Editorials
10 Ridiculously Expensive Horror-Themed Toys
It’s not just children who like to play with toys! Big horror franchises still have toys being released today and they’re not always cheap. Below are some of the most expensive horror-themed toys on the market today (and by market I mean Amazon). Would you buy any of these?
Alien ($599.99)
I included this life-size xenomorph egg and facehugger replica on my Black Friday Chopping List, but I just can’t get over that $600 price tag. Don’t get me wrong, I would love the Hell out of this if I got it as a gift, but there is no way I’m spending $600 on it.
Beetlejuice ($119.95)
Apparently this little bastard gave me nightmares as a kid, so out of morbid curiosity I’ve always wanted to get one. That $120 price tag gives me pause though. This was probably about $100 less expensive when it came out in 1989!
Child’s Play ($488.99)
The Chucky and Tiffany dolls used to always be on sale at Hot Topic in the late 90s and early 2000s, and they were probably somewhat affordable. This guy, at nearly $500, takes the cake in terms of a cash grab. He’s not even a great replica of the Chucky doll! The facial expression is way off and at 15″ tall he’s a bit too short. Personally, one that looks like this would be ideal. That would be worth $500 if only because Chucky’s scream-face is so hilarious.
Evil Dead 2 ($327.63)
This book does look pretty cool, but you can just get the DVD of the film in that super awesome Necronomicon packaging for half the price.
The Exorcist ($360.00)
The price of this “toy” is slightly justified by its height. At 5′ tall, she’s like a demon version of one of those Life-Size Barbie Dolls from the 90s. The product description does list it at the “best prop ever,” and how can you say no to something with that sort of marketing? At $360, it’s a total steal!
Friday the 13th ($426.76)
The price for this bad boy undoubtedly comes from the fact that it’s a NECA Convention Exclusive Toy, but other than putting it on display, could you really justify the price tag on this one? Mrs. Voorhees and Jason do look really cool though.
Jaws ($289.95)
I won’t lie, I would dish out the money for this one. It even comes with a little Quint to put in the shark’s mouth! I’m not sure if you could play with it in the bathtub, but I’d certainly try. It just looks so cool!
The Munsters ($249.95)
Now you can have the whole family of Munsters (in black and white!) for the reasonable price of $249.95. In all seriousness though, these look fantastic and for collector’s items, they’re competitively priced.
A Nightmare on Elm Street ($312.00)
Something about this plush Freddy Krueger doll just looks so cute. It’s reminiscent of the marionette Freddy from A Nightmare on Elm Street 3, but just slightly less creepy. Wouldn’t you love to tuck your child in with this little guy? Only $312!
Scream ($116.98)
Finally, we’ve got a simple, yet classy Ghostface action figure, complete with knife and extra long sleeves!
I realize most of this post has been in jest, but I’m just not one to spend more than $20 on toys and action figures. For all of the toy collectors out there, what are your thoughts on these? Are they reasonably priced for what they are? Or is someone taking us for a ride? Let me know in the comments below or shoot me a Tweet!
Editorials
Not Another ‘Scary Movie’: Revisiting Forgotten Parody ‘Shriek If You Know What I Did Last Friday the 13th’
After Scream (1996) made a killing at the box office, as well as won over critics and audiences, a lot of folks in the movie biz thought they could do the same thing (and yield similar results). That thing, of course, being a slasher. Most of these opportunists wound up being pretty straightforward; they were low on humor or commentary. Yet others, like Scary Movie (2000), saw the potential for spoofing Scream, and acted on that impulse with both haste and excitement.
A few months after the Wayans’ comedy first hit theaters, Shriek If You Know What I Did Last Friday the 13th landed on the USA Network, as part of the channel’s “Shriek Week” programming. That straight-to-cable (then home video) destination is possibly why many people still don’t know about this one. Or they simply chose to forget. Whatever the reason, only one of these two horror parodies came out on top—and it’s certainly not the movie where Coolio channeled Prince, and Tom Arnold saved the day.
Shriek If You Know What I Did Last Friday the 13th previously went by the name of I Know What You Screamed Last Semester. That Trimark acquisition then settled on a wordier title, just so it could avoid the litigious wrath of Miramax Films. Folks may or may not remember that Columbia Pictures was sued over the “implied connection” between I Know What You Did Last Summer (1997) and Scream. So, yeah, there was no way that this competing Scream parody wasn’t going to be kept on a tight rein.
A Heavy Reliance on Late ’90s TV References

