Editorials
In Defense Of ‘Sorority Row’
A common complaint about this series of editorials is that we are apparently defending movies that don’t need a defense. I would just like to point out that we are writing these “In Defense Of” pieces not because we think they are bad movies, but because we really enjoy them and have had personal experience with people bashing them to our faces (or in the comments section of a message board). So today I will defend Sorority Row, a movie that is not beloved by even those of us in the horror community. It received a slightly above-average review right here on Bloody-Disgusting but it currently stands at a paltry 22% on Rotten Tomatoes and a 24 score on Metacritic. And I love it. So let’s dive right in, shall we?
Sorority Row has a pretty generic plot that has been use several times before (think I Know What You Did Last Summer), but the plot isn’t really the point of the film. This is a funny, bitchy and gory film that exists solely to entertain and I would argue is better than about 80% of the slashers that have come out in the past decade. I know the whole “it’s not trying to be good” is kind of a lame defense but hear me out: if you think of this movie as a cross between Mean Girls and Scream I think you might be able to see it in a different light and really enjoy it. I believe Sorority Row suffers from the same issue that Drag Me to Hell suffered from upon its release earlier that year: being marketed with a trailer that made it look like a legitimate horror film. Also, The Hills alum Audrina Partridge was in it (although she dies about 15 minutes into the film).
I really love the trailer, but it definitely makes it look like more of a straightforward slasher than it actually is. Like I mentioned in my defense of Drag Me to Hell, Sorority Row is a horror comedy that was marketed as a scary movie. Studios need to learn that you cannot do that because, while the horror fans may get it (though clearly they didn’t make it to the theater for this one), the mainstream does not. At least DMTH made some money. Sorority Row only made $11.96 million domestically on a $12.5 million budget (international box office was $15.24 million which is something, I guess).
I only happened to catch Sorority Row in theaters because I got free tickets for it. I took two of my friends and we pretty much all went in with zero expectations. Once the credits started rolling I looked at one of my friends and asked him if he thought it was as much fun as I did. His response was a very reluctant (but equally enthusiastic) “YES. But no one is going to believe me.” True story. The film never caught on and it has yet to become a cult hit (and I don’t think it will).
The cast is mostly great, thanks to all of the female actresses involved (they certainly look the part of sorority girls). The male characters in the film are reduced to horny douchebags but the girls all have their own distinct personalities (or stereotypes if you want to go negative) and none of them got on my nerves (except maybe Rumer Willis’ Ellie, but at least the movie makes fun of her constant whining). I get that self-aware films are not to everyone’s taste but I think it’s better when a movie can take the criticisms that an audience member would throw at it and lampoon them. Sorority Row does just that.
Leah Pipes is a revelation in Sorority Row and I’m kind of bummed she hasn’t gotten more steady work. She channels her inner Heather Chandler/Regina George to play Jessica and delivers most of the film’s acidic one-liners. My personal favorite being this exchange when her and Cassidy (Briana Evigan) are hiding in a bathroom only to find Megan’s (Audrina Partridge) rotting corpse in the shower:
Cassidy: Oh my God it’s Megan!
Jessica: Oh she looks terrible…
That doesn’t really do the scene justice but I busted out laughing the first time I saw that. The dialogue is fantastic in this movie and there are SO MANY biting quips that I don’t know how anyone is not entertained by it. Then again, that may be part of the reason why people weren’t such huge fans. I actually thought the dialogue was really witty and clever, but maybe I’m just easy to please.
One thing I would like to suggest all of you do (if you like the movie) is watch the commentary with director Stewart Hendler and actresses Briana Evigan, Leah Pipes, Rumer Willis and Margo Harshman (Jamie Chung was unable to attend because she was filming Grown Ups, of all things). It’s very conversational and shows that the crew had a good time working on it. I just think it’s refreshing to see the actresses be so down to earth and really into the film.
***SPOILERS***
Oh and the KILLS! One thing that I’ve found in a lot of post-2000 slashers are that the deaths aren’t really that creative (excluding the Final Destination series, of course). While the deaths in Sorority Row aren’t the best ever, they at least show some imagination. Also, since it’s R-rated, they can actually show some gore (though the film isn’t really what I’d call super gory). Sadly, the film does peak early with Chugs’ death, involving a Riesling bottle being shoved down her throat. It’s shame this moment was ruined in the trailer (and that Chugs was the funniest character in the film). That aside, there are flares in mouths, axes in heads and tire irons blades in mouths and shoved up chins. They didn’t hold back on this one.
As for the ending, I can honestly say that I did not see the reveal of the killer coming. The entire time I was in the theater I thought it was going to be Kyle, Jessica’s politically-motivated boyfriend who had clearly been set up to be the killer. Looking back, this was obviously a red herring, but because I went into Sorority Row thinking that it was going to be another dumb slasher I thought that was all the ambition the filmmakers had so they were just going to take the obvious route. They even have a whole bit at the end with Kyle actually having a mental breakdown and chasing Jessica and Cassidy with an ax. When Cassidy’s boyfriend Andy “saves the day” and kills Kyle with said ax, I was really let down and kind of bummed that that was the big reveal I had spent the whole movie waiting for. Then BAM! Andy’s actually the killer and his motive is that he wants to get rid of all the people involved in Megan’s murder so she can have a bright future with him.
