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Your Guide To Horror On The Small Screen This October

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I don’t know about you but even if I own all of the movies they show on TV during October I still get pissed if I miss out on something. So I decided to make a working list we can all use in conjunction with DVR. Again, this is a WORKING list because the networks haven’t all come out with their full schedules yet. I picked the main networks to cover but if I am missing anything share it in the comments for everyone to see! Happy October!

AMC FEARFEST (Not A Full Schedule Yet)

Oct 17th:
9:00am – Graveyard Shift
11:00am – Silver Bullet
1:00pm – Thinner
3:00pm – Cujo
5:00pm – Dreamcatcher
8:00pm – Firestarter
10:30pm – Children of the Corn (1984)
Oct 18th:
12:30am – Riding the Bullet
4:00am – Cujo
6:00am – Children of the Corn (1984)
8:00am – Tremors
10:00am – Tremors 2: Aftershocks
12:15pm – Tremors 3: Back to Perfection
2:45pm – Tremors 4: The Legend Begins
5:15pm – Tremors
7:15pm – Tremors 2: Aftershocks
9:30pm – Tremors 3: Back to Perfection
Oct 19:
2:00am – Tremors 4: The Legend Begins
2:30am – Creation of the Humanoids
4:00am – Candyman: Farewell to the Flesh
6:00am – The Howling
8:00am – Pumpkinhead
10:00am – Child’s Play 2
12:00pm – Child’s Play 3
2:00pm – Bride of Chucky
4:00pm – Seed of Chucky
Oct 20
7:00am – Friday the 13th (1980)
9:00am – Friday the 13th, Part 2
11:00am – Friday the 13th – Part III
1:00pm – Friday the 13th: The Final Chapter
3:00pm – Friday the 13th (1980)
5:00pm – Friday the 13th, Part 2
7:00pm – Friday the 13th – Part III
9:00pm – Friday the 13th: The Final Chapter
11:00pm – Friday the 13th – A New Beginning
Oct 21:
1:00am – Friday the 13th, Part VI: Jason Lives
3:00am – War of the Colossal Beast
7:00am – Friday the 13th: The Final Chapter
9:00am – Friday the 13th – A New Beginning
11:00am – Friday the 13th, Part VI: Jason Lives
1:00pm – Friday the 13th Part VIII: Jason Takes Manhattan
3:15pm – Jason Goes to Hell: The Final Friday
5:15pm – Jason X
7:15pm – Friday the 13th (2009)
9:15pm – Friday the 13th (1980)
11:15pm – Friday the 13th, Part 2
Oct 22: 
1:15am – Friday the 13th – Part III
3:15am – Violent Midnight
3:30am – Corridors of Blood
3:45am – Invasion of the Neptune Men
7:00am – Slaughter of the Vampires
7:15am – Invasion of the Neptune Men
7:30am – How to Make a Monster
7:45am – The Funhouse
10:00am – Freddy’s Dead: The Final Nightmare
12:00pm – The Fog
2:00pm – Survival of the Dead
4:00pm – Land of the Dead
6:00pm – Lake Placid
8:00pm – House on Haunted Hill
10:00pm – Return to House on Haunted Hill
11:45pm – An American Werewolf in Paris
Oct 23:
2:00am – Puppet Master
7:00am – Eight Legged Freaks
9:30am – Lake Placid
11:30am – Cujo
1:30pm – I Know What You Did Last Summer
4:00pm – Thirteen Ghosts
6:00pm – A Nightmare on Elm Street (2010)
8:00pm – Ghost Ship
10:00pm – Scream
Oct 24:
12:30am – Deep Blue Seas
7:00am – Scream 3
9:30am – Ghost Ship
11:30am – Firestarter
2:00pm – The Omen (1976)
4:30pm – Damien: Omen II
7:00pm – Omen III: The Final Conflict
11:30pm – Hide and Seek
Oct 25:
4:00am – Graveyard Shift
6:00am – Christine
8:00am – Friday the 13th (2009)
10:00am – A Nightmare on Elm Street (2010)
12:00pm – Child’s Play 2
2:00pm – Child’ Play 3
4:00pm – Bride of Chucky
6:00pm – Seed of Chucky
8:00pm – Child’s Play 2
10:00pm – Child’s Play 3

