[BD Caption Contest] Opening Up A New Barrel Of Quotes!
![Wicker Man Banner 61712 [BD Caption Contest] Opening Up A New Barrel Of Quotes!](http://cdn.bloody-disgusting.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/06/Wicker_Man_Banner_61712.jpg "Wicker_Man_Banner_61712")
Wow. You guys really killed it this week. Over 300 submissions! Let’s get to 400 this week! It’s more work for me to go through but I like the enthusiasm so it’s worth it.
First Prize is our MYSTERY PRIZE (this week it consists of 2 DVDs and 1 Blu-Ray). Winner is Robertrand with “You saw ‘The Sorceror’s Apprentice’? Then I owe you $12.50.” Please DM me your US mailing address (no PO boxes).
Rules:
1. We pick a still from a movie. It’s included after the jump. You head to the comments section and submit your best one-liners, zingers, pathos riddled couplets etc…
2. You can enter as many times as you like and submit as many captions as you want, but each caption must be in a separate comment. Otherwise it will be too hard to tell where one caption ends and the other begins. Your entries can be posted anytime during the first five days after the still is announced (you don’t want to submit your winning zinger after we’ve picked the winner). Also any racist, sexist, homophobic or generally hateful jokes will be disqualified. You don’t have to be insanely PC – just use your best judgement.
3. We pick the winner and announce them and their winning caption when the next photo in the contest is posted. We will address you by your BD Infected name. You can then DM me your address and I will send you your prize in a timely manner (i.e. you should have it in about a week). You must be a US resident to receive your prize!
First Prize is another MYSTERY PRIZE grab-bag of Blus and DVDs.
Head inside for this week’s picture!
![ROTLD Karen Matthews 6 24 12 [BD Caption Contest] Opening Up A New Barrel Of Quotes!](http://cdn.bloody-disgusting.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/06/ROTLD_Karen_Matthews_6_24_12.jpg "ROTLD_Karen_Matthews_6_24_12")
8 Comments
OMG, It’s a naked Amy Winehouse zombie!
Can you believe how bad that movies “Feast” (awkward silence)..that was my son!
Necrophylia is one thing………but with a tranny?
He sounds pretty upset about your Asian impersonations. Yellow zombies don’t take shit.
Frank and Freddy are scarred for life when they stumbled across Burt’s copy of “Octomom: Home Alone.”
not another i love the 80′s special vh1 pllllllllllease!!!!!
Thats the ending to The Grey?!
Did you say they are remaking the Evil Dead????
Yeah that looks infected
This is how Bath Salts feel??
I can’t believe they’re making another Chucky
“I can’t believe your son fucked up Piranha 3DD, all you needed was more tits and gore…MORE TITS AND GORE”
These women looked alot better a the bar last night…right????
the thing that always gets me with the living dead, Freddy, is their fashion sense!
Freddy “Frank, I can’t believe I knocked up Snooki…..”
Frank “Ewwwwwwwww……”
“This Octo-Mom self pleasure video does nothing for me, let’s go back and stare at the dancing punk chick in the cemetery.”
Freddy, “I Knew that yellow guy was hung, but not in that way, Christ Frank!”
Frank, “Oh god, it looks like a giant elbow macaroni…”
Frank: Hey, it smells like my dick!
Freddy: Two bucks says it’s still warm.
Tommy Lee Jones does not age well…
Got Milk?…Take the Diarrhea!!!
ohhh no Linnea Quigley is getting naked again….ahhhh doesnt she know shes 100.
Miss Stone please close your legs!
Twice the girls and twice the cups does not make this any better.
hey frank i just saw betty white naked
frank:ohhhh goddddd
“Oh my god, Its revolting. What is that?”
“I think Its Joan Rivers without makeup”
“She gave him a WHAT?!”
Burt: “Hey boys, does THIS look infected to you?” (unzips his pants)
Freddy : You mean they’re gonna make a sequel to this movie and expect us to return and play two totally different characters?!?!?!!
Frank : OHHHH GODDDDDD!!!!!!!
I don’t know what I was expecting when you asked If I wanted to go to a donkey show.
Ugh it was one of those wet farts you can taste.
Jimmy theres only three skeletons hanging? Wheres the 4th one….Oh Dear Gawd!!!
Why would you buy a movie from The Asylum? Why?
