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The 5 Most Obnoxious Children In Horror!

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Obnoxious Children

As in most movies, children can play an important part in horror movies. Sometimes though, those children can hamper your enjoyment of the film you’re watching. Be they bratty, evil, murderous, or just plain stupid, children in horror movies have the worst track record when it comes to being likable. Here are five of the worst offenders!

***SPOILERS BELOW***

Mara Chaffee – Village of the Damned

Village of the Damned may not be one of John Carpenter’s best movies, but it features one of his most memorable and brattiest villains. Mara (Lindsey Haun, True Blood) is a bitch of the highest order. The leader of a group of telepathic and mind-controlling children, her mere presence is enough to make you want to jump through the screen and give her a good slap across her face.


Lex Murphy – Jurassic Park

First of all: yes I’m qualifying Jurassic Park as a horror film. Many people group Lex and Tim together when talking about how annoying they are, but I maintain that Lex is the true obnoxious child of this duo. At least Tim snaps out of his fear and get shit done. Lex, with the exception of her restoring power to the control room, is just a whiny, cloying pre-teen. Some slack must be given to her since it is understandable for a child to be so freaked out while being attacked by dinosaurs, but she took it just a smidgen too far.


Charlie Sandin – The Purge

It’s not that Charlie is consistently annoying throughout the course of The Purge, it’s just that he makes one really stupid decision. On Purge night, when everything is supposed to be locked down, he opts to raise the security walls in his house to let in a stranger (Edwin Hodge) being stalked by a group of Purgers, thereby setting up the main conflict of the film. Of course, without that stupid decision, there would be no film, so you can’t complain about it too much. Actor Max Burkholder is no stranger to playing obnoxious children (anyone who watched him play Max Braverman on NBC’s Parenthood knows this better than anyone), so he gave it his all in The Purge.


Esther Coleman – Orphan

If you know the twist in Orphan, then you know that her inclusion on this list may be a bit of a cheat, but until that twist is made public, Esther is a demon child straight out of your nightmares. She’s also such a self-entitled little brat that even her quick death by neck-breaking doesn’t seem like it’s harsh enough.


Samuel Vanek – The Babadook

You didn’t think I would make a list about obnoxious children in horror movies and not include this little douchebag, did you? While he was played to perfection by actor Noah Wiseman, Samuel is hands down one of the most annoying children put in a film, horror or otherwise. It got to the point where you were practically begging for the titular bogeyman to eat him (or whatever it is the Babadook does, since he doesn’t actually kill anyone in the film). I get that the film is about a mother trying to get over the grief of losing her husband (with the Babadook as a personification of that grief), but this kid was too much. I wouldn’t have spent a single second saving him.

What are some other children in horror movies that bugged the crap out of you? Let us know in the comments below!

A journalist for Bloody Disgusting since 2015, Trace writes film reviews and editorials, as well as co-hosts Bloody Disgusting's Horror Queers podcast, which looks at horror films through a queer lens. He has since become dedicated to amplifying queer voices in the horror community, while also injecting his own personal flair into film discourse. Trace lives in Denver, CO with his husband and their two dogs. Find him on Twitter @TracedThurman

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Editorials

Why Mainstream Horror Should Lighten Up

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“Elevated Horror.” Of all the combinations in the English language, that one is the most insufferable. 

It represents almost a decade of scary movies that, for the most part, took themselves too seriously. Horror responds to the moment, so its “why so serious” lean makes sense as we scuttle through the “worst of times” equation of Charles Dickens’ famous opening lines. But there’s still an opening and a need for a lighter approach; one that not only has fun with its audience but takes the piss out of a genre that is seemingly letting its newfound “respectability” go to its head. 

Wes Craven believed devotees see horror films to let out their fears one primal scream at a time. At their core, these movies are roller coasters; they bring us as close to the edge as possible before pulling us back into a safety net of reality. The need for a bigger and badder coaster increases during times when the size of that net decreases.

There’s a thrill that comes from imagining being in a foot race with a madman, or outthinking the hordes of zombies on the other side of the door, plus the scavenger humans coming behind them. There’s even a rush that comes from imagining how one might deal with possession to see good triumph over evil in the end. It’s all about building tension and releasing it through catharsis. That cathartic release usually sounds like screams followed by laughter, which signals relief. Genre heavy hitters over the past 10 years offered very little of that respite when the credits rolled. Films like Hereditary, The Witch, Talk to Me, and even Smile (pick one) keep that tension going after the screen fades to black.

Hereditary

As the genre became obsessed with creating trauma metaphors, that lack of release made sense. Anyone with even a small sample size of traumatic experiences knows those emotions don’t magically resolve themselves in an allotted run time. But how much trauma can one take? Especially when there’s a mess going on outside that few of us can escape from. Movies offer that off-ramp, no matter how short. 

Everything can’t be, nor should it be, “elevated.” Audiences need thoughtful explorations of life’s ills via monsters as much as they need murdering masked maniacs with kitchen knives. And no, it doesn’t have to go any deeper than that. Sometimes, a knife is just a knife, and it’s still worth our time and respect. As weird as it sounds, that simplicity is comforting not in spite of the trauma but because of it. 

The worst of times should manifest more than just anguish. People need to laugh just as much as they need to think seriously about this moment in time. Even the Scream franchise forgot the meta rock upon which it built its church when the latest foray sacrificed the subtle comedy for serious drama. Scary Movie returned at the perfect moment. It provides the necessary laughs, but it’s not a cure-all.

This isn’t a call for Scary Movie imitators but a return to a mainstream landscape where Killer Klowns from Outer Space sat with The Serpent and the Rainbow, nestled neatly with the latest Nightmare on Elm Street, which took nothing away from The Vanishing.

They Live

Even They Live, John Carpenter’s horror sci-fi satire sandwich, kept its tongue firmly in cheek while discussing serious ideas still relevant in 2026. Yes, a film about aliens taking over the world through subliminal messaging only visible through coded sunglasses is, in fact, a tad silly. Carpenter understood that mainstream horror can’t become so self-important that it never looks itself in the mirror and laughs at that inherent silliness. 

The thing is, horror historically excels at poking fun at itself. Most of the Scream franchise, The Cabin in the Woods, or The Blackening show adoration without kowtowing. They recognize tropes and trappings but invert them for an audience already in on the joke, but one that also finds solace in said conventions. This keeps the genre on its toes; once something gets parodied, it’s usually time to evolve. That breeds new ideas and fresh filmmakers, which not only strengthen the genre’s collective voice but also amplify it.

Get Out, as “elevated” as some critics want us to believe it is, is a cathartic, populist scary movie that spoke to an untapped audience rather than speaking down to them. Backrooms is one of the biggest horror hits in years, partially because it’s fine-tuned for modern-day teenagers instead of their parents. Movies like these tell everyone the genre is open for business; open for innovation and, yeah, open for new ways in which people can lovingly poke fun at with a wink and a nudge. 

Horror needs dread as much as it needs laughter.

Catharsis is just as important as tension, and pulpy populism has the same merit as more high-brow material. Respectability shouldn’t come at the expense of an experience akin to walking through a haunted house. At a time when joy seems in short supply, horror should look to its past to map out its future, and make things just a tad brighter for audiences.

Backrooms

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