Disney Channel Monstertober (For the little fans)

Oct 2:
8:00pm – “Dog With A Blog” “Howloween 2: The Final Reckoning”
8:25pm – “Mickey Mouse” Cartoon Short “The Boiler Room”
8:30pm – “Girl Meets World” “Girl Meets World: Of Terror”
9:00pm – “Jessie” “The Runaway Bride of Frankenstein”
Oct 3:
8:30am – “Jake and the Never Land Pirates” “Pirate Ghost Story”
9:00am – “Sofia the First” “Ghostly Gala”
9:30am – “Doc McStuffins” “Hide and Eek”
Oct 4:
8:00pm – “Phineas and Ferb” One-Hour Episode “Night of the Living Pharmacists”
9:00pm – “Gravity Falls” “Little Gift Shop of Horrors”
9:30pm – “Wander Over Yonder” “The Gift ll: The Giftening”
Oct 5:
8:00pm – “Austin & Ally” “Horror Stories & Halloween Scares”
8:30pm – “Liv and Maddie” “Helgaween-A-Rooney”
9:00pm – “I Didn’t Do It” “Next of Pumpkin”
Oct 10:
8:30 am – “Jake and the Never Land Pirates” “Jake the Wolf”
9:30pm – “Marvel’s Ultimate Spider-Man: Web-Warriors” “Halloween Night at the Museum”
Oct 13:
10:00 am-8:00pm – Marathon featuring encore presentations of Halloween-themed episodes and movies.
Oct 17:
9:00pm – “Evermoor” Special (Chapter 1 & 2)
Oct 24:
9:00pm – “Evermoor” Special (Chapter 3 & 4)
Oct 31
2:00pm-10:30pm – Marathon featuring encore presentations of Halloween-themed episodes and movies.

ABC FAMILY (For the whole family!)

Oct 19:
7:00am – Casper
9:00am – The Addams Family
11:00am – Addams Family Values
1:00pm – Harry Potter and the Deathly Hollows: Part 1
4:30pm – Harry Potter and the Deathly Hollows: Part 2
7:30pm – Disney·Pixar’s Toy Story OF TERROR!
8:00pm – Disney·Pixar’s Monsters, Inc.
10:30pm – The Nightmare Before Christmas
Oct 20:
6:30pm – The Nightmare Before Christmas
8:00pm – The Hunger Games
12:00am – The Haunted Mansion
Oct 21:
8:00pm – Pretty Little Liars” fan-appreciation special, “We Love You to DeAth”
9:00pm – Freak Out
Oct 22:
6:00pm – Beetlejuice
8:00pm – Melissa & Joey “Witch Came First”
8:30pm – Baby Daddy “Strip or Treat”
9:00pm – Freak Out
Oct 23: 
5:30pm – Freak Out
7:30pm – Corpse Bride
9:30pm – The Nightmare Before Christmas
12:00am – Teen Wolf
Oct 24: 
5:00pm – Corpse Bride
7:00pm – The Nightmare Before Christmas
8:30pm – Dark Shadows
12:00am – Beetlejuice
Oct 25:
7:30am – Batman
10:30am – Batman Returns
1:30pm – Beetlejuice
3:30pm – Dark Shadows
6:00pm – The Addams Family
8:00pm – Addams Family Values
10:00pm – Hocus Pocus
12:00am – Corpse Bride
Oct 26:
7:00am – Freak Out
8:00am – Coraline
10:00am – Scooby Doo 2: Monsters Unleashed
12:00pm – The Haunted Mansion
2:00pm – Corpse Bride
4:00pm – The Addams Family
6:00pm – Addams Family Values
8:00pm – Hocus Pocus
10:00pm – ParaNorman
Oct 27:
5:00pm – Freak Out
7:00pm – ParaNorman
9:00pm – Casper
12:00am – Scooby Doo 2: Monsters Unleashed
Oct 28:
5:00pm – Scooby Doo 2: Monsters Unleashed
7:00pm – Casper
9:00pm – Freak Out
12:00am – The Haunted Mansion
Oct 29:
5:00pm – The Haunted Mansion
7:00pm – The Addams Family
9:00pm – Addams Family Values
12:00am – ParaNorman
Oct 30:
4:30pm – The Addams Family
6:30pm – Addams Family Values
8:30pm – Dark Shadows
12:00am – Beetlejuice
Oct 31:
2:00pm – Poltergeist
4:30pm – Dark Shadows
7:00pm – Beetlejuice
9:00pm – Casper

