I’m Barbara Walters!

  • chadstephen2005

    Smile if you’re horny!

  • chadstephen2005

    I can sparkle too……

  • NRKee

    -Say Cheese!


  • chadstephen2005

    Are you ready to return to titanic?

  • redeyedjedi410

    “Hey, baby, do you believe in love at first bite?”

  • TSchiefer

    “Cuz this is THRILLA! THRILLA NIGHT! And no one’s gonna save you from the beast about to strike!”

  • john0036

    I can’t go to Taco Bell right now, Karen. I’m on an all carb diet. God, you’re so stupid!

  • Smashdevour

    Proof that whitening strips and visine don’t do a damn thing for you.

  • sharknoodles

    But, as my plastic surgeon always said: if you gotta go, go with a smile.

  • babagloom

    “Good morning Sunshine!”

  • babagloom

    “Really? It still doesn’t look like I’m smiling? How about now?”

  • sharknoodles

    I’m only laughing on the outside. My smile is just skin deep. If you could see inside I’m really crying. You might join me for a weep.

  • babagloom

    Higher angle! Higher angle! Best way to get rid of nasty eyes and gnarly fangs. Haven’t you ever seen a profile pic? Instant fix!

  • babagloom

    Funny thing is, this guy’s hands are beautiful.

  • babagloom

    I had the same reaction when my Xbox broke.

  • babagloom

    Prince Michael Jackson II (AKA Blanket) is finally unmasked.

  • Chadcollins

    “Oh no doctor, the patient is fine, he’s just in a constant state of euphoria having just seen The Cabin in the Woods.”

  • Chadcollins

    “Me? I’m not sick, I just saw The Cabin in the Woods.”

  • xXTheDaymanXx

    The kids love it when I do crazy face

  • BattleRoyale4eva

    And the winner of RuPaul’s Drag Race is…..

  • ThunderDragoon

    “Do these false teeth look fake to you?”

  • NaturalB0rnKilr

    Doctor: “Oh crap, I think we accidentally gave this patient an injection of rabies.”
    Detective: “Oh man. Now he’s really never gonna shut up about being attacked by a werewolf…”

  • Black Shadow

    – “It could be Lupus.”

  • Kimberly Lawson

    ♪ Look at my eyes… look how they pine for you, and everything they view. Yeah they were all yellow. I came along. I ate a dude or two. And ate all the bones too. My teeth stained all yellow. My skin. Oh yeah, my skin and bones, turned into something grey and dull. You know, you know I love your skull. You know I love your skull. ♪

  • *creepy pedo voice* anyone care for some candy?

  • Marla Singer

    “I’m just a wee bit jaundiced. It should clear up in a day or two. Nothing to be alarmed about!”

  • Marla Singer

    Poor George. He was never quite the same after his wife made him watch an episode of The Real Housewives of New Jersey.

  • Fetus-in-Fetu

    I am on a drug!!!! It’s called Charlie Sheen!!!!

  • BloodyANJ

    Here comes johnny

  • BloodyANJ

    Relax, it’s not bad as it sounds.

  • BloodyANJ

    I see dead people!

  • BloodyANJ

    Sometimes I sneak into your closet and watch you.

  • SickAxe

    “what do you mean I look strange?”

  • SickAxe

    “Hey, don´t look at me, I gave my best smile!”

  • SickAxe

    “I did not even Wanted to go to your´e stupid party”

  • SickAxe

    “you’re the one who wanted to take this picture, now Suffer!”

  • SickAxe

    “Hello ladies. Look at your man, now back to me, now back to your man, now back to me.
    Sadly he isn’t me. But if he had drank the same Kool-Aid he would look like me”

  • FleshLives

    Go to hell Jacob, I’m the man!

  • St.Anger

    Maybe she was born with it. Maybe it’s mabeline!

  • are you sure these meds have no side effects

  • Don-Corleone

    I’m Hell until I’ve had my morning coffee.

  • Don-Corleone

    Does this shirt bring out my eye color?

  • Don-Corleone

    Floss? Never! Why do you ask?

  • Don-Corleone

    Is this puberty?


    ”I feel pretty oh so pretty”

  • wdejackson

    “I’m guessing I’m the ‘Before Invisalign’ guy then…”

  • YES, the teeth DO come with being a Vampire! Now, let me suck your neck, BITCH!

  • TSchiefer

    “Yeeeah, well, David, we’ve taken a look at your headshot, and I really don’t think you’re Jersey Shore material, thanks for coming in though.”

  • Daddy-the-Baddy

    NO… WIRE… HANGERS…EVER!!!!!!!!

  • “Oh yeah… that’s the spot…”

  • “Lemme tell ya… when they say to talk to your Doctor before using Viagra and Vicadin at the same time, they MEAN IT!”

  • “… using the whole fist, there, Doc?”

  • “With MENTOS, fresh and full of liiiiife!”

  • “No, baby, it’s OK. It’s not contagious. Trust me.”

  • Brohowl

    I’m Ready for My Closeup, Mr. DeMille

  • MAC2000


  • MAC2000

    “If you think this is bad, you should have seen me in Paris!”

