[BD Caption Contest] Win ‘A Haunted House’ Poster And T-Shirt Signed By The Cast!!
The First Prize winner this week is BornVillain (please DM me your US mailing address) you get Jaume Balagueró’s Sleep Tight on Blu-ray!
![BornVillain Sleep Tight 1 9 13 [BD Caption Contest] Win A Haunted House Poster And T Shirt Signed By The Cast!!](http://cdn.bloody-disgusting.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/01/BornVillain_Sleep_Tight_1_9_13.jpg "BornVillain_Sleep_Tight_1_9_13")
This week’s prize is a poster and T-shirt for Open Road’s A Haunted House! They are signed by cast members Marlon Wayans, Essence Atkins, Affion Crockett and David Koechner. The film opens on Friday, January 11th! We have 3 sets to give away – so 1st, 2nd and 3rd place winners all get prizes!
Head inside to see the Runner-Ups for last week’s contest and to start this week’s contest!
![PyrePunk Sleep Tight 1 9 13 [BD Caption Contest] Win A Haunted House Poster And T Shirt Signed By The Cast!!](http://cdn.bloody-disgusting.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/01/PyrePunk_Sleep_Tight_1_9_13.jpg "PyrePunk_Sleep_Tight_1_9_13")
![JardoHorror Sleep Tight 1 9 13 [BD Caption Contest] Win A Haunted House Poster And T Shirt Signed By The Cast!!](http://cdn.bloody-disgusting.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/01/JardoHorror_Sleep_Tight_1_9_13.jpg "JardoHorror_Sleep_Tight_1_9_13")
Our runner-ups are pyrepunk (top) and JardoHorror (bottom)! Please DM me your US Mailing Addresses! You get Sleep Tight on Blu-ray!
Rules:
1. We pick a still from a movie – or in this cas a clip from a movie. You head to the comments section and submit your best one-liners, zingers, pathos riddled couplets etc… In this week’s case you have to do is come up with a caption from the video below! It can be from the POV of one of the characters, or a comment on it as a whole!
2. You can enter as many times as you like and submit as many captions as you want, but each caption must be in a separate comment. Otherwise it will be too hard to tell where one caption ends and the other begins. Your entries can be posted anytime after the still is announced – just be sure to check that I haven’t announced that the contest is closed in the comments (you don’t want to submit your winning zinger after we’ve picked the winner). Also any racist, sexist, homophobic or generally hateful jokes will be disqualified. You don’t have to be insanely PC – just use your best judgement. Try and keep it brief! It has to fit on the photo now!
3. We pick the winner and announce them and their winning caption when the next photo in the contest is posted. We will address you by your BD Infected name. You can then DM me your US mailing address (no PO boxes) and I will send you your prize in a timely manner (i.e. you should have it in a couple of weeks). You must be a US resident to receive your prize!
![A Haunted House Caption 1 9 13 [BD Caption Contest] Win A Haunted House Poster And T Shirt Signed By The Cast!!](http://cdn.bloody-disgusting.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/01/A_Haunted_House_Caption_1_9_13.jpg "A Haunted House - Caption Contest Full")
1 Comments
Ssshhh we’re not spoofing American Horror Story till the next movie
I was wondering what would break first….. your SPIRIT or your SEXUALITY
And this is why I can never take you out into public.
No matter how hard you try it wont be as good as Scary Movie 1 or 2.
my finger smells like happy
How many times have i told you! Its animal suits that turn me on!
Whoops…….Wrong hole
How’d you know…..I like leather
I like my coffee black…..like my men
We’re going to re-enact that scene from Pulp Fiction……I’ll be your Bruce Willis!
This is what you get for selling drugs Tyrone
And I thought this sweater made me look gay
This is my finger Cortez, he’ll break you in.
Shhhhhh Don’t speak……it’ll ruin the moment
I am both an analyst and a therapist. An analrapist if you may.
If I poke your chest piece…will you transform?
Where did that ball come from? I knew mom get me a magician!
How much does a nice pleasant lunch on the beach cost?
I paid you 300 bucks! You’re going to pull my finger.
Remember — It’s our secret!!
So in this scene Django reunites with Broonhilde…
Listen, your supposed to be asleep “Gimp”.
