This is what happens when an adult gets high and watches a children’s special.
Originally telecast in December of 1966, the animated special Dr. Seuss’ How the Grinch Stole Christmas has been a holiday staple ever since, teaching children and adults alike the true meaning of Christmas for the past 50 years.
In the special, based on Seuss’ book, the titular Grinch initially tries to destroy Christmas for the Whos down in Whoville, but his heart ultimately grows three sizes when he realizes that taking away presents and tearing down decorations can not break the Christmas spirit of the Whos. Their spirit wins him over, and the special ends with the Grinch himself carving up the “roast beast” at the Whos’ Christmas celebration.
But what exactly is a “roast beast,” you may be asking yourself? Well, that question was the catalyst for Geraldine DeRuiter‘s How the Grinch Stole Christmas fan theory, wherein she posits that maybe, just maybe, the Whos, well… they’re cannibals?!
“I would like to take a moment to discuss something that has always bothered me every holiday season,” the must-read thread began over on Twitter this week…
I would like to take a moment to discuss something that has always bothered me every holiday season.
I think it’s weird that the Whos down in Whoville and The Grinch are carnivores. pic.twitter.com/8zew11v3Bw
— Geraldine (@everywhereist) November 28, 2017
It is safe to assume that the Whos and the Grinch are mammals. They appear to be, anyway. And we can safely assume that the Roast beast is, too, though it might possess a cloven hoof (which the Whos and the Grinch do not appear to).
— Geraldine (@everywhereist) November 28, 2017
But there is something, something about the shape and size of the roast beast that I find unnerving. It is not altogether that different from the shape of the Grinch or the Whos themselves. pic.twitter.com/PXTY19woSi
— Geraldine (@everywhereist) November 28, 2017
And then there is the vagueness of the term “roast beast”. If someone served me that at their home, I would immediately want to know what, specifically, it was. If it was shaped roughly like a person, this would be doubly true.
— Geraldine (@everywhereist) November 28, 2017
Granted, I eat meat. Many, many humans do. But we tend to, as a species, generally stay away from other primates, particularly those that are similar in size to us.
I do not think that the Whos are restricted by those same taboos.
— Geraldine (@everywhereist) November 28, 2017
The narrative also seems to suggest that the Grinch is not a Who. Aesthetically, he is different – covered entirely in fur, while the Whos seem to have a delineation between the dermis and their hair, as Cindy Loo Who illustrates.
(Gosh, she’s cute. And possibly a cannibal.) pic.twitter.com/3mWMsXwsWV
— Geraldine (@everywhereist) November 28, 2017
What was the source of the rift between the Whos and the Grinch? We never find out, but I have my suspicions. See, the Grinch hates their joy, and I wonder if he finds mirth in the face of cannibalism offensive.
Yes, cannibalism.
— Geraldine (@everywhereist) November 28, 2017
Remember how he takes the last can of Who Hash? What the hell is Who Hash? Naming conventions would suggest it is A HASH MADE OF WHO. Food is not named for who consumes it. It’s named for ingredients. E.g., corn beef hash.
WHO HASH CONTAINS WHOS. And it’s commercially produced.
— Geraldine (@everywhereist) November 28, 2017
Which means this cannibalism is wide-spread.
Now, take the Grinch – already an outlier by appearance. If the Who are willing to eat their own, what’s stopping them from eating someone a little different? NOTHING.
The Grinch knew this. So he fled town.
— Geraldine (@everywhereist) November 28, 2017
But then, eventually, they win him over with their cult-like resilience and hypnotic song. And without a clear reason why, he goes to them. HE IS IN A TRANCE.
And then “the Grinch himself even carved the roast beast” – that’s a critical plot point. He is fully assimilated now.
— Geraldine (@everywhereist) November 28, 2017
We are left with an idyllic scene – everyone enjoying the vague carcass that may be a forsaken Who.
But what happens the next time the Whos need to feast? Where do you think they will source their meat from?
You know as well as I do.
The Whos are gonna eat the Grinch. pic.twitter.com/pr1QvtoutM
— Geraldine (@everywhereist) November 28, 2017
Don’t think they’ve forgotten what the Grinch did to them.
No one forgives that easily.
They’re willing to eat their own, so they’re more than certainly willing to eat an outsider. Especially one who tried to ruin Christmas.
— Geraldine (@everywhereist) November 28, 2017