  • JimboBruno

    Rick Santorum’s reactions to primary wins became more extreme as the campaign progressed.

  • JimboBruno

    Eddie Munster used to be such a nice boy…

  • JimboBruno

    Does this shirt make my teeth look fat?

  • GoryGus

    So doc, give it to me straight, how serious is it?!

  • SSx13x90

    “You say my skin will sparkle after the operation?”

  • BornVillian

    Tired of that same old dirty feeling? Try Orbit gum for a good clean feeling, no matter what.

  • BornVillian

    Bags under my eyes? Oh no thats just the darkness consuming my soul. After all the eyes are the window to the soul.

  • BornVillian

    The face of anger after most remakes these days

  • Alex Brookshire

    This is what I get for letting Tom Savini do my plastic surgery

  • Alex Brookshire

    Hey, it could be worse. I could be one of those sparkly vampires from Twilight

  • Skull-And-Crossbones

    I don’t always drink blood but when I do….I prefer menstrual.

  • Skull-And-Crossbones

    “The dingo didn’t eat your baby. I ate your baby!!!”

  • Alex Brookshire

    This is not what I meant when I wished for something to be big and large.

  • pspowerguy2012


  • FarmerWaits

    “Dirty Mouth?….Clean it up with the new Orbit lemon-lime!”

  • Alex Brookshire

    I hate being an american werewolf in london

  • babagloom

    Male nurse leans to female nurse and slyly says: “Maybe we should call Dr. Frankenstein.”

  • FukO

    “Don’t let food hang around. Clean it up with Orbits. FABULOUS! For A Good Clean Feeling.”

  • FukO

    “Hey baby, I do oral. Wait, where are you going?”

  • RonJeremysWiener

    “Really Doc… all this just for an erection lasting more than four hours?”

  • FarmerWaits

    “Get me a chicken sandwich and some waffle fries bitch!”

  • “Can you even dye my eyes to match my crowns?”
    “Jolly good town!”

  • Codacious

    “Guys check it out! Household bleach.”

  • Evan3

    “And the WORST school picture day photo goes to….”

  • russellg79

    Here is a sneak peak at the new Republican anti-Obamacare ad campaign.

  • Don-Corleone

    ♩ ♪ “I’m makin’ it –
    I’ve got the chance, I’m takin’ it…”
    ♫ ♬

  • dondarko

    Dirty Mouth?Clean it up with Orbitz!

  • Dondarko

    I am gonna Audition for the Twilight movie…..Wait…what do you mean vampires are suposed to sparkle???????????

  • Dondarko

    Stephanie meyer I got your big wolf hangin!

  • Dondarko

    I dont always drink beer but when i do……….This is what happens.

  • kottonmouthqueen

    “What do you mean you only have green jello!”

  • kottonmouthqueen

    “Whoa doc! I thought only babies got their temperature taken that way.”

  • Am I pretty enough for you now?!

  • Ghost-Prototype

    “Nurse! If I have to watch one more episode of Khloe and Lamarrrrrr…!”

  • Tunchi-Romero

    4 out of 5 dentists prefer Crest.

  • Laugh Riot

    Man Edward!!! I told you to have Bella checked for VD!!!!

  • Laugh Riot

    You have one match on E Harmony
    Miss Abby Normal

  • Laugh Riot

    Children of the night, shut up!

  • Beezle2112

    Four out of five dentists agree that this is effed up.

  • Beezle2112

    This is some GOOOOOOOD morphine!

  • Beezle2112

    I don’t think these dentures and contacts give me the image I am really looking for. Maybe something a little less ‘blood thirsty cursed man’ and something a little more Brad Pitt would be better.

  • Manuel Jimenez

    What’s gotten into ME? Same thing that’s about to get into YOU.

  • Alex Brookshire

    Don’t worry, it’s all a dream. (reference to film)

  • The worst case of “meth mouth” I’ve ever seen!!

  • Because the duckface is SO last year!!!!

  • Because you have to get a little unconventional when you’ve already taken 97,443 headshots of yourself with your camera phone.

  • FarmerWaits

    ” Damn it Ben Stein! Where did you put my Clear Eyes?!?!?!”

  • Alex Brookshire

    Go away Jack!!!!!!!

  • Alex Brookshire

    I said no f*@king garlic!!!!!

  • Laugh Riot

    Garlic Trojan’s Not for Everyone….

  • spiralout46n2

    “Enzyte… the effective and reliable way to natural male enhancement.”

  • Laugh Riot

    For Depression Doctors like Linda Blair recommend “Reganol”. Taken right before bedtime helps treat mild to severe cases. In some instances cramps in the neck have been reported. Vomiting and discoloration of the eye had also been reported. Changes in mood may occur when first starting “Reganol”. Also vocal anomalies such as speaking in foreign languages and difference in voice pitch and tone can be possible while on “Reganol”.

  • strangedays8

    The new orderly was fired when they found out it was he who had been putting the fake monster-teeth and colored contacts on the Alzheimer patients.

  • ….and the guys in the Hangover thought waking up with a monkey and a missing tooth was bad!!!

  • EvanDickson

    Wow guys, a lot of these are great!

    The contest is now closed, winners will be announced tomorrow along with a new contest.

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