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5 Horror Main Characters We Shouldn’t Be Cheering For

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Movies are a great way to see certain characters and feel inspired to be more like them. We watch movies like Apollo 13 and want to have the leadership of Ed Harris’ Gene Kranz. We see Amelie and think that it’d be nice to do good things for other people for no other reason than to see them smile. Hell, when I watch “Hannibal”, I find myself wanting to be more like Dr. Lecter, in that he is well read, educated, urbane, charming, and elegant. Apart from his strange diet, he’s kinda admirable.

But there are also movies where the main character is an anti-hero, someone that we shouldn’t be cheering for because godDAMN are they an asshole! While I love many of these characters and want to cheer their survival, I also recognize that I shouldn’t approve of their behavior. After all, some of these people are flat out dicks.

So let’s look at a few of these characters that go about things in all the wrong ways!


THERE ARE SPOILERS AHEAD, SO VENTURE FORWARD AT YOUR OWN RISK!


Mary Mason – American Mary

Rape revenge movies aren’t a genre that I particularly enjoy. Honestly, I tend to avoid watching them simply because I find myself getting disgusted and I lose interest in the story. There’s a rape, the rape victim kills the rapist, usually through some horrible method, and that’s that. However, I didn’t know that American Mary was essentially a rape revenge film, so I went into it unaware of what was to come.

While I fully respect where she’s coming from – seriously, fuck that professor – the actions she took went beyond justice and dove right into the deep end of depravity and torture. Mary Mason is not a good person, plain and simple. Her death at the end of the film doesn’t bring satisfaction, it simply helps alleviate the sour taste in my mouth that built throughout the movie.


Snake Plissken – Escape From New York

Okay, hear me out here for a second before crucifying me, alright? Snake is pretty much the perfect example of an anti-hero. He was a decorated military man before turning to a life of crime, using his skills against the government. He’s also a surly prick who doesn’t give a damn about anyone but himself. Sorry, but it’s true and we all know it. People die left and right around Snake and he carries on because he has to save his own neck. Even at the end of Escape From New York, Plissken fucks over a summit that would’ve brought peace between the US, China, and the Soviet Union. It wouldn’t have really affected Snake in any way, shape, or form to allow the summit to carry on. He sabotaged it out of pure spite. What a dick.


Blade – The Blade Films

Blade is an interesting character because his heart is absolutely in the right place (he saves people left and right) but he’s an absolute asshole as a person. So, while he may do the right thing, he does it in a way that makes people go, “…thanks?

I get it. I really do. He’s pissed at vampires for what they did to him and his family. But you would think that after a certain amount of time that he’d learn how to cut loose and have a good time every once in a while. At least in a way that doesn’t involve slaughtering dozens of vampires at a time. Just give me one scene where Blade is not only genuinely grateful to those around him but also goes into his room and instead of meditating in front of his sword he puts on a record and maybe lights up a joint. Give me that and I’ll suddenly have so much more respect for the guy.


The Gecko Brothers – From Dusk Till Dawn

These guys are bank robbers and Richie is a rapist and murderer. Seth isn’t exactly the nicest of individuals either, happily waving his gun around and threatening the lives of pretty much everyone he comes into contact with. Just because Seth helps protect the Fullers doesn’t mean that he’s a good person. He’s still a scumbag who just happened to fall into a situation where he needs as many around him alive as possible so that they can last until morning. He evens says at the end, “I may be a bastard, but I’m not a fucking bastard“, as though that absolves him of his past.

The only person we should be cheering in this film is Tom Savini’s Sex Machine because he’s got a cock gun. End of story.


Ash Williams – Army of Darkness

I have a feeling this is the one where I get my ass handed to me…

Okay, so Ash in Evil Dead is totally fine. He’s a sweet guy who gets caught up in a horrible situation. Ash in Evil Dead 2 is a bit more of a jerk but he’s just a more revved up version of Evil Dead Ash. Army of Darkness and “Ash vs Evil Dead” Ash? Yeah, he’s a prick. He’s a total asshole and what’s even worse is that he knows it and embraces it! His bravado and machismo is there to protect only one person: himself.

