Editorials
Love Hurts: Horror’s 10 Most Brutal Romances
Sometimes there’s nothing more horrifying than falling in love. While horror can show off the softer, sweeter aspects of relationships, like Spring, it knows how to shine an uncomfortable spotlight on the darker aspects of romance. The isolating painful emotions of unrequited love, lost love, or even the sting of a lover’s betrayal, horror plays on the worst possible fears when it comes to romance. Forget Valentine’s day horror staples like My Bloody Valentine or 2001’s Valentine; these horror movies will make you realize just how nasty and cruel love can be. This Valentine’s Day, commiserate with horror’s most spurned by love with the most brutal romances on screen:
Frank Cotton and Julia Cotton – Hellraiser
Prior to marrying Larry Cotton, Julia had an affair with his brother, Frank. Frank went off to Morocco and got into some trouble with a certain Lament Configuration and that was that. Until Larry cut himself while moving into Frank’s house, unwittingly resurrecting Frank in the process. Julia’s carnal obsession with Frank renewed, she begins bringing men back to the house and murdering them to help regenerate the skinless walking corpse in the attic to her erstwhile lover’s old self. Poor Larry doesn’t even know what hit him. Oblivious to his wife’s obsession with his undead brother, and Frank’s bloodthirsty zest for life, Larry ends up a hapless skin suit. It’s Julia, however, that comes out the biggest loser, when she realizes too late that she meant absolutely nothing to her lover Frank. It’s a comprehension that dawns upon her at the pointy end of his blade.
Chucky and Tiffany – Bride of Chucky
It’s fitting that Tiffany’s last name is Valentine, as her introduction brought something to the series that we never expected; love. It’s the very human Tiffany that retrieves the remains of the Good Guy doll from police evidence and revives him via ritual. The reunited lovers gleefully embark on another murder spree, proving the couple that slays together, stays together. But two psychopathic killers don’t fight like normal couples, and between trapping Tiffany’s soul into her own murderous doll and the mundane chores of life, namely dishes, Tiffany and Chucky battle it out in the most violent ways. Throw in a fundamental difference on how to handle an unexpected pregnancy, and the volatile relationship between Tiffany and Chucky gets downright lethal.
Lola and Brent – The Loved Ones
Lola wants nothing more than to be the Princess her dad tells her she is, and find her Prince Charming. She decides that Brent is the one and invites him to the school dance. When he rejects her offer and she sees him with another girl, well, she decides she’ll get what she wants one way or another. Enlisting her father’s help, Brent is kidnapped and brutally tortured. After sticking a syringe full of bleach in Brent’s voice box, nailing his feet down to the floor, and carving in his skin, Lola decides love is a fickle thing and perhaps Brent isn’t the ideal prince after all. The truth is that maybe no one will love her as much as daddy, and that’s most terrifying of all.
Seth Brundle and Veronica Quaife – The Fly
Really one of horror’s most tragic love stories, and one that’s also more of an intriguing triangle than pair, David Cronenberg’s body horror remake runs the gamut of emotions. The initial sparks between journalist Veronica and quirky scientist Seth gives way to a full-blown relationship. But Seth harbors some insecurity toward Veronica’s relationship with her editor Stathis Borans, a former lover who clearly still has feelings for her. It’s an insecurity that’s dramatically heightened when Seth begins his metamorphosis into the Brundle-fly; the genetic merging of human and fly. As Veronica watches in horror as her lover’s nails and teeth begin falling out, his body becomes insect-like, and he starts vomiting digestive enzymes onto his food, her fears increase to unmanageable levels with the discovery that she’s pregnant by Seth. It’s the turning point that propels this twisted love story into gross-out catastrophe.
Marie and Alex – High Tension
Best friends Alex and Marie getaway to the countryside home of Alex’s family for a weekend of studying. It’s derailed quickly when a warped serial killer shows up and viciously slaughters Alex’s family. When the killer kidnaps Alex, Marie embarks on the most admirable quest to save her friend from the clutches of the most unnerving killers to come from the mind of Alexandre Aja in his breakout hit. True to its title, High Tension is one of the most intense cat and mouse games to watch unfold, and Marie’s desperation to save her friend is only rivaled by her fervent unrequited love for her best friend. It’s only once she finally does that Aja delivers one of horror’s most polarizing twists (obvious spoiler ahead): Marie’s obsession with her best friend has split her psyche in two; the perverse killer was really Marie all along. Alex might not return Marie’s love, but that won’t stop her from loving her any less. Crowbar to the chest and all.
