Editorials
5 Brutal Foreign Horror Movies To Play At Christmas To Scare Your Family Away!
By: Remy Carreiro. The good news is, it’s Christmas time. Peace on Earth, goodwill towards men, and all that crap. The bad news is, this may be the first year you are holding the Christmas celebration at your house. You have already decided from decorating to all the cooking that is required, you never want to have to go through this again. So what do you do to ensure that Christmas is never again thrown at your place of residence? I have a rather simple solution, and it even incorporates the most disturbing horror movies ever made. Also, note this is not another movie list about all the classic Christmas horror movies (Black Christmas, Silent Night, Deadly Night). Put those on and most people would just laugh. No, these are the movies you put on and the people in the room flee in genuine terror and disgust. Honestly, is there a better way to introduce myself to the Bloody Disgusting readership than this? No, there really isn’t. These are five brutal, foreign horror movies you play at Christmas to scare your family away.
Quick excuse when family begins to freak out: Relax guys, it’s a Christmas movie.
Inside is a Christmas movie, but only in the sense that it takes place on Christmas eve. Outside of that, the Christmas theme is only set in place to make the whole experience feel more bleak and hopeless.
Inside is film from the French extreme movement about a pregnant woman who is home alone on Christmas eve and she gets a visitor. A woman claiming she broke down and needs help. Obviously you all know horror well enough to know that the woman may have some nefarious intentions. In this case, this stranger wants this woman’s unborn baby. I won’t spoil any reasons why, but trust me when I say, this is NOT a family film. Inside would remain on for about twenty minutes before everyone walks out.
Quick excuse when family freaks out: It is a movie about God and religion, and who’s birthday is it today?
Anyone who has seen this movie is laughing as they read this, trying to imagine how their grandmother and religious aunt (come on, we all have one) would react. Just keep telling your family it is an art-house movie. The reality is Martys is a move that you may initially think is about revenge, but the tone changes quickly. Many call Martyrs one of the most vile and upsetting horror films out there, but I also see it as one of the best.
A film about a fevered cult who think that girls can talk to God if they experience enough pain, Martyrs is ruthless and relentless in its brutality. The perfect movie to play when you want to scare your guests away and have them never come back. You would get about seven minutes into Martyrs before you found yourself, standing alone on Christmas.
Quick excuse when family freaks out: Listen, sometimes at Christmas we need to acknowledge the bad so we can truly be grateful for how lucky we are.
You knew there had to be a Gaspar Noe film on this list somewhere, right? Irreversible is the kind of movie that could totally ruin you if you sit down to watch it and know nothing about it. A big part of that is the rape scene that accentuates the middle of the story. Just think how well rape scenes go over at Christmas and you know why this is on the list.
The whole concept of this movie is that your life can pretty much change for the worse in a single day and there is little you can about it. The thing you also need to keep in mind about Irreversible is that it plays in reverse, and opens up with the ending. A harsh scene that you may need to watch again later to realize that it may have not played out like you thought it did. The long and the short is that Gasper Noe doesn’t really believe in happy endings, even when they happen at the beginning.
Seriously, play this movie at Christmas and your family may never look at you the same way. Consider yourself warned. Expect your family to leave about three minutes into this film.
Excuse when family begins to freak out: You know this director has won an Oscar, right?
Keep in mind, there is an American remake of this film by the same director, and it is shot-for-shot, so if you are burnt out on the subtitles by now, that is a viable option. I think of all the films you put on so far, this is the one that may keep people around the longest. Why? Because it feels almost like a slow-burn, and compared to the others on the list, there is NO blood at all. But Funny Games does something other horror movies don’t do. It holds the audience accountable. It looks at you and while doing horrible things, it asks: this is what you wanted, right? This is why you are watching, isn’t it? In those moment, it goes from being a film, to being a harrowing, gut-wrenching experience, all centered around one family and one family dynamic. Funny Games is one of those horror movies that is exhausting that, by the time it ends, you feel like you could sob.
In other words, a perfect family Christmas movie! You may actually get about thirty minutes or so into Funny Games before your family realizes these games aren’t very funny.
Excuse when family begins to freak out: Maybe on all days, it is Christmas when we need to realize how lucky we are, and how many injustices are going on in other countries that we don’t even know about.
Quick warning, depending on how far your family gets into this movie, they very well may disown you. I did a rather long write-up of Serbian Film and its many, um, virtues, over at my own site awhile back. I really, genuinely believe that this is the most disturbing movie ever made, and pushes the boundaries in horror that most would not even dare approach. But over time, I have understood more and more why this film was made. Yes, it is unforgivably brutal, but in the same breath, this stuff really goes on over in Serbia, and maybe we all need to know that. Or maybe we don’t, actually. But I digress, lest this turns into some political diatribe.
But I can say this with all confidence: this movie ruins people. Serbian Film is about a former porn star who takes one more job to make the money he needs to get his family out of Serbia, only to find out it is the sickest of all the snuff films ever made. Honestly, there are scenes in this film you would not show an enemy (newborn porn) so the act of showing it to your family could get you disowned. I am not kidding.
Yes, it is THAT hardcore. So bust out Serbian Film only in extreme emergency and if the other four films had no effect.
So while some families may gather around the table eating Christmas dinner and watching Christmas Story, take comfort in knowing your family will be rushing out of your house, gagging, from the movies you chose to put on. Hey look, I just saved your Christmas. You’re welcome. Sorry about the “your family hates you now” thing, but that will pass in time. I am living proof of that.
