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[BD Caption Contest] Win Another Zombie Head Limited Edition Of "The Walking Dead" Season 2 On Blu-ray!!

The First Prize winner this week is kizzle (please DM me your US mailing address to receive your Jaws Blu-ray and Bottle Opener).BD Caption kizzle 8 25 12 [BD Caption Contest] Win Another Zombie Head Limited Edition Of The Walking Dead Season 2 On Blu ray!!

This week we don’t have a mystery prize, instead we’re giving away “The Walking Dead” Season 2 on Blu-ray. It’s the limited edition with the Zombie Head that you can check out here. It has an SRP of $99.99. That means you guys really have to BRING IT this week! Runner-up gets Jaws on Blu-ray!

Head inside to see the runner-up and to start this week’s contest!
BD Caption trixxxster 8 25 12 [BD Caption Contest] Win Another Zombie Head Limited Edition Of The Walking Dead Season 2 On Blu ray!!

Our runner up is trixxxster. You also get a Jaws Blu-ray! DM Me! On to this week’s contest!

Rules:

1. We pick a still from a movie. You head to the comments section and submit your best one-liners, zingers, pathos riddled couplets etc…

2. You can enter as many times as you like and submit as many captions as you want, but each caption must be in a separate comment. Otherwise it will be too hard to tell where one caption ends and the other begins. Your entries can be posted anytime after the still is announced – just be sure to check that I haven’t announced that the contest is closed in the comments (you don’t want to submit your winning zinger after we’ve picked the winner). Also any racist, sexist, homophobic or generally hateful jokes will be disqualified. You don’t have to be insanely PC – just use your best judgement. Try and keep it brief! It has to fit on the photo now!

3. We pick the winner and announce them and their winning caption when the next photo in the contest is posted. We will address you by your BD Infected name. You can then DM me your US mailing address (no PO boxes) and I will send you your prize in a timely manner (i.e. you should have it in a couple of weeks). You must be a US resident to receive your prize!

Remember, First Prize receives The Limited Edition Zombie Head Walking Dead Blu-ray and Runner-Up receives Jaws on Blu-ray!
Maniac Cop Caption 8 25 12 [BD Caption Contest] Win Another Zombie Head Limited Edition Of The Walking Dead Season 2 On Blu ray!!

483 comments

  1. Avatar of Necro13

    I’m looking for a the Necronomicon, You havent by chance seen one lying around, have you?

  2. Avatar of cowtoon

    It’s looks like I’m going to jail. I think I’ll just clinch my butt cheeks now and try to remember to not drop the soap.

  3. Avatar of JukeLaw

    Don’t look at his hair. Don’t look at his hair. Don’t look at his hair.

    Shit.

  4. Avatar of LAPD

    OK Officer, this is it, I’m tired of getting the runaround. I really need to know….. Who’s hair looks more like ass, mine, or blondie’s here?????

  5. Avatar of horror_2.0

    Here is the address of my barber. You folks look like you could use him.

  6. Avatar of LAPD

    Excuse me, Officer, looking a ‘lil thin on top. Do you remember what it was like to have a wind tunnel tested hairdo????

  7. Avatar of LAPD

    Officer, her kickass hairdo matches her kickass personality. Scouts honor….

  8. Avatar of Elizabeth

    I know of this great place to get some hair extensions let me give you the number very little pain and you will have hair that looks as good as mine and hers but hers costs more

  9. Avatar of that.killa

    Officer, why don’t you just forget the ticket… and hail to the King, baby

  10. Avatar of VoicesCounselMe

    Really, Ron Jeremy? You’re gonna act like those times on the board aren’t the hours you’re screwing someone?

  11. Avatar of Necro13

    Excuse me Officer, have you heard about the remake of Evil Dead. By the way, this is a shameless promotion. I’m Bruce Campbell, and I approoved this message.

  12. Avatar of Necro13

    ok, here’s my last offer. You get he girl and I get your vote for President of USA. Deal?

