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12 Bloody Days of Christmas: Day 9 ‘Horror’s New Year’s Resolutions’

Weight loss. Quit smoking. Stop spending. Sounds familiar, right? With New Years Eve and the dawn of 2011 only about a week away, the year’s biggest, most burning question is probably hidden somewhere in the depths of your mind- what will be your New Year’s resolution? Looking over the past year in horror, it’s hard to imagine anyone NOT wanting to change something- whether it’s an ending, a release, or just a movie in general, horror, just like any genre, has had its share of ups and downs. So maybe this year’s burning question should be what is HORROR’S New Year’s Resolution? On the ninth day of Christmas, Bloody-Disgusting gave to me- “Horror’s New Year’s Resolutions”.

Day 1: Creepy Christmas Traditions
Day 2: Christmas Characters Gone Wrong
Day 3: Horrifying Holiday Decorations
Day 4: Twisted Yuletide Tales
Day 5: The Nightmare Before Christmas
Day 6: Creepy Christmas Movies
Day 7: Terrifying Toys
Day 8: Top 10 Potential Holiday Weapons
Day 9: Horror’s New Year’s Resolutions
Day 10: Top Picks for the New Year
Day 11: Ghosts of Christmas
Day 12: Happy Horror Holidays

Day 9: Horror’s New Year’s Resolutions
Between complete failures, the revolution of unrated horror, and the conclusion of the SAW franchise, horror had its fair share of ups and downs this past year. Going into 2011, I’m hoping and praying that the genre sees some inventive, gnarly and just plain amazing pieces enter the scene. That would be a nice change, right?

Here is a list of what I think the genre should take into consideration as a collective New Year’s resolution. Oh, the possibilities.

“I promise to show more of an interest in original work.”

Last year brought us another remake, or, as Hollywood likes to call it, a “re-imagination.” A Nightmare on Elm Street brought one of my favorite villains, Freddy Krueger, back to the big screen. I was stoked when I saw that this was coming out- until I realized it was doing two horrible things: 1. No Robert Englund and 2. It was taking the Friday the 13th remake route with a back story and little creativity. I still gave it a shot and, like many, was disappointed. I’d rather see original masterpieces from a new wave of horror.

“I will give 3D a rest.”

I saw nearly every horror/thriller/sci-fi film that came out this year. And, following the trend, a number of them were in 3D. While I thought Piranha was a fun movie, I really wasn’t that impressed with the graphics. Same goes for Saw- good movie, not so good visuals. While Resident Evil Afterlife didn’t tease my neurons as a whole, the 3D was decent- but then there was My Soul to Take. Not only was the flick a waste of my precious, horror movie going time, but the 3D might as well have been non-existent. The morale of the story- if you’re going to make a 3D movie, make it good.

“I will stop feeding into vampires.”

I’m like most living, breathing females my age: I’ve read the Twilight series. I’ve watched the movies. I’ve chosen sides in Team Edward v. Team Jacob. But there comes a time when there are TOO many vampires giving chase. While I love the Vampire Diaries and True Blood will forever be one of my favorite shows, not to mention the respect I hold for Let Me In, there were a lot of unnecessary blood suckers running around the world in 2010. The best, worst example is Vampires Suck- while Scary Movie back in the day was fun, is it really necessary to make another stupid movie about a set of movies that isn’t even done yet? I’m a tad bit overdosed on vampires. I’d rather see some werewolves.

“If I’m going to go unrated, I’m going to go all out.”

Hatchet 2 proclaimed to have started a revolution- AMC Theaters pushed to release the movie, under limited release of course, unrated to its audiences. But it was pulled after only three days (two in some areas). I Spit On Your Grave did the same thing- but underperformed at the box office. It’s not an easy battle fighting with the MPAA, but after seeing both of these movies- I just wish it had been something better, a movie that people would go and see time and time again. Classics, if you will. The key with unrated films is to make something people will go to- that’s when horror will change. Easier said than done, but a good thought for 2011 nonetheless.

“I understand some graphic novels DO NOT need to be made into movies.”

I’m not saying I don’t enjoy movies based on graphic novels- I’m saying I enjoy GOOD movies based on graphic novels. I liked 300. Sin City was pretty awesome. But Jonah Hex gave me reason to believe that Brian Austin Green married Megan Fox for her pretty face, not her acting abilities. Then again, Jennifer’s Body reminded me of that too. Here’s the thing- if you’re going to make a film based on a graphic novel, do it right. And don’t make a western.

There you have it- the question is, will anyone listen? Happy New Year guys!

Don’t forget to show your love for Andrea by visiting her blog: The Albin Way



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