Viewers reactions to George A. Romeros Survival of the Dead
“What do you mean they’re remaking Twilight?!”
freddy: i just saw battleship
frank: OHHHHH GODDDDDDD
frank and freddy’s reaction after seeing the movie the tree of life
Freddy: “What the hell was in that tank?”
Frank: “Beiber Fever!”
We need topical cream!
Freddy: What’s going on over there?
Frank: A marathon of recent Adam Sandler movies.
Both: (think Darren Ewing in Troll 2) Oh my GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOODDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD!!!!!
“I’d still hit it…”
dear diary: we watched “The Miracle of Birth” in health class today…
“They made you watch Alien 3…WITHOUT the director’s cut selected?!”
The world’s reaction to Michael Bay helming the Ninja Turtles reboot.
OMG! It’s a tape of Snooki giving birth! That’s the most revolting thing ever!
freddy: hey frank i just saw jack and jill with tina last night and it was the worst think i have ever seen.
frank: oh ya freddy, i just saw that’s my boy with burt and that was the “worst” thing i ever seen.so you better watch your tongue boy if you like this job.
freddy: like this job. seeing that movie is not my job.
“Alright guys, for this scene. I need the look of dread on your faces. Lets imagine for a moment Roseanne Barr laying nude across this table. Come on guys, she’s ready for the Midnight Meat Train!”
FREDDY: I went to go cremate Jason but I fucked up!
FRANK: What the fuck are you talking about??!!
Every mans reaction to the announcement of the Chaz Bono Sextape.
If I told you once I told you a thousand times. LAY OFF THE MEXICAN FOOD!
Oh My God another episode of the Kardiashians
No No No say it aint so Obama is running again
Burt! We are not proctologists!
I hate having to sit through this part just to get to Linnea Quigley’s nude scene.
You saw “The Sorcerer’s Apprentice”?? Ugh…
This isn’t part of the contest: hey evan, would it kill you to throw out some honorable mentions every week? you know, spread the love around? kinda feeling unappreciated here.
I agree
you reading this, evan? now there’s 2 of us hahaha. the prizes are cool and everything but what really matters most is if we’re making you laugh. that’s all i care about lol.
Noted! I will start in the next round!
“Oh my God, Becky…Look at her butt…”
“How the Hell are we in the sequel!?”
“It’s almost as ugly as that pocket protector, Frank!”
FREDDY “It’s not gonna fit, it’s not gonna fit, it’s not gonna fit… oh-my-dear-lord-jesus, it fit.”
FRANK “And that, Freddy, is why she’s a Kardashian.”
They made how many sequels to this movie?!?
What is Michael Bay doing to those poor turtles?!
How’d you get the beans above the frank?
Ew, that is just bloody disgusting…
“HE PUNCHED THE HIGHLIGHTS OUTTA HER HAIR!!!!!!!!!!!!!” -Scott Pilgrim Vs The World
So that’s two girls, one cup for ya….
Oh dear God, is that…Russel Brand coming this way? Quick, Freddy, before he sees…too late.
So this is A Serbian Film…
Reaction to Abraham Lincoln Vampire Hunter
Tosh struggles to come up with this week’s web redemption
Gah! A piranha took his manhood!
“Did you guys know that Kristen Stewart’s the highest paid actress?”
Platinum Dune’s is prepping a Return of the Living Dead reboot!!!
You guys up for a sequel?!!
“Is that a banana in that yellow guy’s pants, or…. wait, he’s not wearing any pants!!!”
I saw the future, and it’s called “Rave to the Grave”.
frank and freddy’s reaction when they saw the thing prequel
frank and freddy’s reaction after seeing the devil inside
frank and freddy’s after seeing creature
freddy: did you know they moved the G.I.Joe sequel to march of 2013 to in some 3D
frank: OHHHHHHH GOOOODDDDDD
frank and freddy’s reaction when seeing rock of ages
freddy: hey frank, they are now calling it teenage alien ninja turtles then teenage mutant ninja turtles
frank: OHHHHHH JJJJJEEEEESSSSUUUSSS
Freddy: Crap on a crotch! I totally forgot it was picture day!
Frank: My mom loves it when I smile like this.
Frank: Sorry if my hands a little cold. I wasn’t expecting to do a prostate exam… ever.
They were not horrified based on the fact that Snooki is pregnant, but the fact that someone actually wanted to sleep with her.
what you look like when you watch the sorceror’s aprentice.
Octomom is doing porn?
You call this gruyere?
