Editorials
Looking Back on the ‘Destroy All Humans!’ Video Game Franchise
During the height of the Cold War, Soviet spies weren’t the only foreign invaders America was worried about. After widely publicized incidents like the Kenneth Arnold UFO sighting and even the alleged Roswell crash, the already-paranoid country would be swept up in an extraterrestrial mania that would go on to shape a large part of North-American culture, with a huge impact on ’50s science-fiction in particular.
While there are countless movies and books about humans living in fear of little green men, it was only in the next millennia that a certain Matt Harding (yes, the same one from the viral Dancing Matt videos) thought about how cool it might be to experience the other side of a classic alien invasion story. Intrigued by the idea of a tongue-in-cheek open-world game where players would be narratively justified in killing everyone, the clever developers over at Pandemic Studios would soon birth one of the most ridiculously fun gaming franchises of all time.
The original Destroy All Humans! was released on home consoles back in 2005, becoming a hit with players and critics that were looking for a bit of humor alongside their open-world destruction. Often referred to as “Grand Theft Alien”, the game put players in the shoes of Cryptosporidium-137, a cloned member of the Furon race sent to Earth circa 1959 in order to recover a previous iteration of himself that had been captured by the US government. Along the way, “Crypto” engages in an atomic-age romp through middle America, fighting off police, army and even the secretive Majestic agency (inspired by the Illuminati-like Majestic 12, a group that conspiracy theorists claim to be some form of shadow government).
While demolishing buildings with death-rays and probing human nether regions is fun enough, the game wears its influences on its sleeve, making it doubly entertaining for horror/sci-fi fanatics. There are endless references to classic monster movies and cold-war media, with the Furons themselves being based on traditional grey alien descriptions. Crypto’s obnoxious co-hort Orthopox-13 is even voiced by none other than Richard Steven Horvitz, of Invader Zim fame, and don’t get me started on that familiar Mothership design.
The cheekily-named levels are also inspired by classic flicks like Teenagers From Outer Space and Attack of the 50-Foot Woman, with one mission even taking place at a Drive-In Theater as it plays Plan 9 From Outer Space (which is actually how I was introduced to Ed Wood’s masterpiece). In fact, you can even unlock the entirety of Teenagers From Outer Space for your viewing pleasure once you beat the game, which I always thought was a nice bonus.
Might as well watch the whole thing!
With a bonafide success on their hands, Pandemic Studios would produce a sequel the following year that improved on the original in nearly every way imaginable. While Destroy All Humans! 2 plays a lot like its predecessor, the addition of new powers, weapons, and a globe-trotting adventure that borrows heavily from James Bond and Kaiju films makes it one of the most entertaining experiences of the sixth console generation. Taking place in the Swinging Sixties, the satire here is on a whole other level. All it takes is a simple mind-scan to find copious amounts of jabs at ’60s culture while you’re out body-snatching your way through the US, England, Japan, and, eventually, even the Moon.
Levels were a lot bigger and more detailed as well, though it’s a shame that we lost the full-length unlockable B-Movies. The title also incorporated the Furon’s cloning technology into gameplay, as we were also offered a Split-Screen Cooperative mode that made this one of my most cherished gaming experiences on the PlayStation 2. I have many fond memories of getting together with friends to abduct unwitting humans while tractor-beaming tanks into the middle of the sea.
While this sequel was considered the high point of the series by most fans (myself included), it was way too big of a hit to not make another one. So, after a couple of years, with Pandemic Studios being bought out by EA, Locomotive Games would bring Destroy All Humans! Big Willy Unleashed over to the Wii in early 2008. Despite mixed reviews, it was actually a pretty entertaining game, with the story taking place in 1975 and focusing on Soylent Green styled fast-food conspiracy theories. Unfortunately, it didn’t add much to the formula other than clunky motion controls and the titular giant Willy robot. While many critics complained about the stale humor and setting, the fact is that the novelty of a foul-mouthed alien invader shoving probes up people’s butts was wearing thin, and it didn’t help that the original voice-actors weren’t available to reprise their iconic roles.
Big Willy Unleashed was more of a spin-off rather than a true sequel, but in late 2008/early 2009 (depending on the console), Sandblast Games would attempt to bring the franchise into high-definition for a whole new generation with Destroy All Humans! Path of the Furon. Boasting a late ’70s setting inspired by gritty grindhouse pictures and several gameplay tweaks (mostly involving a new melee combat system), the title had all the ingredients for a great game.
While Path of the Furon was mostly faithful to the franchise’s original formula, it wasn’t the next-gen experience that most gamers were hoping for. Sure, Sandblast managed to get the original voice-actors back, and some of the media satire was still on point, but the whole experience was marred by bugs, glitches and generally off-putting visuals. The game’s development was also reportedly a mess, with the North-American release of the PS3 version being canceled. Failing to make a profit, it seemed that this title spelled the end of the Destroy All Humans! series.