Yoji and Sachiko – Meatball Machine
From the special effects artist, Yoshihiro Nishimura, who handled the insane gore effects from Tokyo Gore Police and The Machine Girl, this wacky Japanese sci-fi splatter film centers around the love story between Yoji and Sachiko. Yoji is a shy factory worker with an unrequited crush on co-worker Sachiko. When he discovers Sachiko being sexually assaulted by another co-worker, his attempt to save her ends in dismal failure, but it’s the effort that counts and she ends up going home with him. But Yoji’s been hiding a strange alien insect in his apartment, and the thing merges with Sachiko, turning her into a bio-mechanical monster. When Yoji is also infected, the two would-be lovers are forced to eventually fight to the death. Over the top ridiculous gore, violence, and sensory overload, Yoji and Sachiko’s star-crossed love story feels like an acid trip for the extreme. It’s brutal.
Frank Zito and Anna D’Antoni – Maniac (2012)
Co-written by Alexandre Aja and directed by Franck Khalfoun, this surprisingly good remake gives serial killer Frank a much more sympathetic persona, painting him as a sort of tragic character created by his traumatic upbringing. Frank wants to find love, using an online dating site to meet women. He just gets nervous, panics, and winds up scalping them instead. Enter Anna, a photographer that’s charmed by the antique mannequins in his storefront. The pair embark on a warm friendship that causes Frank to want more from Anna. So earnest is his crush on Anna that he even takes his jealousy out on other victims when he first meets Anna’s boyfriend, murdering Anna’s mentor instead (granted, she did mock him). Elijah Wood does such a great job humanizing Frank, that you actually believe him when he tells Anna he doesn’t want to hurt her upon being outed as a killer. Frank’s story is one of unrequited love, an outsider destined to be perpetually alone among his bloody collection of scalps.
Henry and Becky – Henry: Portrait of a Serial Killer
I know, Henry: Portrait of a Serial Killer is a chilling character study of a serial killer, not a love story. But you try telling that to Becky, the sister of Henry’s latest partner in crime. To Becky, a woman who recently fled from an abusive husband, Henry’s aloof persona and brutal honesty is attractive. She also has no idea that her brother, Otis, and Henry have been on a murder spree, sometimes even going so far as to film their exploits. For someone used to being the victim of overbearing, abusive men, Becky is charmed by Henry’s shy recoil of her seduction attempts. And when Henry saves her from Otis’ attempt to murder her, she’s completely head over heels smitten with her savior. Becky is the poster child when it comes to falling for the worst possible partners in love.
Frank and Anna – Beyond the Darkness
There’s perhaps no other romance more twisted than that of taxidermist Frank Wyler and his fiancée Anna. She dies in the hospital from a mysterious illness that, unbeknownst to Frank, is really a voodoo curse placed on her by Frank’s jealous housekeeper Iris. So beside himself with grief, Frank decides to taxidermize her to keep her with him forever. It’s gory and gross, as to be expected by director Joe D’Amato (of Video Nasty Anthropophagus fame), and only gets weirder as the story progresses. Iris takes creepy advantage of Frank’s grief, and together the pair get homicidal. There’s unsettling erotic breastfeeding, hacked up victims that are then dissolved in acid baths, and Frank even gets a little cannibalistic when victims don’t appreciate the preserved body of Anna. Sometimes losing the one you love can drive you to madness, but Frank takes it to a whole new, twisted level.
Asami Yamazaki and Shigeharu Aoyama – Audition
You’d be forgiven for watching the first half of Takashi Miike’s seminal film and forgetting that you’re watching horror at all. Miike lulls you into thinking you’re watching a quiet love story unfold between widower Shigeharu and the enchanting Asami. So deliberate in pacing, it’s easy to overlook the minor red flags that there’s something seriously amiss with his new-found love. The more he falls head over heels Asami, the more he wants to know about her past. The more he tugs at the threads of her past, the more her veneer unravels, until it builds into the most terrifying and explosive finale. Asami’s gleeful giggling as she uses piano wire to forever tether her new love to her is the stuff of nightmares. There’s nothing sweet or innocent at all about this sick tale of online dating gone horribly wrong.
Editorials
Before ‘The Blair Witch Project’, ‘Alien Autopsy’ Showed How Real Found Footage Could Feel
The line separating artist from con man is a lot thinner than you might initially believe. While I think we can all agree that lying for the sake of profit is actively malicious behavior, isn’t it also true that the faux documentary aspect of The Blair Witch Project is half the reason why that film became such a cultural phenomenon? After all, if there’s one thing filmmakers have in common with stage magicians, it’s that misleading and misdirecting audiences is simply part of the job.
That’s why I’ve developed a habit of mostly ignoring the moral quandaries behind many of film and television’s biggest “hoaxes” in favor of appreciating the narrative elements that drive productions like Mermaids: The Body Found and even Animal Planet’s highly underrated The Cannibal in the Jungle. However, if there’s a definitive case of a highly publicized broadcast fooling the world into taking it seriously, it has to be Fox’s infamous 1995 TV special Alien Autopsy: Fact or Fiction.