Shhhh, we have a little surprise for a boxer and a guy named Marcellus Wallace in the next room. Ready for some fun?
I don’t know why I’m telling you to be quiet…You have a ball in your mouth.
Damit quit your moaning. I’ll let you go if you promise not to hurt Zed.
Yeah so what, If I say bondage is in then it’s in. Get it!
No, your not gonna be the bitch this time. Do I look like a liar to you?
If you can keep a secret , I wont tell you where that ball has been.
Be quiet! Do you want to see Britney Spears or not?
Just let me do the talking. Either you will get a role in A Serbian Film Pt. 2 or a crazy check one.
You ready to audition for the newest Disney movie or not? Just Nod!
Don’t say a word, nobody will know its Brad Pitt is disquise.
I know it looks funny, but it’s the best Darth Vader costume we could get.
Now be quiet, we gotta go to church.
Before you came along, nobody even heard of a “Gimp”. So shut up and follow my lead!
shhhhh Mr. Spielberg does not like his playthings to talk.
Shhhh Mr. Spielberg said the safe word is E.T.
Be quiet Stedman!! Oprah said if you stop whining she will remove the ball gag!!
Don’t tell anyone.
This is just a normal Sunday for me.
Don’t tell me this is the most embarrassing thing you’ve done. I’ve seen “The White Chicks”…
I had to do the same thing for Adam Sandler to be in his movies…
Let me reiterate, Mr. Travolta does not want anyone to know about this…
seriously these winning comments are fucking retarded
Quiet Mr. President! Biden might hear!
Shhh, this is our chance to get David Zucker back
The safe word is Micah
Coming soon from Tarantino…
The Village People
Shhhh, I can’t wait to see the expression on my parents face when they see my date tonight.
I had to put the ball in your mouth so you would quit goin on how good “White Chicks” was…
So you ready to be the new Scout master?
Jeez, you may be my brother but please shut up about Judge Wopner.
Now if you cooperate, there’s a milk bone in it for ya.
Who’s judging these comments? The winning entries are fucking stupid.
You’ve got to lick it, before you stick it!
One more sound and I’m gonna lick this thing.
I will stick this finger up your nose faster than you can say “grandma”.
“Shh, Mr. Disgusting is having his nappy time.”
“Mkey, Ahvin.”
Mistriss Bill never quite understood the concept of the gagball.
Its like telling a blind man not to look!
Does this gimp outfit make me look gay?
Shhh…
This is good for your career. I promise.
How many times have i told you? Its Leatherface, not Rubberface!
Ssshhh! The same word is Bloody Disgusting
Ssshhh! The safe word is Bloody Disgusting
Now I look over dressed! You do this everytime!
You have to promise you wont let Jason Friedberg & Aaron Seltzer anywhere near this series.
I believe youre on the wrong set….This is To Catch a Predator The Movie.
Shhhh…don’t tell Rhames.
@Ravinus, i agree w/ you. the winning entries weren’t very funny IMO. there were tons of far funnier comments than what won (no offense to the winners).
@djblack1313 @Ravinus – I might also have a different sense of humor. Also, we get a lot of responses that *could* be seen as homophobic/racist. Not saying they are – just saying that it’s hard for me to put that stuff in a Meme on the front page. For Poltergeist 2 we got some incest stuff couldn’t use it.
There’s also a language thing. If it’s REALLY gross, it might be funny to me but again I would have to censor if I was going to make it a giant image on the front page and I don’t want to censor you guys.
Whatever sandler wants…sandler gets!
Shusssh…..Welcome to Nick Swardson’s Pretend Time.
Sshhhhhhh….trust me this is how Jamie foxx won the django role.
Shhhhh….welcome to sex toy story.
Quiet! We want to make sure Prince is surprised.
’50 Shades of Grey’? More like ’100 Shades of Bullcrap’, to me.
One…. singular sensation, every little move he makes.
Damn, those chains must be cold.
And to all those out there who thought Hollywood could not get more ridiculous then the Batman costumes…. TADA!
Shhh. They are about to start shooting Prince’s new video. Get ready for your cue.
These contests are such bullshit, the dude bitches about being a runner up
and he wins this contest.