By the way, can’t believe I just wrote my first Bloody Disgusting article. You all have no idea how honored I am to be here. Thanks so much for reading, and please feel free to pop over to my site, and then hit me up on my Facebook page. This is beginning of a beautiful relationship. -Remy Carreiro
Having grown up in a religious family, Christian movie night was something that happened a lot more often than I care to admit. However, back when I was a teenager, my parents showed up one night with an unusually cool-looking DVD of a movie that had been recommended to them by a church leader. Curious to see what new kind of evangelical propaganda my parents had rented this time, I proceeded to watch the film with them expecting a heavy-handed snoozefest.
To my surprise, I was a few minutes in when Denzel Washington proceeded to dismember a band of cannibal raiders when I realized that this was in fact a real movie. My mom was horrified by the flick’s extreme violence and dark subject matter, but I instantly became a fan of the Hughes Brothers’ faith-based 2010 thriller, The Book of Eli. And with the film’s atomic apocalypse having apparently taken place in 2024, I think this is the perfect time to dive into why this grim parable might also be entertaining for horror fans.
Originally penned by gaming journalist and The Walking Dead: The Game co-writer Gary Whitta, the spec script for The Book of Eli was already making waves back in 2007 when it appeared on the coveted Blacklist. It wasn’t long before Columbia and Warner Bros. snatched up the rights to the project, hiring From Hell directors Albert and Allen Hughes while also garnering attention from industry heavyweights like Denzel Washington and Gary Oldman.
After a series of revisions by Anthony Peckham meant to make the story more consumer-friendly, the picture was finally released in January of 2010, with the finished film following Denzel as a mysterious wanderer making his way across a post-apocalyptic America while protecting a sacred book. Along the way, he encounters a run-down settlement controlled by Bill Carnegie (Gary Oldman), a man desperate to get his hands on Eli’s book so he can motivate his underlings to expand his empire. Unwilling to let this power fall into the wrong hands, Eli embarks on a dangerous journey that will test the limits of his faith.
SO WHY IS IT WORTH WATCHING?
Judging by the film’s box-office success, mainstream audiences appear to have enjoyed the Hughes’ bleak vision of a future where everything went wrong, but critics were left divided by the flick’s trope-heavy narrative and unapologetic religious elements. And while I’ll be the first to admit that The Book of Eli isn’t particularly subtle or original, I appreciate the film’s earnest execution of familiar ideas.
For starters, I’d like to address the religious elephant in the room, as I understand the hesitation that some folks (myself included) might have about watching something that sounds like Christian propaganda. Faith does indeed play a huge part in the narrative here, but I’d argue that the film is more about the power of stories than a specific religion. The entire point of Oldman’s character is that he needs a unifying narrative that he can take advantage of in order to manipulate others, while Eli ultimately chooses to deliver his gift to a community of scholars. In fact, the movie even makes a point of placing the Bible in between equally culturally important books like the Torah and Quran, which I think is pretty poignant for a flick inspired by exploitation cinema.
Sure, the film has its fair share of logical inconsistencies (ranging from the extent of Eli’s Daredevil superpowers to his impossibly small Braille Bible), but I think the film more than makes up for these nitpicks with a genuine passion for classic post-apocalyptic cinema. Several critics accused the film of being a knockoff of superior productions, but I’d argue that both Whitta and the Hughes knowingly crafted a loving pastiche of genre influences like Mad Max and A Boy and His Dog.
Lastly, it’s no surprise that the cast here absolutely kicks ass. Denzel plays the title role of a stoic badass perfectly (going so far as to train with Bruce Lee’s protégée in order to perform his own stunts) while Oldman effortlessly assumes a surprisingly subdued yet incredibly intimidating persona. Even Mila Kunis is remarkably charming here, though I wish the script had taken the time to develop these secondary characters a little further. And hey, did I mention that Tom Waits is in this?
AND WHAT MAKES IT HORROR ADJACENT?
Denzel’s very first interaction with another human being in this movie results in a gory fight scene culminating in a face-off against a masked brute wielding a chainsaw (which he presumably uses to butcher travelers before eating them), so I think it’s safe to say that this dog-eat-dog vision of America will likely appeal to horror fans.
From diseased cannibals to hyper-violent motorcycle gangs roaming the wasteland, there’s plenty of disturbing R-rated material here – which is even more impressive when you remember that this story revolves around the bible. And while there are a few too many references to sexual assault for my taste, even if it does make sense in-universe, the flick does a great job of immersing you in this post-nuclear nightmare.
The excessively depressing color palette and obvious green screen effects may take some viewers out of the experience, but the beat-up and lived-in sets and costume design do their best to bring this dead world to life – which might just be the scariest part of the experience.
Ultimately, I believe your enjoyment of The Book of Eli will largely depend on how willing you are to overlook some ham-fisted biblical references in order to enjoy some brutal post-apocalyptic shenanigans. And while I can’t really blame folks who’d rather not deal with that, I think it would be a shame to miss out on a genuinely engaging thrill-ride because of one minor detail.
With that in mind, I’m incredibly curious to see what Whitta and the Hughes Brothers have planned for the upcoming prequel series starring John Boyega…
There’s no understating the importance of a balanced media diet, and since bloody and disgusting entertainment isn’t exclusive to the horror genre, we’ve come up with Horror Adjacent – a recurring column where we recommend non-horror movies that horror fans might enjoy.
Looking for New Episodes of “Chucky” on Peacock? Here’s What Changed
‘Mountain Man’ – Joe Manganiello Will Battle Zombies in Upcoming Horror Movie
‘The Blair Witch Project’ – Original Stars Release a Statement Asking Lionsgate for Residuals & Recognition
‘Trap’ – Official Trailer Previews a Wild New Horror Experience from M. Night Shyamalan
‘The Exorcism’ – Russell Crowe Stars in Horror Movie Formerly Titled ‘The Georgetown Project’
You must be logged in to post a comment.