It’s been over three decades since that eerie footage first haunted television screens right at the peak of the ’90s ufology craze, and in that time, the video has taken on a life of its own. From countless parodies and references in everything from The X-Files to Tony Hawk’s Pro Skater (as well as John Dower’s recently released tell-all documentary The Alien Autopsy Scandal, which I’d highly recommend to genre fans everywhere), there’s no denying the legacy of the Alien Autopsy video. However, I rarely see the tape discussed as what it truly is: a highly convincing found footage film directed by a passionate stage magician and brought to life by masterful practical effects work.
That’s why I’d like to invite readers to join me on a deep dive into one of the most infamous broadcasts of all time in an attempt to reevaluate the footage as a fascinating narrative experience rather than a complete hoax.
The TV Special That Convinced Millions It Was Real
Ray Santilli next to Extraterrestrial replica in ‘The Alien Autopsy Scandal’
For starters, regardless of whether or not you believe that there was in fact an extraterrestrial crash in Roswell during the summer of 1947 and that some form of autopsy was performed on the victims, the producers behind the black & white recordings, Ray Santilli and Gary Shoefield, insist that their video was a “restoration.” Though I’d argue that the proper word is “remake”of genuine footage that was too damaged to air on television. That’s why the duo went on to recruit filmmaker and eccentric magician Spyros Melaris and sculptor/monster designer John Humphreys to bring their version of the autopsy to life and sell it to the highest bidder.
This is where the story of the Alien Autopsy as a narrative experience really begins. Melaris claims that his approach to the faux recording consisted of striving for extreme period accuracy in both shooting equipment and setting while also planting subtle details that would initially seem like mistakes but could later be revealed to actually fit the time period. That being said, the filmmaker was under the impression that the short would be released for free as a PR stunt, with the team later producing and selling an informative documentary chronicling exactly how the footage was faked and commenting on how easy it is to manipulate public perception with a good old-fashioned magic trick.
This obviously isn’t how things went down, and that’s likely the reason why Melaris has since distanced himself from everyone else involved with the project. Yet, no amount of behind-the-scenes drama can undermine the genuine effort that went into making the short as impressive as it is. From the sourcing of real animal organs from a local butcher to make the organic part of the creature more lifelike to the highly detailed sculpt that made use of a hollowed-out underlayer that could be filled with fake blood and assorted viscera, there’s a reason why so many Hollywood specialists are still impressed with the artistry on display here.
Of course, the believability is only half the story, as I think that the best part of the autopsy is how Melaris builds on the existing tension by obscuring certain details and often embracing the chaos of what a real examination of extraterrestrial life could feel like. The camera often goes out of focus at just the right time to make certain effects hit even harder, and we can only speculate as to what the hazmat-suited doctors are gesticulating about during the operation. There’s a real air of mystery to the whole thing that almost makes it feel like a cosmically terrifying, cursed film containing forbidden knowledge that civilians were never meant to see.
So when Fox’s Fact or Fiction brings in the specialists to comment on the film and its otherworldly subject, it’s no surprise that we end up with one of the most memorable mockumentaries of all time – albeit one where the participants are unaware that the footage they’re commenting on is basically a large-scale practical joke. A joke that the network was obviously in on, as many participants claim that the TV special cut out significant portions where guests point out that they believe the footage to be an elaborate hoax.
The Lasting Impact of the Hoax Turned Cultural Event
Regardless, I remember going to bed terrified after watching reruns of the special and thinking about the respected pathologist who claimed that the body was almost certainly inhuman, with even effects maestro Stan Winston commenting on how difficult it would be to recreate some of these visuals through practical puppetry. That’s not even mentioning Jonathan Frakes’ dramatic hyping up of the disturbing imagery as if he was talking about the tape from The Ring, with his spooky demeanor here likely being responsible for his later role as the host of Beyond Belief: Fact or Fiction a few years later.
Personally, I’d argue that the Alien Autopsy phenomenon had just as much of an impact on me as a horror fan as The Blair Witch Project, a film that was almost certainly influenced by the success of this immensely popular hoax (to the point where they even produced their own TV special commenting on Heather’s found footage). Even if Fox didn’t intend to produce a narrative feature about the aftermath of the Roswell crash, the end product still holds up remarkably well as a highly entertaining mockumentary exploring the idea that we may not be alone in the universe.
While neither Santilli nor the rest of the production team has ever commented on this, I also think it’s very likely that the idea of a faux Alien Autopsy could have been influenced by Dean Alioto’s The McPherson Tape/UFO Abduction. I’ve already written about how this granddaddy of found footage was co-opted by rogue ufologists who began selling bootlegs of the tape at conventions as if it were real evidence of a close encounter, so it’s not that much of a stretch to imagine that Santilli and company could have heard about this phenomenon and been inspired to come up with their own highly profitable hoax.
At the end of the day, it’s unlikely that the Alien Autopsy film is recreating any real footage from Roswell, but I can still appreciate the short and the accompanying television event as a standalone horror story that still influences the way we see found footage to this very day.
After all, the possibility that something could be real is often much scarier than finding out for sure – and that’s why I think Alien Autopsy: Fact or Fiction is still worth revisiting three decades down the line.
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