  13. Avatar of od666666

    Excuse me officer, would you mind of I ran my fingers thru the amazing looking pubic hair on your head?

  14. Avatar of Necro13

    Yes, Campbell. Bruce Campbell. I can’t believe you’ve never heard of me…

  15. Avatar of Necro13

    I demand to know what the charges against me are…. Impersonating an actor.

  16. Avatar of Damien-Cole

    Hey man… how many doughnuts is it going to take for you to forget this whole situation here?

  17. Avatar of ShaggyPA

    Hello, we’d like a room. How much for the 1/2 Hour rate?…Psst, I’m Bruce Cambell

  18. Avatar of chewie2175

    this is the weirdest burger king ever, they all look like cops in here

  19. Avatar of BigPaul281

    Women: OMG! Look at his hairline, That is so disgusting!
    Bruce: Thank god I don’t look like that.
    Officer: I hope there not looking at my hair.

  20. Avatar of Trioxin83

    Here’s that number again officer, write this down….1-800-555-WIGSRUS

  21. Avatar of ShaggyPA

    No…no…NO!!! MY autograph….I asked if YOU wanted MY autograph. I’m Bruce Cambell DAMNIT!!!

  22. Avatar of AdamFearson

    I’m hear to kick butt, and catch a maniac cop…

    …and I’m all out of butt…

  23. Avatar of AdamFearson

    That’s right, sir, failure to hail to the king.

    Just put down: immediate execution.

  24. Avatar of chade

    Have you noticed I’m standing next to a mannequin.

  25. Avatar of Clean-Filth

    Man Behind Counter:
    So really your just going to wait till the man shows up?
    HE RAPED MY WIFE HERE!!
    Woman Behind Counter: What the hell dude.

  26. Avatar of Trioxin83

    Hey, buddy, will you listen to me please? A damn tree branch tried to rape my girlfriend here!

  27. Avatar of NRKee

    Officer,Im here to report a remake… remake? my notes say it’s a prequel.

  28. Avatar of Clean-Filth

    Man behind counter: Your a man you understand. A man has his needs! If you let us go, ill pay for you too.

  29. Avatar of Trioxin83

    Here you go officer, she didn’t shop smart, she didn’t shop S-Mart.

  30. Avatar of sabreson360

    Sir I already told you, we are closed on Thursdays and Fridays. Read the sign.

  31. Avatar of Clean-Filth

    So So So So So!
    Can can i ge.. get my sweet sweet crystal.
    You can have Ex here!

  32. Avatar of DeadManZombieFan

    OFFICER:YOU CAN HIDE THAT CHAINSAW ALL YOU WANT. BUT YOUR STILL UNDER ARREST FOR CARRYING A WEAPON.

  33. Avatar of sabreson360

    I saw him eyeballing my pencil. Good thing I tied it to this string just in case.

  34. Avatar of Clean-Filth

    Man behind counter:Shes up and ready, come on i need her out there!!
    Officer:Hold up, i need to recored the time you guys leave.

  35. Avatar of sabreson360

    I already told you sir I will be with you in 1/2 an hour. I just need to ask the lady here a few questions…in private.

  36. Avatar of sabreson360

    I told you to ring the bell if you need assistance.
    Once again officer, there is no bell!!

  37. Avatar of sabreson360

    Sir I already told you this is not a hotel. We do not have continental breakfast and you don’t want to eat the food here. Trust me…

  38. Avatar of sabreson360

    And that’s why you are just a security guard!
    Sir, I am a security OFFICER!!

  39. Avatar of sabreson360

    I already told you! He looked like the guy from Blue’s Clues! You keep drawing the guy from Weezer, that’s not the same guy!

  40. Avatar of Keegan Hill

    Colorful history, animated woods, spacious cellar, this cabin is a real steal!

  41. Avatar of WalkingDeadGuy

    Arrested for swimming naked?!? We were filming a scene for the remake of ‘Splash’!

  42. Avatar of brandxofttl

    So let me get this straight, Mr. Williams – you want to bring a THIRD girlfriend to this cabin in the woods?