At least the Death-Ray is still fun!
For over 10 years, that was basically the truth. While there were always bubbling rumors of a new entry in the series, it was only in 2019 that THQ Nordic confirmed a fully-fledged remake of the first game by Black Forest Games, much to the excitement of long-time fans. Released about a month ago, the new and improved Destroy All Humans! keeps things as close to the original as possible, even using cleaned up restorations of the original audio. The focus here is more on visuals and minor quality-of-life improvements, though the team even went as far as restoring a lost mission that was cut from the original release.
With the game’s humor and memorable characters intact, I personally had a lot of fun with the title, though I understand why some critics think that the antiquated level design and adolescent jokes aren’t quite as entertaining in 2020 as they were 15 years ago. Luckily, the remake also brings back the unlockable B-Movies, which might inspire new players to check out that weird era of sci-fi movies. The new jetpack controls are also so well-designed that it might be hard to go back to the original game after getting used to them.
After such a faithful remake, fans have been left to wonder if Black Forest Games will also tackle Destroy All Humans! 2. While I think that what killed the original series was too many games in quick succession, which didn’t allow the franchise enough room to breathe, I’d love to see Black Forest’s take on globe-trotting co-op action. There haven’t been any official announcements so far, but the remake’s mostly-positive reception seems to suggest that a sequel would be a no-brainer. After that, we might even see a brand-new title allowing Crypto to terrorize some other decade.
In any case, these games introduced me to a whole new world of schlocky ’50s movies, so I’m glad that the franchise is making a comeback. Even if this year’s remake happens to be the last game in the series, I’m grateful that we’ve had so much fun over the years collecting brain stems and abducting innocent bystanders. For now, we can only hope that if Crypto does decide to terrorize a new decade, it won’t happen to be this one. We already have enough to deal with in 2020 without rampant anal probing.
College kids, strippers and vampires—those were Donald P. Borchers’ only requirements when he approached Richard Wenk about writing and directing a movie for New World Pictures. As requested, Wenk cooked up Vamp (1986), a tailor-made blend of the decade’s teen movie craze as well as its horror boom.
Grim and earnest stories were still very much a part of the ’80s horror landscape, yet Vamp is something of a comedy. One difference between it and, say, Saturday the 14th, though, is the former avoids using schtick. Wenk’s movie proves that horror comedies also don’t have to subtract thrills from their recipes. Of course, it takes a minute before reaching that point; college antics and culture shocks preface this one macabre misadventure.
Vamp‘s initial setup is apt for a typical college-set, sex-driven comedy; to bribe their way into a fraternity house, two pledges (Chris Makepeace, Robert Rusler) go looking for some adult entertainment. Without wasting time on any further exposition, the characters embark on an all-in-one-night trip that quickly detours into terror.
To procure their elusive MacGuffin—a stripper willing to gyrate for some frat boys—Keith (Makepeace) and AJ (Rusler), plus a third wheel named Duncan (Gedee Watanabe), trade the safety of their remote college campus for the seediness of some unnamed city. The setting is recognizably L.A. by day, but as soon as night falls, downtown, along with the characters, slips into a kind of surreal universe. Director of photography Elliot Davis gave this early entry on his prolific résumé an unusual yet distinctive look; that Mario Bava-esque, magenta-green lighting is omnipresent, so much so that it’s almost its own character.
Chris Makepeace and Robert Rusler in Vamp
The faint comparisons to Martin Scorsese’s After Hours are merited, although not just because of Vamp’s distinguishing nighttime aesthetic. Save for the primary characters, the supporting roles in Wenk’s movie are also quite colorful and transactional in their behavior. The difference here, though, is the additional urge to ruin Keith and his friends at every turn. Some of that harm is humorous and tolerable enough, whereas the moment Vamp dishes out its first fatality, it’s abundantly clear how this movie qualifies as horror.
Vamp falls into that category of horror movie that reveals its genre with a scream rather than a series of whispers. The opening scene can function as a hint of what lies ahead—things are not at all what they appear to be—but otherwise, Wenk is more than happy to hold off on the horror. When that time does come, though, it catches the viewer off guard. In addition to the pure shock value is that sudden decision to upend the movie’s foremost feature. Or so it would seem.
If afraid of major spoilage, those new to Vamp would be wise to stop reading here. There’s just no skirting around the fact that the central fellowship in this buddy movie hits a serious snag when AJ is killed. That development causes the story to become more of a “long, bad night” journey for Keith and his romantic interest. So while Wenk scores points for subverting expectations, there is also a touch of sadness in his decision. Because if Vamp does anything well, it’s making the characters likable.
