Podcasts
The “Dumb Fun” of Renny Harlin’s Homoerotic ‘The Covenant’ [Horror Queers Podcast]
Forgiven for Forgetting
After starting the year with one of the best horror sequels of all time in Hellbound: Hellraiser II, we moved into the hilariously smart German satire Killer Condom. Trace and I should have known the good times wouldn’t last!
With this week’s discussion of Renny Harlin‘s The Covenant, we begin a two-week stretch of poorly rated, very dumb thrillers. In the film, Caleb (Steven Strait) is a member of the popular Boys of Ipswich at an elite boarding school. He also has a dangerous birthright: the men in his family can use The Power to get what they want.
The trade-off? The more they use their abilities, the faster they age, as evidenced by his father’s (Stephen McHattie) condition.
Things change with the arrival of dangerous bad boy Chase (Sebastian Stan). Suddenly both Caleb’s relationship with Sarah (Laura Ramsey) and his 18th birthday ascension are under threat. Will Caleb survive long enough to fully come into his powers, or is he doomed to become Chase’s wi-otch?
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Episode 265 – The Covenant (2006)
Q: What do you get when you cross The Lost Boys with The Craft but make it awful?
A: J.S. Cardone and Renny Harlin’s The Covenant (2006), which features hot boy witches throwing globs of CGI semen at each other!
We have so much to say about this nonsense, including its overly complicated mythology and self-serious tone, villainous bisexual king Chase (played by Sebastian Stan), thankless damsels in distress, and addiction/gay allegories (paging Buffy S06).
Plus: insects vs spiders, throwing the script supervisor under the bus, and why Stephen McHattie should have had a bigger role!
Cross out The Covenant!
Coming up on Wednesday: Our dumb fun run continues with Christian E. Christiansen’s “baby Single White Female” film, The Roommate (2011)!
P.S. Subscribe to our Patreon for nearly 284 hours of Patreon content including this month’s new episodes on Hannibal S01E01, Mimic (1997), Founders Day and Night Swim, plus an audio commentary celebrating the 10th anniversary of The Babadook (2014).
The Halloweenies celebrate Alien Day (LV-4/26) with a Resurrection!
Join co-hosts Dan Caffrey, McKenzie Gerber, Michael Roffman, and Justin Gerber as they awaken from a cryosleep of 200 years aboard the Auriga. In the first of two episodes dedicated to Alien Resurrection, the gang talks the development, the production, Joss Whedon, Jean-Pierre Jeunet, and what this all this might be like under Danny Boyle’s direction.
Stream the first of two episodes below, and stay tuned for Pt. on May 3rd. Later in May, they will also cover both 2004’s Alien vs. Predator and 2007’s Alien vs. Predator: Requiem.
Subscribe to the Halloweenies via Apple Podcasts, Spotify, Stitcher, RadioPublic, and RSS. New to the Halloweenies? Catch up with the gang by revisiting their essential episodes on past franchises such as Halloween, A Nightmare on Elm Street, Friday the 13th, Scream, The Evil Dead, and Chucky! This year? They’re looking to the stars with the Alien franchise.
You can also become a member of their Patreon, The Rewind, for hilariously irreverent commentaries (e.g. The Texas Chainsaw Massacre, Gremlins, Jaws), one-off deep dives on your favorite rentals (e.g. Killer Klowns from Outer Space, Invasion of the Body Snatchers ), and even spinoffs like their recent run Fortune & Glory: An Indiana Jones Podcast.
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