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Editorials

Halloween Drive-thru: Outrageous Fast Food Promotions

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I’m sure most Halloween-heads are fully aware of Burger King’s A1 Halloween Whopper from a couple years ago. It featured a sesame bun that was supposedly black in hue due to A1 sauce being baked right into the bread. However, widespread rumors of some who ate it experiencing dark-green colored stool for days after leads one to believe perhaps the bun was black from added colorings. Just a hunch. As unappetizing as it might have appeared, my horror/Halloween obsessed ass took myself to a local BK to try it out. As I pulled up to the drive-thru, in one of the windows I noticed the typical flat-gold crowns given out with every kiddie meal had been replaced. The new crowns were black, adorned with bones instead of paper gems and emblazoned in the center was the BK logo printed in blood red. It didn’t matter that I was a fully grown adult, I wanted one!

As I pulled up to the window to hand the young woman my money, I asked simply, “Can I get a crown?” Her eyes jumped a bit and then she practically leaned out the drive-thru window, scanning my car. She craned her neck searching…searching for a child or at least a car seat. There was none. Once I realized what she was doing, I responded “Oh, it’s not for me!” with an understanding chuckle. She seemed relieved as she smiled, handed me my change and my crown. It proudly sat atop my head as I pulled to the next window to receive my spooky Halloween meal. The burger? It was okay, and I thankfully avoided any toxic colored BMs.

In the pantheon of Halloween themed fast food gimmicks, the A1 burger isn’t really that special. There have been far more bizarre dishes, head scratching combinations, and some truly-simply adorbs treats from quick service chains across the world. In honor of these Franken-foods, lets bite into a list of some of the most wicked Halloween delectables.


Pizza

Some promos are just plain cute. This jack-o-lantern shaped pie has been available the past few years at take n’ bake pizza chain Papa Murphy’s. Usually these pepperoni-pumpkin plagiarists are made available the last week of October. No announcement has been made this year as to whether you’ll be able to pluck one up to throw in your own oven. 
Papa Murphy's Jack-o-lantern Pizza

A more frightening example of pizza promotion comes in the guise of the Black Halloween Pizza from Pizza Hut China. This limited time treat featured a crust made with cuttlefish powder, diced pumpkin topping, and a sweet mayo sauce to form the spider’s web. Of course, the actual spider is formed from leftover “cuttlefish powder” dough(?).

Pizza Hut Black Halloween Pizza


McDonald’s

Not to be outdone by the BK A1 burger, Mcdonald’s in Japan rolled out two specialty items, an “Orange and Black” burger and a ghostly white crab-meat sandwich. According to the site Brand Eating, both dishes are describes as follows:

“The Squid Ink Burger features black sesame buns, cheddar cheese, two beef patties, a black squid ink sauce, crispy fried onions, and an orange chipotle sauce….The Camembert Chicken Filet comes with white buns, a creamy white Camembert cheese sauce, lettuce, and a crispy chicken filet.”

McDonald's Black and Orange Burger

Yum. Naturally, they couldn’t miss out on the “everything pumpkin” craze as well. Enter choco-pumpkin fries. The name pretty much says it all. These are McDonald’s french fries covered in two sauces: chocolate drizzle and a pumpkin spice sauce. Even as a die hard “basic” who will inject pumpkin into everything (I’ve already handmade pumpkin ravioli and ice cream this season as well stocked up the ingredients for pumpkin chili), I don’t think I could get down with these fried slivers of potato product.

McDonald's Choco-Pumpkin Fries


Starbucks

No stranger to gimmicky promotions (looking at you Unicorn Frap), Starbucks has offered the Frappula Frappuccino for the past two years as a limited edition beverage. It’s really just white chocolate milk blended with ice and topped with some strawberry goo. While that certainly doesn’t scream Halloween, the presentation is bloody beautiful.Starbucks Frapula Frap

While this gory beverage might not be on the chalkboards this season, Starbucks Secret Menu breaks down just how simple it is to order this drink any time of year:

How to order (off season):

  • Mocha sauce on the bottom of cup
  • White chocolate sauce, milk and ice blended together
  • Finish with a drizzle of raspberry syrup and whipped cream on top

BONUS BEVERAGE: Fans of Harry Potter can bring one of the book’s more fantastical drinks to life – Pumpkin Juice! Simply order an Iced Apple Juice with Pumpkin Spice and sip away like your cruising on the Hogwart’s Express. Personally, I love driving a butternut squash through my juicer with an apple and a fresh piece of ginger. Ahh. Refreshing.


What’s your favorite fast food Halloween treat?

Editorials

Finding Faith and Violence in ‘The Book of Eli’ 14 Years Later

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Having grown up in a religious family, Christian movie night was something that happened a lot more often than I care to admit. However, back when I was a teenager, my parents showed up one night with an unusually cool-looking DVD of a movie that had been recommended to them by a church leader. Curious to see what new kind of evangelical propaganda my parents had rented this time, I proceeded to watch the film with them expecting a heavy-handed snoozefest.