Something that comes easily to Vamp—and other teen horror movies from this same era—is its ability to invent young characters worth caring about, or at the very least, are interesting and not so immediately off-putting. More impressive is how Wenk did all this without actually fleshing out those characters. Still and all, Keith and his kind are a grade above cookie-cutter, and in some cases, aren’t completely devoid of growth.
Grace Jones in Vamp
Vamp appeals with an assorted cast of characters. No two are the same, nor are they operating on the same wavelength. The cinematically extroverted AJ, whose actor conveyed charm and vulnerability in near equal amounts, comes alive when he’s at his most undead. Makepeace then makes the chronically cautious Keith a sympathetic fellow, even as he’s more and more affected by the night’s bizarre events. Meanwhile, Duncan is indeed the designated loser of the whole bunch, but Watanabe still manages to humanize him. As a bonus, the role didn’t require him to pull a Long Duk Dong.
As for Dedee Pfeiffer, she is plain adorable as the mysterious After Dark server nicknamed “Amaretto”. She spends all night fixing her dress strap while at the same time trying to get Keith to remember how he knows her. As their offbeat romance grows, it becomes another highlight of this movie. Whether or not Pfeiffer’s character is really a vampire also creates some welcome tension in the story.
Like a lot of its contemporaries, Vamp went on to become a bit of a cult classic. That current status is determined by several factors, but without a doubt, the casting of Grace Jones is the most considerable. The image of her writhing on that unique-looking chair, a Keith Haring original, springs to mind whenever this movie is brought up.
Chris Makepeace, Billy Drago and Paunita Nichols in Vamp
Prior to that first display of unequivocal horror, local vampire queen Katrina (Jones) took to the stage and delivered a strip show like no other. One would expect nothing less from that renowned model and performance artist. By now reports of Jones’ tardiness on set are no secret, yet it’s also hard to deny her commitment to the part of Katrina. It was, in fact, Jones who took charge of her character’s appearance—on top of Haring painting her body and that now-iconic chair, she had Andy Warhol handle her costuming. And not too many actors could seize a room’s attention without saying a single line of dialogue.
In 2022, Vamp received a retrospective novelization from Encyclopocalypse. This literary union of preexisting source material—Wenk’s original screenplay—and new ideas from author Christian Francis amounts to a more comprehensive visit to the After Dark Club. The basic story there is no different than what’s shown on screen; however, Francis gets creative with the characters’ origins and designs, and he enhances a number of key scenes.
The novelization expands on the urban and social decay of the main setting, and supplies a background for the After Dark Club. Sandy Baron’s character, Katrina’s emcee and familiar, is given ample motivation for sticking around; up until the fiery end, he is loyal to his friend and former business partner “Squeak”, who looks like he was “fed through a combine harvester, and left as nothing more than a heap of mangled remains”. Then there is Billy Drago’s character Snow, the leader of a street gang called The Dragons. His reason for menacing Keith and AJ is more altruistic than in the movie; he and his peers act tough to scare off any potential food for the vampires.
Lisa Lyon in Vamp
If not for all the backstories, Francis’ Vamp would be a hell of a lot shorter. Instead, this tie-in read dives into how AJ met Keith—the orphaned Anthony Joseph hailed from a broken home back in Brooklyn—and how their friendship flourished over the years. Keith’s archership is no longer just an assumed part of his entire being; it’s a confidence-building extracurricular for a boy who got picked on before coming into the protection of the new kid in town. These supplemental, in-depth looks at the protagonists, plus their close connection, are maybe unnecessary. The movie already did a fair and concise job of addressing their platonic intimacy without the need for flashbacks and insights, specifically in that scene where AJ lays it all out as he sacrifices himself.
Where the novelization gets off course is its approach to the minor characters. Intermittently backstorying the likes of Katrina’s indentured servants, Seko (Leila Hee Olsen) and Vlad (Brad Logan), ends up disturbing the flow of the writing. Was it absolutely essential that readers know Vlad was the Grand Duke of the House of Romanov, or how Snow’s accomplice Maven (Paunita Nichols) became so dentally challenged? No, not really. However, one’s mileage with these random biographies may vary.
The novelization is a more substantial experience, but for a movie like Vamp, less is more. And as plentiful as they are, it never simply coasts on its campy charms, either. The character work sits comfortably in that realm between cursory and meticulous, the script is sharper than first realized, and Greg Cannom’s vampire makeup is straightforward yet effective. Most of all, the movie didn’t squander its out-of-the-box concept. Richard Wenk made his vision of a “comic nightmare in which just about anything that can go wrong does” come true, and it is very enjoyable.
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