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Dark Souls’ Limited Edition is Cool, Getting Your Name in its Credits is Even Cooler
I have two Dark Souls related things for you tonight. The first is a glimpse at the game’s Limited Edition, which as you can see below, includes an art book, snazzy case, behind the scenes featurettes, and a guide book. That last one might prove the most useful knowing how difficult the game is going to be (even more so than the very unforgiving Demon’s Souls). The second thing I have is a chance to get your name in the game’s credits.

To manage this you’ll have to show off your artistic capabilities and design up to three shields using the templates they provide on their Facebook contest page. While you’re there you should become a fan of the Dark Souls Facebook page and if you can get all this done by July 13th you’ll have a chance at getting immortalized in the credits. The three best designs from each shield template will be available as Dark Souls post-launch content, and just so you’re crystal clear in what it takes to win this, here are the rules in easy to read bullet form:
● Become a fan on the official Dark Souls Facebook page
● Download the blank shield templates
● Create up to three original masterpieces of heraldic design
● Submit your finished designs via Facebook on or before July 13th 2011
You’ll also be able to vote for the best design up until July 20th with the winners being revealed on the 28th. But is the opportunity to get your name in the credits all you get? Nope.
The designers of the top ten shields will get a copy of the game signed by Dark Souls game director Hidetaka Miyazaki.
If you’re looking for some motivation to get in on this steamy, shield designing action, remember this: if you do get your name in the credits it’s a guaranteed way into my pants. Seriously, it’s like an infinitely renewable sex coupon from yours truly.
News
‘Lockbox’ Review: An Underdeveloped Supernatural Mystery with Little Inside
Let’s start with the good news. Lockbox looks far better than its misleading marketing materials suggest, a supernatural horror movie so darkly lit and color graded that you’ll have to squint your way through jump scares. It’s also anchored by reliable genre performers. That’s also about where the good news ends with this rote adaptation of Knifepoint Horror Podcast story “Winthrop.”
The empathetic Carla Gugino gives her all as Ellen, a saint of a woman with boundless patience who takes on life’s hard luck with a kind smile. After giving up her career as a fashion designer to become caretaker for a dying mother, she’s then forced to reinvent herself once more when her caretaker role ends. That catches us up to the events of Lockbox, where Ellen is asked to take in a cousin she hasn’t seen in quite some time who’s dealing with severe PTSD.
Just as Ellen finally establishes a real connection with Winthrop (Lou Taylor Pucci), it’s interrupted by the arrival of peculiar neighbor Vahna (Katharine Isabelle), who spells clear trouble. When Vahna shows up dead, it sets in motion a supernatural battle of possession.

Image Credit: Aura entertainment
Director Daniel Stamm (The Last Exorcism, Prey for the Devil) and screenwriter Justin Yoffe approach Lockbox in the broadest of brushstrokes, dooming it from the start with clunky storytelling and woefully underdeveloped themes of heady topics like PTSD. Winthrop is a character that comes loaded with emotional baggage and trauma that’s piled on throughout his tragic life, but much like its title, his interiority and history are treated like a tightly guarded secret meant to prolong the supernatural mystery.
The problem here, though, is that Lockbox is too sparse to sustain mystery at all, and it instead robs Winthrop of characterization. It winds up trapping the talented Pucci without anywhere to go, toggling between wounded animal and mentally disoriented.
From there, Lockbox bounds through plot developments without any sense of stakes or purpose, peppered by a smattering of haphazard paint-by-numbers jump scares. The only unwavering constant is Ellen’s resolute faith, and Stamm seems to leave it entirely to Gugino to guide confused audiences through this inconsequential story right up until its supernatural climax.

Image Credit: Aura entertainment
To give more credit, Lockbox at least injects an unconventional exorcism here; just don’t expect much in the way of explanation. When the film finally reveals the meaning behind its title, it dangles a fascinating carrot it has zero interest in delivering. More than a severe lack of fleshing out its characters beyond plot drivers or devices, this faith-based flick also seems terrified to offer any worldbuilding whatsoever.
Yoffe’s script stretches the short story beyond its means instead of fleshing it out, and Stamm fills out the gaps with cheap CGI scares and overwrought performances; Isabelle’s Vahna is beyond cartoonish in her villainy. It’s also pretty nonsensical, treating only Ellen’s faith with the utmost sincerity and largely squandering its typically reliable talent. So much so that the final imagery, pure sunkissed saccharine sentimentality, leaves you with the feeling that this horror movie might be better suited as an entry in Chicken Soup for the Soul.
Lockbox releases in select theaters on July 3, 2026.

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