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The Perfect Shirt for the ‘Proud Straight Male Gamer’
Do you consider yourself to be a proud, straight male gamer? Does your excess of gruffy manliness overshadow the likes of Marcus Fenix and Duke Nukem? Do you feel the overwhelming desire to show your manliness to the WORLD? If you answered any of these questions with a resounding yes, probably in the same bearish voice you use when saving the innocent in alleyways in the dead of night, then this shirt has been designed with you in mind. For the people reading this with a confused expression on their face, Dragon Age II came out earlier this month and since then it’s been trying to force its steamy gay action in the face of all the straight male gamers. For some, this is a problem.
It’s obvious that no less than 99% of the gaming audience consists of straight males who only want to see explosions, big guns, tits and gore. So why should a company cater to the minority of players that enjoy their games? If you hate it when your companions hit on your blatantly straight male character in Dragon Age 2 then this is the best way to show the world you’re against that sort of thing. When you pass people on the street while wearing this fabulous specimen of gamer apparel, you’ll know exactly what you are. You’re a proud, straight male gamer with a kickass t-shirt. Head past the break to see the rest of the shirt, which I might say is no less incredible.
Oh, and since a startling number of people have the remarkable ability to misinterpret this; YES, this is a joke. It’s a little twisted and admittedly a little tasteless, but a joke nonetheless. And guess what? This joke now comes in PINK! BOO YAH!
All of us here at Bloody Disgusting are deeply sad to learn that The Blob director Chuck Russell has passed away at 74 years old.
Russell’s career began with his directorial debut, 1987’s A Nightmare on Elm Street 3: Dream Warriors.
The multihyphenate film director, screenwriter, and producer is best known for helming 1994 comedy The Mask starring Jim Carrey, Arnold Schwarzenegger actioner Eraser, and adventure spinoff The Scorpion King. The latter served as the first leading role for Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson.
The filmmaker left an indelible mark on horror with his ANOES sequel, 1988’s The Blob, and 2000’s Bless the Child.
Russell’s final film credit is 2024’s Witchboard remake starring Madison Iseman (I Know What You Did Last Summer), Aaron Dominguez (Only Murders in the Building), and Jamie Campbell Bower (“Stranger Things”).
It marked Russell’s return to horror after a lengthy hiatus, and he shared sequel hopes to Bloody Disgusting in an interview ahead of the remake’s release: “I got to design the board with real mystical symbols and things that I know represent good and evil, and where that board takes us if the audiences respond to the film, and I hope they will; I know it’s out there for you guys, but the sequel is a world we’ll get to go a little further. That’s sure the intention.”
He also recently expressed interest in returning to the franchise that began his career.
TMZ notes that Russell passed away at his San Diego-area home.
We send our deepest condolences to Chuck Russell’s family, friends, and fans.
Director, Co-Writer & Producer Chuck Russell behind the scenes of the horror film, WITCHBOARD. Photo courtesy of The Avenue and Atlas Distribution
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