  43. Avatar of tall-paul

    There is a maniac cop on the loose and your charging me with indecent exposure of a large chin?

  44. Avatar of ExpendableBlade

    Well hello Mister Fancypants. Well, I’ve got news for you pal, you ain’t Chief’ of but two things, right now: Jack and shit… and Jack left town.

  45. Avatar of Snakelow

    ok ladies, here is the adress where you can get the swedish made penis enlarger pump!

  46. Avatar of fuzmonkey007

    Do you have a description of the assailant that ruined this young ladies hair?

  47. Avatar of abelafonte

    Thats right officer, this woman said she was unimpressed with the size of my penis, but we both know she is a liar.

  48. Avatar of fuzmonkey007

    Here is the number for my wife’s beautician. I HIGHLY recommend you pay her a visit.

  49. Avatar of Trinity

    Hey guy,you know who I am?Right Bruce Campbell.I kicked the fucking zombies back in hell.Now you really want to tell me I need to pay my parking ticket?

  50. Avatar of Octofruit

    I told her it was just pillow talk baby, but she didn’t believe me

  51. Avatar of films94

    So it’s spelled B-O-S-E? And your sure I’ll look like Elvis?

  52. Avatar of Marcial.Jr

    Officer, she misunderstood when I said,
    Would you like to see my boomstick.

  53. Avatar of Patrick

    Officer, I’m telling you she didn’t cheat.
    She got pregnant from a 3D porno!

  54. Avatar of Mr. Darke

    Excuse me, have you seen my Congressional Medal of Honor around here?

  55. Avatar of Ashley Payne

    Half hour minimum you say? But what if I only need 10, no, still full price huh…

  56. Avatar of HardRocker

    I’m Bruce Campbell. Hey buddy I might not be Bruce Campbell but I did stay at a Holiday Inn last night.

  57. Avatar of HardRocker

    Come on give me a key to one of your cells, she’s gonna “audition” for me.

  58. Avatar of Mr. Darke

    Are you serious Dennis, you had to eat the black beans from craft services?

  59. Avatar of Rotten_Zombie_Props

    Ha yeah right, you found a book and an audiotape that brought demons to life and they attacked you while you were in a cabin for spring break. Kids these days.

  60. Avatar of HouroftheWolf

    Used or not sir, we don’t accept returns on sex dolls…I’m sorry Mr. Campbell.

  61. Avatar of CDevil

    Listen, screwhead, we’re short on time.

    Give me the room key, or out comes the boomstick!

  62. Avatar of docrock

    No really officer… all these little versions of me just all went into her vagina! So do we need to be concerned? Seriously…

  63. Avatar of Mr. Darke

    …and that, my liege, is how we know the Earth to be banana shaped.

  64. Avatar of Mr. Darke

    You must spank her well, and after you are done with her, you may deal with her as you like… and then… spank me.

  65. Avatar of CDevil

    Tell you what…

    Tear up the ticket, and she’ll give YOU some sugar too.

  66. Avatar of CDevil

    What do you MEAN I need to have her on a leash to walk her?

  67. Avatar of Rotten_Zombie_Props

    There is no way anyone would wanna watch a movie about kids in a cabin who find a book that makes demons come and attack them. It wont make a penny!

  68. Avatar of CDevil

    That’s what I said, officer.

    She broke my boomstick!

  69. Avatar of Mr. Darke

    I went to a restaurant that serves “breakfast at any time”. So I ordered French Toast during the Renaissance.

  70. Avatar of Mr. Darke

    Like math? We could add a bed, subtract our clothes, divide our legs, and multiply!

  71. Avatar of czerro

    Our glorious, wig-like, mantles of hair have shamed you, sir.

  72. Avatar of CDevil

    We were told Sarah Connor was here.

    Could we see her? PLEASE?

  73. Avatar of Mr. Darke

    Hello, my name is Bruce, you killed my Dada, prepare to die!

    Guard: Stop saying that!

