Alright, we’re back with the Instant horror releases for Netflix. And what a good week to come back. Italian film lovers will be delighted, as Netflix has struck a deal to instantly release a pile of Giallos and Italian greats from Argento, Fulci, and others.
Rutger Hauer and his trusty shotgun also are now available to stream along with that really, really, really awful (and hilarious) movie that centers on Rod, Natalie and .gifs of exploding birds. If you desire a little James Woods in your house you can watch him stick a VHS tape in his “new flesh”.
And finally, if muscle-bound super killers are your thing Vin Diesel can hook you up with his early 2000s sci-fi horror great. Lots of quality choices out there on Instant for horror. Now get to watching.
Netflix Instant Horror In Your House
Aug 11th, 2011
Instant release date in parenthesis:
HOBO WITH A SHOTGUN (Aug 5)
This gory, gleefully over-the-top revenge fantasy stars Rutger Hauer as the Hobo, a bum who rolls into town hoping to start over, only to find his adopted city saturated in violence and ruled by a vicious crime lord known as the Drake (Brian Downey). The Hobo’s answer? Pick up his handy pump-action scattergun and start laying waste to crooks, corrupt cops and every other lowlife who crosses his path.
MICAH SAYS: Dirty. Nasty. And especially depraved. YES PLEASE!
MISERY (Aug 2)
Annie Wilkes (Kathy Bates) rescues her idol, romance novelist Paul Sheldon (James Caan), after he crashes his car during a fierce blizzard. But when she finds out he plans to kill off the heroine in his next volume, Annie morphs from nurturing caregiver to sadistic jailer. In this tightly wound, suspenseful adaptation of Stephen King’s novel, Bates earns her Best Actress Oscar as a woman come undone in a claustrophobia-inducing house of horrors.
MICAH SAYS: I watched this again the other night and it holds up as well as ever. Still had to look away during the leg-breaking scene. **shudders**
GOTHIKA (Aug 1)
After a car crash, a criminal psychologist (Halle Berry) comes to, only to find that she’s a patient in the same mental institution that currently employs her. It seems she’s been accused of murdering her husband — but she has no memory of committing the crime. As she tries to regain her memory and convince her co-workers of her innocence, a vengeful spirit uses her as an earthly pawn, which further convinces everyone of her guilt.
SCREAM 3 (July 28)
The last installment of the tongue-in-cheek (but still scary) horror trilogy finds Sidney Prescott again battling a crazed killer — only this time it’s on the set of Stab, a movie-within-a-movie based on the original Woodsboro murders. Gale Weathers (Courteney Cox), Dewey Riley (David Arquette) and the rest of the Scream gang appear, alongside new characters played by Parker Posey, Jenny McCarthy and more.
MICAH SAYS: Even worse than I remember it being. Mainly because it feels very topical and unimportant today. Also, the whole thing sucks.
THE MUMMY (1932) (Aug 2)
When British archaeologists uncover the ancient sarcophagus of a mummified Egyptian priest (Boris Karloff), they foolishly ignore its warning not to open the box, and the mummy is brought back to life. Taking the form of a modern Egyptian, he quickly begins his quest to resurrect the soul of his love, which he believes has been reincarnated in a modern woman (Zita Johann). Noted German cinematographer Karl Freund makes his directing debut.
HATCHET (Aug 5)
When Ben (Joel Moore), his friend Marcus (Deon Richmond) and assorted strangers embark on a creepy nighttime boat trip into the bayou, their journey takes them into the lair of Victor Crowley (Kane Hodder), a freak of nature whose deformity has turned him into a bloodthirsty killer. Only Marybeth (Tamara Feldman), one of the travelers, holds the secret that may keep them alive. Horror legend Robert Englund co-stars in this comic gore fest.
MICAH SAYS: Gleefully spills blood while paying tribute (both literally and figuratively) to the great slashers of the `80s.
MANIAC! (Aug 2)
Although his mother mistreated him and is now dead, Frank (Joe Spinell), a photographer by day, misses her. In a grotesque act of reminiscence, he kills young women at night and puts their scalps on mannequins masquerading around his New York apartment. He befriends a fellow photographer, but soon his day and night lives begin to meld, blurring the lines of reality. William Lustig directs this disturbing tale known for its graphic violence.