@grayghost – Actually he would have been a winner a few times by now except I thought he lived in the UK – so I was intentionally avoided prizing him. It was my mistake. cc @BornVillain
Shhh…
..It’s not gay unless you get caught.
Nooo….not s&m
…I said i like the brown m&m’s
So let me get this right…
..this is what you do to lose weight.
So this is how it feels like when doves cry
Hey….your balls are showing
Remember, Steve Ballmer is the bald guy.
Sshh… This is you punishment for “Little Man”
Give me my Blankman DVD back and THEN you could dress
Sshh… Everyone knows Shawn was the favorite “Wayans Brother”
Sshh… I got you this from the “Pulp Fiction” collection for you.
I didn’t know that the Rubberman from American Horror Story got his own spin-off show
Ssshh….No ones that the Rubberman from American Horror Story will be getting his own show soon.
mmph mmph mmphmmph…
…What’s that ….”get medieval on your ass.”
OMG, you look fabulous…
..Lady Gaga you out did yourself.
Okay, so the safe word will be..”huge flop”
It’s fun to stay at the….
..YMC Oh just bend over.
Shhhh. You had me at AHGNIRJWOCLCHAHNCM.
Be quiet and we will play a game…It’s called “hide the gerbil”.
Oh shut up. This is for all those bad movies you made!
Remember there is nothing we wont do to make it on American Idol.
Be quiet! If you say “Little man or White Chicks” are good movies one more time. I’ll stick that ball where the sun don’t shine.
Shut up with the moaning…Or I’ll take away all your R. Kelly Pictures.
Calm down! Were just gonna get you baptized is all.
Just remember, “All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy”.
Excuse me, you seem like a nice guy. I seem to have glued my finger to my face, could you help me out?
Damnit I told you, it’s not a Troma film.
I will not have tears of shame in my house!
What do you mean my vest looks ridiculous?
I told you once before if you are bad you get a serious time out! Now bend over big boy!
Wait a minute- I have to sneeze.
Shhh…..you know what you need to do in order to get a Wayans movie in theaters.
Am I into S&M….
..Sure, he snores and I masturbate.
So is this what you think it’s gonna take to be one of the Fly Girl dancers
On the count of three i want you to try and blow that ball out of your mouth…
..reeady…1
Wait just a damn minute! My daughter is not going out with a man who has balls in his mouth!.
Now remember the safe word is “Sally sell’s seashells by the seashore”. Try it now…
Shhh…Be very quiet, I am hunting a gimp.
Shhhh, I don’t want the wife to know.
Be quiet, I want to surprise the family by bringing Jamie Fox home for dinner.
Give me a sec, Ok “David Carradine”. Told ya I was good at Charades!
I guess you know by now, who will be receiving…
I see we both shop at the same place…”Gimp’s of Hollywood”.
Now play nice and I’ll give you a little treat called chloroform.
I think you look like a fool. To bad I have this in my mouth or I would say so!
Meanwhile, back at Wayans Manor…Alfred the butler is keeping a secret from master Dwayne.
One more word, and I’ll say you co-wrote Scary Movie 5.
THIS MANY! THIS MANY! ONE!
…………..Damn, give a guy a ball gag and he wants everything!
I am 3 seconds away from not giving you a spanking!!!
I bet you can’t do that with a baseball.
WWE paid us good money.
Now keep quiet till your entrance music starts.
Be quiet.
We are trying to save your career.
Quiet.
Let your nipples talk for you.
Sshhhhh…..don’t tell anyone.
The “big American celebrity” appearance in Human Centipede 3 is just someone jerking off with sandpaper over a picture of Lindsay Lohan.
So you really can do what you want to do…
in living color.
Look you familiar to me..
…. ’94, LA, pawn shop basement, wooden crate…no never mind
You look familiar to me…
..’94, LAA, pawn shop basement, wooden crate…No nevermind.
You’d rather wear that..
..then this sweater vest.
Funny thing about this…I really could give two shits about the prize for this contest…I just like coming up with funny caption..thats my problem…this is an all things horror website…thats why all the captions that win are… horrifyingly bad.
I’m sorry I’m just pissed I didn’t win the Blade Runner contest.
