Oh hey, I didn’t see you there!
I don’t have anything against Christmas Eve or Christmas Day. I enjoy spending time with my family and actually like this time of year because of it. But if you’re home for the holidays, chances are you have very little control over what’s playing on the house TV. It’s just sort of on, right? No one in particular seems to be paying attention – and if there’s a movie playing it probably takes place during the holidays but no one seems to actually be watching it.
Here’s where these 5 movies come in. Should you be able to sneak control over your family’s home entertainment setup, you can toss a few of these guys on. After all, they’re technically holiday movies. Your parents didn’t specifically say they couldn’t contain murder and mayhem.
Head inside to check out 5 Horror Movies To Watch On Christmas!
The most obvious choice, but also the best. Gremlins is one of my favorite movies, hands down. Such a beautifully structured film with a great amount of carnage but also a strong sense of fun. It’s also a movie that feels warmly towards the season but doesn’t have a problem criticizing it either. From Phoebe Cates’ horrific monologue to the film’s final assertion that western society just isn’t ready to deal with their gifts, Gremlins packs the darkness but wraps it inside a warm, fuzzy feeling. Kind of like the biological cycle of the film’s creatures, come to think of it.
SILENT NIGHT, DEADLY NIGHT
One thing the 1984 original has over this year’s remake is a sense of grainy, shot-on-film nostalgia. It still has its share of intense moments, but its overall slower pace means that there’s a slightly lower chance that your parents will yell at you to turn it off.
You can’t get in trouble for this one, it actually has Santa in it! To be fair, he’s a bit more of an *sshole here than society traditionally depicts him as, but it’s still fair game. Also, this thing has enough camp appeal that you run the risk of actually being kind of a hero to your family. Maybe they drop everything they’re doing, watch along and it becomes a new holiday tradition. Probably not, but you can hope, right?
This one doesn’t feel quite as Christmas-ish but it’s a bona fide instant classic, which more than makes up for it. Alexandre Bustillo and Julien Maury’s debut feature brings the gore, and it’s also legitimately terrifying. Out of the whole bunch, this is the one that will make your parents scream “what’s wrong with you?”
It’s been so damn long since I’ve seen this movie that I might have to take my own advice and watch it alongside you today. I remember almost nothing except for liking it on whichever night I was able to sneak down into the living room as a kid to watch it. Weird blind spot, I know. Olivia Hussey, John Saxon and Margot Kidder? Murder, sororities and Christmas? Let’s make it happen.
this week in horror
This Week in Horror - May 1, 2017 - The Mist, Hellboy, Michael...
The Mist has an extra gory new trailer, Hellboy is getting an R-rated reboot, and legendary actor Michael Parks passed away.Posted by Bloody-Disgusting on Wednesday, May 17, 2017
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