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Why the Horror Trope of the Hard-Boiled Detective Protagonist Needs to End

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I typically only write when I feel like I have something meaningful to say – a specific insight into a movie, a humble suggestion to make a franchise more interesting or relevant… Rarely do I write hundreds of words simply to express my own personal beef with something as trivial as a horror trope that desperately needs to die.

Buckle up, buttercups, this is one of those rare occasions. What I’m about to say is my personal opinion. You aren’t required to agree.

So help me, if I ever again read a horror plot synopsis that begins with “A detective…” or lord have mercy in the case of Hellraiser: Judgment, “Three detectives…” I will put my hand through my laptop screen.

It needs to stop.

There are very specific instances where this sort of set-up has worked, and even those will almost certainly be debated over in the comments section regarding whether they are ‘real horror.’ Se7en worked. If you want to expand into the realm of the FBI, The Silence of the Lambs worked. But those were very specific tales of law enforcement agents hunting serial killers. Telling the story from the perspective of law enforcement made sense.

What makes less sense to me is taking the Hellraiser franchise and turning it into a police procedural. Or even the Saw series. The first installments of these franchises are considered classics and one of the reasons why is their embrace of one the basic tenets of good horror: relatability. Kirsty Cotton was an every-person whose weird uncle and stepmother brought Hell into her father’s home. Lawrence Gordon was a doctor, which most of us are not, but he didn’t have to be. Anyone, from any walk of life, seen as sufficiently ungrateful for their existence could be a Jigsaw target. You could imagine waking up with a bear-trap on your face because you dropped out of college or don’t call your Grandpa enough and that was what made the premise scary.

Movies use the protagonist as an avatar for the viewer. Michael Myers is scary because any one of us could be Laurie Strode, sitting in a house, babysitting a couple of kids, with a masked maniac standing outside holding an oversized steak knife he inexplicably wants to place inside you multiple times. Anyone can be Nancy, because we all sleep and we’re all one nightmare away from Freddy. The Freelings. The Lutz family. Even the crew of the Nostromo were working stiffs more interested in getting home and getting paid than anything. Almost any of your favorite horror movies have one thing in common and that’s a horrifying threat encroaching on familiar people. It’s not that hard to picture yourself in their shoes, the subtle message being drilled into your brain where it lies in wait for you to crawl into bed at night and stare into the dark – It could happen to you. And while we’re on the subject, that’s another reason Get Out was so effective at doing what it was intended to do – the black community doesn’t see a lot of protagonists in horror so excruciatingly relatable and the white community rarely gets such an opportunity to empathize with one.

You know who I have a much harder time empathizing with? Hard-boiled detectives. I don’t know why. Maybe it’s because they don’t exist. Not in the way they’re typically depicted on film. These brooding, hard-drinking, unshaven dudes who say things like “I’ve gotta catch this scumbag” below a normal conversational volume. I don’t know that guy. You don’t know that guy. You want a truly relatable detective? Watch Zodiac. David Toschi’s job is tedious and frustrating and it never leads to any fulfilling answers. Now that’s a guy people can relate to.

Of course, there are exceptions to every rule, and some rules were made to be broken. Again, see Se7en or The Silence of the Lambs. But if you’re trying to pull off horror by placing the audience in the shoes of a character like Mills or Starling you damn well better make them as relatable as Mills or Starling, both of whom were grounded in their respective backstories and greenhorn statuses. If you don’t, no matter how interesting your premise is – like say a puzzle box that acts as a figurative and literal gateway to pain and pleasure beyond your most perverse imaginings – it’s dead on arrival because we have no reason to care, and thus, no reason to be scared.

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Editorials

Neon-Soaked Cult Classic ‘Vamp’ Starring Grace Jones Still Has Bite 40 Years Later

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Vamp 1986
Grace Jones and Dedee Pfeiffer in Vamp

College kids, strippers and vampires—those were Donald P. Borchers’ only requirements when he approached Richard Wenk about writing and directing a movie for New World Pictures. As requested, Wenk cooked up Vamp (1986), a tailor-made blend of the decade’s teen movie craze as well as its horror boom.

Grim and earnest stories were still very much a part of the ’80s horror landscape, yet Vamp is something of a comedy. One difference between it and, say, Saturday the 14th, though, is the former avoids using schtick. Wenk’s movie proves that horror comedies also don’t have to subtract thrills from their recipes. Of course, it takes a minute before reaching that point; college antics and culture shocks preface this one macabre misadventure.

Vamp‘s initial setup is apt for a typical college-set, sex-driven comedy; to bribe their way into a fraternity house, two pledges (Chris Makepeace, Robert Rusler) go looking for some adult entertainment. Without wasting time on any further exposition, the characters embark on an all-in-one-night trip that quickly detours into terror.

To procure their elusive MacGuffin—a stripper willing to gyrate for some frat boys—Keith (Makepeace) and AJ (Rusler), plus a third wheel named Duncan (Gedee Watanabe), trade the safety of their remote college campus for the seediness of some unnamed city. The setting is recognizably L.A. by day, but as soon as night falls, downtown, along with the characters, slips into a kind of surreal universe. Director of photography Elliot Davis gave this early entry on his prolific résumé an unusual yet distinctive look; that Mario Bava-esque, magenta-green lighting is omnipresent, so much so that it’s almost its own character. 

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Chris Makepeace and Robert Rusler in Vamp

The faint comparisons to Martin Scorsese’s After Hours are merited, although not just because of Vamp’s distinguishing nighttime aesthetic. Save for the primary characters, the supporting roles in Wenk’s movie are also quite colorful and transactional in their behavior. The difference here, though, is the additional urge to ruin Keith and his friends at every turn. Some of that harm is humorous and tolerable enough, whereas the moment Vamp dishes out its first fatality, it’s abundantly clear how this movie qualifies as horror.