Look, I realize that Ash has these great one-liners and Bruce Campbell plays the characters MAGNIFICENTLY! Hell, I love these movies and will happily watch them pretty much any day of the week. But that doesn’t change the fact that Ash is a total dick. I appreciate that he dispatches Deadites with total ease but does he have to be such a bottom-of-the-barrel kinda guy doing it?

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Editorials

Neon-Soaked Cult Classic ‘Vamp’ Starring Grace Jones Still Has Bite 40 Years Later

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Vamp 1986
Grace Jones and Dedee Pfeiffer in Vamp

College kids, strippers and vampires—those were Donald P. Borchers’ only requirements when he approached Richard Wenk about writing and directing a movie for New World Pictures. As requested, Wenk cooked up Vamp (1986), a tailor-made blend of the decade’s teen movie craze as well as its horror boom.

Grim and earnest stories were still very much a part of the ’80s horror landscape, yet Vamp is something of a comedy. One difference between it and, say, Saturday the 14th, though, is the former avoids using schtick. Wenk’s movie proves that horror comedies also don’t have to subtract thrills from their recipes. Of course, it takes a minute before reaching that point; college antics and culture shocks preface this one macabre misadventure.

Vamp‘s initial setup is apt for a typical college-set, sex-driven comedy; to bribe their way into a fraternity house, two pledges (Chris Makepeace, Robert Rusler) go looking for some adult entertainment. Without wasting time on any further exposition, the characters embark on an all-in-one-night trip that quickly detours into terror.

To procure their elusive MacGuffin—a stripper willing to gyrate for some frat boys—Keith (Makepeace) and AJ (Rusler), plus a third wheel named Duncan (Gedee Watanabe), trade the safety of their remote college campus for the seediness of some unnamed city. The setting is recognizably L.A. by day, but as soon as night falls, downtown, along with the characters, slips into a kind of surreal universe. Director of photography Elliot Davis gave this early entry on his prolific résumé an unusual yet distinctive look; that Mario Bava-esque, magenta-green lighting is omnipresent, so much so that it’s almost its own character. 

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Chris Makepeace and Robert Rusler in Vamp

The faint comparisons to Martin Scorsese’s After Hours are merited, although not just because of Vamp’s distinguishing nighttime aesthetic. Save for the primary characters, the supporting roles in Wenk’s movie are also quite colorful and transactional in their behavior. The difference here, though, is the additional urge to ruin Keith and his friends at every turn. Some of that harm is humorous and tolerable enough, whereas the moment Vamp dishes out its first fatality, it’s abundantly clear how this movie qualifies as horror.

Vamp falls into that category of horror movie that reveals its genre with a scream rather than a series of whispers. The opening scene can function as a hint of what lies ahead—things are not at all what they appear to be—but otherwise, Wenk is more than happy to hold off on the horror. When that time does come, though, it catches the viewer off guard. In addition to the pure shock value is that sudden decision to upend the movie’s foremost feature. Or so it would seem.

If afraid of major spoilage, those new to Vamp would be wise to stop reading here. There’s just no skirting around the fact that the central fellowship in this buddy movie hits a serious snag when AJ is killed. That development causes the story to become more of a “long, bad night” journey for Keith and his romantic interest. So while Wenk scores points for subverting expectations, there is also a touch of sadness in his decision. Because if Vamp does anything well, it’s making the characters likable.

Something that comes easily to Vamp—and other teen horror movies from this same era—is its ability to invent young characters worth caring about, or at the very least, are interesting and not so immediately off-putting. More impressive is how Wenk did all this without actually fleshing out those characters. Still and all, Keith and his kind are a grade above cookie-cutter, and in some cases, aren’t completely devoid of growth.

