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[Review] Blumhouse’s ‘Seven In Heaven’ is Perfect for the Young Horror Fan

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Blumhouse’s latest straight-to-Netflix film, Chris Eigeman’s Seven In Heaven puts a peculiar twist on the classic party game.

It follows Jude (Travis Tope), a somewhat nerdy and pompous high school student, as he attends a going away party for one of his friends. At the party, two bullies force the group to play a game: whoever gets the two matching redhead cards from their pinup model deck either has to make out for 3 minutes in front of the group or go into the closet together for 7 minutes. Naturally, Jude and one of the bullies, June (Haley Ramm), end up with the matching cards and opt for the closet. While in there, they are somehow transported to an alternate reality. In this new world, they find that the people they know are hyper-violent versions of themselves, and that Jude is wanted for murder. The two team up with their guidance counselor (Gary Cole) to find a way back to the real world before they are caught and killed.

Seven In Heaven plays like an elongated episode of “Goosebumps” for teenagers. It’s far-fetched and nonsensical, but still entertaining. One of the biggest logical leaps to overcome is that Jude’s friend Kent (Dylan Everett) is so quick to believe that the closet has anything to do with his disappearance. In reality, he would most likely draw the conclusion that his friend is playing a trick on him (in fairness, he does wonder this at first but very quickly jumps to inter-dimensionally traveling closet), get bored with the whole game, and go back to partying. However, the entire movie is outlandish enough that dwelling on this detail, or any details at all, seems silly. The film isn’t much interested in being logical, and understanding that fact makes for an easy viewing experience.

There are other, more significant issues, too. The film does a lot of telling but not very much showing. It asks the audience to fill in the blanks without giving them much reason to want to try. Rather than hammer home its ideas, Seven In Heaven assumes you’ll just go with it and ask your questions later. This is a bold move, especially for a film that doesn’t give viewers very much to hang their hats on. The acting is so-so, there really aren’t any effects to speak of, and many of the scenes seem to be the same thing over and over: Jude and June run into a group of angry people, their guidance counselor finds them and tells them to try getting back to the real world through the closet, it doesn’t work. Yet somehow, with the right viewers, connecting the dots won’t be much to ask at all.

With that in mind, it’s clear to see that Seven In Heaven is perfect for the early teenage crowd or for younger kids with an interest in getting into horror. It’s harmless, and has just enough suspense to deem it scary to younger viewers. Adults watching alongside them will likely find plenty to be frustrated about, but going in without expectations might make the experience more enjoyable.

Despite all its issues, Seven In Heaven is a solid film with a beginning, middle and ending – no more, no less. It’s certainly no masterpiece, but it holds the audience’s attention and tells a unique story, light on both horror and sci-fi. Seven In Heaven is fine, and sometimes that’s all a movie needs to be.

Dog dad, film lover, horror fan, and bookworm. Used to be 5% more punk than he is now. Please follow @DaxEbaben on twitter

Movies

SCREAMBOX Investigates UFOs and Extraterrestrials: Several Documentaries Streaming Right Now!

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As someone who is obsessed with UFOS (or more recently known as UAPs) and the concept of extraterrestrials, I love a good documentary. Sightings have been on the rise since the 1940s, with the atomic bomb seemingly acting as a catalyst for new visitors. But what are these UFOs/UAPs? Is there an explanation or are they simply beyond our explanation? Why are they here? Who are they? How much do our governments know? The questions are endless and so are the documentaries that attempt to uncover the secrets behind decades of sightings and alleged confrontations.

Whether you’re a seasoned viewer or new to the rabbit hole, there’s always a handful of interesting documentaries to get your neurons firing and leave you with sleepless nights. SCREAMBOX is investigating with the addition of several docs, all streaming now on the Bloody Disgusting-powered service. Here’s the breakdown:

Aliens (2021): Beam into this unidentified streaming documentary for a glimpse into Extraterrestrial life. Aliens are hypothetical life forms that may occur outside Earth or that did not originate on Earth.

Aliens Uncovered: Origins (2021): Before Area 51, hidden deep in the desert, the military discovered a hidden gem that helped them create Project Bluebook.

Aliens Uncovered: ET or Man-Made (2022): The crash of Roswell wasn’t meant for New Mexico. In 1947, a neighboring state had 3 major sightings that were swept under the rug.

Aliens Uncovered: The Golden Record (2023): In the late 70s, the US government launched a message to our distant neighbors.

Roswell (2021): This high-flying documentary examines the July 1947 crash of a United States Army Air Forces balloon at a ranch near Roswell, New Mexico. Theories claim the crash was actually that of a flying saucer, but what is the truth?

Also check out:

The British UFO Files (2004): Since the 1940’s the British Government has been investigating the Flying Saucer phenomenon. High-ranking military and government personnel, speak out for the first time, offering unique eyewitness accounts and inside information.

Alien Abductions and Paranormal Sightings (2016): Amazing Footage and stories from real people as they reveal their personal encounters of being abducted by Aliens.

And do not miss Hellier (2019): A crew of paranormal researchers find themselves in a dying coal town, where a series of strange coincidences lead them to a decades-old mystery.

These documentaries join SCREAMBOX’s growing library of unique horror content, including Onyx the Fortuitous and the Talisman of Souls, Here for Blood, Terrifier 2, RoboDoc: The Creation of RoboCop, Hollywood Dreams & Nightmares: The Robert Englund Story, The Outwaters, Living with Chucky, Project Wolf Hunting, and Pennywise: The Story of IT.

Start screaming now with SCREAMBOX on iOS, Android, Apple TV, Prime Video, Roku, YouTube TV, Samsung, Comcast, Cox, and Screambox.com.

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