She did what with a crucifix!?
2 girls 1 WHAT!?
what are they doing with that cup? ewwwwwwwwwwwwwww
Where did she get those ping pong balls from?
This isn’t what I wanted when i looked up tubgirl!
“Oh god no, THAT’S The quote that won first prize!?”
Apparently they just had a visit from Samara.
The aftermath of watching Hostel III.
This could be our last night on Earth. You don’t want to die a virgin, do you?
What the hell is that smell?!?!
OOOHHHHH GOOOOODDDDD NO, it smells like, like a used diaper… filled with… Indian food. Oh, excuse me…
What is that? Smells like a turd covered in burnt hair…
It’s a formidable scent… It stings the nostrils. In a good way
Cry ‘Havoc’, and let slip the dogs of war, that this foul deed shall smell above the earth with carrion men, groaning for burial…
The best smell in the world is that of the man you love…
If you can’t smell the one you love, smell the one you’re with…
I didn’t think it was POSSIBLE for Michael Jackson to look any worse!
This was a particularly bad case of somebody being cut in half.
What do you mean, “the only way to stop it is to eat it”???
She took WHAT and put it WHERE???
Oh, gawd… how can he eat that?
Eww… I KNEW he wouldn’t make it to the bathroom!
I don’t care how much I need the money, I do NOT like this job THAT much!
So that’s what happens when you hold in a fart for a week.
Obama actually doing it the Dream act we’re finally free!
Freddy: But we still got 3 more years of keeping up with the kardashians!
What in the hell is Sandusky doing to that little boy over there?
Is it already time for the Olympics again?
This is the typical reaction to most Nic Cage movies.
I am begging you Joan Rivers, please put clothes on
You are never too old to be shown the birds and the bees
“Keep smiling…” “But he doesn’t have any pants on.” “I KNOW, just keep smiling….”
This is why you were told to never make funny faces
Frank and Freddy watch Creature.
You did WHAT to your sea-monkeys??!
EWWWWWW! Why is Mr. Disgusting dressed in drag?
What the hell is Michael Jackson doing with Bubbles ?!?!?!?
NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
Why do we have to watch a Nicole Cage Marathon?
I would rather be eaten by zombies…..
Burt, we’re pretty sure that is NOT how you kill zombies!
Burt just told them that he was on the football team at Penn State.
First time ever watching gay porn.
The severed arm has a hold of our nuts. Aaahhh.
Frank I really hate this job.
That’s the last time I look for a date on craigslist
I’m pretty sure the yellow zombie just farted.
“Quick, give her some brains already damnit!”
“I don’t have any, how ’bout you?”
I swear, she looked much better on her myspace photo.
Tonight on ‘To Catch a Necrophile’…
What the f**k happened to Roger Ebert’s face?!
I knew these Sleepaway Camp kids were crazy, but this is getting out of hand.
Dear god, what is that centipede doing to Kiki?
Did he just stick that jar completely up his… OH GOD!
They’re paying us $7.50 an hour for this!? Forget that, send more paramedics!
WOWWWWWWWW look at the size of thoseeeeeee tits
Oh my god, Betty White is in this issue of Playboy…
Freddy look….it’s two zombies one cup!!!! *insert sick noises*
There’s another Nicholas Cage movie coming out?!
Justin Bieber is a guy?! Freddy, it’s a trap!!!!
“We need a LOT more practice on our “oh” faces.”
HOLY HELL!! Would you please turn off that Octomom porno?!?! I think I’m going to puke…..
they’re going to remake what?
okay next time I’m going to get my mom cremated I know I wanted to see her but my god she should shave!
That’s a Sandusky?
They’re eating her…..then they”re gonna eat us…in the sequel…..Again……OH NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO.
“I warned you two not to dick around with that Chinese finger puzzle. Now where’s my bone saw?”
Oh Shit! This doesn’t look good.
Holy F*ck! A dead girl is coming out of the TV. I’m Out.
just when you thought the micheal jackson’s thriller dance couldnt be more stiff, he just went rigor mortis
Yes dear, that dress does make you look fat…
Hey Frank, know what would really impress me now? If that pocket protector could save us!
OH CRAP George Romero would never be that sick!
Oh God, more news about Lindsay Lohan
If they remake Return of the Living Dead, I’m going to eat you.
This is what happens when you watch Reality TV.
Where is she sticking that corn cob???
Don’t eat those bath salts!!!