TCM (Great old fashioned horror movies)

Oct 4:
12:00pm- The Mummy (1959)
3:00pm- Peeping Tom
Oct 10:
4:15am- The Ghost of Yotsuya
Oct 11:
12:00 pm- Curse of the Mummy’s Tomb
2:15 am- Blacula
4:00 am- Scream Blacula Scream
Oct 12:
8:00 pm- Shadow of a Doubt
Oct 13:
1:00 pm- Fingers at the Window
Oct 16:
8:00 pm- The Ghost Breakers
9:30 pm- The Old Dark House
11:15 pm- The Smiling Ghost
12:45 am- The Ghost Goes West
2:15 am- Ghost Chasers
3:30 am- Spook Busters
4:45 am- Gildersleeve’s Ghost
Oct 18:
12:00 pm- The Mummy’s Shroud
4:30 pm- The Spirit of the Beehive
Oct 22:
2:15 am- The Fog
Oct 23: 
6:00 am- Night of the Lepus
8:00 pm- The Innocents
10:00 pm- The Uninvited
12:00 am- The Woman in White
2:00 am- Night of Dark Shadows
4:00 am- The Others (2001)
Oct 25:
12:15 pm- Blood From the Mummy’s Tomb
2:00 pm- Sweeney Todd: The Demon Barber of Fleet Street (1982)
4:30 pm- Mad Love
5:45 pm- The Birds
8:00 pm- The Haunting (1963)
10:00 pm- Village of the Damned (1961)
11:30 pm- The Curse of Frankenstein
1:15 am- A Night At The Movies: The Horrors of Stephen King
Oct 26:
8:00 pm- Dr. Jekyl and Mr. Hyde (1941)
12:45 am- The Monster
2:15 am- Diabolique
4:15 am- Gaslight
Oct 28: 
6:00 am- Nosferatu (1922)
7:45 am- The Vampire Bat
9:00 am- Dead Men Walk
10:15 am- Isle of the Dead
11:45 am- The Return of the Vampire
1:00 pm- House of Dark Shadows
3:00 pm- Horror of Dracula
4:30 pm- Dracula, Prince of Darkness
6:15 pm- Dracula Has Risen From The Grave
8:00 pm- Dead of Night (1945)
10:00 pm- Twice-Told Tales
12:15 am- Kwaidan
3:00 am- The House The Dripped Blood
5:00 am- Torture Garden
Oct 29:
8:00 pm- Psycho (1960)
Oct 30: 
8:00 pm- House on Haunted Hill (1958)
9:30 pm- The Legend of Hell House (1973)
11:15 pm- 13 Ghosts (1960)
1:00 am- The Haunting (1963)
3:00 am- Burnt Offerings
Oct 31:
6:00 am- London After Midnight
7:00 am- Mark of the Vampire (1935)
8:15 am- The Devil-Doll
9:45 am- I Walked With a Zombie
11:00 am- Cat People (1942)
12:15 pm- The Tingler
1:45 pm- Spine Tingler! The William Castle Story
3:15 pm- Dementia 13
4:45 pm- Carnival of Souls
6:15 pm- Repulsion
8:00 pm- Night of the Living Dead
10:00 pm- Curse of the Demon
11:45 pm- House of Wax
1:30 am- Poltergeist
3:30 am- Strait Jacket
5:15 am- Eyes Without a Face