It is completely ridiculous makes no sense but I think it’s fantastic. It’s not the best motive or reveal ever but I think that because I was really expecting something predictable, I had the rug pulled out from under me. I read a lot of reviews and comments saying that the movie was predictable and I just didn’t feel that way. But maybe it’s just me? I hope you don’t think I’m a fool for falling for Sorority Row’s trick, but I confess to being taken completely off guard.
So what say you? If you have seen the Sorority Row but weren’t that impressed, feel free to tell me why. And if you saw it and were as surprised as I was at how much fun it was, feel free to offer me some validation in the comments. Let’s try to be nice and avoid any rudeness or sarcasm though, because:
It’s been 75 years since The Thing From Another World first warned us to “watch the skies”, and filmgoers have done just that by showing up to multiple instances of extraterrestrial contact on the big screen. This makes sense, as a recent CBS news poll estimated that 63% of Americans believe in intelligent life on other planets, and the ongoing disclosure movement aims to raise that number with each passing day.
With Steven Spielberg’s Disclosure Day leaving many genre fans hungry for more alien footage (preferably of the spooky variety), today I’d like to share a list recommending six underrated alien invasion thrillers for your viewing pleasure. After all, regardless of whether or not you believe that we’re alone in the universe, it can be fun to dream about the worst-case scenario if our cosmic neighbors ever decide to visit.
For the purposes of this list, we’ll be focusing on lesser-known invasion stories rather than the popular extraterrestrials of franchises like Alien and Close Encounters of the Third (or even Fourth) Kind. That being said, don’t forget to comment below with your own alien favorites if you think we missed a particularly thrilling movie.
While it won’t be featured in this article, I’d highly recommend checking out Dean Alioto’s UFO Abduction/The McPherson Tape if you’re up for some ufology-inspired found footage thrills.
With that out of the way, onto the list!
6. The Arrival (1996)
Not to be confused with Denis Villeneuve’s Academy Award-winning Amy Adams vehicle about learning to communicate peacefully with extraterrestrial life, David Twohy’s The Arrival is a much more straightforward (but no less entertaining) genre romp where Charlie Sheen faces a global conspiracy involving hostile alien invaders.
It’s not exactly up there with Close Encounters or even Independence Day, but Twohy’s conspiratorial thriller plays out like an exceptionally fun episode of The X-Files that I’d recommend to sci-fi/horror fans who don’t mind a little bit of wonky CGI and 90s excess alongside their alien thrills.
5. Extraterrestrial (2014)
The Vicious Brothers made a name for themselves with the success of 2011’s Grave Encounters, but that was far from the Canadian duo’s only collaboration. And while it’s not exactly a fan favorite, I always point out 2014’s Extraterrestrial as one of their most underrated projects simply because I agree with the filmmakers’ opinion that there aren’t enough ‘cool alien abduction movies’ out there.
Admittedly, the majority of the picture functions like a run-of-the-mill creature feature with paper-thin characters and familiar horror tropes, but I’d argue that the cosmically-terrifying final act elevates the experience to new and memorable heights. The movie also boasts great performances by both Michael Ironside and Emily Perkins – a combination that more than makes up for the occasionally janky CGI.
4. Alien Raiders (2008)
Director Ben Rock has gone on record lamenting how his John-Carpenter-inspired creature feature was forcefully renamed from Supermarket to the painfully obvious Alien Raiders (a change which likely resulted in many potential viewers skipping out on the experience), but the new title doesn’t change the fact that this single-location thriller is something of a hidden gem.
Taking place entirely within a supermarket, Alien Raiders tells the story of an ensemble of customers and employees who are taken hostage by a group of armed men looking for something far more dangerous than an easy payout. I won’t get into details in order to avoid spoiling the experience, but I’d highly recommend this criminally underseen flick to fans of John Carpenter and the Resident Evil games.
3. Phoenix Forgotten (2017)
You’d think that a Ridley-Scott-produced retelling of one of the most infamous real-life UFO sightings of all time would have a bigger following, but I rarely see Justin Barber’s Found Footage period piece brought up during discussions about extraterrestrial-focused horror movies.
This is a huge shame, as Phoenix Forgotten is just as spooky as it is convincing, with this well-researched dive into the Phoenix Lights incident benefiting from surprisingly believable special effects as well as an appropriately horrific finale.
2. Communion (1989)
I wouldn’t blame you for disregarding Whitley Strieber’s controversial book about his alleged close encounter as sensationalist slop, but I’d argue that Phillipe Mora’s 1989 adaptation of these events is much better than the source material. After all, the movie works as a standalone piece of speculative fiction while also benefiting from an incredible performance by the one and only Christopher Walken!
Mora’s take on Communion may not be particularly scary, but the film is still an unforgettable character study regardless of whether or not the abduction really happened. Not only that, but the flick also paved the way for plenty of future sci-fi stories where the extraterrestrial invaders aren’t as evil as they initially appear.
1. Altered (2006)
Originally envisioned as a Sam Raimi-style horror-comedy titled Probed, Eduardo Sánchez (of The Blair Witch Project fame) eventually realized that it would be much more interesting to turn the film into a serious exploration of the emotional aftermath of a traumatic abduction incident.
That’s how we got Altered, a clever inversion of the standard abduction narrative that follows a group of troubled friends as they capture and experiment on an alien in order to enact revenge for their own abduction years prior.
You must be logged in to post a comment.