  74. Avatar of czerro

    Look, I’m not particularly proud of it, but apparently our precinct operates out of a discount dry cleaner/barber shop according to the sign on the wall.

  75. Avatar of Mr. Darke

    We’ll never survive.
    Guard: Nonsense. You’re only saying that because no one ever has.

  76. Avatar of Mr. Darke

    Dennis, will you take my hand?
    Dennis the Guard: That would leave you with one!

  77. Avatar of czerro

    Look, Officer Librarian is it? We just wanna take a look at the Necronomicon for like 2 seconds.

  78. Avatar of Mr. Darke

    Guard:That’s some bad hat, Harry.
    Bruce:I’m not wearing a hat, that’s my hair.

  79. Avatar of Mr. Darke

    How do you make a blonde laugh on Monday?
    Tell her a joke on Friday?

  80. Avatar of jstalte

    I’m sorry officer. Let’s just pretend Spiderman 3 neeeeever happened.

  81. Avatar of Mr. Darke

    The assistant asked the blonde if she would like her pizza cut into six pieces or twelve.

    “Six please” she said, “I could never eat twelve!”

  82. Avatar of Mr. Darke

    I was going to be a cop, but I decided to finish high school instead.

  83. Avatar of Mr. Darke

    I thought you had to be in relatively good physical shape to be a police officer.

  84. Avatar of czerro

    Excuse me officer. Quit checking out my ‘boomstick’…my furrowed brow is UP HERE.

  85. Avatar of Mr. Darke

    Is it true that people become cops because they are too dumb to work at McDonalds?

  86. Avatar of czerro

    This is an intervention…I’ll let combat green telephone start.

  87. Avatar of czerro

    Seriously, missing/dead friends aside, ever think about squaring up some of that paperwork in your in box…?

  88. Avatar of BigBadQDaddy

    Let’s be reasonable here, Officer.
    1/2 hour allotted for conjugal visitation? For your best rate I can knock that in half! Oh yeah, and uh, Hail to the king baby!

  89. Avatar of BigBadQDaddy

    What if I told you that with a modest application of Bruce Campbell’s ‘Hail to the Cream’ revitalizing follicle accelerator you too could have an amazing head of golden crimp like my lovely assistant, Crimpyna?

    You do have a flex account, right?

  90. Avatar of spydr36

    (waves hand) This is not the prostitute you are looking for.

  91. Avatar of lv99ron

    Officer: So all you have to say is Klaatu Barada Nikto.
    Ash: Klaatu Barada N…Nippu…Neckburn…Nipple… It’s an “N” word, it’s definitely an “N” word!
    Officer: I’ll just write it down for you.

  92. Avatar of Patrick

    Officer, I said give me some sugar baby
    NOT, Here’s my number, so call me maybe.
    I’m innocent.

  93. Avatar of DeadManZombieFan

    Your arresting me for impersonating an officer in the dead next door? That guy wasn’t even me!

  94. Avatar of DeadManZombieFan

    The laughing deer head,flying demon book and evil tree are all real! let me go im not on drugs!

  95. Avatar of Thomas Zulli

    I told you. I dont know what happened. All I did was wish for my wife to be more like Barbie

  96. Avatar of Thomas Zulli

    Here is $10,000 cash, all you have to do is go to as many chat rooms and say you love my movies

  97. Avatar of Janice Heming

    Barbie over here says she’ll let you feel up her turtle neck if you can sneak us past the other guard!!!

    • Avatar of Sam Scarcello

      Version 2:

      “Officer are you gonna find the guy that did this to my wife’s hair, or not? She’s crimping my style.”

  98. Avatar of Adam Honsinger

    Hello Sir would you be interested in purchasing a time share? It’s a beautiful cabin in the woods!

  99. Avatar of Beezle2112

    Of course it was frightening! She looked at it and you can see what happened to her hair!

  100. Avatar of davidhicksiii

    So you see officer, crimpin’ ain’t easy…you’ve gotta keep your crimp iron strong.