MICAH SAYS: Ugly and grungy. Just the way I like my exploitation / slasher films.
BLACK BELLY OF THE TARANTULA (Aug 2)
An indefatigable detective (Giancarlo Giannini) is on the trail of a deranged serial killer with a unique method of murder: He abducts beautiful women and injects them with the poison of a wasp, which paralyzes them just enough to witness their own agonizing deaths. Directed by Paolo Cavara, this engrossing entry in the giallo genre of horror films features a score by spaghetti Western composer Ennio Morricone.
MICAH SAYS: Starts off with a hot naked lady getting a massage. Yeah, that kind of massage, you perves. It’s Giallo love week at Netflix Instant.
A botched experiment in virtual reality transmits the soul of infamous British occultist Aleister Crowley into the body of shy professor Haddo (Simon Callow), whose life quickly descends into a maelstrom of sex, violence and depraved behavior. Eager to foil Haddo’s satanic efforts is handsome physicist Dr. Joshua Mathers (Kal Weber). Iron Maiden vocalist Bruce Dickinson co-wrote the screenplay for this supernatural thriller.
DEEP RED (Aug 2)
In Dario Argento’s horror classic jazz pianist Marcus Daly (David Hemmings) witnesses the murder of his neighbor, a psychic who had read the mind of her killer. Marcus soon teams up with a resourceful reporter (Daria Nicolodi), and the two set out to find the killer. After the professor (Glauco Mauri) Marcus called on for help turns up dead, Marcus realizes that he’ll be the next to die if he can’t track down the killer.
MICAH SAYS: Near perfect film. Argento’s masterpiece and most complete film.
DON’T TOTURE A DUCKLING (Aug 2)
Tomas Milian and Barbara Bouchet star in one of director Lucio Fulci’s most disturbing horror films. In rural Sicily, Italy, a psychotic killer is on the rampage, performing a series of shocking child murders for which there are many suspects. Among the potential culprits are a gypsy, a prostitute and a priest, but despite the plethora of possible perpetrators, the gruesome case proves baffling.
MICAH SAYS: One of the best Giallos. I’d put it in my top 5 list in a heartbeat. Another sweet Instant score.
THE GIALLO COLLECTION: NIGHT OF THE GLASS DOLLS (Aug 2)
Giallo refers to the controversial series of Italian suspense thrillers that shocked international audiences in the 1960s and ’70s, and director Aldo Lado serves up a frightful piece of terror with this genre entry. The presumably dead body of a man is brought to a hospital, where the corpse’s thoughts become audible. As he stops listening to doctors squabbling and begins to remember who he is and why he’s there, terror explodes.
THE GIALLO COLLECTION: THE BLOODSTAINED SHADOW (Aug 2)
“Giallo” refers to the controversial series of savage Italian suspense thrillers that shocked international audiences in the 1960s and 1970s. Director Antonio Bido delivers all of the sex, violence, and surprising twists the genre is known for in this story of two brothers — a professor and a priest — investigate a series of brutal murders. Can they get to the bottom of the slayings before their own traumatic childhood memories consume them?
THE GIALLO COLLECTION: WHO SAW HER DIE? (Aug 2)
“Giallo” refers to the controversial series of savage Italian suspense thrillers that shocked international audiences in the 1960s and 1970s. In this “giallo” from director Aldo Lado, the daughter of a well-known sculptor is murdered. As the sculptor and his wife investigate, they discover that their knowledge puts them in grave danger, as the killer begins butchering everyone who knows too much. With the body count rising, can truth survive?
INFERNO (Aug 2)
The second in Dario Argento’s “Three Mothers” trilogy, Inferno focuses on a Manhattan apartment building that is inhabited by a deadly spirit that murders the tenants in increasingly gruesome and sadistic ways. When poet Rose discovers a book that suggests she’s living in a building built for one of three evil sisters to rule the world, she pleads for her brother to visit her from Rome. But when he arrives, she’s disappeared without a trace.
