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‘Thirteen Ghosts’ Has My All-Time Favorite Horror DVD Bonus Feature

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I love this movie. So much. We don’t talk about it enough.

The post-Scream early 2000s aren’t exactly considered to be a great time for the horror genre, but even at the worst of times in the genre’s history, there are still many gems to be found. One of those gems in that particular time period was the 2001 remake of Thirteen Ghosts, directed by Steve Beck and produced by Dark Castle Entertainment. At the time, the production company’s goal was to upgrade classic William Castle films for modern times, and Thirteen Ghosts came along just a couple years after House on Haunted Hill was given a fresh new coat of paint.

Okay, so Thirteen Ghosts is something of a hot mess, but goddamn is it a whole lot of fun. The film is primarily set in a glass house that contains a host of evil spirits, and it’s home to some of my personal favorite things: namely, a scenery-chewing performance from Matthew Lillard, incredible production design, gory kills, and some of the most creative ghosts in horror history.

Related: Ranking All of the Dark Castle Entertainment Horror Films

The remake took the basic framework of the 1960 original and went absolutely crazy with it, infusing the premise with over-the-top gore, nudity (ghost nudity, to be specific!), and the frenetic, music video-esque editing that plagued the horror genre at the time. The result? A monster mash with boundless energy and a sense of mindless fun missing from today’s horror films.

The standout highlight of the film is of course the ghosts themselves, which were created by KNB FX. The various monsters include a headless torso, a dude who looks like Pinhead on steroids, and a nude woman whose massive fake breasts gleefully dance up and down; they all look like Spirit Halloween decorations come to horrifying life, and I say that as a total compliment.

thirteen-ghosts

As cool as the monsters are, we never really learn much of anything about them… but that’s where the DVD comes into play and helps fill in the blanks. On the Thirteen Ghosts DVD (and also on the Blu-ray disc, which has to date only been released in a two-pack with the House of Wax remake) is a special feature titled “Ghost Files,” and it provides a wealth of information about the individual ghosts that never made its way into the film. Narrated by Cyrus Kriticos (F. Murray Abraham), the interactive feature takes you into Kriticos’ library and lets you control which characters you want to learn about by virtually selecting items on the shelves: each time you choose one, a short, minute-long video delving into the origin story of that ghost is played.

What makes the feature so awesome is that it adds so much to the movie, fleshing out the titular characters and building upon their mythologies. Those backstories are brought to life with concept art, and when you watch the videos, you realize the filmmakers put so much work into developing each of those characters. At only 90-minutes, the film just didn’t have time to dig deep.

Want to learn more about The Torso and friends? You can watch all of the videos below!

Writer in the horror community since 2008. Editor in Chief of Bloody Disgusting. Owns Eli Roth's prop corpse from Piranha 3D. Has two awesome cats. Still plays with toys.

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Editorials

Why Mainstream Horror Should Lighten Up

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“Elevated Horror.” Of all the combinations in the English language, that one is the most insufferable. 

It represents almost a decade of scary movies that, for the most part, took themselves too seriously. Horror responds to the moment, so its “why so serious” lean makes sense as we scuttle through the “worst of times” equation of Charles Dickens’ famous opening lines. But there’s still an opening and a need for a lighter approach; one that not only has fun with its audience but takes the piss out of a genre that is seemingly letting its newfound “respectability” go to its head. 

Wes Craven believed devotees see horror films to let out their fears one primal scream at a time. At their core, these movies are roller coasters; they bring us as close to the edge as possible before pulling us back into a safety net of reality. The need for a bigger and badder coaster increases during times when the size of that net decreases.

There’s a thrill that comes from imagining being in a foot race with a madman, or outthinking the hordes of zombies on the other side of the door, plus the scavenger humans coming behind them. There’s even a rush that comes from imagining how one might deal with possession to see good triumph over evil in the end. It’s all about building tension and releasing it through catharsis. That cathartic release usually sounds like screams followed by laughter, which signals relief. Genre heavy hitters over the past 10 years offered very little of that respite when the credits rolled. Films like Hereditary, The Witch, Talk to Me, and even Smile (pick one) keep that tension going after the screen fades to black.

Hereditary

As the genre became obsessed with creating trauma metaphors, that lack of release made sense. Anyone with even a small sample size of traumatic experiences knows those emotions don’t magically resolve themselves in an allotted run time. But how much trauma can one take? Especially when there’s a mess going on outside that few of us can escape from. Movies offer that off-ramp, no matter how short. 

Everything can’t be, nor should it be, “elevated.” Audiences need thoughtful explorations of life’s ills via monsters as much as they need murdering masked maniacs with kitchen knives. And no, it doesn’t have to go any deeper than that. Sometimes, a knife is just a knife, and it’s still worth our time and respect. As weird as it sounds, that simplicity is comforting not in spite of the trauma but because of it. 

The worst of times should manifest more than just anguish. People need to laugh just as much as they need to think seriously about this moment in time. Even the Scream franchise forgot the meta rock upon which it built its church when the latest foray sacrificed the subtle comedy for serious drama. Scary Movie returned at the perfect moment. It provides the necessary laughs, but it’s not a cure-all.

This isn’t a call for Scary Movie imitators but a return to a mainstream landscape where Killer Klowns from Outer Space sat with The Serpent and the Rainbow, nestled neatly with the latest Nightmare on Elm Street, which took nothing away from The Vanishing.

They Live

Even They Live, John Carpenter’s horror sci-fi satire sandwich, kept its tongue firmly in cheek while discussing serious ideas still relevant in 2026. Yes, a film about aliens taking over the world through subliminal messaging only visible through coded sunglasses is, in fact, a tad silly. Carpenter understood that mainstream horror can’t become so self-important that it never looks itself in the mirror and laughs at that inherent silliness. 

The thing is, horror historically excels at poking fun at itself. Most of the Scream franchise, The Cabin in the Woods, or The Blackening show adoration without kowtowing. They recognize tropes and trappings but invert them for an audience already in on the joke, but one that also finds solace in said conventions. This keeps the genre on its toes; once something gets parodied, it’s usually time to evolve. That breeds new ideas and fresh filmmakers, which not only strengthen the genre’s collective voice but also amplify it.

Get Out, as “elevated” as some critics want us to believe it is, is a cathartic, populist scary movie that spoke to an untapped audience rather than speaking down to them. Backrooms is one of the biggest horror hits in years, partially because it’s fine-tuned for modern-day teenagers instead of their parents. Movies like these tell everyone the genre is open for business; open for innovation and, yeah, open for new ways in which people can lovingly poke fun at with a wink and a nudge. 

Horror needs dread as much as it needs laughter.

Catharsis is just as important as tension, and pulpy populism has the same merit as more high-brow material. Respectability shouldn’t come at the expense of an experience akin to walking through a haunted house. At a time when joy seems in short supply, horror should look to its past to map out its future, and make things just a tad brighter for audiences.

Backrooms

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