Movies
The Pentagon is Prepared for the Zombie Apocalypse
Worried the US government isn’t taking the undead menace seriously? Fear not, because it looks like they’ve weighed their options and have come prepared with a complex system that will almost definitely save us all. I’m also prepared, I just don’t have a codename for my plan, which largely consists of me sitting on the roof of the tallest nearby building with a couple bags of Cheetos so I can watch the world burn.
Their plan is called CONPLAN 8888, and looking over its sentences-long scheme for saving humanity — or at the very least, the politicians and wealthy folks who matter — it doesn’t sound terribly clever.
The strategy, known as “CONPLAN 8888,” is an unclassified document that lays out how the military would best respond to a potential zombie apocalypse. The plan’s overall purpose is for the military to undertake operations to “preserve ‘non-zombie’ humans from the threats posed by a zombie horde.”
CONPLAN 8888 follows a three-step approach to ensuring these goals by 1) maintaining a defensive perimeter to protect human life; 2) conducting operations that will eradicate zombie threats; and 3) aiding civil authorities in restoring law and order.
See how serious they’re taking the ever-looming threat of a zombie apocalypse? Someone at the Pentagon’s Defense Department took minutes out of their day to think up that strategy, and when the dead begin to rise it will be swiftly enforced and likely save 2’s and 3’s of people. Then those folks can thank the intern that carved three minutes out of his or her lunch break to compose it.
Okay, no, the Pentagon doesn’t believe something like this will ever happen.
CONPLAN 8888 is merely a training tool for aspiring military strategists. The zombie scenario was chosen because it’s safely based in fiction and wouldn’t cause any issues if it were leaked, whereas a plan codenamed Russia, for example, could potentially cause problems if leaked.
The killer tomatoes are back in Attack of the Killer Tomatoes: Organic Intelligence, and the offiical poster for the brand new movie has been unleashed tonight.
Additionally, we’ve learned that the film’s theatrical release is set for this August, with a panel set for San Diego Comic-Con this month featuring the world premiere of the trailer.
While you wait, check out the official poster down below.
Attack of the Killer Tomatoes: Organic Intelligence will be released in select cities across the US beginning August 7th in major cities such as Los Angeles, New York, Chicago, San Diego, and others, and expanding to further locations throughout the month.
The fifth installment in the horror-comedy franchise pits the eternal power of nature against AI’s best and brightest.
In Attack of the Killer Tomatoes: Organic Intelligence, a young biotech prodigy develops a revolutionary genetically engineered vegetable designed to solve humanity’s problems. But when the experiment spirals out of control, it unleashes a new generation of killer tomatoes, setting the stage for another outrageous chapter in the long-running cult franchise.
Attack of the Killer Tomatoes co-creators Costa Dillon and J. Stephen Peace return to write and executive produce. David Ferino directs.
The film features an ensemble cast led by franchise icon John Astin (The Addams Family), reprising his role as Professor Gangreen, comedy legend David Koechner (Anchorman), Academy Award nominee Eric Roberts (The Dark Knight), horror favorite Catherine Corcoran (Terrifier), comedy veteran Dan Bakkedahl (Veep), Myrna Velasco (Star Wars Resistance), Vernée Watson (Shrinking, Fresh Prince of Bel-Air), and Paul Bates (Coming to America).
Attack of the Killer Tomatoes launched in 1979, followed by 1988’s Return of the Killer Tomatoes, 1991’s Killer Tomatoes Strike Back, and 1992’s Killer Tomatoes Eat France.
The franchise also spawned an animated series in 1990.
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