Quantcast
Connect with us

Movies

[Review] Alex Aja’s ‘Piranha 3D’ is Fun and Off-the-Hook Bloody!

“Delivering all sorts of bloody goodness, Piranha is Alex Aja’s best film since High Tension… It’s damn fun, and off the hook bloody. If anything, the spring break summer massacre sequence will go down in infamy as one of the most awesome and insane horror moments of all time.”

Published

on

In a day and age where 3-D movie making is out of control, one of the only films that truly deserved the technology was Dimension Films’ Piranha 3D. The 80’s homage deserved an 80’s-esque gimmick that would put blood, guts, and plenty of boobs in your face. While the Alex Aja-directed remake is definitely a bloody good time, the post-converted 3-D technology looks like sh*t, contrary to what anybody else says.

Normally, I would make a quick statement about the 3-D and then suggest you see it in 2-D, but the problem with Piranha is that it’s being sold as this epic 3-D throwback to the 80’s. Aja jams nudity, piranha, eyeballs, and even boat motors, in your face – only they never penetrate the screen. Why? Because when you post-convert a movie it adds depth, not dimensions. The film is loaded with great gags, only there are no real payoffs as you just kind of stare at the floating eyeball and go, “well, that’s cool.” The most shocking part about it is that the piranha themselves were done in CG, therefore they should have easily been floating beyond the screen and biting my face off. Nope.

Getting the 3-D out of the way, Piranha is actually a pretty fun movie. It captures the spirit of the original in various ways, but most notably the way Aja shoots the piranha attacks. Much like Joe Dante’s 1978 film of the same name, when the teens are getting eaten alive, we see them thrashing around, and get close-up underwater shots of the fish shaking and biting into their skin. The sole difference is that the 2010 version features chunks of flesh being torn off, and the fish being CG instead of puppets. But before you freak, the CG effects work is beautifully done. The fish look hyper-real, and f*cking scary. Aja even opted to use as much practical effects work as he possibly could, a feat that’s commendable on so many levels. The epic attack sequence – where hundreds of douche bag partiers are ravaged alive – is hands down one of the goriest scenes ever caught on film. The water is completely red as we see kids climbing onto boats, rafts, and running to shore, all with chunks of flesh missing from all of their bodies. Some people are dragged to safety – only they’ve had their arms or legs chewed straight down to the bone (in one scene, one of the main characters hilariously exclaims, “It ate my penis!”).

Speaking of humor, the cast is pretty incredible (sans jackass Steven McQueen, the film’s Achilles’ heel). Christopher Lloyd, who plays a scientist named Dr. Goodman, hilariously acts as if he’s Doc Brown from Back to the Future, while Richard Dreyfuss cameos as Matt Boyd (aka Matt Hooper) from Jaws (he drinks Amity beer, and the Jaws song plays on the radio). Jerry O’Connell had me cracking up as the “Wild Wild Girls” owner, a narcissistic, egotistical, womanizing dirtbag with some serious game. Unfortunately, he sidekick Andrew, played by the brilliant Paul Scheer, is incredibly underused. Kelly Brook is going to give Megan Fox a run for her money as one of the hottest women alive. If you can shake her off your mind for a split second, Piranha runs rampant with the nudity, flashing more than enough T+A your way.

As for the plot, going in I knew it was going to be a mind-numbing experience. The plan: get popcorn, get a drink, turn brain off, and then enjoy… and I did. Piranha is quite fun, especially in the thick of it. It’s unfortunate, though, that the third act lacks a sense of urgency. While Kelly (Jessica Szohr) is trapped inside a sinking boat, a whole bunch of obnoxious nonsense occurs (including way too much talking). Julie Forester (Elisabeth Shue) and Novak (Adam Scott) come to the rescue and throw a rope for Jake Forester (McQueen) to anchor to the sinking ship. Instead of everyone rushing over to safety, Julie crawls all the way to the sinking ship, has a long-winded conversation, attempts (and fails) to save Kelly, before climbing back with two of her kids, and Danni (Brook), all at the SAME F*CKING TIME. This weighs down the anchor and a whole lot of piranha biting occurs. The entire sequence is absolutely moronic, boring and frustrating. But again, let’s check the list: popcorn, soda, brain on “off”. Ok, it gets a pass… but still, it could have been more exciting.