  101. Avatar of Jack Ripple

    “These instructions I’m writing for you will help you get this girl to cook and clean for you. That, or you’ll end up as one of the Walking Dead.”

  102. Avatar of captainhair90123

    Did you realize your pencil is almost out of ink?
    If you don’t understand that then talk to the chin and fuck off…

  103. Avatar of captainhair90123

    Officer, you appear to have a cocaine snot hanging from your right nostril.
    Reminds me of Neil Young in The Last Waltz.

  104. Avatar of davidhicksiii

    It was a maniac, MANIAC at my door…
    and he was dancing like he’s never danced before.

  105. Avatar of theghost1984

    So you’re saying that we’re looking for a guy with a bigger chin than yours? I find that had to believe.

  106. Avatar of heavenle_sin

    I told her to give me some sugar..
    Next thing I know Im back at her place crimping her hair!!

  107. Avatar of Conquistador

    C’mon, can’t you let us off with a warning? We didn’t know crappy sequels were illegal!

  108. Avatar of Conquistador

    I don’t care who you are buddy, our rooms are all booked because the Evil Dead convention’s in town!

  109. Avatar of marshallvv

    Officer someone tried to burn my lady friend’s hair..

    Now why would they do that.

  110. Avatar of marshallvv

    So you’re saying…

    Someone tried to run over your lady friend, because of her hair?

  111. Avatar of Lou
    Lou

    Wait! Not so fast….spell ‘Propecia’

  112. Avatar of Skull-And-Crossbones

    Theresa: Look us in the eyes and tell us we’re lying.

    Cop: What’s a 5 letter word the term “fuck off”?

  113. Avatar of bonerghost

    Now when you get there, knock 3 times, and recite these words….Klaatu, Verata, Nnnnnnnickle.

  114. Avatar of Ronster

    Tethered pencil eh? ..the crime rate must be up in your town, huh, Officer?

  115. Avatar of Ronster

    I’m you number one fan, Bruce! Here’s my address..come by my house tonight and I’ll show you my stuff.

  116. Avatar of swonx13

    Well yes, yes I was on Hercules and I was also on Xena, are you a fan? “NO”

  117. Avatar of DeadManZombieFan

    the only way your going to keep me from getting the Limited Edition Walking Dead blu-ray is by locking me in here!

  118. Avatar of DeadManZombieFan

    ok we’ll let you voice a cop car if there’s ever a cars 3 just let us out of here please officer.

  119. Avatar of mav07

    Cop: “One Necronomicon, Cursed.

    One unused prophylactic, One soiled.

    Sign here.”

  120. Avatar of swonx13

    First she wanted to kill me and now she wants to kiss me and i would like to file a complaint.

  121. Avatar of Conquistador

    I’ll explain it one more time… the first ten minutes were a remake and THEN the sequel starts

  122. Avatar of Conquistador

    Can you check one more time, please?

    For the last time, you’re not on Mr. Raimi’s guest list!

  123. Avatar of Conquistador

    I’m sorry, sir, but I don’t think I can arrest Sam Raimi for giving you that part in Spider-Man 3

  124. Avatar of Conquistador

    Alright, you two are all checked in for the “Washed-up B-Movie Stars” support group

  125. Avatar of Conquistador

    No, there must be some mistake, people wouldn’t leave comments like that… my fans LOVE me!

  126. Avatar of Wolf-man

    If you let us go, I’ll give a part in Bruce Campbell vs Frakenstein.

  127. Avatar of Raze55

    And then I said listen here buddy nobody fucks my sister except me!

  128. Avatar of Raze55

    Yeah I snuck this bitch off the set of the manequin sequel…I’ll only need a half hour.

  129. Avatar of chewie2175

    so here is what i need your handcuffs, the interrogation room, and batman!!

  130. Avatar of ghengis

    Sorry Officer, I didn’t know it was illegal to show her my boom-stick.

  131. Avatar of
    Slacker2387

    Yes, I was in THE EVIL DEAD…Can we move on?