SyFy (In case you get desperate)

Oct 2: 

1:30 pm – Night Of The Demons
3:30 pm – Halloween II (2009)
6:00 pm – Freddy Vs. Jason

Oct 3:

12:00 pm – The Bleeding
2:00 pm – My Bloody Valentine
4:00 pm – Wrong Turn 5: Bloodlines
6:00 pm – Resident Evil: Extinction

Oct 4:

2:30 pm – Hellboy
5:00 pm – Resident Evil: Extinction
7:00 pm – The Reaping

11:00pm – Hellboy

Oct 5:

9:00 am – The Cursed
11:00 am – Stephen King’s Rose Red – Part 1
1:00 pm – Stephen King’s Rose Red – Part 2
3:00 pm – Stephen King’s Rose Red – Part 3
5:00 pm – The Reaping
9:00 pm – Shutter

Oct 6:

9:00am – Stephen King’s Rose Red – Part 1
11:00am – Stephen King’s Rose Red – Part 2
1:00pm – Stephen King’s Rose Red – Part 3
3:00pm – Psychosis
7:00pm – Shutter
11:00pm – My Soul To Take

Oct 7:

8:00am – My Soul To Take

Oct 9:

6:00pm – The Uninvited

Oct 10:

4:00pm – The Uninvited
6:00pm – Texas Chainsaw Massacre (1974)

Oct 11:

2:05am – Texas Chainsaw Massacre (1974)
2:30pm – Chernobyl Diaries
4:30pm – Halloween II (2009)
7:00pm – Freddy Vs. Jason
9:00pm – Texas Chainsaw Massacre (2003 remake)
11:00pm – Hostel: Part II

Oct 12: 

1:00am – Chernobyl Diaries
3:00am – The Bleeding
10:30am – Night of the Demons
12:00pm – Halloween II (2009)
3:00pm – Hostel: Part II
5:00pm – Freddy Vs. Jason
7:00pm – Texas Chainsaw Massacre (2003 remake)
9:00pm – The Fog

Oct 13:

1:00am – The Haunting in Connecticut
3:00am – Dead Like Me
11:00am – Dracula 2000
5:00pm – The Haunting in Connecticut
7:00pm – The Fog
9:00pm – The Wolfman
11:00pm – Freddy Vs. Jason

Oct 14:

10:00am – Freddy Vs. Jason

Oct 15:

2:00am – Hybrid

Oct 16:

5:30pm – Hellboy

Oct 17:

4:10am – War Wolves
9:30am – Dracula 2000
11:30am – Wes Craven Presents: Dracula II: Ascension
1:30pm – Hellboy
6:00pm – Drive Angry

Oct 18:

1:30am – Dracula 2000
3:30am – Wes Craven Presents: Dracula II: Ascension
9:00am – Stephen King’s Rose Red – Part 1
11:00am – Stephen King’s Rose Red – Part 2
1:00pm – Stephen King’s Rose Red – Part 3
3:00pm – The Reaping
5:00pm – The Fog
11:00pm – The Fog

Oct 19:

10:00am – The Uninvited
12:00pm – The Reaping
2:00pm – Let Me In
4:30pm – Cirque Du Freak: The Vampire’s Assistant
6:30pm – Birth
9:00pm – Lost Souls
11:00pm – The Revenant

Oct 20:

1:30am – Lost Souls
3:30am – The Uninvited
12:00pm – Birth
2:30pm – The Revenant
5:00pm – Hostel: Part II
7:00pm – Saw VII
9:00pm – Starve
11:0pm – Hellboy