That is not how babies are born man! She has a Stargate for a vagina!
I told you to pick a movie that we could relate to. There is no way I relate to The Human Centipede. Do you see where one person ends and the other begins?
He has to cut the placenta with his teeth to get the baby out? Teenage girls watch this?!
They were warned NOT to disturb Burt during lunch hour.
“What’s the matter? Never seen a grown zombie naked?”
THAT’S Lil’ Kim?!
OH MY GOD! These zombies smell like taco farts….
When Ernie said he had a naked girl lying on a table in his embalming room I just assumed she’d be hot.
Two girls one cup? That’s disgusting is that what those freaks will watch in the future?
Jesus Rosie O’Donnell put your clothes back on!
You mean that’s Rose McGowan?! What did you do to her face!?
Although it was just a mirror, the two couldn’t believe how shiny these guys’ teeth were!
So that’s what that was. It sure tasted like shrimp to me!
Too many comments to them watching a shitty movie. Boring.
Agreed.
“Walking in on your parents”
“She’s got a d*ck!”
…and suddenly the fish swam up the man’s urethra.
They did what? The British Olympics won’t have the Old Beckham play, eh? What Absurdity!
The Miami Face Eater only smoked weed OMG!
Now, now, now…I want Lima beans in my salad not my kidneys.
Manos The Hands of Fate on Blu-Ray?
We came all this way for the Zombie Hokey Pokey?
No. PLEASE. No more Adam Sandler, no more Adam Sandler.
Barney re-runs!
No Chris don’t strip. We loved you in Dracula, but don’t strip!
Keanu Reeves does birthdays? There is no cake. There is no cake.
Liver alone. I know its Lady Gaga. But liver alone.
He’s your mannequin? But Justin Bieber doesn’t work with the drapes.
Narrator, “Well my friends, that’s the story of how Freddy got fingered. As for Frank? Well…he dealt with a fisting on that day himself.”
Gross! Zombie cock n balls. And the smell…ehhh!
William Hung is doing a comeback tour, please god no.
I told you we shouldn’t have watched the Oprah sex tape.
Rob Schneider is getting is own sitcom? What the hell were the producers smoking?
Bill and Ted: The Later Years
Guy 1: Uhuhuhuh
Guy 2: hehemehehe
Guy 1: uhuhuhu shut up Beavis!
we shriek in your general direction
Bloody Disgusting staff reading Caption Contest quotes.
HA!
“…Where’s you’re other hand?”
“Between two pillows…”
“THOSE AREN’T PILLOWS!”
Two thieves break into BD HQ disgusted at what they find. “Is that this week’s mystery prize?” the older thieve said. “Yeah i think it is…..Is it strange that I’m kinda aroused?”said the younger thieve. “Naw kid I am too.” replied the other.
“…Where’s your other hand…?”
“Between two pillows…”
“THOSE AREN’T PILLOWS!!!”
Bitter beer face.
Quick, Fred! Let’s show ‘em our mad dog faces.
“We’re about to die, but don’t worry! My pocket is protected!”
“Send more suspenders and pocket protectors.”
Ah yes. Gotta love the days before teeth whitening.
but i dont wanna put tarman away!!
They cancelled Shark Week!!!
Dang, we should of never dared each other to take shots of turbo lax
A half-dog erection is, simply put, not pretty…
Thanks guys! A winner will be posted later this afternoon!
…Two Girls?!? One Cup?!??? That Ernie is one sick sumbitch!!!
My apologies to Lowcarb… didnt realize you used the two girls one cup reference . . . Retract my post.
Frank: “Oh god the kids are starting to dress like its the 80′s again!”
Freddie: “You mean I looked that douchey back then!?”
Actually – we are trying something new with the caption contest. It’ll be up tomorrow morning
“They split the last Twilight book up into two movie?”
“NOOOOOOOOO!”
“The canister’s been opened already so I called the number on the side and they asked what was inside”
“Well, what was it!?”
“Bath Salts.”
You hard? Yeah. Me too.
I HATE watching people put in contacts!
Tom and Kat are over?? No!!! It can’t be true!!
Magic Mike??!!
When they said to “Cut off their heads”, did they mean….My God!!!!
Oh shit! Is that Romero?
not another hell raiser commercial.
i called using the bathroom fir…. nevermind you can go
why are we crying? i don’t maybe we should stop watching lassie after the funereal’s.
Diablo Cody!?