In retrospect, one of the only things that really could have made Piranha an epic, off-the-wall summer blast would have been to do 3-D correctly (especially because I would have then been able to pretend slap the floating face of sh*tty actor Steven McQueen). Delivering all sorts of bloody goodness, Piranha is Alex Aja’s best film since High Tension. If you can get past the flaws scattered throughout, it’s a great flick to watch with a bunch of your friends on one of the final weekends of the summer. It’s damn fun, and off the hook bloody. If anything, the spring break summer massacre sequence will go down in infamy as one of the most awesome and insane horror moments of all time.

Movies

Friday, June 12 – These 7 New Horror Movies Released Today

Published

on

New Horror Movies June 2026
Pictured: 'Kraken'

This week’s new releases offer everything from giant monsters to Spielberg aliens to ass-kicking martial artists and even an ash-eating medical student. Do we have your interest?

Here’s all the new genre movies that released on Friday, June 12, 2026!

These aren’t all HORROR movies, but we want you to be aware of them all the same…


Norwegian creature feature Kraken is now available on Digital.

The film was also unleashed in select theaters. Check your local listings.

In the monster movie Kraken, “unnatural behavior in wild salmon, followed by inexplicable deaths in Norway’s deepest fjord, points to the mythical Kraken. The ancient, multi-armed monster has awakened, ready to crush everything that moves or makes a sound.”

Pål Øie (The Tunnel) directs Samuel Goldwyn Films’ Kraken from a script by Vilde Eide, Kjersti Jelen Rasmussen, and Natasha Arthur. Sara Khorami, Mikkel Bratt Silset, Øyvind Brandtzæg, Jenny Evensen, Ingvild Holthe Bygdnes, Jon Erik Myre, Hans Morten Hansen, Steinar Klouman Hallert, and Filip Bargee Ramberg star.


An all girls trip into the desert for escapism fun instead implodes in violence in the revenge thriller Find Your Friends, now streaming only on Shudder.

In the film, “Amber and her four best friends flee Los Angeles for a girls’ trip in Joshua Tree, only to find themselves unwelcome in a desert town simmering with quiet hostility. As isolation sets in and encounters with aggressive locals grow more threatening, festering resentments within the group begin to surface.

“What begins as fun and reckless escape spirals into a violent struggle for control and survival, as past wounds and present dangers collide in a night that turns their trip into a nightmare.”

Bella Thorne (The Babysitter), Chloe Cherry (“Euphoria”), Helena Howard (I Saw the TV Glow), Sophia Ali (Uncharted), Zion Moreno (“Gossip Girl”), and Chris Bauer (“True Blood”) star in the feature debut by writer/director Izabel Pakzad.


Steven Spielberg is more sure today than he was when he made Close Encounters and ET that aliens are very real, and with Disclosure Day, he aims to make you a believer too.

Okay so it’s not a horror movie, but the sci-fi blockbuster is now playing in theaters.

The vague synopsis for Disclosure Day reads: “If you found out we weren’t alone, if someone showed you, proved it to you, would that frighten you? This summer, the truth belongs to seven billion people. We are coming close to Disclosure Day.”

The film stars SAG winner and Oscar® nominee Emily Blunt (Oppenheimer, A Quiet Place), Emmy and Golden Globe winner Josh O’Connor (Challengers, The Crown), Oscar® winner Colin Firth (The King’s Speech, Kingsman franchise), Eve Hewson (Bad Sisters, The Perfect Couple) and two-time Oscar® nominee Colman Domingo (Sing Sing, Rustin).

Based on a story by Spielberg, the screenplay is by David Koepp, whose previous work with Spielberg includes the scripts for Jurassic Park, The Lost World: Jurassic Park, War of the Worlds and Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull. Combined, those films earned more than $3 billion worldwide. Koepp also wrote the script for Jurassic World Rebirth.