Oct 22:

2:00am – My Bloody Valentine

Oct 23:

1:00am – Pulse
3:00am – Psychosis
8:00am – Pulse
10:00am – Haunting in Connecticut
12:00pm – Stephen King’s Rose Red – Part 1
2:00pm – Stephen King’s Rose Red – Part 2
4:00pm – Stephen King’s Rose Red – Part 3
6:00pm – Lost Souls

Oct 24:

12:10am – Lost Souls
2:10am – Haunting in Connecticut
4:10am – Wrong Turn 5: Bloodlines
9:30am – Wrong Turn 5: Bloodlines
11:30am – The Dead

Oct 25:

3:05am – Dead Season
9:00am – Dead Season
3:00pm – Texas Chainsaw Massacre (1974)
5:00pm – Texas Chainsaw Massacre (2003)
7:00pm – Battle of the Damned
9:00pm – Resident Evil: Extinction
11:00pm – Texas Chainsaw Massacre (2003)

Oct 26:

1:00am – Texas Chainsaw Massacre (1974)
10:30am – 30 Days of Night
1:00pm – 30 Days of Night: Dark Days
3:00pm – Battle of the Damned
5:00pm – The Reaping
7:00pm – Resident Evil: Extinction
9:00pm – The Happening
11:00pm – The Fog

Oct 27:

1:00am – 30 Days of Night
3:30am – 30 Days of Night: Dark Days
11:0am – The Cursed
3:00pm – The Reaping
5:00pm – The Fog
7:00pm – The Happening
9:00pm – The Crazies
11:00pm – Lost Souls

Oct 28:

1:00am – The Cursed

Oct 29:

2:00am – Wrong Turn 5: Bloodlines

Oct 30:

4:00pm – Texas Chainsaw Massacre (1974)
6:00pm – Texas Chainsaw Massacre (2003 remake)

Oct 31:

12:10am – Saw VII
2:10am – Hostel: Part II
11:00am – 30 Days of Night
1:30pm – Texas Chainsaw Massacre (1974)
3:30pm – Texas Chainsaw Massacre (2003 remake)
5:30pm – Halloween II (2009)
1:05am – Halloween II (2009)
3:35am – 30 Days of Night

Jess is a Northeast Ohio native who has loved all things horror and fringe since birth. She has a tendency to run at the mouth about it and decided writing was the only way not to scare everyone away. If you make a hobby into a career it becomes less creepy. Unless that hobby is collecting baby dolls. Nothing makes that less creepy.

Editorials

‘A Haunted House’ and the Death of the Horror Spoof Movie

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Due to a complex series of anthropological mishaps, the Wayans Brothers are a huge deal in Brazil. Around these parts, White Chicks is considered a national treasure by a lot of people, so it stands to reason that Brazilian audiences would continue to accompany the Wayans’ comedic output long after North America had stopped taking them seriously as comedic titans.

This is the only reason why I originally watched Michael Tiddes and Marlon Wayans’ 2013 horror spoof A Haunted House – appropriately known as “Paranormal Inactivity” in South America – despite having abandoned this kind of movie shortly after the excellent Scary Movie 3. However, to my complete and utter amazement, I found myself mostly enjoying this unhinged parody of Found Footage films almost as much as the iconic spoofs that spear-headed the genre during the 2000s. And with Paramount having recently announced a reboot of the Scary Movie franchise, I think this is the perfect time to revisit the divisive humor of A Haunted House and maybe figure out why this kind of film hasn’t been popular in a long time.

Before we had memes and internet personalities to make fun of movie tropes for free on the internet, parody movies had been entertaining audiences with meta-humor since the very dawn of cinema. And since the genre attracted large audiences without the need for a serious budget, it made sense for studios to encourage parodies of their own productions – which is precisely what happened with Miramax when they commissioned a parody of the Scream franchise, the original Scary Movie.