MICAH SAYS: The second in Argento’s “Three Mothers Trilogy”. This one is the follow up to “Suspiria” and another must watch for Italian horror film lovers. In fact, I might say start with this one and branch out.
THE PERFUME OF THE LADY IN BLACK (Aug 2)
Industrial chemist Sylvia Hacherman (Mimsy Farmer) seemingly has it all: a job that she loves and is well compensated for, a handsome boyfriend (Maurizio Bonuglia), and a lovely apartment in a picturesque and friendly neighborhood — but then the odd visions begin. Soon, she begins to lose her grasp on what’s real and what’s not as details from grisly childhood events merge with equally disturbing present-day goings on.
MARK OF THE DEVIL (Aug2)
In 18th-century Austria, evil Count Cumberland (Herbert Lom) captures young women he deems to be witches, then tortures and kills them with the help of his faithful assistant, Baron Christian Von Mem (Udo Kier). When this classic splatter-fest from Germany was first released, theaters in the United States handed out complimentary barf bags to patrons paying to see the film, which was considered outrageously shocking at the time.
MICAH SAYS: Back in 1970 when this film was released sick bags were handed out to the audience prior to the screenings. I’d love to make someone who ralphed over this boring flick watch some of the modern extreme gross out stuff we all watch today.
VIDEODROME (Aug 2)
Sleazy TV executive Max Renn (James Woods) is looking for cheap, exciting programming for his fly-by-night channel when he fortuitously stumbles across a fuzzy satellite feed showing torture, punishment … and possibly murder. A conspiracy is afoot as two competing groups fight for the 20th century’s soul, using the airwaves as their battlefield. Renn searches for the truth, all the while obsessed by an on-air chanteuse (Deborah Harry).
MICAH SAYS: You could easily put “Deep Red”, “Inferno” and this, one of Cronenberg’s best, in a top 50 horror movies of all time list. Not a bad week of releases for Instant horror lovers.
THE PIT AND THE PENDULUM (Aug 2)
Francis (John Kerr) visits the gloomy Spanish castle of his late sister Elizabeth’s husband, Nicholas (Vincent Price), to learn the reason for her death. Nicholas fears his wife isn’t really dead and that her spirit wanders the halls at night. Seems Nicholas’s father was a feared leader of the Spanish Inquisition; as a child, Nicholas saw his father torture his mother and bury her alive, and he’s convinced Elizabeth has suffered a similar fate.
THREE… EXTREMES II (Aug 1)
Three of Asia’s most prominent horror directors — Ji-woon Kim,Nonzee Nimibutr and Peter Chan — offer up some of their creepiest tales in this spine-chilling collection of short films. In Kim’s “Memories,” a husband awakens to find a mutilated body in his car. In Nimibutr’s “The Wheel,” a Thai village is terrorized by colorful puppets. And in Chan’s “Going Home,” a father is held captive by a man who keeps his dead wife “alive.”
BIRDEMIC: SHOCK AND TERROR (July 22)
When sexy model Nathalie (Whitney Moore) and software guru Rod (Alan Bagh) head to a motel for an afternoon tryst, they are attacked by a flock of savage exploding eagles and other birds of prey in the first wave of an all-out avian war against humanity. As the lovers scramble to find food, water and safety, they team up with gun-toting campers to rescue a pair of orphaned kids.James Nguyen directs this low-budget indie thriller.
MICAH SAYS: Even watching this at home, by myself, I still felt so embarrassed for everyone involved that I had to turn away. Especially during the meeting between Rod and Natalie. This movie lives up to its hype of being a mind-blowingly bad film on par with the likes of “Troll 2″ and “Manos”.
PITCH BLACK (July 31)
After crash-landing on a seemingly lifeless planet, pilot Carolyn Fry (Radha Mitchell) and the remaining passengers — including murderer Riddick (Vin Diesel) and policeman William J. Johns (Cole Hauser) — encounter an army of creatures whose only weakness is light. As night approaches and the aliens emerge, the passengers must rely on Riddick’s powerful night vision to lead them through the darkness in director David N. Twohy’s sci-fi thriller.
MICAH SAYS: I want, scratch that, need at least one if not two more sequels than we have now. At least give us a third film. Who’s with me?