Vamp falls into that category of horror movie that reveals its genre with a scream rather than a series of whispers. The opening scene can function as a hint of what lies ahead—things are not at all what they appear to be—but otherwise, Wenk is more than happy to hold off on the horror. When that time does come, though, it catches the viewer off guard. In addition to the pure shock value is that sudden decision to upend the movie’s foremost feature. Or so it would seem.

If afraid of major spoilage, those new to Vamp would be wise to stop reading here. There’s just no skirting around the fact that the central fellowship in this buddy movie hits a serious snag when AJ is killed. That development causes the story to become more of a “long, bad night” journey for Keith and his romantic interest. So while Wenk scores points for subverting expectations, there is also a touch of sadness in his decision. Because if Vamp does anything well, it’s making the characters likable.

Something that comes easily to Vamp—and other teen horror movies from this same era—is its ability to invent young characters worth caring about, or at the very least, are interesting and not so immediately off-putting. More impressive is how Wenk did all this without actually fleshing out those characters. Still and all, Keith and his kind are a grade above cookie-cutter, and in some cases, aren’t completely devoid of growth.

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Grace Jones in Vamp

Vamp appeals with an assorted cast of characters. No two are the same, nor are they operating on the same wavelength. The cinematically extroverted AJ, whose actor conveyed charm and vulnerability in near equal amounts, comes alive when he’s at his most undead. Makepeace then makes the chronically cautious Keith a sympathetic fellow, even as he’s more and more affected by the night’s bizarre events. Meanwhile, Duncan is indeed the designated loser of the whole bunch, but Watanabe still manages to humanize him. As a bonus, the role didn’t require him to pull a Long Duk Dong.

As for Dedee Pfeiffer, she is plain adorable as the mysterious After Dark server nicknamed “Amaretto”. She spends all night fixing her dress strap while at the same time trying to get Keith to remember how he knows her. As their offbeat romance grows, it becomes another highlight of this movie. Whether or not Pfeiffer’s character is really a vampire also creates some welcome tension in the story.

Like a lot of its contemporaries, Vamp went on to become a bit of a cult classic. That current status is determined by several factors, but without a doubt, the casting of Grace Jones is the most considerable. The image of her writhing on that unique-looking chair, a Keith Haring original, springs to mind whenever this movie is brought up.

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Chris Makepeace, Billy Drago and Paunita Nichols in Vamp

Prior to that first display of unequivocal horror, local vampire queen Katrina (Jones) took to the stage and delivered a strip show like no other. One would expect nothing less from that renowned model and performance artist. By now reports of Jones’ tardiness on set are no secret, yet it’s also hard to deny her commitment to the part of Katrina. It was, in fact, Jones who took charge of her character’s appearance—on top of Haring painting her body and that now-iconic chair, she had Andy Warhol handle her costuming. And not too many actors could seize a room’s attention without saying a single line of dialogue.

In 2022, Vamp received a retrospective novelization from Encyclopocalypse. This literary union of preexisting source material—Wenk’s original screenplay—and new ideas from author Christian Francis amounts to a more comprehensive visit to the After Dark Club. The basic story there is no different than what’s shown on screen; however, Francis gets creative with the characters’ origins and designs, and he enhances a number of key scenes.

The novelization expands on the urban and social decay of the main setting, and supplies a background for the After Dark Club. Sandy Baron’s character, Katrina’s emcee and familiar, is given ample motivation for sticking around; up until the fiery end, he is loyal to his friend and former business partnerSqueak, who looks like he wasfed through a combine harvester, and left as nothing more than a heap of mangled remains. Then there is Billy Drago’s character Snow, the leader of a street gang called The Dragons. His reason for menacing Keith and AJ is more altruistic than in the movie; he and his peers act tough to scare off any potential food for the vampires. 

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Lisa Lyon in Vamp

If not for all the backstories, Francis’ Vamp would be a hell of a lot shorter. Instead, this tie-in read dives into how AJ met Keith—the orphaned Anthony Joseph hailed from a broken home back in Brooklyn—and how their friendship flourished over the years. Keith’s archership is no longer just an assumed part of his entire being; it’s a confidence-building extracurricular for a boy who got picked on before coming into the protection of the new kid in town. These supplemental, in-depth looks at the protagonists, plus their close connection, are maybe unnecessary. The movie already did a fair and concise job of addressing their platonic intimacy without the need for flashbacks and insights, specifically in that scene where AJ lays it all out as he sacrifices himself.

Where the novelization gets off course is its approach to the minor characters. Intermittently backstorying the likes of Katrina’s indentured servants, Seko (Leila Hee Olsen) and Vlad (Brad Logan), ends up disturbing the flow of the writing. Was it absolutely essential that readers know Vlad was the Grand Duke of the House of Romanov, or how Snow’s accomplice Maven (Paunita Nichols) became so dentally challenged? No, not really. However, one’s mileage with these random biographies may vary.

The novelization is a more substantial experience, but for a movie like Vamp, less is more. And as plentiful as they are, it never simply coasts on its campy charms, either. The character work sits comfortably in that realm between cursory and meticulous, the script is sharper than first realized, and Greg Cannom’s vampire makeup is straightforward yet effective. Most of all, the movie didn’t squander its out-of-the-box concept. Richard Wenk made his vision of acomic nightmare in which just about anything that can go wrong doescome true, and it is very enjoyable.

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