Oh dear, hasn’t anybody told you? “Zed is dead baby”.
Please sir, I already told Mr. Tarintino and he won’t be filming “The Vega Brothers”.
Don’t tell anybody, but I love the red ball. It matches my blue ones!
Take that ball out of your mouth and tell Carol Ann to run away from the light!
If I didnt know any better I say you were trying to seduce me.
Well play sir, well played. You know my one weakness.
Dr. Oz and the Big “O” will see you now…
American Apparel… Not just for the ladies.
Please arrive 1 hour early for your colonoscopy.
I just have one question….Did you and Steve-O have a nice visit?
Wait just a minute…It’s not Halloween! What the hell do you wan’t?
I got it. Your Morgan Freeman when he first arrived at Shawshank!
Mr. Wallace told me to be expecting you. Your here to “Get medieval on a Mr. Rapist”. Right this way.
Promise not to tell and I’ll get the sheep!
Quit your moaning and lets play doctor and patient…First I give you a shot. Don’t worry it’s just a little prick!
Please Mr. President….Don’t tell the other Secret Service guys. They already make fun of the way I dress!
Excuse me, but is that a bogger?
Everlasting Gobstoppers…You can suck them and suck them and suck them and they’ll never get any smaller. Never!
Would you be mine? Could you be mine?….
…Won’t you be my neighbor ?
Shhh, the Gimp’s sleeping.
I need you to be quiet. You know I can’t come if you’re crying
Gonna be here a while……..Grab a snickers
Shhhhhh taste the rainbow. That’s when you know you did your job.
On the last episode of keeping up with the kardashians.
“One….singular sensation
Every little step he takes.”
SHSHHHHHHH. ITS OK.
I WONT TELL ANYONE YOU CRIED ..
Django 2: Django Re-Chained
If this doesn’t win I’m going to be so, so sad. Freaking hilarious.
It’s actually funny so it probably won’t win.
I like this one too..I just wish it was
Django 2: Back in chains
..but it’s your caption I’m not touching it.
I was almost too afraid to post it. I’m glad ya’ll like it
@AdamDodd @TrixieMalicious @Superkilla @grayghost Guys, I think it’s really funny. But I’ wrestling with putting a giant slavery meme on the front page.
This one takes the cake, hands down (perhaps even gagged and blindfolded, too, one might conclude)! So spot on.
Shhh… I was never in Bucky Larson…
Hey listen. If you can keep a secret, so can I.
As your attorney I advise you to never speak of this again….Otherwise I’ll tell Marcellus where you live!
Shhhh, Just let me look at ya and savor the moment…I want this to be special!
If you be quiet I’ll remove that red ball and replace it with my blue one’s.
Lets get one thing straight….I’m not gay! But I do experiment!
Quit mumbling and listen to me….Since the divorce I’ve been so lonely.
I could not listen to how good your movies are. So until you can think of something else to talk about, enjoy the gag ball.
Hush little baby don’t say a word. Daddy’s gonna knock loose a turd!
Shhhh. Or I’ll show you where I put the 9 ball.
gimp: Didn’t pretend time get cancelled…
nick: shhhhhhhhh
Quit that crying or I’ll give you something to cry about…
Not another word out of you….Welcome to Shawshank!
Shhhh, it’s to soon.
(muffled) Too soon for what?
John Wayne Gacy Jokes…
Now you play nice and no trying to scream and I’ll play some Barry Manilow and some Liberache cd’s and after we can watch some Disney movies togeather….
Before we begin…I just want to make sure your not racist against white people are you Django? What’s that I can’t hear you?
Dear Mom & Dad, here is a pic of my big day…Mr. Farmer would not even let me say “I do”. Ps. Tell dad thanks for letting me use his ball. Love, The Gimp…
Looks like the Collector became the Receiver.
Ya know the more I think about it, spiders coming out of his mouth might of been more scary then a apple.
The Gimp getting married.
Did your mistress tell you to say “I do”?
What’s that? I can’t hear you? Have your way with me? Well if you insist!
I bet I can get that ball out of your mouth without using my hands.
Oh shut up, course my finger is clean.
I think you and I both know where my finger is going.
