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[Review] Absolutely Nothing Happens in ‘The Darkness’

Nearly five million people visit the Grand Canyon every year. Hikers, campers, white water rafters and families alike all travel to the iconic eroded geological wonder hoping to reconnect with nature, and bring home some cute photos and happy memories. However, when it’s time for the Taylor family to make their pilgrimage out to the famous tourist destination, what they bring back home with them turns out to be much more sinister.

The exposed rocks within the canyon are estimated at around 2000 million years old, but it only took a day for the Taylors’ son Michael (David Mazouz) to change their lives forever. A curious boy derailed socially by his autism, Michael’s sister Stephanie (Lucy Fry) leaves him on his own for only a second to go follow her friend, but it’s long enough for him to stumble upon some unique rocks bearing odd symbols, and shove them in his backpack without anyone seeing. Upon their arrival back home, Michael, Stephanie, and their parents Bronny (Radha Mitchell) and Peter (Kevin Bacon) start to notice strange events occurring, starting with a small fire, and erupting into a full on paranormal phenomena reaching out to them in their sleep. Michael has undoubtedly stirred some supernatural forces by bringing the ancient artifacts into his house, but can he appease the angry spirits he’s wronged in time to save his family and rid their home of this dangerous energy? Only time will tell, as he and the rest of the Taylors try to survive The Darkness.

On top of dealing with an evil curse, each of the family members in this movie have their own personal concerns. Parents Peter and Bronny haven’t slept together in ages, and Bronny begins to suspect that her husband is cheating on her with one of her very best friends. Stephanie, who at first appears to just be a normal teenager who withdraws into her room because she’s too cool for her family, actually turns out to have a serious eating disorder. Michael, although intelligent in his own right, has always acted a bit awkward in groups, but lately, his behavior is downright frightening, as he sits and stares at a blank wall in his room for hours on end, and forgoes any communication with the rest of the residents in the house.

At first, it may seem like this is a cast filled with fully developed characters who are each dealing with relatable, real life crises, but as the film rolls on, it becomes clear that these so-called issues are actually a thin excuse for a slow moving plot and a lack of action. Although the daughter is dealing with bulimia, a real disease that plagues many young girls, once ousted by her mother, she visits a doctor and seems to be immediately healed and back with her family a few scenes later, relatively unharmed. This isn’t just frustrating on a narrative level, but on an emotional one as well, since it seems to underplay a horrifying result of body dysmorphia that has ruined many lives in reality.

Likewise, the way that autism is handled in the film is frustrating as well, since its stereotypes, such as being good at math and bad at social situations, are emphasized to the point of coming across as slightly insulting. It’s true that people who suffer from autism can have difficulty communicating due to not understanding social norms, but the depiction of the disorder in the film seems more fitting for someone who is actually mentally challenged, since Michael doesn’t seem able to speak to anyone proficiently at all. It gets worse when the plot begins to suggest that the reason why Michael is able to pick up on these spooky spirits is because his autism makes him more privy to their ghostly presence.

The real problem with this movie, however, is that absolutely nothing happens. Occasionally, one of the Taylors will have a bad dream, just to be woken up in time to realize they’re perfectly safe, or a black handprint with grace their flawless white bed sheets, but mostly, we’re just watching a suburban stay at home mom go grocery shopping. Sometimes she switches it up, by taking a bath, or a dip in the pool, but that’s about as exciting as it gets in this predictable snoozer that’s almost completely devoid of scares.

The cast looks as bored as the audience feels, especially Kevin Bacon, who seems to be wondering how he got involved in this barely watchable project, which actually brings out more (unintentional) laughs than it does shrieks of terror. With Greg McLean at the helm, the writer/director of the absolutely petrifying 2005 Australian thriller Wolf Creek, this movie was sure to at least bring the fear, but the fact is that he didn’t stand much of a chance with a script as weak as this one. In the end, despite all of its attempts to connect to its audience through real life trauma, The Darkness is just another generic horror movie that goes through the motions and doesn’t reward the audience for its patience.