  132. Avatar of
    Slacker2387

    If you look close enough…You can see the face of Jesus.

  133. Avatar of SuperKilla

    That’s right, keep writing an there’s a nice,shiny doughnut in it for ya.

  134. Avatar of sanglant

    Mr. Campbell, I regret to inform you that The Adventures of Brisco County, Jr has been cancelled.

  135. Avatar of kpp88

    Where was your boomstick stolen again. I already told ya SMART S-MART.

  136. Avatar of Archgoat

    Look, maybe I didn’t say every single little tiny syllable… Oh wait, wrong movie.

  137. Avatar of thalazy

    “You are right sir, her tit’s are missing. I’ll get on it right away.”

  138. Avatar of Conquistador

    I’m bringing her in on charges of “Impersonating the Russian chick from Rocky 4″

  139. Avatar of Conquistador

    Sure, I’ll look at your screenplay, but first can we deal with the Maniac Cop?!

  140. Avatar of Conquistador

    Maniac cop, good one Jack! Next you’ll be telling me about Deadites and Spider-Men!

  141. Avatar of Conquistador

    So you’re just going to sit there and let it keep ringing? You’re quite the cop.

  142. Avatar of MaxTorque

    Okay, so you didn’t like “Shelley the Airhead”. My next buddy is a Woozle, and his name’s Peanut!

  143. Avatar of TEDDYX

    I wonder how long it will take before he smells my fart….

  144. Avatar of Retrovertigostudios

    “We’d like to file a missing person report. 6’1″, blonde hair, blue eyes, anatomically incorrect.”

  145. Avatar of Retrovertigostudios

    “We’d like to file a missing person report. Male. 6’1″, blonde hair, blue eyes, anatomically incorrect.”

  146. Avatar of Retrovertigostudios

    “So…. a Blonde and Bruce Campbell walk up to a security guard…..” “Oh, you’ve heard this one !?!”

  147. Avatar of signal84

    she just keeps getting out of the basement , what do you want me to tell ya

  148. Avatar of FPJ666

    Cop: You don’t look like Tom Atkins?
    Bruce: No, that’s because he was thrown out a window within the first 30 minutes. I’m the new star.

  149. Avatar of Whorror

    So then I said if you don’t like B movies you can get the hell out

  150. Avatar of Trixxxster

    Officer, I swear she’s my girlfriend! Can we forget that whole solicitation business?

  151. Avatar of Whorror

    It’s no wonder you guys didn’t get my phone call, How old is that damn thing?!

  152. Avatar of Evan3

    “That’s right officer… Ive got a license to chin”

  153. Avatar of Evan3

    “OK, I’ll bail out the Coen brothers … for the offense of “Crimewave”"

  154. Avatar of evenscarier

    Listen, Bub, I don’t care if you were only in there 5 minutes, you still pay the half-hour minimum….

  155. Avatar of lv99ron

    Ash: BAZINGA!
    Officer: Here, let me write down a few catchphrases for you, so you never have to use that again.

  156. Avatar of Michael Trimble

    Ok,so let me get this straight. You picked her up,had sex with her, and your mad because she’s a man?

  157. Avatar of Mbed

    Damn it, Raimi… You know I hate acting in your conjugal visit fantasies…

  158. Avatar of Mbed

    Gimme 5 minutes with sequel-thievin’, court-date-skippin’ Glenn Macrae… “Consequences” indeed.

  159. Avatar of Ronster

    Officer, I should be the one to give you my autograph, instead?

  160. Avatar of Ronster

    Bruce Campbell, you have the right to go and purchase me a box of assorted doughnuts, and here’s the address to doughnut king.

  161. Avatar of russellg79

    Officer, can you please explain to her the difference between “legitimate” rape and date rape.

  162. Avatar of russellg79

    The suspect was wearing a black apron and had a blow dryer in one hand and a flat iron in the other.

  163. Avatar of russellg79

    Bruce Campbell welcomes the first female into the “Members Only” club.

  164. Avatar of swonx13

    wanna touch my boomstick officer, the she-bitch won’t do it!