I think we all shot our collective loads with this contest…let’s wrap it up and start a new one.
I’d give it to TrixieMalicious
Lets see…yep should of used a blue ball.
It’s that ball or my finger your choice?
No yelling, I told my daughter I would get her a boyfriend.
Please don’t tell that I wear glasses….I lost my contacts!
Shhhhhh… Just relax, it only hurts for a second
Shhhhh…Ok time to tell Manti Te’o I have his girlfriend.
This is the last time I let anybody fix me up on a blind date….
Yes, I think after your last movie a disguise is a good idea…Nobody will every know it’s you.
Ok, Ill remove the gag ball if you promise to scream when we get to the basement.
No my daughter can’t go out with you dressed like that….Why you’ll catch your death of cold.
I really hate to say anything….But you have a booger hanging down!
Just wait here….I told my wife to bring home brown M&M’s not brown S&M’S.
plagiarism is the purest form of flattery…I guess
My apologies I never realized you had posted something similar.
No worries… I get a little whiney sometimes..
Maybe I need a gag ball in my mouth.
Don’t tell Adam Sandler I was here. He’ll beat me.
Is it secret? Is it chafed?
SSHHH… We told you Kanye, you have to keep this on until Taylor Swift is done with her acceptance speech
Tony had been getting Danny into more and more trouble since the shining
Shut up! Maybe no one will review the movie.
Haha “Its just you and me lamp”. Nice.
Nooit gedacht dat ik geld zou verdienen met deze” Hoe word ik rijk methode“!
Ik weet niet over het krijgen van rijk … maar je kon krijgen bekendheid.
I can’t believe you rubbed your nuts on this ball before I put it in my mouth
Sshhh, or I’ll shove my balls in your mouth.
Please no tears, it’s such a waste of good suffering!
If you don’t quit with all that moaning, I’ll make you watch White Chicks 100 time’s.
Shhh, you want to make fifty bucks? The easy way!
“Requiem For A Dream” was great. But this is for the rest of your so called movies.
Just shut up Marlon. I already told you were not shooting “A Serbian film 2.”
Mr. President you better get ready your Inauguration..
..and stop acting out ’50 shades’ with Biden
Obama… you’re so fine… you’re so fine you blow my mind.. Obama ..Obama
(sung to the tune of Oh Mickey by Toni Basil)
Nooo..I didn’t say we are going to Crate and Barrel,
..I said you are going in a crate.
Hey I see a pentagon!
My version of Bane for The Dark Knight Rises. I even solved the voice problem.
How many times do I have to tell you, “stop talking with balls in your mouth.”
American Horror Story casting is that way.
“Is that a ball in your mouth? Or are you happy to see me”
“First Exclusive Photo of the He-Man Reboot”
Hey I’m over here. I took care of your mouth not your eyes!
Who’s Number 1? I can’t hear you….oh right.
Oh man everyone is gonna think you are so hot…than I’m gonna take off the mask.
Hey you found a way to stop the Chestbusters!
Hey you found a way to stop the Chestbursters!
You think you got it bad. I have a splinter!
I’m about to pick my ass and flick it at you….If you have a problem, just say so.
One more word out of you…
….and I’ll put you in the basement with that crazy bitch from Evil dead
Come on let’s sing it together…..”Who can take a sunrise”…..come on sing.. “sprinkle it with dew” ..make sammy proud…
“Cover it with choc’late and a miracle or two” :::mumbling:: “Mu Ka’he meh hen Mu Ka’he meh hen” Good..now let’s go see if the spider caught anything.
End scene
Shhhh, my wife will be home any minute. I want her to be surprised…
Quiet child. Don’t be so insecure. Grandma is going to eat you up.
Weaawy, whdfk ahm i ghahna aye whth ah bah ghahg n my mth
ahhoe
follow my finger and say Pneumonoultramicroscopicsilicovolcanoconiosis
Shhhh…Don’t tell mom the babysitter’s dead!
Shhh… Just whistle when it hurts.
…and our safeword shall be “supercalifragilisticexpialidocious”.
ssshhhhhhhhhhh…. i willn’t tell mom if you don’t tell her.
Hush those chocolatey lips and cough like I asked…