To my surprise, I was a few minutes in when Denzel Washington proceeded to dismember a band of cannibal raiders when I realized that this was in fact a real movie. My mom was horrified by the flick’s extreme violence and dark subject matter, but I instantly became a fan of the Hughes Brothers’ faith-based 2010 thriller, The Book of Eli. And with the film’s atomic apocalypse having apparently taken place in 2024, I think this is the perfect time to dive into why this grim parable might also be entertaining for horror fans.

Originally penned by gaming journalist and The Walking Dead: The Game co-writer Gary Whitta, the spec script for The Book of Eli was already making waves back in 2007 when it appeared on the coveted Blacklist. It wasn’t long before Columbia and Warner Bros. snatched up the rights to the project, hiring From Hell directors Albert and Allen Hughes while also garnering attention from industry heavyweights like Denzel Washington and Gary Oldman.

After a series of revisions by Anthony Peckham meant to make the story more consumer-friendly, the picture was finally released in January of 2010, with the finished film following Denzel as a mysterious wanderer making his way across a post-apocalyptic America while protecting a sacred book. Along the way, he encounters a run-down settlement controlled by Bill Carnegie (Gary Oldman), a man desperate to get his hands on Eli’s book so he can motivate his underlings to expand his empire. Unwilling to let this power fall into the wrong hands, Eli embarks on a dangerous journey that will test the limits of his faith.


SO WHY IS IT WORTH WATCHING?

Judging by the film’s box-office success, mainstream audiences appear to have enjoyed the Hughes’ bleak vision of a future where everything went wrong, but critics were left divided by the flick’s trope-heavy narrative and unapologetic religious elements. And while I’ll be the first to admit that The Book of Eli isn’t particularly subtle or original, I appreciate the film’s earnest execution of familiar ideas.

For starters, I’d like to address the religious elephant in the room, as I understand the hesitation that some folks (myself included) might have about watching something that sounds like Christian propaganda. Faith does indeed play a huge part in the narrative here, but I’d argue that the film is more about the power of stories than a specific religion. The entire point of Oldman’s character is that he needs a unifying narrative that he can take advantage of in order to manipulate others, while Eli ultimately chooses to deliver his gift to a community of scholars. In fact, the movie even makes a point of placing the Bible in between equally culturally important books like the Torah and Quran, which I think is pretty poignant for a flick inspired by exploitation cinema.

Sure, the film has its fair share of logical inconsistencies (ranging from the extent of Eli’s Daredevil superpowers to his impossibly small Braille Bible), but I think the film more than makes up for these nitpicks with a genuine passion for classic post-apocalyptic cinema. Several critics accused the film of being a knockoff of superior productions, but I’d argue that both Whitta and the Hughes knowingly crafted a loving pastiche of genre influences like Mad Max and A Boy and His Dog.

Lastly, it’s no surprise that the cast here absolutely kicks ass. Denzel plays the title role of a stoic badass perfectly (going so far as to train with Bruce Lee’s protégée in order to perform his own stunts) while Oldman effortlessly assumes a surprisingly subdued yet incredibly intimidating persona. Even Mila Kunis is remarkably charming here, though I wish the script had taken the time to develop these secondary characters a little further. And hey, did I mention that Tom Waits is in this?


AND WHAT MAKES IT HORROR ADJACENT?

Denzel’s very first interaction with another human being in this movie results in a gory fight scene culminating in a face-off against a masked brute wielding a chainsaw (which he presumably uses to butcher travelers before eating them), so I think it’s safe to say that this dog-eat-dog vision of America will likely appeal to horror fans.

From diseased cannibals to hyper-violent motorcycle gangs roaming the wasteland, there’s plenty of disturbing R-rated material here – which is even more impressive when you remember that this story revolves around the bible. And while there are a few too many references to sexual assault for my taste, even if it does make sense in-universe, the flick does a great job of immersing you in this post-nuclear nightmare.

The excessively depressing color palette and obvious green screen effects may take some viewers out of the experience, but the beat-up and lived-in sets and costume design do their best to bring this dead world to life – which might just be the scariest part of the experience.

Ultimately, I believe your enjoyment of The Book of Eli will largely depend on how willing you are to overlook some ham-fisted biblical references in order to enjoy some brutal post-apocalyptic shenanigans. And while I can’t really blame folks who’d rather not deal with that, I think it would be a shame to miss out on a genuinely engaging thrill-ride because of one minor detail.

With that in mind, I’m incredibly curious to see what Whitta and the Hughes Brothers have planned for the upcoming prequel series starring John Boyega


There’s no understating the importance of a balanced media diet, and since bloody and disgusting entertainment isn’t exclusive to the horror genre, we’ve come up with Horror Adjacent – a recurring column where we recommend non-horror movies that horror fans might enjoy.

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