Simon Rex, Julie Benz, Majandra Delfino, Harley Cross, Danny Strong, Tom Arnold and Tiffani-Amber Thiesen in Shriek If You Know What I Did Last Friday the 13th.
Naturally, there would be similarities between Shriek If You Know What I Did Last Friday the 13th and Scary Movie—their scripts are built on the backs of the same two movies. It goes without saying that the other big slasher of the 1990s, I Know What You Did Last Summer, was as much of a target as Scream. However,the film pads itself with more TV references than Scary Movie did.
Half the cast coming off of (and in some cases, returning to) a WB show could be a reason why. Dawson’s Creek is particularly zeroed in on, based on how there’s a central character named “Dawson Deery“, and how the teen drama’s teacher-student affair plotline is satirized to the nth degree. As if there weren’t enough nods to television, Baywatch, VH1’s Pop Up Video, and even those cheesy Mentos commercials all serve as joke prompts.
Shriek director John Blanchard and writers Sue Bailey and Joe Nelms all hailed from television, so it’s understandable that they would stick close to home. The movie’s humor in general makes more sense, in light of learning that Blanchard worked on SCTV, Kids in the Hall, and MADtv. The writers, on the other hand, were each fairly green, with Bailey being the most experienced of the two; she wrote and produced the game show BattleBots. Nevertheless, they, plus Blanchard, churned out a passable, joke-a-minute movie. The whole thing is staggeringly of its time, but no one here was aiming for longevity.
Having seen enough of these kinds of movies, we know to expect jokes of the low-hanging fruit variety. That’s the parody’s whole prime directive. From the characters having names like “Screw Frombehind” and “Doughy Primesuspect”, to stereotyping that feels taboo nowadays, this is a movie from a different era of comedy. Its coarse, corny, and unapologetic sense of humor won’t sit well with everyone in these more enlightened times. In which case, Shriek If You Know What I Did Last Friday the 13th can be treated as a time capsule.
Does Shriek If You Know What I Did Last Friday the 13th Humor Still Hold Up Today?

“You may already be a victim”—Someone receives a most peculiar threatening piece of mail in Shriek If You Know What I Did Last Friday the 13th.
Although Shriek doesn’t live up to its own claims of being so funny that you’ll die of laughter, its bawdier parts could still lead to some nervous laughter. For instance, after this movie’s parallel to Drew Barrymore’s Scream character is done in—not by the killer but by a bug zapper—the movie throws a newspaper next to the victim’s fresh corpse. The headline? “Popular slut killed! Football team mourns”.
We then move on to the wacky and inappropriate goings-on at Bulimia Falls High School, home of the Hurlers. At this nexus of constant absurdity, indecency, and surrealism, students are seen fornicating on the lawn, cheerleading squad applicants are advised to be comfortable with partial nudity, and terrorists openly prepare for an anthrax attack. It can be a tad jarring to watch, especially if you didn’t grow up witnessing this style of comedy firsthand. Hell, even if you did, you may still have a “what the hell were they thinking?” reaction.
It’s not just the aggressively edgy humor here that can make you chuckle—the slapstick, the sight gags, and the ribaldry all have a decent chance of landing. The movie’s own villain, whose hockey mask was instantly transformed into a crudely Ghostface-esque one after coming in contact with an open flame, commits more cheap laughs than kills. His and his victims’ chase sequences, most of which are cartoonish in nature, left this writer grinning. The Scooby-Doo fan in me also totally ate up that clever unmasking joke.
Final Thoughts on This Forgotten Horror Parody

Shriek If You Know What Did Last Friday the 13th
Now, the jury is still out on whether these comedies are to blame for the death of the first slasher revival. There is more to consider than some parodies. At the very least, the likes of Scary Movie didn’t exactly encourage big studios to put their money on a trend that was being derided to death (and not as profitable as the spoofs). These sorts of movies also felt unnecessary at the time, given how their principal inspiration is already a deconstruction of the genre. But like anything else that quickly becomes popular, mockery is unavoidable.
Shriek If You Know What I Did Last Friday the 13th is indeed a movie nobody asked for, much less needed. As a sample of pre-millennium humor and cultural attitudes, it’s not always precise. But as I’ve laid out, your mileage may vary. Horror parodies typically don’t have the best track record, so managing one’s own expectations here is recommended.
Upon rewatching, I for one laughed a bit more than I did back then. Only this time, I responded to the jokes that my younger self didn’t notice or find all that amusing. So it just goes to show that the movies don’t change—we do.

Harley Cross and Majandra Delfino must unmask the killer a number of times in Shriek If You Know What I Did Last Friday the 13th before learning their true identity.










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