When a film like 2007’s Grizzly Rage roars right out of the gate with a car filled with some of the most annoying people ever put to the screen, and you find yourself in excruciating pain – your skin crawling with repulsion for low IQ immaturity – the only thing left that might be redeeming is seeing them all torn to graphically violent pieces.  Maybe watch them suffer, or get reduced to shredded limbs.  Or meat, just danging in the choppers of a pissed off bear.

So is there any bloody redemption here for your time spent?

Hellllll no.

Its about four kids who hop into a rover they completely beat the shit out of before breaking down on their way to Saranac Grotto – an abandoned, chain link fenced, toxic waste dump. Its a barren stretch of woods with, of course, no cell service. While skidding all over the road for no reason, they run over and kill a baby grizzly cub. Momma grizzly immediately gets pissed and the froth mouthed, TV-movie caliber chase is on. All the while, back home, I’m sure whatever parent that owned the truck is hoping they die horrible deaths.

OK, I added that part in there. But I wouldn’t be surprised if they were.

Your bottom line: there’s a lot of emo goin around here while they run aimlessly through the woods.  A LOT.  They brood and pout and argue and pace, wrestling with their ruffled emotions, disturbed by sparse stock footage clips of a bear.  Add in a lot of stupid decisions and high fives, guys fighting and rebonding with bro-fists, an independent soundtrack of songs that sound hand picked from American Idol… and supportive hugs. (Is this guy gonna cry!??) I’m telling you, because somebody has to warn you of this shit.

This is an early Sci-Fi (SyFy) production helmed by David DeCoteau (The Brotherhood series), a modern day Roger Corman who, in the last three years, has cranked out more cheese than Wisconsin – so whats to expect? Not much, and you don’t get much. Its an embarrassing spectacle of young adults attempting to define their feelings amidst their flight to survive. This is why I’d recommend it as intro-horror for younger ones – it doesn’t go over the top in any offensive departments.  No nudity, no bad language, no sex, no graphic violence. There’s no visual stimulation here, aside from mud stained shorts and red lines on their faces from accidents in their tortured truck.  CGI or otherwise.

Its energetic, silly, shiny, and edgy, if nothing else. But when the kills go down, its mostly just cheap 70’s style blood splatter stills on the camera lens. For serious horror film goers, don’t go near this. Its like the kid next door got a hold of a camera and went in the woods to make a “run away!” movie with his friends. If that really happens, have mercy and sit thru it, for them.  But if you’re gonna choose to watch this after everything we just went through, damn, you’re a self abusive son of a b – and I’ve failed in my efforts to defend your tastes.

P.S.  If you’re not a youngster wired to be prejudice against anything pre-2000, I highly recommend seeking out John Frankenheimer’s Prophecy (1979) for some adult caliber, violent, inside-out, monster bear, decapitation action.