The unprecedented success of the spoof (especially overseas) led to a series of sequels, spin-offs and rip-offs that came along throughout the 2000s. While some of these were still quite funny (I have a soft spot for 2008’s Superhero Movie), they ended up flooding the market much like the Guitar Hero games that plagued video game stores during that same timeframe.

You could really confuse someone by editing this scene into Paranormal Activity.

Of course, that didn’t stop Tiddes and Marlon Wayans from wanting to make another spoof meant to lampoon a sub-genre that had been mostly overlooked by the Scary Movie series – namely the second wave of Found Footage films inspired by Paranormal Activity. Wayans actually had an easier time than usual funding the picture due to the project’s Found Footage presentation, with the format allowing for a lower budget without compromising box office appeal.

In the finished film, we’re presented with supposedly real footage recovered from the home of Malcom Johnson (Wayans). The recordings themselves depict a series of unexplainable events that begin to plague his home when Kisha Davis (Essence Atkins) decides to move in, with the couple slowly realizing that the difficulties of a shared life are no match for demonic shenanigans.

In practice, this means that viewers are subjected to a series of familiar scares subverted by wacky hijinks, with the flick featuring everything from a humorous recreation of the iconic fan-camera from Paranormal Activity 3 to bizarre dance numbers replacing Katy’s late-night trances from Oren Peli’s original movie.

Your enjoyment of these antics will obviously depend on how accepting you are of Wayans’ patented brand of crass comedy. From advanced potty humor to some exaggerated racial commentary – including a clever moment where Malcom actually attempts to move out of the titular haunted house because he’s not white enough to deal with the haunting – it’s not all that surprising that the flick wound up with a 10% rating on Rotten Tomatoes despite making a killing at the box office.

However, while this isn’t my preferred kind of humor, I think the inherent limitations of Found Footage ended up curtailing the usual excesses present in this kind of parody, with the filmmakers being forced to focus on character-based comedy and a smaller scale story. This is why I mostly appreciate the love-hate rapport between Kisha and Malcom even if it wouldn’t translate to a healthy relationship in real life.

Of course, the jokes themselves can also be pretty entertaining on their own, with cartoony gags like the ghost getting high with the protagonists (complete with smoke-filled invisible lungs) and a series of silly The Exorcist homages towards the end of the movie. The major issue here is that these legitimately funny and genre-specific jokes are often accompanied by repetitive attempts at low-brow humor that you could find in any other cheap comedy.

Not a good idea.

Not only are some of these painfully drawn out “jokes” incredibly unfunny, but they can also be remarkably offensive in some cases. There are some pretty insensitive allusions to sexual assault here, as well as a collection of secondary characters defined by negative racial stereotypes (even though I chuckled heartily when the Latina maid was revealed to have been faking her poor English the entire time).

Cinephiles often claim that increasingly sloppy writing led to audiences giving up on spoof movies, but the fact is that many of the more beloved examples of the genre contain some of the same issues as later films like A Haunted House – it’s just that we as an audience have (mostly) grown up and are now demanding more from our comedy. However, this isn’t the case everywhere, as – much like the Elves from Lord of the Rings – spoof movies never really died, they simply diminished.

A Haunted House made so much money that they immediately started working on a second one that released the following year (to even worse reviews), and the same team would later collaborate once again on yet another spoof, 50 Shades of Black. This kind of film clearly still exists and still makes a lot of money (especially here in Brazil), they just don’t have the same cultural impact that they used to in a pre-social-media-humor world.

At the end of the day, A Haunted House is no comedic masterpiece, failing to live up to the laugh-out-loud thrills of films like Scary Movie 3, but it’s also not the trainwreck that most critics made it out to be back in 2013. Comedy is extremely subjective, and while the raunchy humor behind this flick definitely isn’t for everyone, I still think that this satirical romp is mostly harmless fun that might entertain Found Footage fans that don’t take themselves too seriously.

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