Steven Spielberg is of course no stranger to extraterrestrial encounters, directing two of the greatest alien movies of all time: Close Encounters of the Third Kind in 1977 and E.T. in 1982. It’s an arena he returned to in 2005, directing an adaptation of H.G. Wells’ War of the Worlds.

Here in 2026, Steven Spielberg sees hope in the existence of aliens. He notes in the final trailer for Disclosure Day, “How will disclosure change us? I believe for the better.”


Another movie that’s not a horror movie but worth mentioning here is the violent martial arts revenge thriller The Furious, which is now playing in theaters from Lionsgate.

Xie Miao (The New Legend of Shaolin) and Joe Taslim (Mortal Kombat) star.

After his daughter is kidnapped by a criminal network and he receives no help from the corrupt police, Wang Wei sets out on a rampage to find her himself.

His only ally is Navin, a relentless journalist whose wife has mysteriously disappeared. Fueled by a furious vengeance, the unlikely duo ruthlessly fights against the kidnappers.

Kenji Tanigaki (Enter the Fat Dragon) directs from a script by Mak Tin Shu (Kung Fu Jungle), Lei ZhilongShum Kwan Sin (Twilight of the Warriors: Walled In), and Frank Hui.


A disturbing weight loss craze involving human ashes opens up a haunting world of hurt for a young woman in Saccharine, which is now available on Digital outlets at home.

From writer/director Natalie Erika James (RelicApartment 7A), the Australian supernatural body horror film follows lovelorn medical student Hana, who becomes terrorized by a sinister force after taking part in an obscure weight loss craze: eating human ashes.

Midori Francis (“Grey’s Anatomy”), Danielle Macdonald (Patti Cake$), and Madeleine Madden (“The Wheel of Time”) star in Natalie Erika James’ latest nightmare.


From directors Arturo Ambriz and Roy AmbrizI Am Frankelda is billed as the first ever full length stop motion movie from Mexico, and it’s now streaming on Netflix.

The history-making stop-motion film is a dark fantasy set in a world of monsters.

Here’s the synopsis: “In 19th-century Mexico, Frankelda is a gifted writer whose dark tales are ignored and dismissed. Forced to suppress her voice, she refuses to give up, even as many try to silence her. But when she is thrust into her subconscious, the very monsters she created come to life.

“Guided by Herneval, a tormented prince trapped between dreams and nightmares, she must restore balance between fiction and reality before both realms collapse. Meanwhile, the sinister writer Procustes and his conspirators plot to seize control. As Frankelda and Herneval grow closer, their bond becomes both a strength and a curse.

“To rewrite their fate, she must confront a love that defies existence and reclaim her power as a storyteller—before dark forces consume her imagination and reveal horrors beyond her creation.”

The directors said in a joint statement, “As brothers, we grew up inventing worlds together, drawing, playing, imagining. Over time we understood that fictional characters were not only companions but guides. Sometimes they felt closer than the people around us. They provided us courage, wisdom, and solace. We believe fiction is not an escape from reality but a way of understanding it. A way of converting truth into palatable chunks. I Am Frankelda comes from a lifelong love of storytelling.”

Mireya Mendoza, Arturo Mercado Jr., and Luis Leonardo Suarez lead the voice cast.

Meagan Navarro writes in her review for Bloody Disgusting, “Mexico’s first stop-motion animated feature is a macabre beauty.” Meagan also notes in her review, “I Am Frankelda is a gothic fantasy feature whose boundless creativity is matched by its ambition.”


The lines of reality and delusion blur in Time of Death, now available on Digital.

Michael Kelly (“The Penguin,” Dawn of the Dead 2004) stars with Kevin Pollak (End of Days), Mena Suvari (Vampires of the Velvet Lounge), and Dennis Haysbert (Send Help).

In the horror-thriller, “When a prisoner vanishes without a trace, Detective Frank Morley (Michael Kelly) is sent to a decaying prison on the verge of shutdown. What begins as a routine investigation quickly spirals into a dangerous search for answers.”

Will Wernick (Escape Room 2017, Follow Me) directs from a script by Jason Rosen. They also produce alongside Kelly Delson, Jeff Delson, and Kyle David Crosby.

Continue Reading