  165. Avatar of swonx13

    I don’t want any jailhouse blues but would you like to touch my blue suede shoes!

  166. Avatar of swonx13

    I’m Bruce Campbell and she won’t even have sex with me!

  167. Avatar of swonx13

    Is that a boomstick in your pocket or are you just happy to see me?

  168. Avatar of blackiesson73

    Hey officer,when i said would you like a autograph i meant MY autograph not yours !!!!

  169. Avatar of RCandy

    …and so you’re just trying to reunite her with her lost mannequin family.
    Got it.

  170. Avatar of Grim-Ocelot

    Look officer…this is a three way staring contest. So you’re gonna have to look up.

  171. Avatar of Beanis

    Calm down ma’am, I put an APB out on the “Crimping Bandit”.

  172. Avatar of Beanis

    I promise, you’ll both make it to the second sequel.

  173. Avatar of Beanis

    I’m sorry, the fashion police does ticket for hair too.

  174. Avatar of Beanis

    Officer, it’s a crime what the Deadites did to her hair.

  175. Avatar of danielhegarty

    I got some bad news Bruce… This is the film you get more then five minutes screen time in.

    • Avatar of danielhegarty

      I got some bad news Bruce… This is the last film you get more then five minutes screen time in.

  176. Avatar of xRAPExAPEx

    Yes officer….it’s bound in human flesh and inked in blood. Should be easy to recover.

  177. Avatar of Conquistador

    I just don’t know if I like that color.

    Look officer, we’re running out of wigs to show you!

  178. Avatar of Conquistador

    So we’re not even big enough stars to audition for “Dancing With The Stars”?!

  179. Avatar of Conquistador

    Sorry pal, you’re a supporting character in a horror movie… you won’t make it to the third act

  180. Avatar of Conquistador

    You know your shoelace is untied. Don’t believe me? Well it’s worked before

  181. Avatar of Conquistador

    Aww, chin up officer. She says “not in a million years fatso” to lots of guys!

  182. Avatar of Conquistador

    Why won’t you write it?!

    Because “Bruce Campbell” is NOT a 4-letter synonym for famous actor!

  183. Avatar of Conquistador

    C’mon pal, quit stalling and pick…

    Alright, I guess I’ll take 5 boxes of the thin mints.

  184. Avatar of Conquistador

    So you’ve NEVER heard of me?

    Yeah, Bruce Campbell… from “the Rocketeer”, right?

  185. Avatar of hardwey

    Excuse me, I need to find the closest Old Navy before midnight!
    So far this has cost me nothing- I would like to keep it that way!

  186. Avatar of Conquistador

    So it’s really official?

    Yes sir, you and your giant Barbie are legally married.

  187. Avatar of BigBadQDaddy

    “Wait, are you trying to tell me, Bruce F-ing Campbell, that Sam Raimi is going to make more money that me? AND from some god damned ‘Spider Man’ movies?! What was that? He is going to cast me as a door man? Stick to your day job, Mr. Fancy Pants!”

  188. Avatar of signal84

    security officer: let me guess bill compton and sookie stackhouse hahaha wheres your buddy eric

  189. Avatar of Joey_Redballs

    Cliff, I told you to screen these groupies! Her hair is crimped and clearly unacceptable.

  190. Avatar of Joey_Redballs

    We paid good money for that vibrator, and I’m not about to let the TSA take it away!

  191. Avatar of Joey_Redballs

    Look officer, we both know she’s over 18. I just tell people she’s 16 so I can do more business.

  192. Avatar of joseph23

    We are here for 1) post bail for Michael Westen; how much of a discount will I get for this blonde? and 2) file a report for a missing/stolen book “Necronomicon”; do you take those here or do you have the number for ghost busters?

  193. Avatar of JimboBruno

    That awkward moment when you realize that not being recognized while you’re signing in at the security desk for the remake of your own movie

    is still better than being stuck on Burn Notice.

