By Zena S. Dixon.
It’s time to go back to school! Get your pencils ready, dust your books off and lets bring out the horror! Maybe you’re starting school, maybe your kid is starting school…or maybe you don’t need school because you’re one of those rare, lucky individuals who excel without it. Depending on the position you’re in, this list will make you dread going back to school or happy to know you’re pretty safe…for now. Either way, let us all indulge!
Although there were many candidates for this list, I decided to go with these 15 films! As a bonus, these horrors contain survival tips for the school year. So let’s get ready for Back to School: TOP 15 School Horrors!
Post will contain spoilers, so BEWARE! Rawr!
This glorious cheese fest of a slasher takes place just a few weeks before graduation day at Midville High School. Unfortunately for students, getting people to sign their yearbook is the LAST of their troubles. Lurking around campus is a mysterious psychopath who slashes people’s guts out. And what makes it worse is that he or she insists on using a timer.
Tip? Graduate early to avoid a splatter fest.
Planning on joining a sorority? Well don’t!
What would High School be without popularity? Ask Tamara. Tamara is an unpopular and unattractive girl who is picked on by her peers. Not only is Tamara a witch, but she accidentally gets murdered. Don’t cry though. She comes back as a seductress, sex kitten on the road for revenge against those responsible.
We learned this one in kindergarden people! Be nice to everyone because you never know what people know about you or if they are witches who can come back from the dead to kill you. They may even make you eat a glass or perhaps your own fingers.
Sisters Ginger and Brigitte have an obsession with death and gore. Alienation in school becomes the least of their troubles once Ginger is attacked by a werewolf. Geez. Going through puberty is tough enough, but imagine growing hair all over your body and having a thirst for blood.
Tip: When turning into a werewolf, keep your thirst for blood minimal by avoiding large crowds… unless it’s with people you don’t like, then go for it! Good luck!
Who needs class when you have metal? Eddie is an outcast because of his preference of music…. Clearly it sucked to be him back in ’86! If he was around today and was a huge fan of metal, I doubt that porky jocks with stiff hair would attack him in empty wood shop classes.
If you idolize a rock star, lets hope he doesn’t send you a demonic record when he dies or makes you a mix tape that melts your ears off as soon as it plays.
I’m sure we’ve all had a secret admirer! Well, this movie has one of those in it. Back in 1982 at Crippen High School, there was a blood bath of horrors; however, the killer was never identified. Five years later, a movie production company comes to the abandoned campus to make a movie based on the previous deadly events.
Tip for this one: If you have a secret admirer, run.
From this horror, you should take away the simple lesson: Don’t follow the crowd. If 54 people simultaneously jump onto the path of an ongoing train…it doesn’t mean you have to!
This movie is a lot like teen pregnancy. Bottom line, don’t end up a zombie, or worse, a cast member on Teen Mom. But if it happens, just remember that I warned you about those sneaky people.
Remember when I said be nice to everyone? Well, be nice includes not doing spells and putting curses on other people!
Important note: Just because you’re in school doesn’t mean you’re safe from wackos. If something bad goes down remember: EVERYONE is a suspect. So if you keep this simple rule of horror, you should be very proud and very safe! Thanks, Randy.
You better hope that Elijah Woods attends whatever school you or your loved ones attend if you want to feel safe from aliens.
Geez. Wouldn’t career day be so much easier if you already knew you had to be a Vampire Slayer?
Poor Carrie. She’s super shy and her mom is crazy terrifying. She already doesn’t fit in, it doesn’t help that she discovers her telekinesis ability. Unfortunately, when she’s pushed to the limit on Prom, people will pay.
My advice? If there is a girl named Carrie, just skip the prom or any similar events. It’s all overrated at that point!
Why not just wait to get your revenge at the 10 year reunion? And maybe it can be emotional revenge, why does it always have to physical?
In every school there is a Queen B, in this one there’s a terrifying Black Queen. Suzy arrives from America to the prestigious dance academy in Germany, only to suspect that there is something evil going on behind closed doors. Eventually, Suzy will unveil the dark history of her new school.
If you can’t beat the Queen B, either join her or go against her, either way it can be haunting.
Wishing all the students a wonderful, horrific school year. If this was your Back to School: TOP 15 School Horrors, what would be on your list?
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