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Grace Jones in Vamp

Vamp appeals with an assorted cast of characters. No two are the same, nor are they operating on the same wavelength. The cinematically extroverted AJ, whose actor conveyed charm and vulnerability in near equal amounts, comes alive when he’s at his most undead. Makepeace then makes the chronically cautious Keith a sympathetic fellow, even as he’s more and more affected by the night’s bizarre events. Meanwhile, Duncan is indeed the designated loser of the whole bunch, but Watanabe still manages to humanize him. As a bonus, the role didn’t require him to pull a Long Duk Dong.

As for Dedee Pfeiffer, she is plain adorable as the mysterious After Dark server nicknamed “Amaretto”. She spends all night fixing her dress strap while at the same time trying to get Keith to remember how he knows her. As their offbeat romance grows, it becomes another highlight of this movie. Whether or not Pfeiffer’s character is really a vampire also creates some welcome tension in the story.

Like a lot of its contemporaries, Vamp went on to become a bit of a cult classic. That current status is determined by several factors, but without a doubt, the casting of Grace Jones is the most considerable. The image of her writhing on that unique-looking chair, a Keith Haring original, springs to mind whenever this movie is brought up.

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Chris Makepeace, Billy Drago and Paunita Nichols in Vamp

Prior to that first display of unequivocal horror, local vampire queen Katrina (Jones) took to the stage and delivered a strip show like no other. One would expect nothing less from that renowned model and performance artist. By now reports of Jones’ tardiness on set are no secret, yet it’s also hard to deny her commitment to the part of Katrina. It was, in fact, Jones who took charge of her character’s appearance—on top of Haring painting her body and that now-iconic chair, she had Andy Warhol handle her costuming. And not too many actors could seize a room’s attention without saying a single line of dialogue.

In 2022, Vamp received a retrospective novelization from Encyclopocalypse. This literary union of preexisting source material—Wenk’s original screenplay—and new ideas from author Christian Francis amounts to a more comprehensive visit to the After Dark Club. The basic story there is no different than what’s shown on screen; however, Francis gets creative with the characters’ origins and designs, and he enhances a number of key scenes.

The novelization expands on the urban and social decay of the main setting, and supplies a background for the After Dark Club. Sandy Baron’s character, Katrina’s emcee and familiar, is given ample motivation for sticking around; up until the fiery end, he is loyal to his friend and former business partnerSqueak, who looks like he wasfed through a combine harvester, and left as nothing more than a heap of mangled remains. Then there is Billy Drago’s character Snow, the leader of a street gang called The Dragons. His reason for menacing Keith and AJ is more altruistic than in the movie; he and his peers act tough to scare off any potential food for the vampires. 

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Lisa Lyon in Vamp

If not for all the backstories, Francis’ Vamp would be a hell of a lot shorter. Instead, this tie-in read dives into how AJ met Keith—the orphaned Anthony Joseph hailed from a broken home back in Brooklyn—and how their friendship flourished over the years. Keith’s archership is no longer just an assumed part of his entire being; it’s a confidence-building extracurricular for a boy who got picked on before coming into the protection of the new kid in town. These supplemental, in-depth looks at the protagonists, plus their close connection, are maybe unnecessary. The movie already did a fair and concise job of addressing their platonic intimacy without the need for flashbacks and insights, specifically in that scene where AJ lays it all out as he sacrifices himself.

Where the novelization gets off course is its approach to the minor characters. Intermittently backstorying the likes of Katrina’s indentured servants, Seko (Leila Hee Olsen) and Vlad (Brad Logan), ends up disturbing the flow of the writing. Was it absolutely essential that readers know Vlad was the Grand Duke of the House of Romanov, or how Snow’s accomplice Maven (Paunita Nichols) became so dentally challenged? No, not really. However, one’s mileage with these random biographies may vary.

The novelization is a more substantial experience, but for a movie like Vamp, less is more. And as plentiful as they are, it never simply coasts on its campy charms, either. The character work sits comfortably in that realm between cursory and meticulous, the script is sharper than first realized, and Greg Cannom’s vampire makeup is straightforward yet effective. Most of all, the movie didn’t squander its out-of-the-box concept. Richard Wenk made his vision of acomic nightmare in which just about anything that can go wrong doescome true, and it is very enjoyable.

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