  194. Avatar of Joey_Redballs

    You’re going tear up my wife’s parking tickets, or I’m gonna shove this phone up your ass.

  195. Avatar of Joey_Redballs

    How the hell was I supposed to know this Russian hussy was a minor? Obviously she’s got a lot of city miles.

  196. Avatar of Joey_Redballs

    C’mon give us a break. We’re both navy men. No dice? My name? Chuck. Chuck Finley.

  197. Avatar of SuperKilla

    See, she doesn’t even blink. You can’t even tell I’m giving her the bowling ball grip.

  198. Avatar of Joey_Redballs

    We’re here to visit her mother, Henrietta. She’s the she-bitch in room 1408.

  199. Avatar of Joey_Redballs

    I’m with the fashion police. I’m writing your wife a citation for crimped hair.

  200. Avatar of Joey_Redballs

    Visiting hours prohibit 3-ways and all nature of orgy. No exceptions, Mr. Campbell.

  201. Avatar of Joey_Redballs

    Hello, would you please explain to my husband that he cannot have me committed for being a “crazy bitch”?

  202. Avatar of Joey_Redballs

    Can the hospital just please take her in for a few days until this PMS blows over?

  203. Avatar of Joey_Redballs

    I’m with the fashion police. This citation is for your wife’s crimped hair and aqua turtleneck. I’m going to let the jacket slide.

  204. Avatar of Joey_Redballs

    So Tina forgot to take her meds and blew some kid in the Food Court. So what? It happens.

  205. Avatar of Joey_Redballs

    How were we supposed to know you can’t have sex in the dressing room? Show me a sign that says that.

  206. Avatar of Joey_Redballs

    Loss Prevention…I caught her smuggling feminine hygiene products. Phew! She really needs them.

  207. Avatar of Lou
    Lou

    Look at me! While I undress you with my eyes.

  208. Avatar of Ultrazilla

    I promise you officer, she’s NOT a mermaid! You’ve got the wrong movie!

  209. Avatar of Janice Heming

    Excuse me, sir, can you tell us on what floor are they holding the Suzanne Somers lookalike contest???

  210. Avatar of John_Doe

    So… you’re telling me it was a tree that attacked your wife?

  211. Avatar of gir
    gir

    Now Bruce, are you sure we need an Evil Dead remake?

  212. Avatar of Janice Heming

    Honey, I told you before that Fatty over here isn’t interested in joining your Jazzercise class!

  213. Avatar of EvanDickson

    Alright guys, contest is closed! Thanks! Winner will be announced tomorrow!

  214. Avatar of KC
    KC

    I’d like to have her shaved and deloused. If I’m not back by 3 just leave her tied to the dumpster out back.

  215. Avatar of brent

    Excuse me officer…

    I’m here to bail out Sam Raimi

  216. Avatar of shooting_duck

    “The killer’s face is HUGE and shovel-esque! Think my chin… only smaller!”

  217. Avatar of ZombiesAteMyNeighbors

    “Let me get this straight officer…it’s my fault an axe murderer snuck into my backseat because I didn’t lock the car doors?”

  218. Avatar of KCinSt.Pete

    He was about 5’ 10″, heavy set. Double chin, balding…with…an alarmingly…frizzy comb-over…

  219. Avatar of
    deandean1990

    What do you mean you will only help us if I show you my tits?!

  220. Avatar of
    deandean1990

    No, I wasn’t in Splash the movie, I was Anna Nicole Smiths body double in “Country Plowin’.

  221. Avatar of
    deandean1990

    Honey, my pubes are kinked too, did you want to see?

  222. Avatar of myers78

    Bruce ) Officer quickly, this woman needs your help !

    officer) Sorry Bruce theres nothing I can do she needs the fashion Police.

  223. Avatar of worldwarzac

    You can be serious?!? I end up starring in a TNT show called Burn Notice???

  224. Avatar of wellsworld

    Let’s see if you will take a seat the masked man with the knife in jail cell be will be able to assist you momentarily. Would you like shampoo along with your trim?

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